By John Walker on October 11th, 2007 at 11:42 pm.
So this is weird. Tonight, in a fit of madness and love, I emailed Valve’s over-harrassed PR wunder-human to demand that they immediately begin manufacturing a Weighted Companion Cube plush toy to add to their range. (While over there, I spotted a prototype Hunter plushie, which was all kinds of cute). And then I find they’ve already confirmed it, via the least official means possible.
PC Gamer report that an email from Gabe Newell was posted on Penny Arcade’s forum, assuring him that cuddly cubes will be out before Christmas. Or as I prefer to put it to everyone who loves me, in time for Christmas.
So if a forum post linked via a blog post (for a magazine that appears to have completely THIEVED our guide for getting That Song from your files without crediting us at all – I’d assume they sourced it from elsewhere as is hugely likely, but then I’d not be able to feel self-righteous) is true, hip-hip: hooray!
Now, the question remains, will they be making plush incinerators?
I… want… one! Scratch that, I want a whole fluffy army of them!
Question is – how big will they be? Big enough to hold in your hand or life size and seat or pillow like?
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They’ll call it half-life-sized… I reckon they will be quite small but if I was going to buy one I’d want it to be life-size.
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Me + Weighted Companion Cube = BFF.
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Plush incinerator be damned, I want a plush 1500 megawatt Aperture Science heavy duty supercolliding superbutton.
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Headcrab + Weighted Companion Cube = private fantasy
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In the words of The Spy, oh please. I’ve had a Counter-Strike sound file as my ringtone for as long as you’ve known me. I was decompressing GCF files before you were born! Which was also before I was born or existed in any meaningful sense! Existence is for pansies.
PS. Thanks for the link.
PPS. If anyone’s jonesing for another great song, Ze Frank’s just put out another masterpiece: http://www.zefrank.com/zesblog/archives/2007/10/fer_you.html
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No, no, NO! The Weighted Companion Cube should be a minifridge, dammit!
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No,
The cube should be Solid, Square and Cuddly.
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Oh happy day! RPS is currently Google Numero Uno for ‘weighted companion cube’ searches.
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If your WCC is cuddly, how will you ever stand on it to reach out-of-reach places? Huh? HUH?
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Oh happy day! RPS is currently Google Numero Uno for ‘weighted companion cube’ searches.
You may as well kick off the weighted companion cube slash fiction topic now. It’s only a matter of time. I’ll start.
I bent over and stroked weighted companion cube. It feels like she sighed a little and relaxed, beckoning me in.
“I want you inside me,” she seemed to say. If only the weighted companion cube could speak I would have done.
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Is the weighted companion a girl? Obviously the pink suggests it but a game where you play a lesbian? Jack Thompson will be all over them!
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“Oh happy day! RPS is currently Google Numero Uno for ‘weighted companion cube’ searches.”
Congratulations, you’re also number one for ‘weighted companion cube slash fiction’.
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The weighted companion cube is an inanimate crate with no sexual organs. But that doesn’t mean it can’t have feelings.
Although it does mean that it can’t speak.
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Bah, it is Solid and it is Square in addition to Cuddly.
Solid + Square = Condusive to standing on it to reach out-of-reach places.
Do the math.
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I decided one weighted companion cube wasn’t enough:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/54947936@N00/1550523497/
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Spoiler: The Companion Cube is definitely male. GLaDOS says “But he couldn’t come because you murdered him.”
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But he lives! He’s in the credits ^.^
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There’s also cake in the credits. And as we all know, the cake is a lie.
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“The cake is a lie” is a lie.
Also, these are spoilers. Are we allowed to be spoiling?
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Ugh the lack of voice in both Portal and ep 2 is really causing widespread problems.
Luckily Portal was fine for me but EP 2 bugged out but at least by then I knew of the problem, and it was more obvious with alyx just miming to me all the time…
I just found out my mate was up to level 18 in portal and thinking it was dead boring… then I came to see what he was up to and lo and behold GLaDOS wasn’t talking to him, which of course you have no way ever of knowing that unless you’ve seen someone else play it or heard about it. (Or have captioning on)
Thankfully I convinced him to fix it up and start from the start again, however I did have to let on that from level 18 he probably still had an hour to go to finish as he was like nah fuck it I’ll just finish it then go through again, but I begged him to start again to actually realise that the game is pretty crap without GLaDOS (and of course the ending would be not much of a surprise)
This is a pretty widespread bug and a bit of a shame on Valve’s part. I’d hate to know how many people have had portal effectively ruined by it!
Many people will be none the wiser! There isn’t even mention of it on the steampowered tech support (after my admittedly brief look)
shame really
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I want a small weighted companion cube to adorn my desktop (as in: the top of my desk in the Real World) and also a PC case version. Or a “skin” for my gamecube.
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I just want a t-shirt that says (please god let this HTML work) THECAKEISALIE
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Poo.
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I made a wallpaper for the companion cube, grab high res + widescreen versions of it at my deviantart page: http://coldwolf.deviantart.com/art/Portal-love-67101524
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my cube told me his name is Wilson!
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so where will you be able to buy one?
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Weighted Companion Cube
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bah it cut my post….. WCC Cube
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ok nvm it keeps cutting my post, can’t wait till christmas
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1st how did your cube tell you it’s name was wilson and if you guys really wanna know something cool look up “easter eggs for portal” and you will find a cool video where a person figures out how to walk through the end sequence video AND go outside with wcc it is AWESOME!!!! actually i’ll just give you the video (love the song lol ~.^) http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=8904794562069714159&q=easter+eggs+for+portal&total=8&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=0
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If any of you are on Second Life, I’m making a weighted companion cube for it right now. XD
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W.W.W.C.C.D
We need wrist bands!!!
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can ne one tell me how the game ends? i cant finish it because i WILL NOT kill my WCC. WILL NOT!!!!!
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You get cake!
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i wonder if a fleshlight will fit inside of one?
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hamtax, that’s genuinely disturbing!
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it should not be plush.. that’s dumb. should be hard plastic.. maybe have the pink lines light up for your desk. yep.
they should also make small hard plastic keychains.. or metal ones
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i’ve also been making wallpapers of WCC
http://berdwin.deviantart.com/gallery/
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OMG W.W.W.C.C.D. WRISTBANDS!!!!
get on it, valve.
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http://lovethecube.blogspot.com/
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I reckon I could make a passable companion cube plushie out of felt… as practice before I try out softer materials…
But I’m more tempted to make a cake of one. It is mine and the Mistah’s anniversary, after all…
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lol, Portal was fun :D love the Cube!!
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i have plans to make a W.C.C computer case mod
and i will name the computer GLaDOS
just to be juxtapositioning
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Screw a plushie.
I want a BIG one that I can open and sleep in damnit all!
And mine’s name is Captain Fuzzles Porkin Bob. ^_^
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Mine was called Crispin, he is my favourite, when you deflect an energy ball with him, he gets singed. a taste of things to come i guess :(
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whats a companion cube?
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Weighted Companion Cube is the most faithful friend you will ever betray.
Your Weighted Companion Cube will gladly stand between you and an oncoming High Energy Pellet (side effects may include vaporization). Weighted Companion Cube will literally elevate you to a higher, place in life.
The only thing it would never do, is threaten to stab you.
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weighted companion Cube car dice?
…the cake was a lie :’(
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NOOOOOO!!!
I’m gonna make my own, full size, dense-foam core weighted companion cube.
Where the hell am I going to find good foam for this?
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http://www.efoam.co.uk/
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Would anybody like a WCC animated sig? Take a look at this, for those of you who like the desktop wallpapers. :)
http://i237.photobucket.com/albums/ff9/Lurkily/Temporary%20dross%20and%20crap/CompanionCubeInsanityAnim.gif
And tell me if you like it, here. It’s not a Portal forum, or even any Steam game forum, but it’s where I posted my poll, and right now the people who care have it as 5-3 in favor. Not a resounding endorsement.
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i want this t-shirt from CAD…
“I’ve got a couple of new shirt designs that I’m hoping we’ll have out before Christmas. The first is pretty self explanatory:”
http://www.ctrlaltdel-online.com/images/news/forevercube.jpg
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The CaKE Is hOLOgrAPHIC… ThATS wHY
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I am a jewelery student and currently learning how to solder sheets of metal together…might take this opportunity to make a WCC belt buckle or a set of WWC/Cake earings ^_^
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I ate cake.
Very moist one.
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HI
someone has made a game about the weighted companion cube!! its mental! cant wait for the final game
heres the url :
http://www.the-wcc-game.co.nr/
cool
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Is there counseling for people who have “euthanised” their WCC?
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Are they going to release them for THIS Christmas?
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And, its released :D
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