Duke Nukem Forever Wednesday

By John Walker on December 19th, 2007 at 10:42 am.

PC gaming’s favourite joke is trying to give the impression that next year’s promise of a release is really, really, really true this time. And at around 6pm (UK) today, the “first” teaser trailer will be released. You know, after the trailer released in 2001. Six years ago. 3D Realms bossman George Broussard appeared on the company’s forums to announce the exciting news that gaming’s most unreleased game is going to receive a teaser, and to offer a screenshot of said short (their servers are too busy to show it, so here it is below).

The face of a liar.
“Gameplay footage?” the world asks in excitement? Or ironic excitement if you’ve been listening to 3D Realms’ nonsense about this alleged game for the last decade. “Um,” quickly comes back the reply from Broussard.

“This is a teaser. It’s not a full blown trailer like the 2001 trailer (but something like that is coming). I tried to be clear about that in the message board post, so just bear in mind that it’s a teaser.”

So a render? Any footage at all? Or just Duke growling at the camera? Come on 6pm! How can we ever wait?!

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25 Comments »

  1. Nallen says:

    They knew, didn’t they?

    I mean when they called it ‘Forever’.

    It’s just one ten year long joke.

  2. Bobsy says:

    To be honest, I’ll be sad when DNF finally hits the shelves. I mean, it’s become an old friend, a companion in the gaming world. Whatever happens, DNF will always be there. But if it actually gets a release, it’ll stop, wither and die. And we’ll forget it, like we forgot Daikatana.

  3. Kast says:

    I wonder how the devs and publishers are going to justify the extended development time. And how they expect to even break even.

    As for the game itself – I’m feeling distinctly ‘meh’ about it all. I’m bored of mindless, brutish FPSs as it is and DNF does nothing to entice me back. Even if the combat is the stuff Jesus would code, the whole subject matter and tone synonymous with the Duke puts me off bothering with playing the demo, let alone purchasing the full game.

  4. Phil says:

    What are the odds that after ten years development time it’ll still need patch within two weeks?

  5. John Walker says:

    Kast, don’t forget that Duke 3 was a pastiche of such games, while also being a wonderful example of the genre. Um, can you pastiche while being one of the first to do it? Oh, I don’t know. What I do know is that it was bloody brilliant, and completely hilarious, rather than just brainless bawdy shooting. I hope against hope that Forever will maintain the same.

  6. Sombrero says:

    it was a pastiche (i don’t like using fancy words) of the films these games are all derived from so it can get away with it (Arnie Being the obvious referance)

  7. Ben Hazell says:

    What I wonder is, what’s been paying their bills this whole time?

  8. Janek says:

    Probably the big piles of money they get from.. publishing.. stuff.

  9. Piratepete says:

    meh

  10. Paul says:

    There’s not a hope in hell that the finished game will live up to the hype. It’ll probably be ‘ok’ in the same way that Prey was when it finaly hit shelves.
    You can almost see the reviews talking about how it feels like a ten year old game design thats been pushed into the present day with some fancy graphics and a sense of humour thats dated badly.

  11. KruddMan says:

    eeeehhh— I’m still excited. I don’t think I could not be.

  12. roBurky says:

    How can there be any hype surviving all these years, Paul? I seriously don’t remember anything about this.

  13. Richard says:

    What I wonder is, what’s been paying their bills this whole time?

    Max Payne’s the biggie. And of course, Duke 3D earned a lot of money over the years.

  14. Meat Circus says:

    I suspect that 3DR are wondering how much longer this particularly tedious practical joke can be played for.

    I think it will be impossible to carry it on past 2011, and sooner or later somebody will have to admit that there never was and never was going to be a DNF.

  15. Pidesco says:

    I think this is like the most awesome marketing campaign ever. They’re just waiting until everyone has completely given up on the game. Only then will they release DNF, and it will be so amazingly and surprisingly awesome that everyone will go into fits of hysteria over Dune Nukem’s perfection. It’s kind of like starving. Food tastes much better when your starving and you’ve practically given up on your chances of getting a meal.

    Well either that, or they’re just stalling because they know the game will be a massive disappointment. But I’m pretty sure it’s one of these two.

  16. Alex says:

    I’ve never been excited about DNF – cos DN3D was kinda, well, meh for me. So let’s reframe this. Imagine if we were talking about something really exciting – Doug Church and Warren Spector getting back together – at Valve – to make System Shock 3 – or let’s go the whole hog and say Underworld 3 – would I still thrill to the possibility of it seeing the light of day EVEN after ten years?

    Hell yeah. I’ve waited 15-odd years (so far) to meet the love of my life, I can wait 10 years for that rarest of things, a genuinely awesome game.

    Pity, then, that as I say the idea of DNF doesn’t float my boat :)

  17. roryok says:

    well, I was a big duke fan from the outset. I can remember making maps for duke3d, and waiting for DNF so i could do some mapping with a more advanced game engine. I got a bit tired of waiting and decided to try out a new game instead, something called ‘Unreal’. that was 1998.

    Its almost ten years since then and still no sign of it, but I fully expect it’ll be out next year. It’ll never live up to the hype of course. Nothing can. But then again, Half-Life 2 also had an awful lot of hype to live up to.

    People look back at duke3d and think of it as a brainless shooter because the lead character was a typical action hero. But the actual game implementation was far from brainless, introducing us to all sorts of interactive gameplay that had never been seen before, providing hours of fun and endless mod possibilities with the bundled editing tools (one of the first games to bundle the actual tools used to make the game if I’m not mistaken)

    Whatever you think of DNF, you have to admire 3dr for sticking to their guns in the face of all the howls of derisive laughter the internet has unleashed upon them again and again over the years, and for refusing to rush something they’ve already spent over a decade trying to get right.

  18. mno says:

    Forget about Duke Nukem, i want Shadow Warrior 2. Lo Wang Come For You!

  19. Pod says:

    Duke looks like Bruce Willis these days. My, what age can do to a person…

  20. Wrestlevania says:

    It’ll be Prey – less portals, plus pole dancers – with a bit of light swearing thrown in for good measure.

    Garbage, in other words.

  21. kid says:

    an hour to go?
    hell yes!

  22. The_B says:

    An hour early, here it is.

    Now hurry up RPS, and get it up here. Bloody inferior Shacknews.

  23. malkav11 says:

    There’s no way it’ll be better as a game than it is as a running gag.