Dawn of War Faction Speculation & Sweepstakes

By Kieron Gillen on April 4th, 2008 at 1:10 am.


Dawn of War 2′s a go. Which means it’s time to indulge in some completely groundless speculation, intermixed with gags and geek-local-colour. The big question is… what races do we get to play? 40k is a big place. There isn’t room for everyone. Who’ll make the grade in a grim universe where there is only war (again)? Beneath the cut you’ll find a breakdown of the contenders we may see, both likely and not so likely.

Read ‘em, see what you think. Put your prediction for what the races in Dawn of War will be in the comments thread. No prizes, bar bragging rights. Arguing and debating and taking offence over meanness at Tau is also encouraged.


SPACE MARINES
They are? The Adeptus Astartes, a million-strong warrior brotherhood who… okay. Think of 40k. If you’re even aware of it, what you’re thinking of is almost certainly a Space Marine. They’re eight-foot genetically modified power-armoured superfascists. What’s not to love?
What are their chances? A dead cert. An enormous percentage – something like 50%, according to some bloke I met in a in pub once – of the 40k figurines sold are Space Marines. In a real way, the Space Marines are 40k. If you want to lengthen the odds a little, you could speculate they may, rather than vanilla Space Marines, include some of the special rules for individual Chapters (Marines’ Military Unit) to personalise them a little. And – y’know – they’re in the press release.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: There were some sources back in the day which hinted that the Space Marines have their genitalia removed as part of their induction process. Or, at least, that’s what you should say to Space Marine players, as it always gets a rise.
Odds: Evens favourite.


ORKZ
They are? If you don’t know 40k, you’re probably a little lost now. Orkz? Whatever could they be. Well, swap the kz for a cs… ah, yes. That’s right. They’re Orcs, in space, with a K and a Z. Enormously loveable homicidal maniacs with a habit of going on crusades they call WAAAAAARGHs. Why? For no reason at all, my friend, for no reason at all.
What are their chances? A strong contender. They’re one of the main races, and they were in the initial set of Dawn of War. Also, they’re mentioned in the leaked Benelux PC mag article. Assuming they’re right, they’re in. And if they’re not, you can blame Benelux when you lose your money for betting on them. They’re also – er – in the press release too. So you can blame THQ. You can do a whole lot of blaming.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: They’re actually a symbiotic life-form with fungi. Yes, they’re basically mushrooms with attitude.
Odds: 1/1, but less favourite, somehow.


THE TYRANID
They are? HR Geiger-influenced Hive-mind-controlled monsters who move from planet to planet, consuming everything. Like Locusts, except it’s rare you find a locust that’s weighs several tons. They’re the Zerg, basically. Or, rather, the Zerg are them.
What are their chances? They’re a popular race – they’re also the only major 40k race which didn’t appear in the original Dawn of War. Relic repeated cited technological limitations. Now, with the sequel, expectations are high. In fact, the only thing preventing them being a shoe-in is that they’re so clearly lusted after. They could sell an expansion pack by themselves, if THQ wanted to be cynical.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: “Worked out the secret of the Tyranids? They’re the final weapon of the Old Ones, released when the Necron re-emerged, in a final attempt to get rid of them. Think about it – in which direction did the Old Ones disappear? Which direction are the Tyranid coming from? And who makes biological weapons? And what’s the most impressive Biological weapon in the 40k universe?” This will mean nothing to anyone but the hardest core 40kite, but in them will probably induce excited babbling.
Odds: 3/1


CHAOS
They are? While there’s no good guys in 40k, it’s safe to say that Chaos are the actual Baddest Guys. Tyranids just want to eat everything and poop it out as a chitinous thing with exciting mandibles. But Chaos is about eternal damnation, reality itself warping into insane shapes, a scream, forever, forever, fore… well, they’re not nice. Unless you think that being reduced to a screaming mishapen ever-living bolus of flesh that looks like the result of a one-night stand between the chubbiest game developer at GDC and a Tumour. In which case, they’re very nice indeed.
What are their chances? For some variety of Chaos, very good indeed. The Chaos Space Marines are the Space Marines’ dark mirror, and an absolutely key part of the whole mythos. Where things may be more unpredictable is exactly what strain of Chaos they go for – there’s four Chaos Powers, each with their own brand of Demons. Last time it centred on Khorne’s Bloodthirsters and similar. Maybe Slannesh, Tzeench or Nurgle will get a bit of play this time? Hell, we’d like to see all four properly detailed.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: Casually bring up that you’re actually into the Fifth Chaos Power, Malal…
Odds: 2/1


THE ELDAR
They are? Space Elves, with a few twists – they’re a fallen race who had too many good parties, and accidentally birthed the Chaos God of Fuck, Slannesh. Whenever an Eldar dies, Slannesh consumes their soul in the warp, which the Eldar generally consider a Bad Thing. They now trap their souls in gems, and store them in the enormous ships they travel the galaxy in, one day dreaming of having enough souls so they can release them all at once and create a God who’ll be able to maintain itself and not be gobbled up by Slannesh. Since their ships keep on getting blown up, they haven’t got a chance in hell of this working. Completely doomed, bless ‘em. In the standard “Starcraft ripped off 40k argument”, people say they’re what the Protoss are. This is, frankly, a bit of a reach.
What are their chances? Well, they were one of the initial four races in Dawn of War. However, while a relatively subtle race which rewards expert play, they don’t actually seem that popular. From Dawn of Wars four races, I’d say the Eldar were the ones most likely to be swapped for something new. But then again, I’ve always hated the Elves of all varieties.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: “Worked out the secret of the Laughing God yet? He’s the C’tan Deciever. No, think about it”. This is even more indecipherable than the Tyranid conspiracy theory. If someone even vaguely understands what you’re talking about, they’re a big dirty geek. Either bait them or befriend them according to your nature. They will know a lot about hit modifiers.
Odds: 6/1


THE IMPERIAL GUARD
They are? The Imperium’s Army. Basic soldiers in Space. As regularly savaged as you’d imagine a normal human would be in a combat zone where the average inhabitant is over seven foot tall and has swapped their hands for chainsaws. Luckily, they have big tanks.
What are their chances? Reasonable… ish. They were the first expansion pack last time. If Relic want to balance the four races half Imperium and half enemies of the imperium, they’re the strongest non-Space Marine race. It kind of depends whether they actually want to do that, obv.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: Mention that the original Imperial Guard list didn’t actually have any tanks. They came later. A lot later. In fact, some heavily beaten Imperial Guards veteran commander like yours truly may say, much too late.
Odds: 5/1


NECRON
They are? Robot undead from the beginning of time. Cthullu meets the Terminator, with a splash of an Egyptian Influence. A latter-day addition to the 40k world, but a fairly popular one. Also, vibrant use of bright green. It’s a genuine fashion risk, but they pull it off with style.
What are their chances? Probably an outsider, alas, because their Dark Crusade Incarnation was really neat. If they don’t go for the Tyranids (and – were I to guess – Guards) for the Expansion pack, the Necron would be a strong choice for the second race.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: “When the Void Dragon wakes up, the Imperium is completely screwed. I mean, without the Adeptus Mechanicus, the whole thing falls apart” This means nothing to you, but will mean something to them.
Odds: 6/1


THE TAU EMPIRE
They are?Zen-fascists with zap-guns. Kind of the mirror of the Necron – while they came from the beginning of time, these are a young, optimistic race who have yet to realise that they’re just a speck in an infinite, uncaring cosmos. Frankly, I look forward to the day, because they’re an uppity bunch of dipshits.
What are their chances? Even more of an outsider than the Necron, unless they get swapped in place of the Eldar. With their fancy mech-suits and railguns and similar, they’re a ranged-focused army – if the main three are Orks, Marines and Chaos, they do add tactical variety in a way that the Necron wouldn’t.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: Note that it’s a bit sinister that many Tau fans seem to take the Greater Good thing without any irony. It’s a society based on mind-control, a strict-caste system and (arguably) genocide-by-sterilisation. Just because they wear pastels and don’t want to eat you and poop you out as a chitinous thing with exciting mandibles doesn’t make them Good guys, y’know.
Odds: 7/1


DARK ELDAR
They are? As Jim put it in his recent review of Soulstorm: “The normal Eldar might be a bit emo, but they’ve got some class. The Deldar are awkward pubescent posers, like they did Chaos but didn’t inhale.” They’re mainly notable to me for their plan to avoid being eaten by Slannesh when they die – they figure they should worship him and feed him so many souls they’ll leave them alone. This is about as well thought out a plan as the normal Eldar’s.
What are their chances? It took three expansions to get to them last time. I don’t see it being any different this time around. And, I suspect, the general critical shrug surrounding Soulstorm won’t help their cause.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: I’d just quote Jim’s “they did try Chaos but didn’t inhale” line.
Odds: 10/1


THE SISTERS OF BATTLE
They are? Warrior Nuns with Flamethrowers.
What are their chances? Probably even less than the Deldar. They were generally dismissed as bosomy Space Marines, and Soulstorm’s rep won’t help them either.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: They’re mainly notable for how they came into being. The Imperium’s Ecclesiastic branch wasn’t allowed soldiers, for various reasons. However, the rule said something like “No man shall serve the Ecllesiastic People”. At which point one person noted it didn’t say anything about women. Instead of telling them to fuck off, the High Lords of Terra let it slide. This is another classic example of people in the 40k universe not thinking through things properly.
Odds: 15-1


THE SISTERS OF MERCY
They are? An old goth Band featuring Andrew Eldritch, Drum-machine Doktor Avalanche and whoever he says so. Actually a bit awesome, on the quiet.
What are their chances? Something of a dark horse.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: Did you know Andrew Eldritch is into interactive fiction?
Odds:1000/1


SQUATS
They are? Dwarfs… in… SPACE!!!!
What are their chances? About as outside as they get. While existing in early 40k lore, were written out when – basically – it was decided they were a bit rubbish. They were human miners stuck on high-gravity worlds for a long time, and ended up being shorter and having their own culture around ancestor worship. Hmm… they were a bit rubbish. Their most inspired section was their Biker-units, who were clearly hells-angels with Bolters.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: “Have you noticed that any time Games Workshop wants to get rid of a bit of the background, they have the Tyranid eat it and poop it out as a chitinous thing with exciting mandibles? The Squats… the Zoats. They’re less an alien race, more the office paper-shredder.”
Odds: 100,000/1


THE DEMIURG
They are? Dwarfs… in… SPACE!!! Prt 2
What are their chances?Minimal. They’re space-dwelling traders who dwell in exoskeletons, a bit like Kosh in Babylon Five. Or, at least, I think they do – the Demiurg are right at the periphery of the 40k mythos, and little is known about them. It’s just about possible that GW may want to introduce a race properly in Dawn of War, feeding it into the minds of millions of Gamers… but it’s a tad unlikely. But still more likely than the Squats.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: They’re responsible for actually selling the Tau their Ion Cannon tech. So it’s THEIR fault.
Odds: 10,000/1


VERMINTHICULIANS
They are? Okay – this is an interesting one. There’s all sorts of creatures and races buried in 40k’s voluminous lore, but in the recently published Dark Heresy 40K RPG there was a box-out describing the main alien threats to the Imperium. All the usual ones are rolled out – Eldar, Tau, The French. But buried in the list are the “Verminthiculians”, described as “Wild Mercenaries and Reavers”. Now, the name would imply that this may the start of an attempt to bring something akin to Warhammer Fantasy’s Skaven - chaos rats, and probably my favourite race in the Fantasy game – into 40k. Now, it could be dismissed as just another name for the Hrud, another 40k background race, who are traditionally described in a short-hand fashion as the equivalent to the Skaven… except the Hrud are also on the list. This is something different. Could they use Dawn of War 2 to introduce it to the world?
What are their chances? No, probably not. But there’s more chance of it than the Squats coming back.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: Mentioning them will do the trick. There’s only two google hits on them right now, and one of them is me talking about ‘em over on QuarterToThree.
Odds: 20,000/1


JOKAERO
They are? Orangutans. Orangutans with the ability to assembled hyperadvanced technology from what’s lying around – like a more Simian McGuyver – but Orangutans, nevertheless.
What are their chances? Still more likely than the Squats. While they’ve been kind of buried in the mythos since they appeared in the first edition, at least they haven’t been pooped out as a chitinous thing with exciting mandibles.
Random Thing to Say to 40k fans about them: Er… Orangutans, eh?
Odds: 50,000/1

What do I think? Marines, Chaos, Orkz and Tyranid.

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73 Comments »

  1. Josh says:

    Well, Orks & SM have already been announced in the press release, so the odds for those two are 1/1. :)

    I’d pretty much agree w/ your picks on the initial 4 races. After all the talk about pushing tyranids back until the engine could support it, I can’t see relic stringing the fans along until 2010 and the 1st DoW2 expansion.

  2. Faraday says:

    Marines and Orkz are deffo in. I don’t think Tyranids will be playable, but maybe they’ll make an appearance. My other two guesses would be Chaos and the Imperial Guard, but who says there has to four?

    It would be neat if every faction had a Company of Heroes type doctrine thing. So for example the Space Marines had Blood Ravens, Space Wolves and Galactic Jaguar or whatever, each with their different skills and units as described in the 40k mythos.

  3. po says:

    I think they should just open it up for modding, so anything can be added (and have a good enough stats system to help with the balancing).

    The mod community needs a good RTS engine to play with.

  4. KBKarma says:

    I understood all of those random things. Just because I read the fluff on Wiki.

    Orks and Space Marines are definites. Tyranids are a large possibility. Necrons are great fun, so they’re another good bet. The Guard would be great, and are another large possibility. The Tau are bordering on possible. The rest are rather nebulous, especially these Verminthiculians. Squats, however, are dead dead dead, and may Chaos chew on their souls.

    Seperate Chapters for Marines might be fun. Ultramarines and Space Wolves. Different powers for Chaos would be good too. I’ve always liked the name Nurgle (sort-of) since I first played Bloodbowl.

    However, would they do the same for the rest? Cadian Shock Trooper and Tanith’s First-And-Only for Guards? The Kult of Speed and Goffs for Orks?

    Then again… why not all of the races? If you include the Dark Eldar and the Inquisition, and assume Tyranids are in it, then you have a respectable ten races, each with specific methods.

    Space Marines: Marines backed up by tanks.
    Orks: Rush with infantry. No other tactics required.
    Eldar: Every person in their place.
    Tau: Stand back, and let ‘er rip!
    Chaos: Same as Marines, but with the addition of Warp-spawned monstrosities.
    Imperial Guards: Hold the line, and let the big guns do the work.
    Necrons: Get to the enemy very slowly, then destroy them with undead robots and the Monolith.
    Tyranids: ZERG RUSH!!!
    Inquisition: … I have no idea. Probably specialised units like Eldar.
    Dark Eldar: Again. I’ve not played Soulstorm.

    By the way, Warcraft, apparently, was going to be the game of Warhammer, but GW pulled out at the last moment. Poor shmucks.

    EDIT: Lists don’t work, it seems.

  5. Ging says:

    As I said over on QuarterToThree – give me chaos marines with guitars! Noise Marines all the way!

    If they do go down the route of having CoH doctrine esque choices for each of the races than I’d best be seeing me some Eldar soul eating Slaanesh in there (mainly so my army colour choice of pink and electric blue are valid and “canon”).

    I’d like to see Tyranids as a core race, probably along with the Guard (or is that just too much Imperium for the starting set?) – Then you’ve got two “heavy” races (SM and Nids) and two “light” races (IG and Orks).

    But at the same time, I do love me the Necrons – there’s something so delightfully, inexorable, about them.

  6. Anthony Damiani says:

    About the Greater Good thing– the Tau only WORK if you take the Greater good unironically. It’s the thing about every 40k race that you can argue they’re the biggest and most awesome army in the universe. In order to work, you have to be able to look at them and say “my army is the best, because….”

    They need at least one fragile shooty army. The question is whether they go with the fast variant or the IG variant.

    The tyranid? A macrovirus– an unstoppable plague, they will conquer the universe if they have to die at a thousand to one. Space Marines? The most badass guys with the most badass gear. The Necrons? Unstoppable, implacable walking death. Chaos? Ia, Ia, Slanesh F’taghn!

    The Tau’s thing is that they challenge the existential underpinings of the setting– that there could be something more than war. At the very least, they’re a multiracial coalition, which seems pretty much anathema to all the other factions. Tau players gravitate towards them, in large part, because they’d like SOME measure of hope in this dark abyss of a setting.

    Now, it’s 40k, so they leave open the possibility that they’re creepy communist bastards, and probably the pawns of one of the less pleasant gods. If they’re wrong, it will eventually be really funny to watch them get splattered like bugs against the metaphorical windshields of the cosmos– but I think the possibility of the alternative has to be there.

    Also why there’s no way in hell they’re getting in the core.

    Obviously, Humans and Orcs are confirmed. Tyrannids are an iffy question– I kind of expect them because they were so emphatic about needing a new engine to do them justice. On the other hand, just HOW head-to-head do they want to compete with SC2?

    Personally, I think Chaos has a pretty weak claim to inclusion here– they don’t play all that much different from the core SM. Theme wise, they’d be a great fit– but Orkz, SM, and Chaos gives you three medium-mobility “tough guy” armies that want to run in and beat the crap out of you.

    Assuming there are four slots, one of them will be filled with an army that is either shooty or mobile. Tau, Eldar and Deldar do both, and IG does the former but not the latter.

    Really not sure on this.

    (Also…. “Of COURSE! The Deceiver! It all makes so much sense….”)

  7. KBKarma says:

    That thing about Tau is a good point that I forgot to add. I once asked someone who the good guys in 40k were. Their response was “The Tau are… close.”

    I’ve, personally, always viewed them as suspect. I mean, “join or die” doesn’t sound like the most polite way to form a coalition.

    Personally, I’ve always gravitated towards Orks. Just for their sheer madness and wanton abandon. Their shootas work because they think they will. Their idea of good medical practise is to saw off one of the patient’s arms and replace it with an ‘eavy shoota (“For more dakka!”). Their currency is teeth (teef), their own most of the time.

    The rest seem to strait-laced and poe-faced. They’re all trying to change the future, to take control. The Orks are a breath of fresh air. They don’t care about the future. All there is for them, now and always, is war. They’re the most optimistic of races, imo, since they don’t care about politics or others. They don’t know who will be around tomorrow or in the future.

    All they know is, when the future comes, da Boyz’ll be fightin’, da booze’ll be flowin’, and da Orks’ll be havin’ a right laugh!

  8. Kieron Gillen says:

    Press-release: Man, how did I miss that?

    Faraday: You may note that I didn’t necessarily say you had to pick four. Deliberate! Though I did include some analysis around assuming they may do it.

    (To be honest, my guess would be more likely to have less factions than more. There’s not many RTS that have 4 novel factions. I suspect they’ll go for 4 though, if only because it’s what people’s expections are. If they do more, I’ll be amazed and impressed.)

    Re: Orks. I’ve always admired how well adjusted the Orks are mentally. For everyone else, the 41st millennia is Hell. But Orks, it’s heaven.

    KG

  9. Therlun says:

    Nerd stuff:
    The Tau etherals (the mind control guys) were created by the Eldar to form a race that is not influenced by chaos.

  10. Noc says:

    On the Tau: everything about their society has vaguely sinister undertones. Especially considering their origins:

    Something big protects them for a few millenia, and pow! They immediately start evolving rapidly into a civilization custom-built to be an enormously effective military-industrial machine, and then the Ethereals come out of nowhere, unite them in a day and a half, and start conquering the galaxy. Their Greater Good thing is a form of fascist hypersocialism, and they’ve a record of genocide against worlds which refuse to join them willingly.

    The difference is that they’re the only faction in the 40k universe that has an effective PR system. Unless you count the Inquisition. I like them, personally. Since they’ve got a focus on tactics instead of over-the-top macho brutality. And aren’t faggoty like the Eldar.

    I’d like to see them in DoW2 (maybe with a little more mobility, please? Devilfish that work properly?), but I don’t think I see it happening. My money’s on Space Marines, Orks (or is it “Orkz?”), the Imperial Guard, and the Tyrranids.

    [Edit:
    If the Eldar could do that, they'd just park their worldships in the Tau cluster and not keep getting them blown up every time someone sneezes.]

  11. Saskwach says:

    Here’s one 40k fan giving you a rise.
    “Worked out the secret of the Tyranids? They’re the final weapon of the Old Ones, released when the Necron re-emerged, in a final attempt to get rid of them. Think about it – in which direction did the Old Ones disappear? Which direction are the Tyranid coming from? And who makes biological weapons? And what’s the most impressive Biological weapon in the 40k universe?” This will mean nothing to anyone but the hardest core 40kite, but in them will probably induce excited babbling.
    I’m not saying the Old Ones did do this but if they did then they’re seriously off their game since the Necrons sent them packing. [fluff]Tyranid hive fleets unneringly avoid any Necron tomb world.[/fluff] They could have been a failed experiment of the OOs that broke free, though.
    “When the Void Dragon wakes up, the Imperium is completely screwed. I mean, without the Adeptus Mechanicus, the whole thing falls apart” This means nothing to you, but will mean something to them.
    Careful there, you’ll set off a flame war. I’ve seen one of these and they aren’t pretty. For my money you’re totally right though. The machines might still work but without the ability to repair or mass produce them the Empire is just dead. This is why I hate the Necrons; GW can’t move the story on in a realistic way (ie, bringing out the Void Bringer and killing everyone some time soon) because of the Necrons. They’re stuck in a rut. This problem is also becoming clear for the Tyranids. They’re so killy that only a deus ex machina can save the Imperium from the Nids’ slow advance.

  12. TychoCelchuuu says:

    My guess for the races is Verminthiculians, Terrans, Cybrans, Americans, Hiigarans, and Space Marines. Which Space Marine chapter? Iron Han(d)s.

  13. malkav11 says:

    I’m guessing it’ll be Space Marines (there’s only ever been one 40K game that I know of where the players didn’t play Space Marines, and they were still a faction. That being Rites of War.), and either Orkz or Chaos. Maaaybe both. Four races up front might be a bit much to do, especially if they do proper damned campaigns for the factions this time around (they never did do one for anybody except Space Marines. Winter Assault’s generalist campaigns don’t really count.).

    Tyranids are pretty much guaranteed at some point or there will be all kinds of backlash, but I don’t see them as a first release race. They’re a little too weird.

    And for what it’s worth, the Tau may be “Join us or die!”, but the Imperials are “Die!”.

  14. Down Rodeo says:

    Aw, memories. I’ll probably have to get myself DoW. But since they have a fair amount of the groundwork done (obviously the models will have to polyed-up and other such nonsense) but they will at least be familiar with the content. So maybe they will jump in with more races. I’d like to see that :)

  15. Dagda says:

    The Deciever? Pshaw! We’re clearly dealing with Tzeentch, here.

    (The funny thing is that I understood every word of this article without ever having played a game of 40k. 4chan’s /tg/ board is discussing/joking about 40k about half the time, you pick alot of things up.)

  16. Lh'owon says:

    …pooped out as a chitinous thing with exciting mandibles.

    Luckily I enjoy reading that as much as you enjoy writing it. :D

  17. Mitch Small says:

    Coolest. Freakin’. Lore. Ever. Period.

    Dagda and I are in the same boat, too. I’ve read a couple codexes and bits of the rulebook, but I’ve never played a stitch of 40k or Fantasy Battles.

  18. Devin says:

    Now that you’ve brought up the Jokaero… Remember Jokaero digi-lasers? Those fancy sets of Andrew-Eldritch-style rings you could wear that would just kind of zap anyone who came too close, thus assuring you of sufficient space on the dance floor to really get into Andrew Eldritch?

    The Imperium thought they were such a good idea that they made a fanny-pack version for Titans.

    Yes, that’s right. There’s a device you can slap on the ass of your Warlord that will lazer blast anyone who comes too close in your rear arc.

    My guess is that a senior tech-priest was unwittingly exposed to hentai featuring the Chaos-corrupted Warlord variant with the barbed gun-tail before designing this thing.

  19. HC says:

    Saskwach – fortunately, the Empire has its very own deus who has, conveniently enough, been sitting in his personal machina for millenia. Now all they need is to figure out how to persuade him to get ex and go for a walk.

  20. Okami says:

    @Kieron: Skaven are your favorite Warhammer Fantasy race? You, sir, are obviously a very fine gentleman of high breed with very distinguished tastes. May I applaud you?

    (I’ve got a truckload of Skaven minis hidden away in my basement. I’ll allways remember the day that I first kissed a girl, because that was also the day I bought the first Warhammer Armies – Skaven book. This book has been a faithfull companion of mine for many many years, giving me untold hours of comfort and joy. As opposed to the girl who dumped me because I was too childish. Well, fuck her, I say. )

    I’d also very much love to see The Sisters of Mercy as a playable race in Dawn of War. After you’ve unlocked their Eldritch powers at the Temple of Love and built Detonation Boulevard you could teach all those other races what it means to be Under The Gun.

    Of course, there would allways be the danger, that part of your army would split up to form The Sisterhood and go on a Mission.

    (Yeahh.. that one was really bad..)

  21. OUCH says:

    Space Marines get their dicks cut off? Ouch!

  22. matt says:

    My guess would be Space Marines, Chaos, Orkz and.. a fourth race that i truly hope would be Tyranids; but somehow, i kind of think they might go for the same races that they had in DoW. So the fourth race would be Eldars, kind of fits, though it’d be a little lame to start off with the same races in DoW2, it does not seem that far stretched.
    Somehow, i’m thinking they might go for more than 4 race.. i’d be surprised and impressed, but if you think about it, with DoW 1 and it’s expansion packs, it’s around 9 playable races so far, and some remain to be introduced and played, so they do have the potential to include more than 4 races.
    Let’s hope we get some insight some time soon !

  23. Kharne the Betrayer says:

    Blood for the blood God! MAIM, KILL, BURN!

  24. moromete says:

    My money is on the following:

    1) First game – Space Marines, Chaos, Imperial Guard, Orkz, With a special appearance by the Tyranids at the end of the respective campaigns and maybe some other special appearances here and there.

    2) First expansion – Tyranids, Eldar, Tau, Necron

    3) Third Expansion – ??? Tau, Necron is they don’t make it in the second one.

  25. Him says:

    Jokaero! F*ck yeah!
    That’s probably the most succinct and hillarious round up of 40k armies that I’ve read. So much so that DoW2 may garner a serious stare or two when it comes out.
    Also; outside vote for an Inquisitorial Kill Team!

  26. Lu-Tze says:

    Daemon Hunters get my vote.
    Witch Hunters for Vice President.

  27. kalain says:

    I’m not bothered about what races, but what other units they are going to add. For instance:

    Space Marines: Veteran Units, Honour guard

    Eldar: More Aspects: Swooping HAwks, Striking Scorpions..

    Imperial Guards: Stormtroopers

    Chaos: God specific units

    I think additional units would help spice things up a bit.

  28. Okami says:

    I hope they bring back Final Liberation’s Cutscens.

    That would be sooo awesome!

  29. phuzz says:

    Meh, if it wasn’t in the edition I played (second I think) then they don’t count, so that rules out Necron, Sisters of Mercy/battle, and these Tau jesters.
    What I want to see is Marines, IG and Squats vs various flavours of Chaos and of course some orks.
    Oh, and Titans, lots of Titans :)

    Plus all this 40k is taking me back, I actually own one of those Squats (2nd from the right)…mmm lead and paint

  30. dartt says:

    This news post / comments thread is full of waaaaaaagh!

  31. roBurky says:

    I want an Adeptus Mechanicus Skitarii Tech-Guard army, because GW clearly aren’t going to do it for the table-top any time soon.

  32. Seniath says:

    I’d love to see the Necrons again, as they are my favourite race, both in terms of gameplay and lore. Plus, green lasers ftw.

    Again, I’ve played maybe two tabletop games of W40k in my life. Did own Space Crusade as a kid, but was too young to really understand what was going on. Everything I know about Warhammer I learnt from Wikipedia, and I still understood 90% of what was written above :D.

  33. Saskwach says:

    HC- you’re absolutely right. I was thinking of making a reference to the Emperor. Still the reason the Emperor isn’t woken up is the same reason the Void Bringer isn’t. It’d be a bit crappy if the Emperor got off his Golden Throne with an enormous hangover and asked the Astropathic Choir what the hell was going on. And then proceeded to kick every lousy heretic, daemon and alien ass in the galaxy.

  34. Stew says:

    The Tau are just fascist Eldar wannabes, and have no place in 40K. Certainly not in the DoW core.

    Then again, it looks like I’m the only one here who actually liked the Eldar in DoW.

  35. C0nt1nu1ty says:

    main races of course (space marine, chaos, ork, eldar, imperial guard (probably)). Other than that….dark eldar are a no-no (there a bit rubbish) Tao and Necrons maybe. As for the whole “Tyrannids are unplayable” thing we’ve already established that the Zerg are them, the zerg work :-P.

    I think there is going to be more work on expanding the current races like sub race stuff (space wolves etc). Also something i’d love to see but will never happen is an inter-planet campaign map with battlefleet gothic ships to skermish/cart stuff about etc

  36. groovychainsaw says:

    Maybe just orks and space marines, but much more depth to each race, maybe differing ‘talent’ trees where you could develop different gorup of space marines with more individuality, likewise, go down fifferent routes for different groups of orkz, (mechanized, mobs etc.)

  37. Beefeater says:

    Marines, Orks, Chaos, and…it would be great to have Tyranids if only to see the first digitised genestealers since Space Hulk, but we’ll see.

    From your lore list: Kieron, how could you miss out catachan face-eaters (the faceflannel creatures) and Psychenuin wasps? I know you’ve got the Rogue Trader rulebook somewhere. Those are two nasty little bits of lore I still remember from reading it as a teenager back in the ’90s.

  38. RK says:

    The Laughing God is not the Deceiver. The Laughing God is a warp-based entity like all Eldar and Chaos Gods while the Deceiver is a C’Tan and thus highly vulnerable to the warp.

  39. phuzz says:

    Best line I remember from 40k lore:
    “Birmingham AKA the black planet.”

  40. Radiant says:

    Holy moly.

    Imagine you’re sitting in a pub.
    There’s one guy who you don’t really know but he’s a friend of a friend and he cracks some funny jokes and you think “This guy’s alright you know…”

    Then in a quiet moment he says “What do you think about sexy fat women?”

    That’s what this article represents.

    PC gamers are worrying as fuck!

  41. Kieron Gillen says:

    Noc: Yeah. They have PR. See – CLEARLY evil.

    RK: Yeah, but are you SURE. Look at the similarities in the histories which… oh, nevermind. I did say it was conspiracy theories.

    Dagda: I always liked the Tzeench idea too. Well… perhaps I like the idea of Eldar being fucked even more than they already are. File alongside The Khaine-as-splinter-of-Khorne.

    Saskwach: Ah yes – Hive Fleets avoiding Tomb World’s an interesting one. My addition to the theory was that they want to eat everything else first before actually fighting them – in other words, absorb all the genetic material ever so they have the best chance against them. The Old Ones, after all, know this is their last chance…

    But yes, conspiracy theories! But a fun one…

    (Regarding the destablisation of the Empire Re: Void Dragon – that’s actually one reason why I’m quite fond of the Tyranid/Old Ones theory – while it’s an enormous Epic reveal, it doesn’t actually change the status quo of the universe.

    And they only really need one machine to fall apart to screw the Empire: The Golden Throne. Without that, the whole thing crumbles.)

    HC: I almost did the Sensei as one of the lower down obscure factions. The Illumanti’s old plan to raise the Emperor was as ill-thought out as any the Eldar has come up with.

    Beefeater: I was going to do the Ambull, but I’d already been writing it for over two hours. I could have gone on all day…

    Radiant: This PC Gamer is. This stuff just sits in your head. It never goes away. And don’t worry – Walker finds this all as bemusing as you do.

    KG

  42. KBKarma says:

    “PC gamers are worrying as fuck!”
    Wait… You’re NOT a PC gamer?

    Boys, we have a spy in our midst! :o

    I believe you meant wargamers.

  43. RK says:

    I’ve always interpreted the Machine God as what the adeptus mechanicus thinks makes machines works. Think of Arthur C. Clarke talking about how any sufficiently advance technology looks like magic. They have no idea how anything works, the only way they know how to build most items comes from STC plans and further development is regarded as heretical. So the Void Dragon waking would not have any direct effect on technological workings in the Imperium. However a C’Tan appearing on Mars and being right next to Terra would present several problems for the imperials and would also prompt a civil war inside the cult of the machine god. Looking back over what I’ve just wrote I realize I have way too much useless knowledge in my head.

  44. Kieron Gillen says:

    RK: It’s more that the Adeptus worship him and only they know how to follow the STC plans and similar. Since there will be at least a schism in the Adeptus if their “god” rose, it makes it more likely – say – no-one will be fixing the Golden Throne. Or, even worse, the only people who know how to fix it could easily be a traitor.

    A C’Tan on Mars is just the kicker.

    KG

  45. VisCount says:

    Another question is; which Guard regiment?
    They did about 10 sets of minis, all different styles and all with back stories.
    We’ve had the Cadian shock troopers under another name – will we see these generic troopers again, or might we get the Mordrian Iron Guard, the Catchan Jungle fighters (very likely if Tyranids are involved) the Death Korps of Kreig, the Valhallans, the Tallarn Desert Raiders etc etc

    Edit:Catchan kill teams… elite rambo units for jungle bug hunting. Surely we need to see them…

  46. Jonathan says:

    Well the Imperial Guard and Eldars are my favourite to play. But neither looks too likely.

    But I’m more interested in how they usually add a new race. Do they just appear in a rule book? Do they release a big starter pack? Either way an exclusive reveal in one the biggest, as well as best selling, strategy games would really boost the profile. So in the light of that and GW trying to turn the Verminthiculians into a threat I’d put them, or any new race, at a tentative 100:1. Bear in mind DOW2 is probably at least a year or two away and that’s enough time to put them in a few of stories and lore.

    Still I admit I wouldn’t put money on it but it would be a neat twist on the in game advertising front a sort “Be the first to experience the…. the brand new race from the 40K Universe!!!” then they’d sell the starter packs with a big Dawn of War logo.

    But whatever happens I hope and pray that they go for asymmetry instead Company of Heroes’ “almost the same, but different”.

  47. Homunculus says:

    It never, ever goes away.

    THE THYRUSS

    They are? A bizarre, colourful squid-like race with gaudy, bulbous, translucent craniums who perceive their entire existence as a play for the benefit of a nebulous observer. Consequently, their prosecution of warfare is the cause of much hair-pulling for Imperial senior military figures who are unable to discern any strategic value to their assaults.

    What are their chances? Next to nothing. Probably more at home within the pages of an Iain M. Banks novel than the ol’ Grim ‘n’ Dark. Or as Imperial propaganda has it, “KNOW YOUR ENEMY! THYRUSS WARRIOR: degenerate slime coated scum! Slow-moving, inefficient, physically stunted and barely sentient – a poor challenger to mankind’s destiny! GIVE THE SQUIDDIES NO QUARTER.”

    Random thing to say to 40k fans about them: “A race dedicated solely to the indulgence of art? I can think of nothing more ludicrous or detestable!”

  48. Shanucore says:

    Re. Squats: c’mon, guys, LAND TRAIN. Fuck Titans, LAND TRAIN.

  49. Okami says:

    Does the whole Sensai/Illuminati background still fit in with official WH40K canon though? Only source I remember mentioning them was the old “Realms of Chaos” books. And that was a gazillion years ago.

    Also: I think waking the Emperor from his 10.000 year slumber would be a great idea.

  50. Jody Macgregor says:

    “Chaos god of fuck”

    That’s the best description ever. I wish they’d let us be that succinct in the RPG.