Rock, Paper, Shotgun

Neopets Puzzle Adventure – No, Come Back!

By John Walker on June 6th, 2008 at 10:03 pm.

CUTESY!

In case anyone’s wondering how to get a story on RPS, it’s all about jumping up and down and demanding. Eurogamer‘s Tom Bramwell has executed this with grace and finesse, and thus I’m forced to write about the forthcoming Neopets Puzzle Adventure.

It’s the sort of name your eyes glide right past when scanning a list of press releases. The idea of Neopets fills me with a sense of horror (other than reminding me of the happy time I fed my little sister’s Tamagotchi until it died of fullness). But the key words here are, “From the people who made Puzzle Quest, Infinite Interactive.”

They're clearly encouraging young people to steal from shops.

Tom’s excitement is borne of his time spent playing some early code of the game, while on some corrupting trip to Vegas. At Capcom’s Captivate… WAIT A SECOND! I came up with that name! Senior PR bod at Capcom, Leo Tan, asked me what they should call it. I said that! It’s my name! I thought it was funny because it would wind up Activision with their Activate event. Someone owes me an absolute fortune. Flipping heck. And then Tan didn’t even invite me. I’m so mad. What was I talking about?

Oh yes, NeoQuest Puzzle Pets. There’s no point in messing too much with a winning formula, and as other copycats (LIKE LEO TAN AND CAPCOM) try and churn out embarrassing copies of the PQ format, Infinite are the right people to know what changes to make. So this time, rather than Match 3, it’s Othello. You know, Turnabout. Go for people who find Go way too hard. This game core is surrounded by spells and abilities, this time presumably based in the Neopets universe.

The legendary STEVE!

Wait a second. Look, I’ve found the chat log with Leo! Here are the ideas I had:

botherer: Capcomvention.
botherer: I’m a genius.
botherer: Capcommunism.
botherer: Captivate would be hilarious.

How do you sue people? I’m sure this is the sort of situation where you sue people.

So, Neopets Puzzle Adventure has three Lands of Neopia, and over 150 puzzles, pet collecting, and you can make much more sense of it by reading Tom’s article. Meanwhile, hooray! These people know what they’re doing, and they’re doing it again.

Man! Seriously! My idea!

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17 Comments »

  1. The_B says:

    Would I be castrated if I admitted I used to regularly play neopets, back in the day?

    The day being my pre teen years eight years ago, but still…

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  2. I too was once a neo-petian many many years ago…well they say the first step to recovery is to admit to it.

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  3. Acosta says:

    Leo will appreciate the promotion you just gave him. You should know better John.

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  4. Tom Bramwell says:

    Leo’s a cunt. Death to Leo. (Hi Leo!)

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  5. Is there any limit to Leo’s evil?

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  6. The_B says:

    Leo ate my hamster!

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  7. Verdugo says:

    Leo killed my dog D;

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  8. Lucky says:

    I was going to type a comment about my relationship with Neopets, but then I got distracted by that vaguely foxlike Petpet on the second screenshot. What the heck is it called!?

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  9. Vollgassen says:

    it’s called a fox

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  10. For a moment there when i read the article title i thought it was some kind online simulation of the old neo pets where you would have to feed them play with them etc etc

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  11. Al3xand3r says:

    Meh, developer means nothing to me when it’s just a shoddy licence based game… I’m waiting for their Galactrix instead.

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  12. Robin says:

    Isn’t NeoPets some murky Scientologist front, or have I been reading too much Encyclopedia Dramatica again?

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  13. Rook says:

    I was listening to 1up Yours and just about to post the same thing.

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  14. Leo Tan says:

    Everyone in this thread will die by my hand.

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  15. Atasco says:

    foxlike Neopet: Xweetok. You haven’t been there in a while, have you?
    Scientology: Heavens no. In Walmart maybe? WELL.
    Kindredphantom: you spelled it wrong, and yes it is.
    The_B: I’m sorry.
    Great Evans: it’s neopian.
    Leo: RAPED BILLIONS. Yeah.

    As if anybody even needs to know.

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  16. liss says:

    I don’t think so. Im going to be 24 next month and i still play neopets here and there. I just found out today that there used to be a unicorn color for the pets now i wanna see one but i have no clue how to find one.:(

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