Rock, Paper, Shotgun

Human Race To Face Fascist Alien Future

By Kieron Gillen on September 12th, 2008 at 11:50 am.

As someone who’s been enjoying the mass fear of annihilation from microscopic black holes – it makes a change from the usual forms of human paranoia, y’know – this caught my fancy. We report Shacknews reporting Popgive noticing a familiar face at CERN.

Erk.

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53 Comments »

  1. Let’s just hope they don’t have a little trolley with a yellow blob in it.

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  2. Nimic says:

    That. Is. Awesome.

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  3. Ian says:

    Still, as long as we all have crowbars with us…

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  4. Theory says:

    I hope there are some gamers at CERN. They could do a great April fool’s gag with this guy. :)

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  5. 357SIG says:

    what they don’t show is the bullsquid he’s staring down

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  6. phuzz says:

    resisting, urge, to, point, out, unlikelyhood, of bad, things, being, caused, by, LHC
    Seriously, the LHC isn’t going to destroy the world, (that’ll be the top sekret facility under Nevada).

    failed.

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  7. The_B says:

    Put a moustache on the guy on the far left of the picture.

    Oh sh-

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  8. toni says:

    old hat. the scientists at CERN themselves are fans of world-end theories and making fun of themselves. there were reports of a bogus “black-hole-creation-button” glued to the LHC as well as signs saying “don’t feed the scientists”. blogs all over the world started giving out survival guides once the day comes. most mentioned self-defense item: crowbar

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  9. Naurgul says:

    Not again! D:

    I can’t even begin to count the amount of times I’ve seen this the past few days.

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  10. Yeah, should have linked to it a few days ago, but I’ve been out of it. CATCHING UP WITH RAPID POSTING.

    And anyone who reads another blog other than RPS is a traitor. SUPPORT THE REGIME.

    KG

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  11. phil says:

    Put him in a MIB suit, lose the glasses and beard and he’s the spit of G-Man..

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  12. Chaz says:

    How much is a train ticket to City 17?

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  13. Adam says:

    RPS is the only blog I read on a regular basis……and even with stumbleupon, this is the first time I’ve seen this hilarious picture. Thank you for the chuckles….

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  14. Beefeater says:

    In other news, respected Austrian scientist Dr. Albert Breen has been appointed to head the ‘son of CERN’ project.

    Ah sod it. As the world tips into an alien dimension I’ll probably be too busy playing WAR to notice. MMOs: not called cybercrack for nothing.

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  15. faelnor says:

    Man I so love that Cyriak chap.

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  16. scott says:

    OK, This looks NOTHING like Gordon Freeman. This is ridiculous, you guys… This is just like everybody telling me that I look “exactly like” [insert whatever person that has a beard, i.e. Jesus] just because I have a beard.

    This being CERN related, I thought the person who it looks like might be more interesting/relevant like the fictional Robert Langdon from the Dan Brown books

    Lame…

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  17. aldo says:

    OK, This looks NOTHING like Gordon Freeman. This is ridiculous, you guys… This is just like everybody telling me that I look “exactly like” [insert whatever person that has a beard, i.e. Jesus] just because I have a beard.

    That’s what they want You to think, Jesus.

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  18. Colthor says:

    But I don’t even own a crowbar ;_;

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  19. Korgan says:

    SO SLOOOOOOW. Really. I’ve been seeing this on imageboards for a week, I guess.

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  20. Whiskey Jack says:

    In the lines of jokes on CERN and everything…

    http://hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com/

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  21. HD says:

    Can’t be him, he isn’t flipping a switch or pushing a cart.

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  22. O.G.N says:

    Thanks to reddit Dr. Freeman should now be equipped for any eventuality.
    http://blog.reddit.com/2008/09/crowbar-headcrab-and-half-life-strategy.html

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  23. The Hammer says:

    Haha, I hadn’t seen this before.

    It’s great! And yeah, I agree with black holes being said to kill us all is quite refreshing to hear.

    Oh, and very nice to see some news stories about Half Life again! I’ve been considering reinstalling the God of FPSs, actually…

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  24. Rosti says:

    I’d like to urge people who need more giggles to have a peek at the HTML source of ‘Has the LHC destroyed the world yet?’.

    Rimshot on standby… : )

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  25. lgm493 says:

    Nah – it really would be scary if HE visits CERN:
    http://totallylookslike.com/2008/08/12/eric-clapton/

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  26. Malagate says:

    http://www.hasthelhcdestroyedtheearth.com/yes

    Also the G-Man photo provided by CannibalChris is almost uncanny, much closer than Gordon.

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  27. rei says:

    And anyone who reads another blog other than RPS is a traitor. SUPPORT THE REGIME.

    This is the first time I’ve seen this! When the End Days are upon us I hope to be rewarded for my loyalty.

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  28. Esha says:

    That’s particularly entertaining, I hadn’t seen it either. The chap does have Freeman’s features too, I have to say. And it goes beyond just the beard, he even has our good Scientist’s nose, which really makes the comparison stick.

    As far as the LHC goes, I’ve been finding it passingly amusing too, in the way that things like this are. In the way that Y2K was funny, and whatever else the rabble-roused masses are going on about today. Personally, I’m thinking that just about anyone today with an honest face and a well known enough blog could cook up a doomsday theory and make it stick, at least for a little while.

    If I had a well known blog, I might actually be tempted to test this theory, I’d even put some research into something that could be likely as well to give it that extra something that these scenarios usually don’t have. For example: Perhaps it’s time that strange matter was brought to the attention of the masses.

    Strange Matter Day – 2013 June 14th – The day our beloved Earth goes Sploot

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  29. A-Scale says:

    I’m sorry but Mr. Freeman does not have that Semitic of a nose.

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  30. Esha says:

    Really? It always looked like he did to me. Then again, that could just be down to my poor sight, which as described was never all that good. But I always did perceive Freeman as having a bit of a Roman nose.

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  31. A-Scale says:

    It is my opinion that Mr. Freeman has something between a normal nose and my nose- in that it bulges out slightly near the middle, and is thick but not incredibly long. The man pictures had a long, almost spear like nose.

    I do however think that it is almost certainly true that this individual played Half Life, and is enjoying one of the most awesome experiences possible- to look a bit like Gordon Freeman while doing theoretical physics. The bastard.

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  32. Fumarole says:

    Cascade Resonance here we come.

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  33. Smileyfax says:

    Now now, if he follows standard insertion procedures, everything will be fine.

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  34. Saflo says:

    “Everything seems to be in order…”

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  35. Stupoider says:

    We’re in safe hands.

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  36. Cargo Cult says:

    I need to use my Manchester University physics contacts to get Valve personages into CERN!

    Also, 3D panorama whatsit things from inside CERN, complete with ambient sounds. But no headcrabs. Yet.

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  37. AlexW says:

    “I don’t know how you can say that, although I will admit that the possibility of a stable microsingularity forming is extremely unlikely.”

    Esha: remember eon8 (or whatever it was called)?

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  38. Whiskey Jack says:

    Seriously though…. how long before we see a HL2 LHC Mod? That would be freakin’ awesome.

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  39. B Rad says:

    ^ yes that would be sweet!

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  40. Ronin08 says:

    ….
    *is looking around for the G-Man*

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  41. kadayi says:

    I for one welcome our new Combine Overlords ;)

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  42. Gap Gen says:

    I always wondered who that suit guy was who keeps staring into my office window, then disappearing.

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  43. Kommissar Nicko says:

    I’m telling you, people at CERN would never dream of witnessing a resonance cascade scenario, much less creating one.

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  44. oh shit! that’s the zombie of Buddy Hacket on the far left!

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  45. jackrabbit says:

    you know this shit has been done before anyway. there is still the chance to destroy the world but they won’t learn anything new. bastards.

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  46. Noc says:

    But you know, the right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world!

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  47. The Shed says:

    CannibalChris! That is not cool! Now it seriously looks like some kind of underground, under-CERN conspiracy.

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  48. Martin says:

    I don’t care if this is old to those of you who have an gigabit Internet connection hooked up to your spine – I’ve never seen it and I found it quite amusing.

    And shouting “Old!” is about as pointless as “First!” – no-one cares.

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