Red Alert 3: Does It Contain A Game As Well?

By John Walker on September 30th, 2008 at 11:10 am.

I wish this were really a 1980s cop show.

After we posted EA’s last Red Alert 3 video, featuring a dance remix of the various actors in the FMV, we commented that things were getting a little peculiar. We then received a cryptic email from someone within MTV telling us, “You haven’t seen anything yet…”

While the latest official video doesn’t quite reach the heights of the previous one, it does contain some extremely strange moments. This time it’s all about the boys.

Apart from the hammy titles and crappy music, what makes this compilation quite so peculiar is the introduction.

“Want to see more?” it asks, after a series of suggestive poses from the various ladies in the game. Goodness me, where are they taking this?

Or don't - it's your choice.

Oh, those teases. So what then?

What might it be?!

A bonus in the box? A secret surprise bit of information? A picture of Crush off of American Gladiators showing her boobies?

Someone should tell them about the Backspace key.

I see…

EA: You have officially gone mad. I applaud this.

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32 Comments »

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  1. Carra says:

    A boob in each hand, sounds good.

  2. Bobsy says:

    Oh yeah! Work it, boys! Woo woo!

    They’ve gone fucking potty. What the hell is going on?

  3. phuzz says:

    Whisky. Tango. Foxtrot.

  4. Feet says:

    They’re really pushing the whole our-FMVs-are-so-bad-it’s-kitsch-with-hawt-ladies-and-george-takei angle aren’t they?

  5. MasterBoo says:

    I found it odd that RPS didn’t mention this from a week ago: http://kotaku.com/5052818/command–conquer-red-alert-3-calls-out-starcraft

    Obviously EA taking potshots at Blizzard and Relic.

  6. Man Raised By Puffins says:

    What the hell is going on?

    A suitably trashy promotional campaign, presumably. Given the coverage it’s getting it seems to be working on at least some levels.

  7. Gap Gen says:

    This game is actually slightly creepy.

  8. Max says:

    I want this game badly. I never played a Red Alert game.

    D:

  9. Cyanide says:

    This game will be ultimate. Check out EA’s RA3 website, go to factions, and then check out the units.
    I’m in love with ‘stingray’.

  10. MeestaNob! says:

    If they get rid of the install limit stuff I’m pre-ordering.

    WITH MONEY EA.

    MONEY

  11. Shadowmancer says:

    Why does RPS hate red alert 3 with all its recent atricles on it, its going to be awesome just pre-oreded the premeir edition yesterday.

  12. Muzman says:

    If they came out with a box that was so very much in the movie mold that they put a little “May contain videogame” or some such sticker on it, I’d probably have to buy it.

  13. Steve says:

    If they remove the DRM crap I’d buy it. Otherwise this is one game I’ll simply have to miss on principle.
    I guess I could just watch the cutscenes on YouTube a few weeks after it comes out.

  14. Matt says:

    I can’t wait to see Tim Curry hamming it up hard as a fake Russian commander in what will surely be his finest role ever.

    Also, I imagine that all the time I spend playing as the Japanese will be spent shouting “TATSUUUUUUU…OOOOOO!”. This possibility excites me far too much.

    I’m with MeestaNob though. The OTTDRM has to go before the money leaves my wallet.

  15. Nimic says:

    I love games that know they’re crazy and revel in it.

  16. Ian says:

    That’s a quality ‘tache and no mistake.

  17. Lu-Tze says:

    So the message is… Buy the Premier edition! The extra £18 means you get to see the photoshoot of the hot ladies, which is the whole reason you bought the game!

    I’ll stick with the version that gives me the game (and the BEAR HELM).

  18. mike says:

    Any idea how much each of the actors get for all of this? Pryce and Curry have not reached Z-list yet, have they?

  19. Zeno says:

    I don’t give a shit about all the marketing, I’m buying this game for one reason and one reason alone:

    Transformers.

  20. wahwah says:

    you lost me at “it’s all about the boys”

  21. Fumarole says:

    They’ve certainly taken camp to a new level in gaming history.

  22. Pheonix K says:

    Are there demos yet? Or in-game videos? I’m just wondering if they’re putting half the effort into the game as they are these videos. If so, a pretty sweet game may be the result.

  23. Mattress says:

    PETER STORMARE!!!
    ALRIGHT!

  24. I.Steal.your.gun.be says:

    lol @ Mattress: strangely I also was excited when founding out he played in the game. :-p

    Will i buy the premier edition, probably I’m C&C addicted, will it be any good, probably not, it guess the multilayer will be fun but the single player will s*ck big time.

  25. Rei Onryou says:

    That just screamed “BUY THIS NOW” at me.

    “If you buy this, you’ll get a behind the scenes DVD. Sorry for making you think it’d include naked boobiez”.

    Now, where can I get that Premier Edition from? *cough*

  26. edosan says:

    I think the opening screenshot in this article is worthy of an eighties-era cop show.

    “J.K. Simmons as…ACKERMAN!”

    He’s a cop that doesn’t play be the rules, you know.

  27. Real Horrorshow says:

    Andrew Divoff = Win.

    Wishmaster ftw

  28. Gylfi says:

    Unbelievable. It’s Wing Commander IV all over again.
    Even tho the actual game is more of a nuisance for now, for some reason I love this blend of game and actual film, there’s some extremely positive outcome for all videogaming, methinks.

    But, uhm, where is Tia Carrere?

  29. Anonymous says:

    Curry? Takei?

    I wish I was better at RTSs.

  30. megaman says:

    Sorry, but I can’t see the reason for the premium edition yet. And what would I need an “exclusive item for Warhammer Online: Age of Reckoning (also available with the standard edition of C&C Red Alert 3)” for?

  31. Masked Dave says:

    Alternatively just go to skins.be and look up those ladies there.

    Now you don’t need to play the game for the rewards!