Rock, Paper, Shotgun

The Sunday Papers

By Kieron Gillen on September 13th, 2009 at 6:45 pm.

Sundays are for working your way from Agatha-Christie-esque countryside across the country towards an eventual destination of evening Agatha-Christie Sunday Evening Cheesy Adaptations. But on the way I take a break to chew on pop-corn, sip tea and compile a list of some of the fine reading that came to my attention this week, present it for your delectation and try not to include a link to a couple of pieces of pop music. I must try. I must.

Failed.

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72 Comments »

  1. Dante says:

    Didn’t he say he was ‘proud’ and ‘pleased’ to apologise?

    I’m sorry Gordon, but I’m pretty sure the English language doesn’t work that way.

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  2. Nicolas says:

    Thanks for the Los Campesinos! link, I hadn’t noticed that :D

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  3. Alex says:

    Well, that Making-Of article confirms everything I feared. Ion Storm went under not because of gross mismanagement, but because it was a front for Al Qaeda.

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  4. DullEdge says:

    There’s more meat in this article.

    Wish Spector could give out more details on the Mickey Mouse game he’s working on (aside from freaky zombie Goofy concept arts that may or may not be related).

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  5. Dracko says:

    Too little, too late, Gordon.

    Nice PR stunt, though. Let’s see how little it helps.

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  6. Mr Lizard says:

    There’s no way it’s possible to predict review scores just by playing the game, biometrics or no biometrics. You can’t second-guess a games reviewer. That guy must have an accomplice standing just out of earshot reading the review and signalling the score to him or something.

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  7. Xercies says:

    That predict a review score scares me, it means design by commitee it means every game will be the same ebcause these gusy say to get an 80% you always have to do this. That would be the death of original ideas and i frankly would not care for it. And anyway it assumes the 80% fro ma reviewer equals more money in the first place which from last week looking at those metacritic scores it doesn’t seem to.

    Also Gordon brown should apologise for every gay that was treated like that back then because there were more people then Turin that got treated like that and it is one of the many disgusting tings we did in our past.

    Also that Beatles rock Band review is horrible and that guy is everything thats wrong with some people outside of games journalism.

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  8. Kieron must get a lot of people sending him comic scripts for from the unwashed public. Just tell them “No, I will not reading your fucking comic.”

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  9. Psychopomp says:

    On another note, Beatles Rock Band is still really, really fun.

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  10. Jayt says:

    Is that NY Times article down?

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  11. The_B says:

    I want to fuck your Mother, Kieron. It’s a dirty job but someone’s got to do it well.

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  12. Please don’t tell my father.

    KG

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  13. Theory says:

    I do find that it’s easy to accurately predict whether a game will be good or not from early media (though of course, your results are your results). Try it retrospectively , both with games you’ve played and games you’ve not: there IS a clear difference.

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  14. LewieP says:

    That is a lovely new song from Los Campesinos! indeed. Thanky.

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  15. JKjoker says:

    uh, creating a “how to get good scores” algorithm is so stupid, there are so many reasons this is doomed to epic fail, for example :

    it would cause all games to follow the “perfect formula” making them even more similar to each other than they are today

    the algorithm considers the past opinions as constants when they are not, ppl loved slowmo in max payne, not so much the next 100000 games that did it, today is pretty much a meh, the more you consider “something” as a key to get good scores the faster it will become rancid and obsolete.

    they assume the reviews are accurate, when if you ask anyone they will tell you that youll have better chance winning the lottery than reading a good, accurate, unbiased, descriptive and objective game review.

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  16. Johnny Law says:

    Well that’s an interesting — and disappointing — article on Red Faction. I’ve been waiting on the PC version. Started hearing some bad things about keybinding options, sound behavior, and vsync yesterday. The keybinding and sound issues aren’t ones that would affect my personal setup, and the vsync problems can be worked around (as this article talks about too), but those are warning signs.

    The news of iffy performance isn’t a huge surprise, but I was certainly hoping for better. At this point I’m really curious about the mouse behavior (e.g. is it like Dead Space PC where the mouse basically emulates the controller). If there’s not much point in getting the PC version I may just wait for a bargain-bin sale on the 360 version, or take a pass altogether.

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  17. Vinraith says:

    Am I the only one that finds Rock Band: Beatles a little creepy? Maybe it’s just the advertising, but there’s just something off-putting about digitally resurrected images of Lennon and Harrison.

    It’s nice to see Turing acknowledged, even if it is pathetically overdue. The man’s contributions to the modern world are literally incalculable, there’s no real excuse for his name not standing next to Newton and Einstein in the history books. The simple fact is none of us would be capable of doing what we’re doing right this second without him.

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  18. Pockets says:

    Los Campesinos don’t say thanks if you hold the door open. :(

    A really, really, awful claim to fame, isn’t it?

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  19. Yeah, all the dead rockstars reanimated are a little freakshow.

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  20. CourtneyLuv says:

    DAT”Z WHAT I’M TWEETZING ABOUT!

    THOSE NECROPHLIACS USING MY DEAD HUSBANDS LIKNESS TO PLAY BONJOVI SONGS!

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  21. LewieP says:

    @Pockets
    I sat in on an interview with them at last years Indietracks festival.

    So yes.

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  22. Kester says:

    The amount of research Ion Storm put into Deus Ex sounds incredible. Maps of the White House, lawyers getting hold of executive orders, and half of it didn’t even end up in the game. I’d never really thought about how much effort goes into creating a convincing world like that.

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  23. ascagnel says:

    @Vinraith:

    I. Totally. Agree. As a CS major, I can tell you with 100% certainty that Turing is the most influential member of the field. Every bit of research into algorithms and hardware development can be traced directly back to what he did. Its about damned time he got his due.

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  24. Robin says:

    Gaming Daily duly added to the idiot list. Thanks for the heads-up.

    I think you’re being a bit harsh on the Digital Foundry articles. I’ve no doubt they generate a lot of traffic for Eurogamer from fanboys, but they’ve presented a much clearer picture of the performance of games on each format than could be gleaned from over-analysing developer’s interview quotes.

    There’s no other site analysing the performance of console games as closely. If you look at the extremely simplistic comparison articles attempted by the likes of IGN and Gamespot, it’s clear that DF are tackling a niche for which no-one else is properly equipped. There’s a general trend in console journalism to gloss over version differences for the sake of not rocking the boat, which isn’t very helpful.

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  25. Jazmeister says:

    Next, it’s Rock Band: Turing. I called it.

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  26. l1ddl3monkey says:

    To go with “I will not read your fucking script” (which I did read earlier in the week) here’s former Star Trek (the original series) writer David Gerrold on why he thinks Olsen’s stance is not harsh enough!

    http://blogs.villagevoice.com/runninscared/archives/2009/09/scifi_writer_da.php

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  27. Kadayi says:

    That Josh Olson article is ace. Albeit I’m not a writer by trade I appreciate the angle he’s coming from, esp when dealing with the truly hopeless.

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  28. Therlun says:

    Oh RMT issues.
    I think its funny how CCP tries to convince its players that the game will be so much better without the ISK-farming bots.
    The people farming and selling ISK don’t do it for fun, but because Eve like many other games just has some terrible design elements a few players with too much money would like to avoid.
    But I guess keeping the grind, banning the farmers and telling the game gets better that way is easier than ACTUALLY making the game better.

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  29. CdrJameson says:

    I Will Not Fix Your Fucking Computer?

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  30. Noc says:

    @Therlun: Because, you know, it’s not like CCP has set up a legitimate RMT system or anything.

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  31. Kester says:

    That Olson article seems about right for a screenwriter: they’re all a bunch of drama queens. He’s trying to blame other people for the fact that he can’t say “no” and has a hangup about having to have everyone else like him.

    While I can appreciate what a pain in the arse it must be to get asked to read stuff all the time, the industry is so cliquey that by far the best way to break in is to do exactly that and get someone who’s established to read your script. You really can’t blame people for trying just because you don’t have the social skills or strength of character to turn them down.

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  32. Psychopomp says:

    @Courtney

    On a more serious note, the whole thing is insulting on an artistic level.

    Using his image like this is basically pissing on his grave, and everything he believed in, and I don’t even like Nirvana all that much.

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  33. LewieP says:

    If only Courtney hadn’t murdered him, he would still be around to defend himself.

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  34. Hastur says:

    Olson’s article would have more credibility if it had been written by someone other than the hack responsible for “A History of Violence”. That movie had some pretty accomplished actors and a pretty interesting plot, but their contributions were obliterated by the abysmal screenplay.

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  35. Ravenger says:

    I had the same problem in a previous job when customers sent in sequel ideas or even whole game designs based on a game I’d worked on. I couldn’t read them just in case their ideas matched some of the elements in our planned sequel, leaving us open to claims that we’d stolen their ideas. I had to write back to them saying we never accept or read unsolicited game designs due to the legal problems they can cause.

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  36. lumpi says:

    These articles comparing console games, and their unwanted stepchildren, the PC-ports, are getting sadder and sadder.

    Why is it, that I cannot find a significant difference between a 4-year-old console and a high-end PC running those games? A sunbeam here, a softer shadow there… but in the end even your 9999XTX can’t handle either and you have to scale it back to quasi-360 levels anyway.

    The main difference is, that PC hardware cost about 3 times as much as a 360, yet only brings a ridiculous 10% improvement (if that). And yes, I’m a “visual type”.

    Maybe PC developers should look into that highly frustrating fact, instead of slaughtering lambs at the piracy-altar.

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  37. jalf says:

    @ascagnel: Well, Church was pretty damn influential too. But yeah. I found it funny how Brown’s talk only spoke about winning WW2, and not a word about basically inventing computer science.

    Did you see this btw? http://james-iry.blogspot.com/2009/05/brief-incomplete-and-mostly-wrong.html

    1936 – Alan Turing invents every programming language that will ever be but is shanghaied by British Intelligence to be 007 before he can patent them.

    1936 – Alonzo Church also invents every language that will ever be but does it better. His lambda calculus is ignored because it is insufficiently C-like. This criticism occurs in spite of the fact that C has not yet been invented.

    :D

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  38. Therlun says:

    @Noc
    Offering something and at the same time condemning it does nothing to solve basic problem. :P
    It also seems as if the legitimate offer by CCP is inferior to the illegal one… or those farmers wouldn’t be such a “terrible scourge” to the game.

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  39. PHeMoX says:

    “That predict a review score scares me, it means design by commitee it means every game will be the same ebcause these gusy say to get an 80% you always have to do this. That would be the death of original ideas and i frankly would not care for it.”

    From a commercial point of view this makes perfect sense though. Where huge profits may equal a higher risk investment, sticking with proven formulas will have a fairly predictable profit. Think EA’s Fifa series or even their Need For Speed series. People like soccer, people like fast cars. You’ll hardly need to change more than 20% to keep those customers satisfied despite having to pay for a new game.

    A commercial success just about every time…. it’s sad but true, games do also work this way.

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  40. Stu says:

    Ah, S*M*A*S*H. I remember back in my NME-reading days when them and These Animal Men were spearheading the NWONW. I had “(I Want To) Kill Somebody” on an old singles of the year compilation and always wondered what that first line was: “A statistician studies Titian”? Google says it is, but c’mon, that’s a little bit rubbish, isn’t it? And I can’t make up my mind whether “Gill Shepherd’s got an appalling unemployment record” is ace or shit.

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  41. Stu says:

    PS. As for predicting review scores, I believe it’s done with split-screen.

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  42. Mike says:

    The Turing stuff is largely shit. ¬_¬

    Cheers for the Blue Casket link again, RPS. We love you guys.

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  43. Sunjammer says:

    I still can’t get over Turing being sentenced to “Chemical Castration”. That term fills me with unholy dread

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  44. luminosity says:

    I’d love to be looking forward to Red Faction: Guerrilla, but the Steam price for Australians is $70 USD, when the Americans are charged $40 USD. There’s no fucking cause at all for this price disparity in digital distribution where it costs the same to deliver the game to me as to an American, and I’m absolutely sick of the dirty publishers trying to gouge extra out of us, just because they think they can get away with it.

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  45. Gap Gen says:

    Could someone post a dead celebrity GH5 version of Thriller? Actually, please don’t.

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  46. Gap Gen says:

    Xercies: I don’t know, there’s a lot of scope inside that 80-100% to differentiate between a classic and a merely very competent game. As far as testing goes, I don’t think it’s particularly soulless to say “this plain doesn’t work” or “this isn’t as scary as you think it is” or whatever.

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  47. Mike says:

    Sunjammer – he chose it, over imprisonment. But yeah, it wasn’t great.

    BUT WE APOLOGISED SO NOW IT IS ALL OKAY.

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  48. Thants says:

    Regarding the Red Faction Guerrilla comparison: If you’re going to have comparison pictures it helps if the brightness isn’t set much higher in half of them.

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  49. Stromko says:

    I’m rather concerned about that article via Vertical Slice as well. If any developers (or publishers) actually believe this method, or are cynical enough to use it … Ugh.

    Particularly because it’s built to rope people in WITH THE DEMO. How many demos have you played that were much, much better than the actual game? We can expect a lot more of that, if such a method is used. I’m 90% sure, and I’m an expert about being disappointed by videogames so the margin of error is only +/- 5%.

    Drilling the game down to 30 fantastic seconds that convince people to buy .. or more realistically a demo that convinces people to buy .. Yeesh. I hope there are no developers cynical enough to actually buy into that, and no publishers nasty enough to force them to. But I know there are, and that’s where most of the money is going.

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  50. vanarbulax says:

    Wow, The Beatles: Rock Band “reoffers an entire world view encapsulated in music”, “the most important video game yet made.”, unlike most games is not devoid of other meaning.

    Jesus if all it took was a button matching game and a digital represtantion of a pop-band to make games as art, why do developers even bother?

    Throughly agree with John Teti, worst review ever.

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  51. Noc says:

    @Therlun: Let me elaborate, then. The problem with EVE and gold farming ISN’T that people are willing to pay money for in-game currency rather than grinding it out themselves. Not that EVE doesn’t have problems, but this isn’t really one of them; arguably, one of the features of EVE is that ships and equipment have real value and can be lost, and that this makes things more interesting.

    (Hell, there’s a growing complaint that it’s becoming to easy to make tons of money in EVE, and that rare, expensive ships aren’t nearly as rare and expensive as they used to be.)

    . . .

    The problem with the farmers is that they clog up game resources, both in terms of server capacity and in-game space, as illustrated by those there graphs in the article. It makes it significantly harder for players to make money legitimately if bot-run miners are chewing through their asteroid fields in droves. Hell, large numbers of bots become a travel hazard, as they lag up and slow down travel through the systems they populate.

    The OTHER problem is that these RMT organizations are a big source of malware and keyloggers and account hijacking, which causes all manner of disruption for players who patronize them. Players aren’t choosing to buy ISK through them because it’s a legitimately better deal offered by a better service; they’re doing it because they don’t know any better and get their account stolen for their trouble.

    (It only appears to be a “better service” because they offer ISK at much lower prices. Which CCP would be stupid to match, because they don’t want to fuck up their economy. Especially considering that an actually functional economy is one of the reasons the game runs as well as it does. Considering the minimal amount of impact banning thousands of RMT accounts had on the market, the actual amount of ISK coming from these transactions is relatively small; “terrible scourge” is from all of the other side effects of large scale RMT operation.)

    Not to mention filling chat channels and the forums with spam.

    . . .

    So CCP doesn’t like ISK-sellers for several well-defined reasons that have nothing to do with the idea of people converting real money to ISK being an inherently bad thing. It’s not symptomatic of a problem in the game.

    CCP doesn’t like ISK sellers because they’re extremely disruptive to everybody else. Which is why they’re working on cracking down on RMT operations and providing a legitimate, safe alternative.

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  52. Metal_Circus says:

    that article about reading scripts breaks my heart, and feeds right into my fear, as a writer, that I cannot acctually write, despite being at it seriously for years. Stuff like that just makes me want to go back to the drawing board and start all over again.
    Fuck.

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  53. Spectre-7 says:

    @Metal_Circus: If it’s any consolation, I’m pretty sure that terrifying little neurosis lurks somewhere in the back of every writer’s head. It just comes with the territory.

    Of course, it gets worse sometimes. Every so often, you stumble across someone whose writing is so damned awful you can’t stand to read more than a paragraph of it, yet the writer is sure he’s quite good. If he can be that delusional, how do you know you haven’t been lying to yourself all these years?

    There are only two options at that point. Either you quit, or you pick yourself up, dust yourself off, toss out the now-empty bottles that saw you through the ordeal and head back to the keyboard. If you choose whichever one makes you happy, you’ll have made the right choice.

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  54. Arathain says:

    @Metal_Circus: If you haven’t already read it, I strongly recommend Anne Lamott’s Bird By Bird, her book on writing. She has some excellent and entertaining stuff on the neuroses that prey on every writer, and overcoming them.

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  55. Stromko says:

    Metal_Circus: That article about reading scripts, I think it really refers to people who hand this guy a script and expect him to give useful feedback. He really can’t. You can’t teach someone how to be a better writer by reading one script, especially if they’ve put no time into it.

    I don’t believe anyone is a naturally good writer. Some people have real ‘talent’ in the sense that they pick up on things quickly, they learn from their experiences faster than others. Some enjoy it so much they don’t see it as work. There’s still a time component, and nobody’s first story is good or even readable.

    I’d love it if the first story I wrote was the story I really gave a damn about, and I could actually do it justice, but that’s simply impossible. If I personally wanted to be a better writer, I’d just take a class at the community college where I’m expected to turn in a bunch of short stories for a grade. I definitely wouldn’t do the stories I really gave a damn about there, but it’d do me a lot of good when I set my mind to something I care about.

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  56. lumpi says:

    “From a commercial point of view this makes perfect sense though. Where huge profits may equal a higher risk investment, sticking with proven formulas will have a fairly predictable profit. Think EA’s Fifa series or even their Need For Speed series. People like soccer, people like fast cars. You’ll hardly need to change more than 20% to keep those customers satisfied despite having to pay for a new game.”

    Not directed towards the original poster of this paragraph, but why is it that every second gaming blog comment these days reads like a lesson in corporate efficiency? Wasn’t there a time when people were skeptical about faceless turbo-capitalism? Do we really have to feel respect or sympathy towards a company, just because they hired an army of under-payed and over-worked programmers, artists and PR people to produce uninspired, focus group approved mega-productions at a 100 mil budget?

    You know, it’s all frighteningly insightful to see how game companies shape their gaming experience after 30 second impressions… but why aren’t they ashamed to even advertise that practice on a gamer-focused site? Why is that considered appropriate?

    “We’re not game designers, but we can influence the game design.” Isn’t that sentence plain cynical to gamers?

    Why are so many surrendering to this embarrassing state of the gaming industry? I see many that do not like it, but more who do not even find it necessary to protest it.

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  57. Bret says:

    Well, some people just roll with faceless turbo capitalism, others consider everyone who commits the crime of (GASP!) trying to get money to be pure evil incarnate (to the point of hating Valve for… well, everything. Chet was right about the 20 bucks for a ten business).

    People make mistakes in all directions. You just have to learn to live with it.

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  58. Hastur says:

    @Psychopomp
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Credibility

    Anyway my post was more an appeal to those who might consider an appeal to Mr Olson.

    He does write a good rant though, and should consider foregoing further screenwriting for a promising career in critical review. Strongly consider.

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  59. Vinraith says:

    @Bret

    Pick any popular game company and there are going to be two small but vocal minorities with respect to them: one that would complain about paying $10 for a game box that contained a $20 bill, and another that would pay $20 for a box full of literal feces. The tricks are 1) not to be in either of those groups and 2) not to categorize people with a more nuanced position as being in one of those groups. There’s been a lot of the latter going around in Valve threads around here, from both sides.

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  60. Vinraith says:

    that should be “would pay $50 for a box full of literal feces.” Though I suppose the $20 box of crap would probably sell better. :)

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  61. Kommissar Nicko says:

    The NY Times article about Rock Band made me apoplectic with rage. Maybe because I spent a lot of time with slavering, pandering neo-hippies while getting my BA (in political science, naturally). Maybe because the TRUE WARRIOR way to bait a baby-boomer is to say, “The revolutionary free-spirited-ness of your generation was just a facade that crumbled at the first sign of the Man waving cash at you.” Or maybe it’s because Rock Band is the furthest thing from innovative or interesting.

    Maybe.

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  62. Muzman says:

    The writing thing, while it’s amusing and I can see the bind the guy is in and it’s definitely true that everyone thinks they can write just because it requires little technical skill, this does remind me just how egotistical the whole enterprise is.
    I swear once people get a job in “the biz” they forget almost instantly what it’s like to not be in it and it’s replaced by bloodyminded stuff like that or terribly bland magnanimity (some of which he expresses in there) about passion and art. “If you’re a writer, you’ll be a writer no matter what. No one will be able to stop you” or whatever he says. Self Help book balderdash. He needs to remember that the whole thing is a crap shoot and he knows perfectly well people who write utter garbage are gainfully employed and can say the exact same things he can (and, as pointed out, some people think he’s one of them). How long has ‘Heroes’ been running? (snark snark).
    I don’t want to advocate a world where every would be writer is treated with kid gloves so that they aren’t put off. He does have some good advice in there: an idea is not writing; a story isn’t even writing; there are places that will tell you how to format this stuff for nothing; if you’re not sure you can do it (and it takes you a year of fiddly redrafting) you should perhaps take your idea to a writer instead of doing it yourself.
    But this relatively mild discomfort of his seems a pretty small price to pay for having a creative job (and all the credits and connections that go with it) that so many people want.

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  63. @Robin – you disagree with an opinion piece and therefore brandish us idiots? Really? Ah well, life goes on.

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  64. TooNu says:

    - That Kurt bloke singing BonJovi songs was a bit wrong and probably, immoral.
    - The article about Gordon Brown apologising is gaming related how? (because the guy was a coder…ooooh I gedit)
    - The Science Fiction list was cool.
    - I will not read your fucking blog. It was amusing and you can apply that situation to everything.
    - Your choice in music is always bad bad bad.

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  65. Mike says:

    No-one’s brandishing anything at you, Waste_Manager.

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  66. @Mike. No, you’re right. English fail. :(

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  67. Dolphan says:

    I think people are both reading too much into that review score prediction stuff and giving it too little credit. There’s very interesting research suggesting we can make far more accurate judgements and predictions on very little information than we think we can, and the guy their research is based on seems to credibly be able to predict the long-term future of marriages based on short conversations to a very high level of accuracy.

    The other thing is that it doesn’t lead to set ‘recipes’ for successful games because it’s about predicting a review score based on what people talk about in a game after playing it very briefly (so the game has to be a decent way through development already), not on what features are included in the game. It’s not something that can guide you before you start putting a game together – it could only tell you how much of a potential hit you have on your hands when you’ve already gone quite far down the road.

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  68. Xercies says:

    @Dolphan

    But they are saying that based on this research they can help the companies make better games to get the 80% score and thats why we have the problem with it.

    @Phemox

    You know this is why I hate commericalisation sometimes, I know all this stuff about you have every right to sell your art and you have every right to sell crap to get lots of money. But i feel in myself that there is something wrong with that and i want it to change. it never will its a pipedream and it seems I may be the only one that things that people should make stuff because they like making stuff and not ebcause the can get lots of money from it.

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  69. JuJuCam says:

    In response to the Olson article, I’m totally on his side.

    Amateur writers who wish they were professional: there are pathways towards that type of living available to you. Very few of them involve sending your script to an established writer. If you simply must send it to someone, send it to a publisher in the case of a novel or a producer in the case of a screenplay. Those people get paid to tell you you’re crap (or in extraordinarily rare cases to offer you a job).

    And if you do get told you’re crap but you still think your idea is strong enough to be worth working on, there are classes to take to improve your understanding of how to develop your idea. In all likelihood the writer you want to send your words to took some such classes himself. When you get knocked back, take it as an indicator that there is room for improvement.

    But keep your first drafts. It gives you something to laugh about later.

    Full disclosure: I’m an aspiring writer with a long, long way to go before I would feel comfortable calling myself a fully-fledged Writer. But I’m the sort that’s embarrassed to let anyone read anything I write, let alone someone established.

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  70. Sagan says:

    Your collection of links points to another collection of links which points to another collection of links about computergames. This is madness! You are stealing all my free time!

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