No StarCraft 2 Reviews Before Lunch

By Quintin Smith on July 23rd, 2010 at 2:18 pm.

The Zerg: Most moist race in RTS history?

In what journalists are calling a “Dick Move”, Blizzard has announced that there will be no reviews of StarCraft 2 before lunch. Would-be reviewers are going to have to wait until after everybody in the office has had lunch before posting their review of the hotly anticipated RTS.

Wait, hang on. Sorry, I misread my RSS feed. Blizzard has announced there will be no StarCraft 2 reviews before launch. Before the game’s launch, on Tuesday, when the BattleNet servers go live. According to Eurogamer Blizzard was “unable to offer an official comment at the time of writing”, though they gather that it’s to do with Blizzard not wanting anybody to play the game without the full suite of BattleNet features. What did you have for lunch today, readers?

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250 Comments »

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  1. Premium User Badge

    innokenti says:

    A delicious salmon, potato and pea frittata from the local delicatessen. It was extremely awesome.

    As are these apple crisps I am snacking upon.

  2. Berzee says:

    four ears of raw sweet corn from my parents’ field — in a plastic bag
    ( i did not eat the bag )

  3. Freud says:

    Tuna free dolphin salad.

  4. MrSafin says:

    - Pasta with “sugo all’arrabbiata”
    – A tomatoe, along with a bit of tomatoe
    – Some slice of mortadella
    – A piece of watermelon

  5. Fumarole says:

    Silly Brits eating lunch at 6 am. Today I shall have no lunch as I just ate a rather large breakfast. I may take a nap in my car, though.

  6. Thelonious says:

    Damn you guys, i’m gonna have to go and make an omelette now

  7. fallingmagpie says:

    Battered haddock, chips and mushy peas. I am now stuffed to the point of immobility, and very sleepy.

  8. pakoito says:

    Two bocatas de tortilla de patata and a San Miguel beer.

    • Joe Duck says:

      Con cebolla o sin cebolla?
      Damn, I miss home…

    • Risingson says:

      that’s two montaditos or you were really really hungry.

      BTW, Tortilla de patata isn’t hard to do. It just asks for patience. Where are/were you from, Joe?

  9. Auspex says:

    What varied gastronomic finery us RPS folk eat!

    However I’m not sure what it says about me that this is the first RPS comment thread I’ve followed and read in full for some time…

  10. wedge says:

    chili, mmmm let the gasses flow

  11. Bossman says:

    So, why aren’t people complaining about this more? I remember when APB did almost the same thing there was tons of nerd raging going on.

    • Freud says:

      Didn’t APB want to delay the reviews until a week after the release or so?

    • Bossman says:

      “Didn’t APB want to delay the reviews until a week after the release or so?”

      Do you really think that we are going to see many Starcraft 2 reviews on release day? The reviewers haven’t finished the singleplayer campaign yet so it will easily take at least a week before we see any good SC2 reviews.

    • mrmud says:

      Bruchetta

      The difference is that for APB the entire game had been avaliable in beta form for a very long time (and there were no changes from late beta to retail).
      For SC2 there have been a long multiplayer beta and if thats all the game was then im sure people could review it based on that. But there is also a single player portion and with Blizzards new Battle.net I can understand why they are reluctant to allow people on before its ready.

      I am quite sure that this is not about them being scared about bad reviews (as with APB), but rather about other factors.

    • TenjouUtena says:

      I don’t think any Starcraft 2 reviews are going to make a dent on anyone’s buying decision at this time. Seriously, you’re going to get it at or near launch, or you’re going to wait a while to monitor the nerd rage. I don’t actually think any reviews of Starcraft 2 are needed. It’s not like anyone is breathlessly waiting consumer advice about it.

    • Jimbo says:

      The issue with APB was that they were (initially) trying to say you couldn’t release a review even *after* it was on shelves. The issue wasn’t that there wouldn’t be reviews available, the issue was that they appeared to be under the impression that they somehow had the power or influence to enforce that decision.

      I’ll be waiting for a review, but I can see why Blizz would make this decision. I don’t think they stand to gain much from even great reviews – because that’s what most people expect anyway – but they could lose out on the off-chance that there are a few not-so-great reviews.

    • Freud says:

      @ TenjouUtena

      “I don’t think any Starcraft 2 reviews are going to make a dent on anyone’s buying decision at this time.”

      Actually I never bought the original Starcraft after PC Gamer UK gave it 80% or so. I did enjoy Warcraft II before it. In all honesty, I am not a gigantic fan of RTS games so it was probably more than than the review that ultimately led to me not buying the game. Anyway, I walked around for a year or more believing the game was a disappointment because of that review. Good old pre-internet days.

  12. Antsy says:

    This is a real kick to the nuts for those of us that brunch!

  13. starcraft megafan says:

    Grilled cheese sandwich, a egg drop soup and some steamed broccoli.

    Great game, but the online multiplayer has many problems. Battle.net 2.0 being the main one.

  14. Azazel says:

    Last time I was there I bowed down to the statue of Phil and spoke swedish to a real Swede!

  15. Premium User Badge

    phlebas says:

    A delicious pastrami sandwich from Waitrose next door.
    Did TA Kingdoms ever get a decent patch?

  16. The Hammer says:

    I had two hotdog buns.

  17. Bongo says:

    I done a tummy-shame!

  18. Kael says:

    Stuff lunch! My copy just got posted! :)

  19. Bob Bobson says:

    Instant noodles with a tin of tuna. Proteintastic.

  20. neems says:

    This is the best thread ever, and I don’t even like food.

    I had pitta with seriously strong cheddar and brussels pate (can’t do the acute, sorry).

  21. jon_hill987 says:

    Friday is Chinese day at work. I had Chicken Chow Mein.

  22. cowthief skank says:

    Boring lunch today, soup and toast.

    Need more posts about food.

  23. gandrewsan says:

    Witchfynder General – bagel with chicken, chilli mayo, chorizo, spring onions, lettuce and smoked cheese from the unparalleled Where the Monkey Sleeps.

  24. TeeJay says:

    late breakfast/lunch (combined) = 1 bowl bran flakes + 1 banana + 1 apple + 1 nectarine + 1 cup of Lady Grey tea.

  25. Rakysh says:

    Two cheese sandwiches, one with tomato sauce on, and a cupcake.

  26. ocsurfer says:

    Battlenet was pretty smooth for me the last week of beta, I’m guessing they just don’t want screenshots and spoilers from the Single Player missions hitting the web before their loyal fans get a hold of it. They don’t need the extra publicity,, the game is already going to hit the ground sprinting.

    • Raum says:

      More like with a jetpack running on full throttle and some strapped on NASA grade rocket boosters ready to fire.

  27. Premium User Badge

    Arathain says:

    Just finished some leftover spiced carrot soup that my wife made, eaten with a big hunk of bread, as all soup should be.

    RPS commenters, you are excellent. Thanks, Quinns.

  28. colinmarc says:

    A sausage meatball grinder and a coke. Or, I will in a few minutes. It’s only just after noon.

  29. Premium User Badge

    Arathain says:

    PS. Quinns, I recommend a nice spinach salad for your lunch (presumably the next one). Plenty of iron.

  30. Premium User Badge

    Morph says:

    Chicken ceaser sandwich, butterscotch angel delight, coke zero.

    When I saw over a 100 comments for this thread I assumed some it had been invaded by AIM. Nope, just people eating. The internet is often great.

  31. The Innocent says:

    Mmmm… lunch…

    It’s a sort of holiday here in Utah (Pioneer Day tomorrow, so lots of people have work off today), so we’re going to a greasy spoon diner for lunch. So eggs, bacon, toast, and potatoes. Yum!

    • Jergason says:

      I’m in Utah too. I found out the hard way that I didn’t have work today. It was a wonderful surprise. Cherry tomatoes and carrots. Yes, I am a rabbit.

    • wazups2x says:

      Hey, I’m also in Utah! Sadly I don’t get work off though.

  32. Katsumoto says:

    Roast Beef Monster Munch. Two packets.

  33. Vinraith says:

    I only just ate breakfast (cold cereal), I’ve no idea what I’ll end up having for lunch.

    As to Starcraft 2, they’re welcome to embargo reviews but I’m certainly not buying the game before I see a diversity of critical opinion and word of mouth on the subject. In other words: no Starcraft 2 reviews before launch -> no Starcraft 2 purchase until reviews.

  34. J9 says:

    Eh, oh well not planning to buy it any more regardless. Once I realized they wanted $60 for each 3 separate copies to get the entire game (whenever they get around to releasing the rest) I decided I didn’t really care enough to buy it any more. I’ll buy the game if/when I can find it at least 1/2 off. I don’t really play much multiplayer and that won’t be changing for SC2. Paying $180 for a single player game is a massive rip off (even assuming SC2 lives up to the hype and blizzard’s normal standards, its still not worth $180). Also, I can’t imagine paying $60 for the zerg campaign when it is eventually released, zerg are the polar opposite of my RTS play style, so regardless of how good it is, I can’t imagine myself enjoying playing through (I usually just cheated through the zerg parts in SC to get it done and see the cutscenes).

    Maybe a few years after all 3 parts are released they’ll put out a warchest for an appropriate sum of money. And since the graphics already seem (to me) to have aged a few years while they got multiplayer just right, waiting a few more years to finally play the game won’t really hurt them further.

    • pkt-zer0 says:

      Once I realized they wanted $60 for each 3 separate copies to get the entire game

      They haven’t announced a price point for the expansions yet.

      Paying $180 for a single player game is a massive rip off

      Weirdly enough, I don’t recall people complaining about WC3 being a massive rip off at $120.

    • Psychopomp says:

      Or Dawn of War being a massive rip-off at a couple of hundred dollars.

  35. id says:

    Being absolutely rubbish at RTS games, I don’t care at all about Starcraft….but I do like lunch.

    I had a slice of dutch apple pie and a cup of coffee.

  36. Premium User Badge

    Stompywitch says:

    Our department went out for lunch, I had a parma ham and mozarella ciabatta with coffee and glayva cheesecake. Lovely, but the service was really slow.

    I’m not really interested in SC2. I know I’ll probably get it at some point, if it ever gets cheap, but I’ve built bases and amassed armies… I really prefer what Relic have been doing to the genre with Dawn of War 2 (And I’ve looking forward to the next expansion for that :) )

  37. Gassalasca says:

    I had sataraš. Mmmm…. sataraš. <3

  38. Raum says:

    I had traditional Norwegian dish that I don’t know if there’s any international name for. Different kinds of dried meat and sausage, with scrambled eggs, potato salad and Norwegian flatbread (which, surprisingly, is an English word).

  39. fenton says:

    I had FIRE WINGS for lunch. They were good FIRE WINGS. But now I have a FIRE ASSHOLE.

  40. wyrmsine says:

    Mango chutney chicken wrap. Eatin’ it right now. Compare your lunch to mine, and then kill yourselves!

  41. Premium User Badge

    jaheira says:

    Ready Salted Walker’s. The nicest flavour.

  42. Wulf says:

    I’m going to be boring and say that I had a ploughman’s sandwich with a glass of ice-cold mineral water.

    I admit, I’m rather much more looking forward to tea, as that’s when I shall be supping on rice and chicken in a Reggae Reggae sauce, because I absolutely adore ridiculously hot food.

  43. monkeybreadman says:

    Chicken shwerma, from Abu Zaads in Shepherds Bush! Yummy

  44. Froibo says:

    Brocoli pizza and a cheese and spinach rice ball.

  45. Maxheadroom says:

    Despite being so old that I recently found a battered copy of C&VG in the loft (with Fun Boy 3 on the front cover) that I apparently bought in 1983, the original Starcraft somehow completely passed me by.

    So all this “The Wait. Is Almost. Over” hype is totally lost on me. Could someone please tell me if it’s actually any good – even if I dont know what a ‘Zerg’ is?

    • Nobody Important says:

      I’m a pretty new PC gamer (I got into gaming in the N64) and I went back to StarCraft. It’s really quite good. The story is great, the missions are fun and the RTS balance is top notch. Definitely worth picking up if you can find it cheap (it’s $15 to download on Blizzard’s shop).

      Some people seem to prefer the Company of Heroes type of RTS game where you reach nodes like in a Battlefield game, but I like StarCraft more. It’s simple. Wipe them all out, go! And if you’re worried about micromanagement, WarCraft 3 is much worse. StarCraft’s micro isn’t too bad. It’s a good balance.

      I will be having tacos for lunch.

  46. CMaster says:

    Wetherspoons’ chicken burger.
    Was better than I expected

  47. Dresden says:

    Ahhhh fresh meat!

  48. clive dunn says:

    ‘Katsumoto says: July 23, 2010 at 5:52 pm Roast Beef Monster Munch. Two packets’

    i had these last night, they don’t have the kick of pickled onion but at least you are left with some mouth skin.

  49. clive dunn says:

    ‘jaheira says: July 23, 2010 at 7:24 pm Ready Salted Walker’s. The nicest flavour.’

    Absolutly!

    and an excellent compliment to most foodstuffs.

    err, we might need a seperate crisp thread.

  50. EoL says:

    Two large pieces of rye bread (the round kind) with cucumber and slices of finnish meetvursti and porridge with a cup of coffee afterwards.