PSA: Bulletstorm Is Bad For Your Flatmate

By John Walker on February 28th, 2011 at 4:18 pm.

The face of danger.

Okay, so I was wrong. I admit it. Everything Dr Carole Lieberman said was absolutely true. The proof is below.

Be warned, this is in bad taste, and those likely to be offended should best avoid.

It’s also very funny. Good work, Spencer Williams.

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55 Comments »

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  1. JFreeman says:

    Hey Spencer, it’s that guy you are!

  2. Swiss says:

    Rape is also 40% more likely if you have a beard. I’m not going to cite research, because it should be obvious to everyone.

  3. Chakawi says:

    Does this mean that if I play Puzzle Quest I’ll get raped? Crappers I’m scared!!

  4. Raziel_aXd says:

    But what will DNF make us do? Pi** too much?

    • MrWolf says:

      My understanding of the quantum impact of DNF based on the projected curve of dementia and violent behavior already initiated by Bulletstorm is that if will make you rape yourself in your dick with your dick.

    • The Army of None says:

      Comment of the day right there, MrWolf

    • Raziel_aXd says:

      @MrWolf So… you’ve played Bulletstorm, DNF and Serious Sam 3 already…

    • Wilson says:

      Duh, he’s clearly from the future!

    • DJ Phantoon says:

      He’s from a terrible future, where rape has been outlawed- oh, wait.

      (Disclaimer: Just in case someone reading these comments is capable of being offended but not understanding sarcasm, I am not being serious. I am not pro-rape, and I will not vote for any politician that endorses it.)

  5. HeavyStorm says:

    Damn. I’m offended.

  6. bascule42 says:

    Fox News here….fuuuuuuckkkk yoooooouuuuu RP muthfuckin’ S Godaaaamn! USA! USA! USA!

    • JFS says:

      Another one who clearly comes from a terrible dystopian future… hm? What? The… United States? Uh-hu — oh.

  7. OldRat says:

    Well, by the time I got to Waggleton P. Tallylicker, your very own remote-controlled robot-dinosaur with laser eyes, I did feel a right big erection developing. Must have been my body preparing to rape.

  8. Premium User Badge

    Devilturnip says:

    Thanks for the comments everyone! Glad to see people are enjoying the video.

    • Ziv says:

      Laughed out loud. Seriously.
      One thing though, I couldn’t help but notice that your steam list of owned games does not show Bulletstorm…………..

    • Navagon says:

      It was great. Made me laugh. The expressions were priceless.

    • Premium User Badge

      Devilturnip says:

      $60 is generally too steep for a game for me. I got it a bit cheaper with trade-ins, and it came in a fancy box.

  9. adonf says:

    There’s no way these two guys live in a house decorated like that.

  10. kit89 says:

    My mum has that cuckoo clock…

  11. Tei says:

    I think Bulletstorm was created by the CIA, … like 4chan or the SomethingAwnful forums, to give some type of people something to be busy that is not harmfull to the society.

  12. Bayemon says:

    Bwahahahaha.

    Good juju!

  13. bowl of snakes says:

    Actually, having some probs with this game… trying to coordinate a double penetration on multiplayer sounds absolutely awful out of context.

    • DJ Phantoon says:

      I just aim for a shoulder with the machine gun, then aim above the target until someone else starts shooting.

    • pipman3000 says:

      trying to coordinate a double penetration on multiplayer

      what the hell

      bulletstorm just set the games-as-art movement back 30 years.

  14. HeroJez says:

    Fat…. people are great.

    (Edit: …. people are great.)

    • torchedEARTH says:

      Hmmmm.

    • Premium User Badge

      Devilturnip says:

      And that’s one reason why I’ve been reluctant to do videos in the past. Thanks for confirming my worst expectations!

    • HeroJez says:

      Nooo.. don’t be put off. I’m just filling the hole that you guys have left regarding the whole ‘forum replies to stuff’ scenario…

      You need idiots like me to berate so you, the wonderful Light Side RPS collective, can boost your camaraderie! Having said that, without Judas, Darth Vader and Emperor Zerg real-life events would have turned out a lot differently… so you can’t really blame me for my post…. it is that which balances virtual life in the internets.

      FYI: Fat people are important. We need them for movies.

    • Navagon says:

      Just ignore him. You get tossers in all walks of life and on the internet they get to be tossers with relative anonymity. Fuck ‘em*.

      *This comment is not intended to cause rape.

    • sassy says:

      Thanks for the disclaimer Navagon, I was totally putting on my rape hat and shoes and about to go looking for HeroJez.

      *Everyone should totally own a rape hat

    • Tetragrammaton says:

      Youtube comments make their inevitable shuffling crawl into RPS threads. Way to go HeroJez.

    • HeroJez says:

      Sorry. It was just a bit of fun. I apologise. :)

  15. Synchrony says:

    Fox news breaking headline: leading games website rockpapershotgun confirm bulletstorm causes rape despite earlier denying the claim “Okay, so I was wrong. I admit it. Everything Dr Carole Lieberman said was absolutely true”

    • DJ Phantoon says:

      Oh, if they ran a story on this, Fox wouldn’t stop there. They’d also say that John admitted to being the grandson of Hitler, for starters. Then Glenn Beck would cry about… something. Anything. Anyways, he would cry.

    • Premium User Badge

      Joshua says:

      John supports the Illuminati. He is a great fan of Deus Ex, where you activily work to undermine the US goverment and where the game forces you to kill anti-terrorist units.

  16. YanDaik says:

    Bulletstorm is just bad…

  17. Navagon says:

    Oh and STARING EYES TAG IS BACK! Yay!

  18. Navagon says:

    No, little spammer dude. It’s not an unexpected surprise. It’s s fly in the ointment. One that’s been there for months, but you’re too cheap to replace the ointment so you just begrudgingly work around it

  19. Batolemaeus says:

    Someone should finally expose how hundreds of people rape each other in Eve Online every day.

  20. pipman3000 says:

    his neckbeard disgusts me. i look at it enough and i can nearly see the years worth of junk food crumbs and soft drink spills that have clung to it at one time or another.

    if you’re reading this shave that thing now!

    seriously get rid of the beard and you will be fine. it makes me want to vomit.

    • Premium User Badge

      Devilturnip says:

      Believe it or not, I don’t adjust my appearance based on what some guy on the internet says. It’s technically not a neckbeard, just a long goatee.

      And I do wash, you know.

    • Nick says:

      Don’t worry, he is an ignorant prick.

    • Swiss says:

      Has someone been traumatized by a dirty bearded man?

      WAS IT BECAUSE HE PLAYED BULLETSTORM!?

  21. Odeon says:

    Yeah, I don’t know about this video. I mean sure, it showed conclusively how thousands and thousands of people playing Bulletstorm will inevitably end up raping someone close to them (physically close, if not emotionally), but it just seems like the video’s a bit… off.

    Maybe Devilturnip only played the first level or his built-in inhibitions are a bit lower than usual, but it seems like the attack should have been more violent. The Fox News article assured me that these rape cases would be *extremely* violent in nature, yet this guy’s just creeping down his hallway to get to his roommate. I’m sure that if he played through more of the game, he’d have thrown back his chair as he jumped to his feet, then run screaming something like “SAUSAGE FEEEEEEEST!” as he ran down the hallway towards his roommate with fiery desire and hatred in his eyes.

    Right?

  22. RegisteredUser says:

    This is SO lacking severe scenes of Jack Black worthy dryhumping(preferably with squeakytoy squeaknoise dubbing).

    Sorry, but fail.