Rock, Paper, Shotgun

Dead Mage’s Persian brawler Garshasp: The Monster Slayer came out yesterday and I’ve given it a quick eyeing to bring you my thoughts, which you can find below.
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We can bring you news that Good Old Games definitely haven’t changed their geo-locating policies in order to get around the Australian censoring or price hikes of The Witcher 2. Under no circumstances have the changes announced last night, that mean customers’ IPs will are no longer tracked when making purchases, anything to do with letting Oz, and perhaps even American gamers get full access to the game.

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Remember Crysis 2? Eh? Bringing it back into our memories is the forthcoming release of a DLC pack of maps, for which the good folks at Trailer Making Inc. have made a trailer. Eyes down.

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Well, 5% down to 11.4mil, so it’s still got about as many subs as people who live in London. On the conference call that revealed the drop, Blizzard president Michael Morhaime explained: “As our players have become more experienced playing World of Warcraft over many years, they have become much better and much faster at consuming content… And so I think with Cataclysm they were able to consume the content faster than with previous expansions, but that’s why we’re working on developing more content… We need to be faster at delivering content to players. And so that’s one of the reasons that we’re looking to decrease the amount of time in-between expansions.”

Yes, more expansions! Faster! Crack the whip on those lazy expansion developers, I say.

Holy smokes. PC Gamer reports that Global Agenda developers Hi-Rez Studios have released the first two screenshots of Tribes Ascend on the game’s Facebook page, and they look plenty promising (especially so if that giant ship you can see above is accessible and a part of the level). Hi-Rez would hardly be my first choice to develop a new Tribes game, but fingers crossed they’ll blow this out of the water and prove me for a fool. Full images after the jump.
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There’s a new trailer for arcade hack’n'slash RPG Dungeon Siege III, featuring footage of the game’s four player co-op mode. Tell you what, as much as a deviation from Dungeon Siege 1 and 2 as this is, with four characters explosively disassembling monsters on the same screen and with the camera tilted just so, it finally starts to look like a Dungeon Siege game. How about that! Come see what I mean.

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The Witcher 2 comes out in… 631,800 seconds! (That’s the 17th May to you.) People are excited. Some are too excited. Others still are depressed, because they’ve realised that once it’s released they’ll no longer be able to make every single RPG thread on the internet the home of the tedium of their saying “Witcher 2 will be better,” no matter what is being discussed. But for those struggling to control themselves, there are two new videos of the game below.

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Eurogamer are throwing caution to the wind, babies out with bathwater, and quite possible, down, by announcing that they keep hearing rumours of Call Of Duty’s next release due on 8th November 2011. While Activision has yet to announce this year’s inevitable blockbuster best-seller Christmas smash hit, everyone’s expecting one, and expecting it to come from the rubbled remains of Infinity Ward. And according to a top secret internal Tesco database (has Tesco bought MI6?) it is currently named Call Of Duty: Project Collossus. Which would be a spectacularly terrible name (not least because it’s spelt “colossus”), but is probably just the codename for the game while it’s in development. I imagine they’ll call it something crazy like, hmmm, Call Of Duty: Modern Warfare 3? We don’t know. And knowing you grumpy bastards, you don’t care. But whether you like it or not, you stroppy thing, it’ll be the biggest game of the holiday season. We’re bound to find out more details at E3 at the beginning of next month.

A couple of weeks ago we were speculating on what US journalist Geoff Keighley meant in his iPad-only documentary The Final Hours of Portal 2 (yes, iPad-only) (I DON’T KNOW) when he said…

“Portal 2 will probably be Valve’s last game with an isolated single-player experience… What this all means is something Newell is still trying to figure out.”

…and there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth, and many were the bottles of Coke Zero accidentally upended onto keyboards by corybantic nerds. Now Ripten‘s reported on an interview with Gabe Newell where he explains most of what he meant. Click through the jump for the quote in full.
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David Braben, he of Elite fame, has unveiled a PC that fits on a USB stick, the Raspberry PI. He has also unveiled a brand new way of pronouncing “obfuscated”. The device has an HDMI in at one end, and a USB out at the other, letting you plug it directly into a television, and then attach a keyboard. Braben’s rather egalitarian idea is that it would be cheap enough (“Ten to fifteen pounds,”) that every child could own one, with the idea that they could learn to program. It sounds really promising. But are there some issues, too?

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This one’s a cutie. A side-scrolling physics platformer, in which you must negotiate levels with the goal of collecting materials for, well, further exploration. BEEP is a robot. Robots are cool, or cute. BEEP is not cool. He’s programmed to complete basic tasks, such as gather items, shoot baddies, and manipulate the environment. Thank goodness those are the things anyone needs to do in a physics platformer!

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