The Postal III Trailer Is Interesting

By Jim Rossignol on June 6th, 2011 at 12:02 pm.

Yes.
I originally typo’d “Portal 3 trailer”. Imagine if this was the Portal 3 trailer.

It’s the Postal III trailer. NSFW.

Is that a Mario porn reference?

And is the dog playable?

No urination this time?

So many questions.

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69 Comments »

  1. InsidiousBoot says:

    Its been in development for quite some time now and that’s usually good for the quality of the game, I was a bit disappointed with how it came out when the first trailer came out.. a long time ago. But I’m actually excited for it now, looks fun. Haven’t seen any games that compare with Postal.

    • Lord Byte says:

      What? What… It looks like 2001… It looks like 2001 puked on a 1998 game engine, and their little puke-babies had incestuous relations creating this amorphous multi-coloured mass with models that are more wooden than Pinocchio…

    • Lord Byte says:

      Not to mention that every single Postal game has been crap… Absolute utter crap, just getting by in sales because of shock-value… They were bad games, designed badly, their only rescue was to be as retarded and over the top as possible in the hopes of reaching the other side of retarded.
      The only reason they sold anything was because of media-attention and little kids wanting to be contrary…

    • Teddy Leach says:

      Well I enjoyed them.

    • papabear says:

      First Postal game was awesome sir. It opened new doors for my teenage brain back then.

    • ZIGS says:

      Isn’t this being in development since like… 2005? I know it changed the name from Postal: Catharsis to Postal 3 in 2006. The new Duke Nukem Forever?

    • Negativeland says:

      The only reason they sold anything was because of media-attention and little kids wanting to be contrary…

      You sound like you think you have it all figured out. But I have a different theory on why the games sold as much as they did: The hint is in the name of the town where the game is set: “Catharsis”.
      Personally, I found it fun to set random people on fire, start shootouts in shopping centers and blast an asshole cashier’s head off, etc. etc. etc. All stuff I wouldn’t get even close to doing in real life, but oddly liberating when you have a resetable sandbox for it, where nobody real gets harmed.
      It’s true that Postal 2 was technically rather cack, but I don’t remember running into any bugs.Postal 2 has aged badly though. I tried playing it a while back, but while the graphics were dated, but bearable when it came out, they look much too bad at this point.
      Postal 3 looks like it’ll be in the same point graphically, considering the technology of the time, as Postal 2 was when it came out.

    • MadTinkerer says:

      Y’know what? I actually liked Postal 2, despite it being a buggy mess. Gameplay wise, it was actually very interesting. Yeah, it tried a little too hard in the “our game is offensive! LOL!” department, but gameplay-wise it had a ton of interesting ideas that I wish were transplanted into a more serious/less buggy game.

      For example, it’s actually a cross-genre game: a FPS/Adventure game. There are adventure-y bits and there are combat bits and at any time one might be interrupted for the other depending on where you are and what you’re doing. How many other developers are even bothering to try to do that? Hell, it technically qualifies as an Immersive Sim, despite pretending to be just a lowbrow shooter. Raise your hand if you’ve complained recently that there aren’t enough Immersive Sims.

      Yeah, there is the trashy junk aspect of the game: some of the racial sterotypes are just plain… incorrect (Indians != Pakistanis), and the AI is horribly glitchy in places. But it’s like a crap-covered gold watch. Yeah there’s crap on it, but if you clean it off and open it up there’s a fascinating ticking mechanism inside.

      Plus, the first enemies you are likely to encounter (if you avoid provoking the police and don’t stumble across the terrorists early) are anti-videogame-violence protestors who protest violence in videogames with lethal force. That’s some nice irony there.

  2. FLBR says:

    Day 1 purchase for me! That has to be the funniest game trailer I’ve ever seen!

    “Under 17 cannot play it unless their parents don’t give a shit” lmao

  3. Teddy Leach says:

    VIOLENCE. VIOLENCE. VIOLENCE. STRIPPERS DOING WHAT STRIPPERS DO.

  4. cookie says:

    The rating pretty much sums it up.

  5. B0GiE-uk- says:

    Hyperactive lab monkeys! lmao!!!

  6. Kirioth says:

    Holy shit. That’s completely demented.

    I want it.

  7. McDan says:

    I think you could always safely say that this was going to be ‘interesting’, in the way that mass sadistic serial murder is interesting.

    Also I knew that one day the world would accept my idea of using a badger as a weapon, they’re so adorable and vicious!

    • Jim Rossignol says:

      Postal 2 has a badger as a weapon, I believe.

    • Unaco says:

      I don’t believe Postal 2 does have a Badger as a weapon Jim. There was a severed Cow’s head, and Kittens were used for certain things… but I don’t remember any Badgers.

    • Kieron Gillen says:

      The Cassandra Project had a bomb-badger model. Yet another reason why the game’s such a sad loss to the medium.

      KG

    • Negativeland says:

      Postal 2 has a badger as a weapon, I believe.

      No badgers in Postal 2. You might be remembering the relatively ancient tech demo for Postal 3. You could however use cats as silencers on shotguns in Postal 2. Which was nice.

    • Negativeland says:

      Ignore this post. Lack of reading comprehension caused a tangent…

    • BAReFOOt says:

      REALITY CHECK PROTIP: This is not a pipe!

      You know those sexual fantasies everyone of us has, that when we tried them, sucked. (Not in the good way. At all! ;) But when we just imagine them, they are awesome? Or even just eating, fighting and creation fantasies (you know, basic instincts) that would be shit in RL.

      That’s what this is. Something that is awesome when it’s just a fantasy.

      Can you tell the difference between games and reality, by the way?
      If not, please get some therapy, and leave us, who can, alone. (That includes our children, who also can.)

      Thanks. :)

  8. Rond says:

    I still don’t buy it after playing the alpha, or beta, or whatever it was beyond total crap.

  9. Kaira- says:

    Haha, oh wow. I don’t know if the game will be any good, but they just should keep making trailers like these. And then sell a DVD with all of them in it.

  10. skinlo says:

    Haha, looks quite cool :P

  11. Ricc says:

    Looks like it’s going to be a good entry into the series. I still think that the Postal 2 addon Apocalypse Weekend has some of the most interesting storytelling in gaming. Of course, it’s completely maniac, but features the developers in FMV cutscenes and levels of their office and pretend-mansion, frequent dream sequences and missions based on killing their RL ex-publisher. These guys do it for the fun.

  12. MartinNr5 says:

    Hate to buck the trend but I do not want this.

    • FLBR says:

      Why not? Are you under 17?

    • Tom OBedlam says:

      I’m with you, this just makes me feel a bit old. Postal was always too much like early South Parky for my tastes. Transgression is particularly funny for me, unless its kinda making a comment on what its transgressing. i.e. Stewart Lee’s comment on the madness of blasphemy laws in his twenty minute segment of 90s comedian which concludes with the line “then I vomited into the gaping anus of christ”. Not Mr Hanky the Christmas Poo or featuring Sarah Palin and Ron Jeremy in your game.

      I dunno, just not my cup of tea really, probably just too old for it now.

    • nofing says:

      Yep, definitely the age, because I remember quite enjoying Postal 2, but seeing this trailer and those bad puns… well maybe teenagers enjoy a game like this, but that’s not really the age group a game like this should cater to…

  13. int says:

    People who don’t look forward to P3 are deviant creeps who should be locked up I am afraid to say.

  14. Sangman says:

    Looks terrible if you ask me but thankfully nobody did.

    • FLBR says:

      @Sangman; Have you lost your sense of humour?

      I mean, the trailer shows a lone wolf who pulls into a parking bay on a Segway. : )

      @2:03 “Coming Soon” : )

    • Sangman says:

      My sense of humour is fine. What I’ve seen in this trailer is just not funny, to me, at all. LOL CATS WITH AIDS, LOL MONKEY FUCKING A GUY IN THE FACE LOLOL SO FUNNY etc.

      I find it kindof amazing that the same site, the same people who think the DNF demo is a piece of shit also think that this game looks great. Personally I’d say you guys have it backwards. :)

    • blind_boy_grunt says:

      i think i started getting annoyed by the trailer when it told me it had dark humour, while nothing remotely dark and/or funny was happening.

      (and i’m not saying i’m too mature or old for this game or that people who look forward to playing it are stupid. I just thought the trailer sucked)

  15. JackShandy says:

    Ok, I actually liked that. “PATHOS. INTRIGUE.”

  16. RegisteredUser says:

    Now imagine if these people had a competent engine, physics and art asset department.

    *dreams*

    Still love them for the spirit of these.

    • Kaira- says:

      Well, it will be interesting to see how Source can handle wide open levels (that is, if Postal 3 isn’t a tight railroad).

    • JackShandy says:

      While we’re at it why don’t we just fire everyone and replace them with valve. That would be fantastic.

    • Velvetmeds says:

      That’d be the worst disaster in videogame history

    • RegisteredUser says:

      Also I never really liked Half-Life.

      Did play through Postal 1, tried to like 2 but the gunplay was whack.

      Not sure if this came across, but similiar to my longing for a properly AAA sex sim, I really DO want stuff like Postal 3 to happen, and properly. Hence me imagining it with proper talent behind it, not in terms of taste or neutered nuttyness, but all things being equal just a “proper” game quality behind it all.

    • Davee says:

      You sure do have an interesting taste for games, I must say.

  17. Velvetmeds says:

    Better than DNF, most certainly.

    • YeOldeSnake says:

      Indeed , DNF is a cosolified generic shooter , this has free roaming and somewhat rpg elements.
      Been waiting for it since forever , not because i think the series to be of serious games , but because postal goes where no other game has been , pushing age ratings to the max and letting you have fun in your own way , due to free-roaming elements.
      Barging into other people’s homes , stealing stuff , purchasign stuff from other people , playing peacefully waiting in line to get your money from the bank or robbing the whole vault.
      It was demented and fun and this is why i think of it as a GREAT game , not just cuse i can shoot everyoen and pretend to have fun doing so

    • RegisteredUser says:

      Doing a “Pi” to your own skull is better than DNF.

  18. heretic says:

    How can you not like tazering people and making them lose bowel function, pouring gasoline on them, settings them on fire from a safe distance and then peeing on them to put the fire out. Followed by removing their heads with a shovel and playing football with it kicking it at cops.

    COME ON

  19. Drake Sigar says:

    “Violence, violence, violence!”

    That’s a lot of violence.

  20. I LIKE FOOD says:

    Looks more fun than DNF wich turned out to be crap.

  21. Rii says:

    Love the voiceover.

  22. John P says:

    This will be a terrible game I’m sure, but I have to admit I have a grudging respect for it. It’s doing its thing and it’s proud of that. More than you can say for a lot of games.

  23. abigbat says:

    Am I missing something? The Postal series totally baffles me; I don’t understand the demographic they’re going for, does this appeal to non-teens?

  24. thesundaybest says:

    AIDS-infected cats. You don’t say. (Quietly retches.)

  25. Zogtee says:

    Actually, I think Postal has become rather cowardly and uninteresting in it’s controversy. The first game had a small spark of danger to it and made you think “Whoa, can I really do this?” at times.

    The sequel was South Park meet Porky’s meet Weekend at Bernie’s with some guns and shite graphics thrown in. If they had really wanted to, they could easily have taken a couple of extra steps and been genuinely controversial, ie made a political stand that wasn’t “Go America!” or a religious one, or allowed for sexual violence (very controversial), etc, but they’re being careful not to go that far.

    This seems lazy and predictable, and just enough to make pre-teens (actual ones or retarded adults) giggle in glee to themselves. Hey, it worked the last time! Why should they try harder?

    • Omega Xi says:

      “This seems lazy and predictable, and just enough to make pre-teens (actual ones or retarded adults) giggle in glee to themselves.”

      So just because you don’t think it’s funny, anyone who does find it funny is a ‘retard’. Nice sentiment, if someone’s views don’t conform with my own I’ll just insult them.

    • RegisteredUser says:

      True.

      I would indeed admire a “Go Udo Kier on her ass” button to rape mutilated corpses after you’ve done all the gunningsplittingburningpeeing and whatnot, but really, at some point you’re just playing around with very red mashed potatoes.

      Not sure what boundaries we have left after violent mutilation of anything from infants to grannies outside of rape, and the asians kind of have us beat there. Maybe that’s why they didn’t “bother” with it?

  26. Zarunil says:

    This is the kind of game that will get 5 / 10 ratings, yet I’m sure I’ll have fun with it.

    Hopefully I can still pee, pour gasoline and set things on fire.

  27. SpakAttack says:

    Hysterical!

  28. Shadrach says:

    Always found Running With Scissors to be a brilliant studio name.

  29. Carra says:

    Damn. I read “The portal III trailer is interesting”.

  30. BrfngnlxYkzyxzK says:

    And this is the reason why Running With Scissors will always been a third-rate development house. Potty humor is fine if it’s funny to begin with, too bad that they can’t even get that right.

    The Postal series is a joke. It’s not good enough to attract the FPS market, and it’s controversial aspect is too weak for any major group to care.

    Oh, and Uwe Boll made a Postal movie. ‘Nuff Said.

  31. zugu says:

    “The Postal III Trailer Is Interesting”, “The Assassin’s Creed Revelations Trailer Is Cool”.

    What the fuck, RPS? Is this supposed to be quality journalism?

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