By Alec Meer on July 19th, 2011 at 3:03 pm.
Another mystery is why it just took me five tries to spell ‘mystery’ correctly. A better msytery is why some new and rather large new scenery objects have started showing up in selected Team Fortress 2 maps. They look like rocket ships, or possibly just rockets – but what do they mean? I put ‘mean’ in italics there, so it would sound like I was whining like a pitiful child who wants everything nownownow. Did it work?
All we know, via enterprising explorers of the fabled land that is the Source SDK, is that they might be called ‘Grockets.’ Or they might just be called ‘rockets’, and the g prefix is just a internal file naming system. In other words, WE KNOW NOTHING.
Team Fortress isn’t exactly unfamiliar with little ARGing ahead of a new feature unveiling, so it’s more than likely this heralds something. An alien invasion? The long-awaited Meet The Pyro? A new class? A tie-in promotion with another game? Hints about a future Valve title? Simply a delivery of new hats?
There sure are a lot of things I could put question marks after. I’ll stop now. You can follow the conspiracy theories on the Steam forum thread that dug this up.
19/07/2011 at 15:05 Teddy Leach says:
A third alien team, obviously.
EDIT: Morse Code is occasionally being played in the main menu. Someone needs to get on that.
19/07/2011 at 15:21 busfahrer says:
There was a CTF mod for Quake 3 called Tribal CTF that had 3 teams
19/07/2011 at 16:23 Tei says:
The original TeamFortress seems to supported 4 teams. I even remember seeing some “4forts” map. *cue to Reservoir Dogs music* I don’t think anyone wanted to play in the Mr.Brown team or Mr.Pee team.
19/07/2011 at 17:14 PanzerVaughn says:
Oh god i played 4fort once. That was not friendly to my 14yearold sniper-inept self.
19/07/2011 at 17:43 Malibu Stacey says:
In TFC Hunted technically had 3 teams. Snipers were Yellow, bodyguards were Red & the Civilian alone was Blue although the map was set up so that Blue & Red were allies so there was no way to grief. I also remember playing a CTF map which had a single Demoman on Green who was supposed to be the “leader” of Yellow in a similar manner.
19/07/2011 at 20:11 NateN says:
The 4 team TFC structure allowed for the “Hunted” structure, which I personally still miss. However, I’m not sure how to make the mental jump from hidden rockets to a 3rd team….
19/07/2011 at 16:23 Uglycat says:
Unreal Tournament had a 4 team mod that was a blast.
19/07/2011 at 17:36 shoptroll says:
That’s no mod. It was baked in natively. You’re probably thinking about the later iterations which dropped the green and yellow team colors.
19/07/2011 at 15:06 Ace Jon says:
The ‘g’ stands for green, and this precedes the 3-team update.
19/07/2011 at 15:14 SaVi says:
Don’t speak of such things, I still remember PVKII with the Vikings still attacking the Knights even though the Pirates were already hogging all the chests on their imba island.
19/07/2011 at 15:18 Kaira- says:
Wait wait wait.
What if ‘g’ stands for G-man?
19/07/2011 at 15:19 Teddy Leach says:
Someone theorised that on the Steam thread. But we have to remember that there were similar EP 3 theories last time.
19/07/2011 at 17:42 ResonanceCascade says:
Yes, G is for G-man. And if we re-arrange the word “rocket” we get the word “terock,” which can only mean one thing: Half Life 3 is actually a Turok game where you play as the G-man. Proof.
19/07/2011 at 17:51 liquidsoap89 says:
“What if ‘g’ stands for G-man?”
Or even “gnome”…
19/07/2011 at 19:27 G_Man_007 says:
I couldn’t posssssssibly comment…
20/07/2011 at 16:47 Anton says:
‘g’ is silent as in ‘gnome’. So it is pronounced as ‘rocket’
19/07/2011 at 15:10 Protagoras says:
EP THRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
(I put ‘EP THREE’ in italics there, so it would sound like I was whining like a pitiful child who wants everything nownownow. Did it work? Did VALVe hear my pleas?)
19/07/2011 at 15:17 Teddy Leach says:
If it is EP 3, I’ve lost a £5 bet.
19/07/2011 at 15:56 Jhoosier says:
With yourself?
19/07/2011 at 16:00 Teddy Leach says:
An editor of another gaming site, actually. Pfft, to you!
19/07/2011 at 15:10 Tei says:
It can’t be Kerbal Space Program in Steam, with achievements.
19/07/2011 at 15:12 Stranglove says:
I want that so very much.
19/07/2011 at 15:23 Dana says:
It wont happen, at least anytime soon. KSP is still in early beta.
19/07/2011 at 16:49 Ginger Yellow says:
Not even stabilisers could get that thing into orbit.
19/07/2011 at 15:10 Derppy says:
The rocket is actually a fish, which is sucking a fishing bobber.
Proof
19/07/2011 at 15:13 shoptroll says:
I can’t unsee it.
19/07/2011 at 15:45 Zogtee says:
Me neither. Goddammit, Derppy.
19/07/2011 at 16:03 Vague-rant says:
This man. This man is correct.
19/07/2011 at 17:56 Tams80 says:
Well, there we have it. Well partially.
19/07/2011 at 23:47 lurkalisk says:
SPACE FISH. How could I have been so blind?
20/07/2011 at 01:37 bear912 says:
What a catch!
19/07/2011 at 15:13 tobyjk says:
Space hats are coming
19/07/2011 at 15:13 Moni says:
My favourite random theory so far is: It’s a tie in with the re-entry of the space shuttle Atlantis on Thursday, and it will finally reveal the Pyro is an alien, and the Engineer will get some new hats.
19/07/2011 at 15:14 shoptroll says:
I was thinking it might be space shuttle and/or engineer related. They made a bit of a fuss about how the Engineer didn’t get much love in the Uber update. This might be “payback”.
19/07/2011 at 17:15 LionsPhil says:
The new Engineer wrench gives him a sentry gun which fires lobs big, smouldering, zeerust nuclear rockets across the map.
19/07/2011 at 21:13 Urthman says:
I thought the plan was for us all to dress up like apes for when the shuttle gets back.
19/07/2011 at 22:14 Scandalon says:
Urthman (nice name in context), you win the thread.
19/07/2011 at 15:15 hernismall says:
Despicable me 2
19/07/2011 at 15:16 CaspianRoach says:
This is probably a hint of Valve planning to invest into private space exploring program. Gabe wants to go to Mars!
19/07/2011 at 15:18 Tei says:
*wrong reply*
19/07/2011 at 15:19 Tei says:
It can’t be a free DLC for Portal 2 in the moon (with gravity puzzles).
19/07/2011 at 17:02 Wulf says:
Perhaps they’ve even brought in American McGee to work on this top-secret project!
…that was a long shot. Sorry.
19/07/2011 at 15:19 Flameberge says:
Maybe it’s Gnome Chompski from Episode 2 returning from being locked in a rocket by Gordon Freeman.
19/07/2011 at 20:58 Hoaxfish says:
yea G(nome)Rocket seems possible
19/07/2011 at 15:20 shoptroll says:
If this was a tie-in with another game, what would it be? Maybe that Gorg game that was just annouced? Seems a bit early for that. Spore 2: Revenge of the Grox?
Portal 2 DLC related? DotA 2? Alien Swarm DLC?
Maybe some space themed maps? 1950′s sci-fi moon bases would definitely fit the art style.
Probably not much to be worried about regardless, lest we all get disappointed when it turns out to just be some space helmets.
19/07/2011 at 17:14 tequibo says:
There is also a F-STOP, experimental prototype, that mentioned in “Portal 2 Last Hours”. They tried to make it into Portal 2, but ditched it, since it have no portals, and playtesters wanted portals and Chell, so they decided to make it to separate game.
19/07/2011 at 15:20 PanzerVaughn says:
There was some community that rose out of the Valve Arg, “The Indie ARG Project” whom is starting a thing RIGHT NOW. Led by “Leveraged” (who now has become Kolya). He’s supposibly involved with some manner of developer, it’d hardly be a indie game arg without any games. I wouldn’t doubt Valves involvement in some manner.
http://www.valvearg.com/secretproject is said to redirect to a different, more proper, less FAQ page within a week, right now the only canon i know of is Kolya’s characters twitter.
http://twitter.com/#!/komradekolya
19/07/2011 at 16:23 tstapp1026 says:
is it me, or does the first banner look like a russian Lego logo?
19/07/2011 at 15:24 Evil Otto says:
Pyro is an alien, obviously.
19/07/2011 at 15:33 JonClaw says:
I agree. This would make the pyro technically genderless.
19/07/2011 at 15:45 AndrewC says:
Life will find a way.
20/07/2011 at 01:39 bear912 says:
That is horrifyingly plausible.
20/07/2011 at 04:36 True-Light says:
Actually, I think the Pyro is a British robot.
20/07/2011 at 16:31 celewign says:
a sexy lady alien mmmm
19/07/2011 at 15:27 Dawngreeter says:
I think it’s something that’s supposed to get people talking about TF2.
19/07/2011 at 15:38 Nallen says:
I think you might be right ;)
19/07/2011 at 15:33 Teddy Leach says:
Agh! I made a comment about a third alien team, and it’s been deleted! I smell a conspiracy.
19/07/2011 at 15:36 Real Horrorshow says:
I hope its space maps. It would fit with the 60s motif.
19/07/2011 at 15:38 Rossi says:
Maybe an update to mark the end of the Space Shuttle program? Just a thought.
19/07/2011 at 15:40 zeroskill says:
I want that rocket….on my HEAD. LIKE A HAT!
19/07/2011 at 16:09 ankh says:
Typical TF2 player
19/07/2011 at 16:07 skalpadda says:
Headcrabs.
19/07/2011 at 17:54 LintMan says:
Headcrabs was my guess, also.
19/07/2011 at 16:25 dragonhunter21 says:
Looks like Engie started playing Kerbal Space Program- Home Edition.
19/07/2011 at 16:32 Sicram says:
It’s absolutely nothing! Nada, null, zip, zero. It’s just Valve trolling…
(Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised… those sneaky bastards)
19/07/2011 at 16:49 Jams O'Donnell says:
Female character models. Because ladies are from space.
19/07/2011 at 20:51 Stochastic says:
You know, I’m kind of shocked they haven’t done that already. I mean, sure, it would be a lot of work to create all new models, animate them, and do all the voicework, but that would generate so much press for TF2 and maybe get more female gamers to play.
19/07/2011 at 21:37 sketch117 says:
@ Stochastic
The modding community is a step ahead of ya!
http://www.gamebanana.com/skins/90529
http://www.gamebanana.com/skins/107782
http://www.gamebanana.com/skins/90532
http://www.gamebanana.com/skins/62031
http://www.gamebanana.com/skins/94177
http://www.gamebanana.com/skins/90545
19/07/2011 at 23:06 RodeoClown says:
They originally had female models too, but they were cut due to RAM restrictions on the XBOX.
19/07/2011 at 23:19 ResonanceCascade says:
I’d like to see a female heavy who looks exactly the same — including the 5 o’clock shadow — but with long, curly hair and red lipstick.
Every other class should have a proper female model though.
19/07/2011 at 17:09 nemryn says:
A new game mode where you have to drop off a garden gnome at the rocket!
19/07/2011 at 17:13 nemryn says:
Serious Mode: If there is a 3rd team, it won’t be GRN. Valve puts a lot of work into making sure that the characters, teams, etc are all immediately distinguishable, and red-green colorblindness is a thing. RNG or YLO are more likely.
19/07/2011 at 17:16 Koozer says:
Alien wave attack maps? Space maps? Astronaut helmets? Oh the possibilities!
Also, thinking up a ‘Meet the Pyro’ will be the hardest thing Valve have ever done.
19/07/2011 at 17:20 Anthile says:
100% certain it’s the Meet The Pyro and hopefully with a decent retool of his/her mechanics so that the flamethrower actually kills people.
19/07/2011 at 18:14 Baf says:
My experience is that the Pyro kills plenty of people. He just does it by air-blasting them off bridges into bottomless pits.
19/07/2011 at 18:40 Tomm says:
I’m a Pyro and I kill plenty of people thanks very much. Degreaser and Axestinguisher is a deadly combo.
19/07/2011 at 17:24 Davee says:
What?! I have been in the planning stage for an awesome spaceship-bound map for TF2 for a while now…
Way to steal my toughts, Valve. Again.
*puts tin foil hat back on*
19/07/2011 at 17:48 Noun says:
Didn’t Valve mention something about a boss battle game mode? Green giant alien Hale?
19/07/2011 at 18:03 Tei says:
*wrong reply*
19/07/2011 at 18:43 Robin_G says:
Another update. Another batch of gimmicky weapons and gaudy hats. Some of which may be space themed, mostly though, it will just be more polycount contest loser dregs. Hurrah, and I still haven’t even gotten most of the last batch thanks to the Random number generators that make buying overpriced virtual items seem like a good idea.
Seriously though, I hope its a new mode of some substance, like the one that has been teased for some time now. That would be neat.
19/07/2011 at 19:03 TheFlyingWooly says:
Moon base map?
19/07/2011 at 19:23 iWHUT says:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1roP52Py7s&feature=related
19/07/2011 at 19:26 sonicblastoise says:
Looks like my failed Kerbal Space Program Shuttle. So many people starting making and crashing shuttles that they are ending up in other games.
19/07/2011 at 20:49 Pie4Pigs says:
http://oi54.tinypic.com/r7993k.jpg
The grockets are fairly easy to access in gmod.
19/07/2011 at 21:11 Squishpoke says:
PYRO IS ALIEN
19/07/2011 at 21:33 Mike says:
*Goes out on a very precarious limb*
GROCKET = GNOME = Native Linux support (Ubuntu in particular).
20/07/2011 at 02:32 baby snot says:
Not going to happen any time soon.
19/07/2011 at 22:46 xrabohrok says:
Some artist somewhere in Valve HQ is reading this and yelling “I JUST THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUNNY CHRIST ALMIGHTY”.
19/07/2011 at 23:06 EveningNewbs says:
There had better be headcrabs pouring out of those rockets.
20/07/2011 at 00:20 Synesthesia says:
pyro is a beast. Degreaser, coupled with axtinguisher and a quickswitched flare gun that crits when the enemy is on fire, is just too much. You sir, are not a very good pyro.
or you just dont have a degreaser, just wait for it.
20/07/2011 at 01:17 TheGroovyMule says:
Like all great games, it’s going to be made better by setting it in space!
20/07/2011 at 01:17 FRIENDLYUNIT says:
Rockets? G for gorillas? I have two words to reveal it all for you people:
Poopy Joe.
20/07/2011 at 03:04 mda says:
“I put ‘mean’ in italics there, so it would sound like I was whining like a pitiful child who wants everything nownownow. Did it work?”
No. I thought ‘what does it mean‘ as in relation to life, the universe, and everything.
20/07/2011 at 09:22 Burning Man says:
You alls claim to British, but how is it that NONE of you have mentioned this song yet? – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__DrJI7mTHQ
A travesty, old chaps.
20/07/2011 at 11:32 Masked Dave says:
Except that in the original TFC, the third team *was* green. So they might want to stick to that.
I loved it when the Green team was available.
21/07/2011 at 01:36 J03YW says:
POOPY JOE IS COMING BACK