By RPS on September 20th, 2011 at 11:18 pm.
Jim: i am totally downloading it!
John: I’m totally downloading it too!
Jim: We are so cool.
UPDATE:
John: I’m totally playing.
Jim: I’m totally playing too!
Rock, Paper, Shotgun
Diableta: We Are Totally Playing It!
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Read our finest words
20/09/2011 at 23:19 Nighthood says:
I don’t understand any of this post.
20/09/2011 at 23:21 GenBanks says:
The Diablo 3 closed beta has started.
If you opted in using your Battle.net account and got lucky, then you will have gotten an invite (I didn’t!)
20/09/2011 at 23:24 Nighthood says:
Now I prefer when I was ignorant of the whole thing.
20/09/2011 at 23:19 Sleepymatt says:
One hopes your internet-pipes don’t block up.
21/09/2011 at 01:04 Sleepymatt says:
…and now you’re playing it: One hopes your internet-pipes don’t block up.
See what I did there? :)
21/09/2011 at 09:40 Ian says:
I see what you did there.
22/09/2011 at 00:42 Bassem says:
I don’t! Make me see!
20/09/2011 at 23:20 Dina says:
Fuckers.
21/09/2011 at 10:43 xenist says:
Their fuckery is indeed quite evident. Where’s MY key Blizzard?
20/09/2011 at 23:20 GenBanks says:
I hate both of you.
/bitter jealousy
20/09/2011 at 23:20 Anguy says:
no comprendo
20/09/2011 at 23:21 Navagon says:
This looks like a prelude to a running commentary on the game. Or is that just wishful thinking?
20/09/2011 at 23:22 Jeremy says:
I refuse to be happy for you.
20/09/2011 at 23:23 Azradesh says:
I hate you both. With a passion. Until I get in that is.
20/09/2011 at 23:57 KaputtChino says:
I just hate then! Not because they are allowed in and I’m not, but because they rub it in our FACES!
20/09/2011 at 23:23 Gothnak says:
I still don’t get the excitement of playing something FIRST, i just like to play it when it is WORKING PROPERLY :)…
So, the more beta testers before i get to play it later, the better :)…
20/09/2011 at 23:25 Jim Rossignol says:
First is best! It means you won the race.
20/09/2011 at 23:30 nubbuka says:
I too am not a fan of betas anymore.. after participating in a few, most of them alone without my real-time friends playing with me. Just random generated interweb people.
When the game finally is released I don’t have the passion to play it again =\
Although I don’t think that might have happened with Diablo ._______.
Have fun guys :P
20/09/2011 at 23:35 AndrewC says:
Starting first usually means you cheated.
20/09/2011 at 23:38 AndrewC says:
And finishing first means you are bad in bed.
Playing the Diablo III closed beta is like making love to a beautiful woman…
20/09/2011 at 23:46 Hoaxfish says:
while she’s in the middle of reconstructive surgery
21/09/2011 at 00:00 sinister agent says:
Indeed. Good sex is essentially brinkmanship.
21/09/2011 at 00:11 Eightball says:
So that’s why the ladies loved Kissinger…
21/09/2011 at 04:10 DigitalSignalX says:
Here’s a quick info-graphic to explain.
http://img716.imageshack.us/img716/8010/gamers2.jpg
20/09/2011 at 23:25 Tainted says:
Crushing disappointment in 3….2…..1….
(Secretly holding out hope that its not awful)
20/09/2011 at 23:25 meatshit says:
Now that’s just mean.
20/09/2011 at 23:26 jellydonut says:
i hate you guys
hate you
20/09/2011 at 23:26 man-eater chimp says:
Live impressions?
Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
20/09/2011 at 23:27 Hoaxfish says:
Is there an NDA on the beta?
20/09/2011 at 23:29 Azradesh says:
Nope, not at all.
20/09/2011 at 23:33 noilly says:
No, there’s already plenty of information and streams about the beta
20/09/2011 at 23:49 PanzerVaughn says:
I am avoiding all further information or coverage, because i consider that ‘ruining it’
I want to walk through pristine, unspoiled fields of murderous hellthings
21/09/2011 at 00:33 sinister agent says:
May I recommend Hull?
21/09/2011 at 00:54 Dozer says:
Ah, Hull. The only part of the United Kingdom to declare independence from the Post Office.
21/09/2011 at 03:15 hobbity_j says:
and BT
21/09/2011 at 11:40 Teddy Leach says:
It’s more that the post Office declared independence from US.
20/09/2011 at 23:28 pakoito says:
#nomad
20/09/2011 at 23:32 cmc5788 says:
Jerks!
20/09/2011 at 23:33 Jamesworkshop says:
I downloaded it too
days ago
can’t play it though
20/09/2011 at 23:35 KillahMate says:
I’m sure it will be a very polished game. Not so sure it will be in any way interesting.
21/09/2011 at 00:50 TillEulenspiegel says:
A nice summation of my thoughts about a lot of games, including all newer Blizzard titles.
I know what the vast, vast majority of reviewers will say; I could probably write a typical review right now, despite having never played the game. Blizzard’s goals are clear, and they’ll definitely achieve them. I just wish they had different goals.
20/09/2011 at 23:36 Maykael says:
Live blog a Co-Op playthrough!! You must!!! Please!!
21/09/2011 at 00:20 ostermei says:
Jim: “I clicked a monster. I clicked it again. I clicked it again. I clicked it again. It died. I clicked the loot.”
John: “I, too, am clicking a monster repeatedly. Now I, too, am clicking loot.”
Repeat as needed.
21/09/2011 at 01:40 Reefpirate says:
That’s the thing when you have a mouse for an input device… You end up clicking on things.
Counter-strike: “Ooh, I clicked on a bad guy. I clicked on another one. Now I’m trying to click on another one, but he’s moving.”
Rome: Total War: “I clicked on my army… I then clicked on an enemy army. I then clicked on one of my armies again. Then clicked on an enemy army.”
Basically, by describing Diablo that way is missing out on a lot of the depth of the game, ie. skill trees, various items and item combinations, tactics, timing, etc. I’m not that excited about Diablo at all, but let’s be fair if we’re going to criticize it.
21/09/2011 at 06:11 ostermei says:
As if anyone actual gives a crap about Diablo’s story, skills, etc, etc.
It’s all about the clicky lootfest, and anyone who tells you different is a damn dirty lying liar.
(Oh, and the obligatory mention that there are surely better less-DRM-y clicky lootfests out there/on the horizon.)
20/09/2011 at 23:38 Vivi says:
I opted into the real money auction house beta and just bought a key.
20/09/2011 at 23:47 skinlo says:
Apathy.
20/09/2011 at 23:48 sueyed says:
I hope your crops fail.
20/09/2011 at 23:50 PanzerVaughn says:
Then they will break your legs and burn you alive as a sacrifice to the bees! /wickerman
20/09/2011 at 23:57 westyfield says:
No, not the bees!
20/09/2011 at 23:51 ninjapirate says:
They gloat because they can.
20/09/2011 at 23:53 Thomas says:
No, if you were cool you would already have downloaded it like everyone else have for the last few weeks.
20/09/2011 at 23:57 Auspex says:
Not cool, man.
20/09/2011 at 23:58 westyfield says:
Damn, that’s cold.
21/09/2011 at 00:04 Lemming says:
WRONG. Cool people always arrive late to the party. FACT.
21/09/2011 at 06:57 Demiath says:
Downloading the beta files “illegally” does not somehow magically give anyone access to the beta. It’s all about being ready for the day when Blizzard, in their divine wisdom, decides that it is Time for You to Receive a Key. It’s like buying condoms because, well, you never know…
20/09/2011 at 23:57 dadioflex says:
I thought we all hated Diablo 3 now and were waiting to get into the Path of Exile Beta. So difficult to keep up.
21/09/2011 at 00:46 Nesetalis says:
>.> I got a path of exiles beta key…. i an content :3 -goes on with life and ignores d3-
20/09/2011 at 23:59 por3 says:
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
21/09/2011 at 00:07 aerozol says:
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
21/09/2011 at 00:16 Inglourious Badger says:
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
21/09/2011 at 00:32 Tatourmi says:
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
21/09/2011 at 00:37 Duffin says:
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
21/09/2011 at 00:42 Eclipse says:
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUuuuuuuu………
21/09/2011 at 01:00 Sarkhan Lol says:
n.
21/09/2011 at 02:32 Raziel_Alex says:
ky.
21/09/2011 at 02:49 Larkington says:
White boy.
21/09/2011 at 08:41 Jarenth says:
Play that music.
21/09/2011 at 00:05 Ertard says:
I’m cool as well!
*cool high five*
21/09/2011 at 00:07 wcaypahwat says:
Remember lads, second place is just the first loser.
:D
21/09/2011 at 00:12 Caddrel says:
Are these press invites, or the EU closed beta?
21/09/2011 at 00:19 Ertard says:
Press, but I don’t know for sure. See, I used to be press, and used my account then as well, so I doubt it’s just a random lucky thing. It’s the US Closed beta, or so my invite said anyway.
21/09/2011 at 03:17 DarkNoghri says:
According to ArsTechnica, this is a normal beta, but press are getting invitations in the first wave of invites.
21/09/2011 at 00:25 fenriz says:
eeeer does it have, like, puzzles or something about interacting with the ambient?
sorry for asking stuff about the actual game, didn’t mean to interrupt your envious ladies’ knitting club.
21/09/2011 at 00:40 mwoody says:
To get this thread back on topic…
Do you prefer a cross stitch or needlepoint?
21/09/2011 at 00:32 Craorach says:
I hate you guys…
.. actually, I’m not sure I’d even want to be in the beta… from what I’ve seen it’s basically just a demo, I don’t know what they think they are gonna test.
21/09/2011 at 01:12 Azradesh says:
Servers.
21/09/2011 at 00:33 bglamb says:
Reply fail
21/09/2011 at 00:33 Chris D says:
So, just to clarify, do we no longer care about the must always be online thing because actually it turns out it’s no big deal or because “Shut up! We’re playing Diablo 3 here.”?
21/09/2011 at 00:40 pipman3000 says:
Yes
21/09/2011 at 00:40 karry says:
Eh, you just know there will be a first week offline hack.
21/09/2011 at 00:42 mwoody says:
My reaction to Diablo 3 is roughly how I’d react if I found out they were releasing a pill to live forever… Then announced that it would be in suppository form.
I.e.: I’m still gonna get it, but I won’t pretend parts of it aren’t a pain in the ass.
21/09/2011 at 00:56 Dozer says:
Some people enjoy that kind of thing.
21/09/2011 at 01:06 Wulf says:
I still hate that Blizzard treats foreign people like scum, which means that anyone with a non-trivial amount of friends from the world over likely won’t be having any fun with this at all.
To me? Still a big deal.
Not excited. Waiting for Torchlight II. Which is obviously going to be better. (Artistically speaking it’s already looking better. :P)
21/09/2011 at 01:14 Azradesh says:
They’ve already got a basic server emulator up and running for the beta. At the moment all you can do is run around town though.
21/09/2011 at 02:17 FataMorganaPseudonym says:
What if it were a pill to live forever, but the only way it would work is that it first had to be soaked in vomit, urine, and feces, and that you had to be taking it constantly, you know, like always, and that if your supply ever faltered even for a bit, you’d be screwed? Would you still take it then? Because that’s a somewhat more apt metaphor for the always online requirement than merely having it shoved up your ass.
21/09/2011 at 04:56 Saxocat says:
That is possibly the least apt metaphor I’ve seen in a long while, FataMorgana. You seem to be overly stressed about this Diablo 3 business.
21/09/2011 at 14:17 pipman3000 says:
What if like you could eat vomit, urine, and feces to live forever but first you had to smear it all over some pill :D
21/09/2011 at 00:43 Berious says:
Damn you, damn you to heck!
21/09/2011 at 01:00 Wulf says:
Yes, but are you totally playing it?
21/09/2011 at 01:12 Isometric says:
Why the H didn’t I get a beta key. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME BLIZZARRRRRD. Hehe nah, well done chaps. I hope youse enjoy it.
21/09/2011 at 01:18 frenz0rz says:
TELL ME THINGS ABOUT IT RPS I MUST KNOW NOW
21/09/2011 at 01:33 Grot_Punter says:
If this was Border-Tribes, then I’d care.
Since it isn’t, I don’t.
This may also be due the fact that I can be included amongst those heathen bastards who never liked the first two. This is something I do not apologize for. So there.
*Begins dancing for no reason other than to appease his own fragile ego*
21/09/2011 at 01:42 Stormbane says:
What happened to all the online-only, real money hate? HUH?!
21/09/2011 at 02:07 johnpeat says:
I’m sure they’ll keep cultivating that as it’s the only thing which gets any serious level of reading around here :)
21/09/2011 at 01:51 ChrisN says:
Dear Jim and John,
I hate you.
Loves and kisses,
Chris
21/09/2011 at 02:11 FataMorganaPseudonym says:
Here’s to hoping that you beta guys have an abysmally horrible time dealing with the always online crap, such that Blizzard will realize what a turgid turd it is and thus remove it before the retail version is released.
21/09/2011 at 02:33 Raziel_Alex says:
/don’t care
Boring hacknslash.
21/09/2011 at 08:59 adonf says:
Yeah. Didn’t even know there was a 2.
21/09/2011 at 19:21 pipman3000 says:
boy these grapes sure are sour
21/09/2011 at 09:05 Zarunil says:
I urge you to spend a month’s salary on the in-game store, then post a Wot I Think.
21/09/2011 at 10:22 freeid says:
< green with envy
21/09/2011 at 13:36 Jim9137 says:
And here I was hoping Diableta would be a parody of Diablo where you commandeer skimpily clad succubus through seemingly impossible tasks of showing injustice to the forces of good.
21/09/2011 at 16:31 Arnulf says:
I hate you both.