By Adam Smith on October 27th, 2011 at 6:41 pm.
Full scream ahead! Ahem. Actually, I think they’re mostly diesels, but that should not distract from the fact that Trains Vs Zombies has just been released as DLC for Railworks 3. My mind is still boggling because I only just discovered that this is a thing that now exists. But it is true and to prove I am not deluded, observe the visual evidence below! You could also just follow the link above, but stick with me AND ENJOY THE RIDE BECAUSE THERE IS ALWAYS A POSSIBILITY THAT IT COULD BE YOUR LAST RIDE!
With a zombie plague in full swing, you find yourself in Oxford amongst a group of survivors, one of whom is The Professor. He has the entry code to a secret bunker beneath Paddington Station, and will lead you all to safety as long as you can drive everybody there! Starting out from Oxford Station, unexpected happenings along the way mean you will be in for a bumpy ride – and a few train changes! You need to get away quickly, as the zombies are hard at work ripping up the tracks, though with a little Halloween magic, a few missing pieces of track won’t stop you getting away…
Argh! I used to live in Oxford! It’s incredibly picturesque, except for almost every part of it that’s not owned by the university. What a horrible thing to happen in such a magical place. Who will think of the Young and Privileged?
Maybe this lady can help. No, wait. She “clearly wants us to derail somehow”. And she’s green! Oh, lummy! Out of the train! Across the station! We must find another train that is not similarly plagued by evil!
Noooo! This train is surrounded by hollowed-out pumpkins, the most evil of previously edible-emblems. Is there no escape?
Gah! Terror! Malignity! This train is aflame and surrounded by two of the casually strolling dead! Back to the other train, which I can identify by neither its engine nor its chassis being ignorant of such things if those are indeed things that it has. We’ll just have to step over the pumpkins, fiendishly carved as they are, and hop into the cabin. Then it’s drive-time.
OK, this is what we’re here for. Trains vs zombies. I’ve spent years in preparation for this moment, knowing that one day only my ability to maneuver a train along a rail could prevent the annihilation of Oxford (and possibly Paddington Station). Let’s just focus on the job at hand, out of the station, onto the track…
Oh, for crying out loud…
Flying trains, pumpkins and people with green skin. Do you want it? Do you? You can buy it here. Or check out the full Halloween Steam sale here.
27/10/2011 at 18:46 OJSlaughter says:
this… is…INCREDIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
27/10/2011 at 18:48 applecup says:
……what did I just read
28/10/2011 at 13:01 Crius says:
…. cannot be unread. Sadly.
27/10/2011 at 18:52 Lambchops says:
Wait . . . what . . . I’m in Oxford! Clearly I must prepare.
There, that should throw them off the scent, they’ll never know I’m testing the zombification chemical i’ve spent the last week brewing up in the lab.
Also if there’s a zombie outbreak I’m sure as hell not heading to Paddington where it’s really, really busy. Even if the flying train experience is oh so sorely tempting!
27/10/2011 at 20:23 MiniMatt says:
Oooh, I used to be Oxford too. At least Jude the Obscure pub is far from the train station.
28/10/2011 at 00:54 Gap Gen says:
I too have done that route several times. Although the Jude is only about 10 minutes walk from the station?
And yes, stellar marketing. Wonder how many people bought it just for this, with no interest in the original game.
27/10/2011 at 18:53 Enzo says:
Told you it was real!
Now somebody has to play it and post a Wot I Think.
27/10/2011 at 18:55 Dozer says:
Crap. I’m travelling to Paddington by train on Saturday. First time since 2008. I don’t relish the thought of needing to change to a replacement bus at Didcot Parkway due to zombies walking into trees and shaking the leaves onto the tracks.
28/10/2011 at 10:31 diebroken says:
Hang on… what kind of trees/leaves? ;)
28/10/2011 at 10:45 Punchbowled says:
Clearly, the wrong kind.
27/10/2011 at 19:12 johnpeat says:
Got to be the smartest bit of game marketting this year, surely??
27/10/2011 at 19:20 Tatourmi says:
Well, it DOES sound like a sort of lame cartoon halloween special so I’ll be tempted to say no, but that is only my opinion.
27/10/2011 at 21:50 hosndosn says:
Add zombies: Attract 3 million new customers for the Railworks franchise.
28/10/2011 at 08:31 kukouri says:
Does this actually make this a game now?
28/10/2011 at 09:45 johnpeat says:
@kukouri I dunno – define ‘game’ (we’ll be enjoying ourselves whilst you try)
27/10/2011 at 19:20 Mephisto says:
Will make announcements more interesting.
“The 07:20 service to King’s Cross is delayed due to entrails on the line”
27/10/2011 at 20:37 Frankie The Patrician[PF] says:
The 08:20 service from Oxford Central is delayed indefinitely due to one Adam Smith flying away with the last workable train left
27/10/2011 at 19:22 Lukasz says:
last picture reminds me of ET
and weird idea is weird but people who like train games are weird (except railroad tycoon. that was awesome)
27/10/2011 at 22:13 knifethrower says:
Reminds me of Galaxy Express 999
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gq-b_iNrQaQ
28/10/2011 at 08:33 TsunamiWombat says:
Wasn’t Captain Harlock in that?
27/10/2011 at 19:24 Deltadisco says:
Even taking into consideration the proximity to Halloween AND the never ending flood of zombie-based-entertainment – could anyone have actually predicted this?
This is so batshit insane that I’m not sure it could be anything other than awesome.
27/10/2011 at 20:32 Keymonk says:
My first reaction was utter disbelief. Then amusement. It’s amazingly awesome.
27/10/2011 at 19:28 Khann says:
Lie: I am scared.
27/10/2011 at 19:28 Rao Dao Zao says:
Sounds dead exciting, looks railly good.
27/10/2011 at 19:32 Khann says:
A sleeper hit for sure.
27/10/2011 at 19:33 phuzz says:
I see what choo did there.
27/10/2011 at 19:35 Khann says:
We must conductor ourselves with respect.
27/10/2011 at 19:40 Lord Custard Smingleigh says:
I was hoping for some good puns but I guess diesel have to do.
27/10/2011 at 19:40 The Hammer says:
Thomassing around, guys!
27/10/2011 at 19:46 WMain00 says:
We’ve derailed this topic somewhat.
27/10/2011 at 19:50 Man Raised by Puffins says:
Another terrible train-based pun and I fear I may come down with some form of mallardy.
27/10/2011 at 19:59 Stellar Duck says:
No chance of getting this back on track?
27/10/2011 at 20:08 The Hammer says:
We’re King’s Crossing into the absurd now…
27/10/2011 at 20:23 Cardinal says:
Chuffing hell…
27/10/2011 at 20:24 Tams80 says:
You’ve made me all sooty now. ¬.¬
27/10/2011 at 20:26 BooleanBob says:
Guys, don’t be so hard on these pun-merchants. They’re clearly just letting off steam.
27/10/2011 at 20:32 Cunzy1 1 says:
Is it available on steam?
27/10/2011 at 20:32 Navagon says:
I refuse to commute on these puns.
27/10/2011 at 20:38 Frankie The Patrician[PF] says:
Delay me, what a first class pun-service
27/10/2011 at 20:50 Blackcompany says:
This entire topic is on a fast track to hell….
27/10/2011 at 20:56 ThinkAndGrowWitcher says:
Is this just on PC? Or other platforms too?
27/10/2011 at 21:00 Shih Tzu says:
Tokaidon’t get this thread. If anyone Nozomi what’s going on, it’d be great if shinkansend me a message.
27/10/2011 at 21:01 Lambchops says:
You guys stole all the puns. It’s just not fare.
27/10/2011 at 21:03 The Hammer says:
I see that, in terms of puns, I have arrival in you, Lambchops.
27/10/2011 at 21:39 slick_101 says:
Do we have to pay extra during peak times?
27/10/2011 at 21:42 slick_101 says:
And because I couldn’t help myself……. Which of you guys will be the first to get there?
27/10/2011 at 21:47 felisc says:
i don’t understand your train of thought
27/10/2011 at 22:18 Grygus says:
This thread is loco! You guys don’t actually car about this game’s stock.
27/10/2011 at 23:07 Danny252 says:
The signals are clear, you lot are all off the rails.
27/10/2011 at 23:10 Tatourmi says:
Just jumping on the pun bandwagon, don’t mind me.
27/10/2011 at 23:51 Frankie The Patrician[PF] says:
Just posting in the loco….wait for it….MOTIVE thread!
28/10/2011 at 00:40 mudlark says:
You guys have crossed a line with this topic. It’s time for someone with the proper training to track you all down and punch your tickets.
28/10/2011 at 04:03 BeamSplashX says:
It looks like the jokers are railroading our discussion of the game once more.
28/10/2011 at 04:51 Raiyan 1.0 says:
RPS commentary is so predictable. Start a topic. Make puns.
It’s like all your behavior is rail-roaded.
28/10/2011 at 04:55 bear912 says:
I’ll be trammed if I know how you all stand such verbal caboose.
28/10/2011 at 09:45 Frankie The Patrician[PF] says:
A TRAIN!
28/10/2011 at 10:28 Vexing Vision says:
This already is quite the trainwreck, isn’t it.
28/10/2011 at 10:37 Rao Dao Zao says:
Aye, we’ll need to train hard to get better.
28/10/2011 at 11:05 GameOverMan says:
Frank(ly), this thread seems to be unstoppable.
28/10/2011 at 12:01 Devenger says:
You could find me to have placed a pun in this comment, but that would be a miscarriage of justice. Possibly.
28/10/2011 at 13:42 Stellar Duck says:
This thread is the laughing stock of bogey men. End of the line, I hope.
28/10/2011 at 18:32 The Colonel says:
@Stellar Duck: The double pun! I was trying to find a way of making “Blood and Custard” into a halloween pun but I can’t sodor-n’t criticise me.
27/10/2011 at 21:33 tootoid says:
I often play simulators to practice for situations just like this. This DLC is going to improve the accuracy of my test results no end!
Incidentally, if the zombie apocalypse does come and you see me in a sweaty panic in the cab of a train, my current data suggests that you have approximately 3 minutes to find a way onto the train before I leave. You then have a leisurely 7-8 minutes to get to the cab and take over before I derail the train and kill us all.
27/10/2011 at 21:38 slick_101 says:
mmmmmmmmmmmm green peoples
27/10/2011 at 22:45 Zepp says:
now waiting for ships vs zombies
27/10/2011 at 23:17 Tatourmi says:
I don’t really see how zombie could pull that one out.
27/10/2011 at 23:38 BathroomCitizen says:
Green is the color of envy!
27/10/2011 at 23:50 dejoh says:
Not to get off track, but….Try the latest version of RailWorks 3. Stunning graphics ,shadows and
great renditions of rolling stock.
27/10/2011 at 23:58 Frankie The Patrician[PF] says:
Good point, your conducting skills are great (I lost my ticket, though)
27/10/2011 at 23:56 Frankie The Patrician[PF] says:
“This train is aflame and surrounded by two of the casually strolling dead!”
- Traintastic, I laughed so hard my dinner wagon got disconnected
28/10/2011 at 00:23 .backslash says:
First I discover the existence of deep-fried Mars bars earlier today, now this… Clearly the Universe has decided to end whatever vestiges there are left of my sanity.
28/10/2011 at 08:36 TsunamiWombat says:
They also deep fry twinkies and oreo’s.
DID I JUST BLOW YOUR MIND?
28/10/2011 at 03:22 pupsikaso says:
Everyone is commenting how awesome it is, but how many have actually bought the DLC? Or even the game itself yet?
28/10/2011 at 10:08 neolith says:
Best. Headline. Ever.
28/10/2011 at 18:12 Bodylotion says:
the question is who actually owns “Railworks” ?
30/03/2012 at 08:34 JohnnieW1336 says:
vi cam tay
I’ve said before that if that massive Railworks DLC pack goes up for sale again, I’ll buy it without regard for how ridiculous that might be.
I may have to cave and buy this piece of DLC now, though, and leave the rest for later. It’s too ridiculous for me to not have it. Every time I see a Railworks game on Steam I do wonder if there’s an audience out there that goes for a train simulator. Evidently there is, or they wouldn’t keep releasing products. I assume there’s more to it than I realize…?
22/10/2012 at 18:46 Arkadion says:
Well, I think this game is full of train-eating motherf**ers!
Did I mean brain? NO!
Simulation at its best.
22/10/2012 at 18:47 Arkadion says:
1. Release a game.
2. Release a DLC featuring ZOMBIES for the mentioned game.
3. ???
4. PROFIT!