Rock, Paper, Shotgun

Ubi’s techno-shooter Ghost Recon: Future Soldier had rather disappeared off the release radar, but it’s popped up again with a bright blip reading “March 2012″. Alec took a look at the game for Eurogamer early last year, so we can probably expect to have changed a bit since then. What won’t have changed is the game being all about tactical hi-tech combat with a dose of stealth. It could be refreshing, if done right.

Hey, we’ve got a recycled E3 trailer below. That is something you can watch.
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What mad form of ultraviolence will I be introduced to next, I often wonder. This time it’s quad wielding in The Darkness 2, making me realise it wasn’t long ago that dual wielding was an exciting prospect thought to be possible only in John Woo films, but then Rise of the Triad came along with its guns akimbo and ludicrous gibs. Judging by this new video, The Darkness 2 won’t disappoint on either the gore or the preposterous death-dealing fronts. With a gun in each hand and murderous tentacles sprouting from his flesh, Jackie Estacado can rip the door off a car and cut a goon’s face off with it while firing two automatic weapons, or ensnare an unruly gangsster, casually lob him into the air, and then fill him with bullets before he hits the floor. If you don’t believe these things are possible, watch and learn.

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While knickers are being busily twisted about whether claiming The Binding of Isaac as in any way qualifies as a roguelike is right up there with the purest, most horrifying, most unforgivable evil of calling a real-time tactics game a real-time strategy game, let’s also look at something that does fit that genre without outrage. This one’s turn-based and everything!

Cardinal Quest, which impressed our Mr Smith just over a month ago, is spending 24 hours in the happy land of no-pennies. To qualify for this most absolute of discounts, you’ll need to read this tweet from CQ’s creator, Ido Yehieli and apply the code wherein when you go as if to purchase the game. That’s it! Trailer below if you’re having a dither.
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World War II-themed grand strategy game as digital collectible card game? It’s both a deeply weird idea and rather an ingenious one, seeing as it encourages thinking extremely tactically about the all-too-slim military resources you have in a bitter battle against an enemy general. I suspect I’d be rubbish at it, as my only considered tactic would be “play the tank card! And again! And again! The tank card! Again!” Fortunately, Paradox have put out some tutorial videos, so you can hear from far wiser minds than mine.

The free-to-play (funded by booster pack transactions, of course), browser-based game is now open to any and all players, but unfortunately the site seems to be having a bit of a wobble at the moment, so you may need to remember what patience is. What is patience? It’s a virtue. It’s also FOR THE WEAK. F5, F5, F5, F5, F5, F5, F5, F5, F5, F5, F5, F5, F5, F5…

Update: site now working fine, I’m told.
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A few people have nudged and winked us in the direction of Rockin’ Android’s (and there’s a name they must sort of regret, given they specialise in PC and PSN titles) Westernified J-indie bullet hell series Gundemonium Collection, which recently released on Steam. I quietly sneered my way through the big -eyed, Renaissance-frock loading screens and menus, and was rewarded by something delightfully ridiculous on the other side of it. Its base look might clearly declare which nation it orginates from, but it wastes no time in becoming absolutely batshit crazy, both in terms of the enemies it throws at you and in the powers it’s granting your floating gunwoman.
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When Dead Island’s Bloodbath Arena DLC was announced I jested that it might be delayed ’til 2017. Well, I’m guessing we’ll see it before 2017, but the content has indeed been delayed. Rather than concentrating on finishing up the horde mode and extra equipment that the DLC’s set to offer, Techland are concentrating on squashing the bugs in the core game. Releasing a game with technical issues is no good thing but at least they’re working to fix things, which is far more important than shipping what sounds like a fairly negligible expansion. Using my powers of sarcastic clairvoyancy, my next prediction is that the recently announced Dead Island movie, if it does ever materialise, will not in any way resemble the video below.

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Some days it’s hard to coax a smile out of me, usually because I’ve inadvertently pondered the state of the world rather than concentrating on my cocoon of make-believe. There were moments this morning when I thought this might be one such day and that I’d end up typing furious screeds about every terrible piece of news I could find. But the I saw the new trailer for Voxatron, which made everything seem just fine. Better than fine. We’ve had our eyes on this for a while but this is the first new footage since April and it comes with the announcement that the alpha will be available soon for anyone willing to preorder. Take a look.

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And again! A not entirely industry-representative yet unquestionably fascinating/depressing look at what comprised the top ten PC game sales for Steam compared to UK retail over the last week. Will The Sims’ dominance of retail continue unabated? (Obviously). Will there be any surprise returns to the Steam top ten? (Yeah, actually). Read on to find out the answers to both these questions and more, as long as those questions concern the chart-placing of contemporary PC games. If you want to find out the answer to what the Queen had for breakfast this morning or where Muammar Gaddafi is hiding, I really cannot recommend reading the rest of this post.
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Saints Row: The Third seems a bit more mad every time I see it and the latest announcement concerning its release is one of the maddest things of all. Showing a keen satirical sensibility, this declaration has emerged from the neon-lit, glitterball-strewn funhouse that is Saints Row HQ:

THQ and Volition announced that the PC version of Saints Row: The Third is scheduled to release exactly when they said it would. Developed in-house at Volition in Champaign, IL and powered by Steam, Saints Row: The Third on PC is not scheduled to be delayed by any unforeseen development problems, shipping issues, inclement weather, or zombie apocalypse. As such, it remains on track for a November 15 release, exactly when we said it would.

In a perfect world, this would not be necessary or amusing, but we live in an imperfect world and those few words sadly show that Volition are paying more attention to their PC audience than some companies seem to do throughout an entire development cycle.
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