Valve Drops Mad Beats Into TF2, Adds A Boombox

By Craig Pearson on February 10th, 2012 at 10:00 am.

I'll bet the Vengaboys sound amazing on that thing.

Uh-uh they did-uhnt. Valve did not just add a boombox to Team Fortress 2 that plays sounds whenever a Scout taunts… I think they did. Just let me check the server over here [opens server door] WELL, NOW I CAN’T HEAR AND I NEED TO CHANGE MY PANTS. BUT I CAN CONFIRM THAT THEY WENT THERE. They’ve released a paid for (£6.99! – too rich for my roots) community item called the “Boston Boom-Bringer“. Whenever the Scout taunts, it’ll play one of four phat beats. If you want to prepare yourself for the aural wreckage that the game’s about to throw at you, there’s a video below.

But that’s not all. Alongside these classic sound bombs that Valve be dropping, the Steam Workshop will now be accepting “sound device” uploads. At last, my dream of a Spylophone will finally become a reality.

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64 Comments »

  1. mrwout says:

    I actually googled “Spylophone”….and then it hit me….

  2. Nighthood says:

    Obligatory “I preferred vanilla” comment.

  3. luckystriker says:

    OK, I loved the tag, “Fear of a Scout Planet.” Old skool props RPS.

  4. mondomau says:

    £6.99? Really? I’m not getting into the whole purity of the game thing, but I have to say that kind of gouging seems a bit…off.

    • Asskicker says:

      Nobody is forcing you to pay for it ;)

    • Prime says:

      …but he’s still allowed to express the opinion, right? I happen to agree. £6.99 for that? There are really good games out there you could buy for that. Taking the jarate, surely?

    • sneetch says:

      The prices there tend to take the jarate anyway but people must be willing to pay for them. I can understand that, if TF2 takes up a major part of your gaming time and as a result you don’t spend your money on new games then why not spend some on TF2 hats? Something new within the already familiar.

      Apparently some people are willing to pay $20-30 or so for the pre-order only hats that come out all the time (normally instead of a more-useful-to-me 10% discount).

      http://wiki.teamfortress.com/wiki/Mann_Co_Store_Pricelist

    • Smarag says:

      Usually nobody buys at shop prices anyways. There are a lot of people investing a lot of money into tf2. Unusual hats start at $30-40 and the most expensive ones are $2000-3000 (Burning Team Captain and Cloudy Moon Team Captain).

    • Bhazor says:

      Milking your most loyal fans? Valve is truly turning into a publisher.

  5. The Tupper says:

    I’ve never enjoyed TF2 and I always feel as if I must therefore be missing something – something important.

    With the space taken up by it on my hard disc ever-increasing, however, I’m gonna take this opportunity to call it a day and uninstall the thing. It’s just not for me.

    • Syra says:

      I can only agree, I uninstalled it a while ago, I’ve never quite felt it.

    • SiHy_ says:

      Different strokes my friend. Personally I like to have a go every now and then but it will never be my most played game.

    • thegooseking says:

      I find it pretty funny that I have the Grizzled Veteran badge despite the fact that I’ve apparently played the game for a total of two hours since release (since it’s based on when you first played it, not how much you’ve played it).

      Thing is, I did enjoy those two hours; I just didn’t enjoy them enough for the game to have precedence over other games.

    • ado says:

      TF2 has been the only game that I haven’t uninstalled since I got my PC (3 years now). I always return to this game from time to time.

    • Garoshi says:

      Yeah, i feel tribes is a much better game. I played my first match of tf2 in ages and the first game had an aimbot lol

  6. Bostec says:

    Man this was the big secret? What a let down, I was hoping for a new game mode maybe or a meet the pryo but na more stuff for the ever increasing bloated storefront. Dissapointed but not suprised.

  7. iARDAs says:

    Not many people is playing this game anymore I suppose.

    This could be a GOOD thing for TF2 haters
    BAD thing for TF2 lovers
    and an AVERAGE thing for people whom dont care.

    That being said, I really have no time for Tf2 over when there is Skyrim. BF3, BC2,

  8. Nimic says:

    Oh TF2, how I miss you… I even thought most of the class updates were good, and added to the game, but at some point they just went off into loony town. I just can’t look at a picture of TF2 anymore without thinking of the (I believe it was) developer commentary, where they made it perfectly clear that the main point of the graphic style was that it should be clean and clear, and that one cursory glance at a silhouette should leave you no doubt which class it was.

    I’d love to play TF2 again, but I won’t.

  9. HermitUK says:

    Or you could just use HLSS or HLDJ. An endless stream of sound abuse awaits your enemies. For free.

  10. Text_Fish says:

    Just what TF2 needed; MORE ways for people not to actually play the game!

  11. Serge says:

    I’m the only one who is worried about DOTA 2 and (more important) CS:GO?

    What will they do to them after the commercial success of TF2 “business model”.

    • bear912 says:

      I’m certainly not worried. Valve understands tone. If Dota 2 uses a free-to-play model, they’ll need some way of monetizing that, but my distinct impression is that Counter-Strike will remain the srs bsns that it has always been. They’ve talked about the fact that certain business models do not fit with certain games, i.e. a free-to-play Half-Life and Counter-Strike make no real sense. TF2, on the other hand, has always been a bit whimsical, and the profusion of cosmetic items in the game has actually become part of the game’s humor. I guess it’s possible that they’d monetize some certain player skins for Counter-Strike: Global Offensive, but I think they’re clever enough to realize it’s a poor idea.

  12. CedaVelja says:

    As long as people keep buy things like this you can be damn sure that Half Life 3 will never see the light of day.

    • HermitUK says:

      This is the same price as HL2, and £1 more expensive than Ep1 or Ep2. You can hardly blame Valve if people will part with that much cash for something whipped up by an artist one Friday afternoon.

      This also means HL3 will have ingame purchases for designer glasses and beard dyes.

    • bear912 says:

      “… if people will part with that much cash for something whipped up by an artist one Friday afternoon. a community member who will be getting paid royalties for his work.”

      Fixed.

      It’s a two-way street. Valve aren’t selling items purely to fill their own grain silos with cash. They’re also providing a way for people who contribute content to their game to be handsomely rewarded. It’s surely bringing plenty of income to Valve, too, but they’re not the only ones who benefit.

    • CedaVelja says:

      I am sure that he gets something, that something is probably pocket change compared to the kind of money they make of it.

      It annoys the hell out of me to see things like this damage gaming and there isnt a thing anyone can do about it.

      There will always be stupid people and there will always be people ready to take advantage of them.

    • bear912 says:

      “I am sure that he gets something, that something is probably pocket change compared to the kind of money they make of it.”
      I have no idea how much of a cut Valve takes on the sale, but I wouldn’t be entirely sure that the content creators are only making pocket change.

  13. Heliocentric says:

    How do I turn off all this bullshit and play the game I paid money for?

    • Rymdkejsaren says:

      This.

      I still feel cheated because I payed for this game, and now Valve have been spending the last 2 years laughing in my face as they completely destroy it. Once upon a time it was one of my absolute favourite games. I logged in about half a year ago and what I saw made me cry, so I am not sure what my reaction would be today.

    • Jahnz says:

      “Look, TF2, we’ve just grown apart. This happens. It’s not you, it’s me. I’ve moved on with my life, I’m…I’m seeing other games now. But this doesn’t mean that we can’t stay friends. We’ll always have 2Fort.”

      If you think that TF2 was awesome back in the day and is no longer so awesome then that is unfortunate, but that is what happens sometimes to an online game. I never really liked Day of Defeat:Source as much as the original for instance.

    • ankh says:

      Jahnz you are not making any sense. I paid for this game! Now they made it free and thus crappy in order to make money out of the freeness. Wait.. now I’m not making any sense.

    • phuzz says:

      “How do I turn off all this bullshit and play the game I paid money for?”
      Search for ‘Vanilla’ servers. You’re welcome.

    • sneetch says:

      That’s not what vanilla means.

    • PopeJamal says:

      Here’s my interpretation of the problem at hand:

      All the other shooters I purchased in 2007 haven’t changed at all since they were released. They were/are static products.

      Anyone who purchased TF2 in 2007 is now presented with a game that’s noticeably different than the one they paid for. And the “original” version doesn’t exist anymore. This is a relatively new phenomenon, this “ever patching” software thing. Similarly, I have pieces of software I purchased for my iphone that have changed radically since the time I purchased them. This didn’t happen in the “good old days”.

      Now give me back my game and get off my lawn!

  14. Limey says:

    Looks like a bit of fun. I like it.

  15. trigonometryhappy says:

    Who in the four seasons would want a floating fire above their head. It just looks like a glitch.

  16. DXN says:

    I do like that they’ve expanded the game, and ‘core’ new weapons like the demosword, kritzkrieg, wrangler, direct hit etc. are a good way for people to tailor loadouts to styles. Also, even with the new hats and whatnot, it’s still very easy to tell silhouettes apart if you’ve been playing a while. But yeah, even for me (about 500 hours clocked), the really maximalist trend that’s setting in, with flaming hats, badges, gewgaws, holiday sets, costume sets, cross-marketing sets, and literally tinsel and flashing lights — and especially items that break the ‘red vs blue’ colour code — is getting to be a bit much.

    But I don’t blame Valve at all – there’s clearly a massive market for this stuff, and though I don’t pay for items I have been pleased with trading for some rare items, or ones I just couldn’t find randomly, with scrap metal (which you get over time). Even if I abandoned the game tomorrow, I’ve still gotten ridiculously good value for money from it. But I have to say, I do really like it when a server loses connection to steam and you’re restricted to true-vanilla weapons and no hats, even if it leads to a few minor balancing issues.

  17. dethtoll says:

    I was actually thinking of maybe reinstalling.

    Now I never will.

  18. vecuccio says:

    Does anyone still play TFC ?? I didn’t even realize it was still going.
    Only an insane idiot would PAY for worthless DLC like this.

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