Lair Liar: Keep Your Word To Complete Promises

By Craig Pearson on February 22nd, 2012 at 11:43 am.

Can you be trusted?
Being a notorious liar has gave me many opportunities in life: my zeppelin is made of gold, my cat is the last of its species, and I’m typing this from the top of Skull Mountain. But it also made playing increpare’s tiny, dungeon crawler Promises really tough, as you need to keep your promises to snatch the keys to complete the game. I don’t want to spoil it, as there’s only a minute’s worth of game here and because I’m essentially a nice person with some flaws, so instead I’ll write some more lies. In Promises you fight a mega-copter made of the ghosts of old tanks, and if you Google the name of the game three times in a row there’s a small chance the rapture will occur. Look, just play it. I promise I’ll tell the truth below.

It took me a few attempts to get the sequence correct. It’s interesting because the nature of the game, as far as I could tell, means discovering exactly what promise I had to break . I think there’s only way of doing it, which involves talking to the guy at the top first, following his instructions and move to the right most guy, then to the guy on the far left. He’s the guy you break the promise to. He’s the one that you hurt. I made a video walkthrough, slightly satirising other breakthroughs by being short and rubbish. Behold!

Maybe I’m getting older and nicer, but on the unseen playthroughs, I did everything I could to avoid breaking that promise. In the end, I had to, and now I feel bad. Can you stop doing that to me now, games? Please?

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22 Comments »

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  1. The First Door says:

    Don’t you have to break the promise to all of them in the end? I mean you have to move east and you have to move down twice in a row to get back to the doors…

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      Kelron says:

      I assume that’s deliberate. It’s art or something.

    • westyfield says:

      Yeah, you can’t avoid breaking any of them. I assume the point is that if he breaks these promises, what’s to say he won’t break his promise to the girl, which would be a decent point if it weren’t utter bullcrap.

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      Craig Pearson says:

      Good point. Now I feel ten times worse.

    • Ridnarhtim says:

      I didn’t make the promise at the end. I will not be tied down.

    • The First Door says:

      Well, now I feel bad too! Maybe Phillip will help repair any damage I’ve done?

    • ScorpionWasp says:

      I think the entire point is that honest, truthful people never get the girl to begin with.

  2. CMaster says:

    You can go to the guy on the right first as well. Then of course, once you have all the keys you break all the promises. The girl doesnt seem to care though.

    • Ridnarhtim says:

      How did you beat it by talking to the guy on the right first? I can’t figure out a way to do that.

    • CMaster says:

      Yeah, I thought that I had done that, but now I don’t see how I ever could have, so I take that statement back.

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      Kelron says:

      I did, but I think it was bugged. The guy on the left didn’t seem to care that I’d moved east and broken my promise.

    • Veracity says:

      You can start with right and move to left via top without having yet moved east or in the same direction twice after promising not to.

      It’s a mildly amusing illustration of what people actually do with NPCs, I suppose. Mostly it’s just good that it takes less than a minute to play.

  3. Temple says:

    Internet has a lot to answer for: I thought you said the raptor would occur
    Maybe if I google it 4 times…

  4. Inigo says:

    I liked the mega-copter idea more.

  5. caddyB says:

    Clever little game. Keep away from your girlfriend.

  6. InternetBatman says:

    Kinda hamfisted. I hate when videogames force you to do something or deny progression and then try to make a point out of it. The worst offender was Bioshock.

    • Quasar says:

      Totally. I wanted a renegade option, in which I kick all three of the fussy pricks in the balls and steal their damn keys anyway.

      Good puzzle, though.

  7. Shadowcat says:

    The “do not at any point in the future walk on the same spot twice” promise is extremely poorly worded.

    What it actually means is “do not at any point in the future walk on a marked spot” (which of course includes all the spots that you had walked on in the past).

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      kavika says:

      I think the spots starting when you begin playing more than make up for it…

      Apparently you also were born in that cave.

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    kavika says:

    All the promises in this game are inane. I think that’s the point. They probably want you to extrapolate that to infinity as well.

  9. Frosty840 says:

    I made no promises, took no keys, didn’t finish the game.

    Do I win?