But What *Is* A Diablo III, Anyway?

By Jim Rossignol on May 14th, 2012 at 5:00 pm.

We just don't know.
I’ve simply got no idea. Do you know? Or you, Steve? Perhaps I’ll ask John. “I’ve no answer for you,” says John. “It should remain a mystery, like magnets.” See, no one actually knows. It’s convenient then, that Blizzard should have put out an “introduction to Diablo III” video (via VG247) for me to post below. That explains it. That explains it right up.

Related news: Diablo III will be playable – via mandatory internet! – tonight from midnight Imperial London time. So that might answer some more questions.

Come on then, let’s have it. Who’s being what class?

I am, of course, going to be the handsome, proud barbarian. (And in the game!)

, .

206 Comments »

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  1. Brun says:

    Wizard here.

    Yes, yes, always-on internet is bad. But I like playing fun games, and I won’t let that stop me, even if it goes against my principles.

    • Steven Hutton says:

      I feel the same way about killing people’s pets.

      • Syra says:

        I feel the same way about reading all the “I’m too cool for school so I won’t be playing diablo3″ comments below.

    • kikito says:

      Always on internet + shiny shiny colors is too much for me to bear.

      • fish99 says:

        Did you play the beta, because they did tone the colour down since the early footage.

        • yoansug says:

          http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=70442797

          That sounds literally like something Chris Traeger would say. Now I imagine a Chris Traeger barbarian-character. That might finally be a reason to buy Diablo 3, come to think of it.

          • fish99 says:

            huh? and what’s with the spam?

          • Premium User Badge

            Steed says:

            Your spammers are so much better than at PCGamer, very well played with the hidden links. They’ve taken the time to look at the article, and post something topical and normally quite reasonable.

            Soon the spammers will leave completely valid comments which genuinely add to the discussion, and just plop a link at the bottom in case you fancy a virus or two for pudding.

  2. Squirrelfanatic says:

    I’ll be the guy that is constantly battling other players in PVP… oh wait.

    • aliksy says:

      EW, PVP. I’m glad it’s not in. If I never hear another “$thing is OP!” or other pvp-centered whining, I’ll be happier.

      • Squirrelfanatic says:

        Yeah. PVP was the only thing that kept D2 interesting, as PVE just didn’t provide any challenge. Baalruns, anyone? One can only hope that this will be different in the new game.

        • f1x says:

          Are you sure you played through Hell difficulty?

          PVP, you mean the same pvp that was incredibly unbalanced and broken, full of hackers, exploiters and ebayers?

          Ah, yes…right.

          • Squirrelfanatic says:

            Hell wasn’t really hard, you just had to cancel the negative resistances. And yes, the very PVP you described. Duelling was more fun than running… sorry – teleporting down the same corridors again and again and again and again and again and again.

          • Mordsung says:

            Once you’ve PvP’d for long enough and made it your primary method of playing games, all AI ceases to be challenging.

            I barely even play single player games anymore because it just feels like target shooting.

          • vodkarn says:

            So a developer inability to balance a game and prevent large scale hacking means that an entire system of play should be disregarded, and a game is ‘better’ for not have that entire thing.

            Got it.

          • f1x says:

            I didnt say it had to be disregarded because of hacks,

            my point is that I didn’t remember it to be that glorious, thats all

      • Nevard says:

        PvP’s not totally gone though, they’re adding it in a post-launch patch

    • WrongThinker says:

      But PvP is mentioned in the video… did you watch the video? There are dedicated PvP arenas. While you won’t be able to gank noobs, you’ll be able to fight opponents who are legitimately interested in fighting back, which frankly seems much more interesting to me.

      • Squirrelfanatic says:

        Blizzard has announced that there will be no PVP in the game on launch date.

  3. woodsey says:

    Eugh, all my co-op buddies will be locking themselves away to play this for months on end then.

    I, meanwhile, shall stand alone in the rain, proudly waving my endlessly witty anti-Always-Online DRM placards.

    • Fiwer says:

      Aren’t you being hypocritical by posting on RPS, given that they have the same always-online DRM scheme as Diablo 3?

      • woodsey says:

        Indeed, I don’t see how anyone could argue with that logic.

      • dsch says:

        Sophistry.

      • killias2 says:

        Arguably, you can download completed pages and read them anytime you like. In that respect, RPS is more like Steam than Diablo. There is an unplugged option.. but you better plan ahead to use it.

        • Stevostin says:

          But you wouldn’t have the videos.

          Always on DRM has some pro and cons. That being said I was soooo pissed in D2 when I realised I couldn’t play my solo character online. So I guess it will fix that simple, common, unspoken yet huge issue.

          • jon_hill987 says:

            you can download the vids as well.

          • woodsey says:

            Surely a better fix would be, I dunno, telling people that they wouldn’t be able to when they started an offline single-player game?

            I’m picturing some sort of box with a message from the developers written inside it. No idea what you’d call one of those though.

      • Hematite says:

        Obviously this isn’t a serious argument BUT I’M GOING TO MAKE IT ONE ANYWAY

        I think RPS gets a pass on this because it’s free. Free excuses a lot. I don’t mind if a game (or website) is online-only if it’s free, because if for some reason I can’t access it I’m no worse off than I would be if it didn’t exist in the first place.

        Also, there’s the implication of duplicity on Blizzard’s part – they’re making a traditionally single player or lan franchise (for a large number of players anyway, how many of the shipped copies of D2 ever connected ot battle.net?) online only to increase exposure to the real money auction house they take a rake from. Tut tut.

        • wu wei says:

          “Free” makes things a lot easier to tolerate. I spent the past three days happily lost in the Path of Exile public weekend; while it’s also always-on, it doesn’t require me to pay $65 for the privilege.

          Mostly, though, it was the bullshit arguments that killed my interest in D3. Having separate characters for SP & MP would apparently have been too confusing for Blizzard’s poor, addled audience…somehow in a way that the exact same requirement for playing across regions isn’t.

          D3 is always on for the same reason many mobile games will insist on existent net access before they’ll load: to maximise the chances that someone, somewhere will make a purchase.

    • Conner_36 says:

      Good on you! I broke down and bought this cause after playing the beta with my brother (we’re on opposite sides of America) seamlessly, I can’t not play it….

    • Zanchito says:

      You’re not alone!

    • JToTheDog says:

      I shall stand by your side brother!

      Since a lot of my friends will disappear after tomorrow…

      • andytt66 says:

        You can borrow my brolly. It’s the one that rather improbably says “I’m not that interested in Diablo3, but if I was then I still wouldn’t play it coz of always-online DRM. Also, still boycotting ME3 and AssCreed”

    • Shooop says:

      My lack of interest in click-spam games have helped me in this I will say.

      I will instead pass the time rubbing the hypocrisy of others trashing Ubisoft for the same DRM in their faces.

    • BluElement says:

      I don’t know if I really understand this… “I won’t get to play this awesome game with my friends because I refuse to buy a game that requires me to be online in order to play with my friends!” So, were you planning on casting some sort of black magic in order to connect your game to your friend’s games?

      • woodsey says:

        I have no interest in it anyway, so they’ll be playing it and I’ll be decrying the use of always-online DRM for the single-player portion.

        Obviously I don’t take issue with the multi-player being always-online because… y’know.

      • Malk_Content says:

        Once upon a time me and my friends used to be able to entertain ourselves with a LAN party. Will do so again once Torchlight II comes out.

      • Shooop says:

        Sometimes people want to just play a bit of single player.

        Shocking I know!

  4. Premium User Badge

    Bluerps says:

    Monk or Wizard, I haven’t decided yet.

    Though I have no idea when I get to play anyway. The day has gone by without a mail from Amazon that they have shipped my game (yes, I follow the ancient tradition of buying a game in a box – I like boxes).

    • Mr Labbes says:

      I can’t decide either, it’s a tough choice for sure.

    • dreadguacamole says:

      Hey, don’t disrespect boxed copies; it’s almost 20 quid cheaper on Amazon than it is on battlenet.
      I got the email confirmation this morning… hoping to receive it tomorrow afternoon.

      • Premium User Badge

        Bluerps says:

        Hey, I like the boxes – I am buying one, after all. However, doing so has begun to feel a bit old-fashioned, for me at least. Nowadays, only a small fraction of the games I buy come to my home in a box, and even then I often don’t bother with the disc and only enter the Steam key.

    • caddyB says:

      I’ll go for both! Wiz for solo play and monk for tuesday nights with the guildmates.

      • BluElement says:

        That’s exactly what I’m doing. Wizard for solo play and Monk when playing with friends.

    • therighttoarmbears says:

      Man, I wonder what sort of demographic profile we fit that we are all considering the same of characters. Why do I always go for a magic or fist-fighting character? What does that say about me?

      • Premium User Badge

        Bluerps says:

        Clearly that you don’t have enough fist fighting and fireballs in your life.

  5. kastanok says:

    I’ll probably be off playing Baldur’s Gate again, something with dialogue choices.

    • aliksy says:

      It’s too bad they ripped out the extensive dialog system that was present in diablo1, diablo2, and the rest of the genre.

      Where’s that “this cupcake is stupid. it’s not big like a real cake” comic…

    • dreadguacamole says:

      But… but… the quality in the writing more than makes up for it!

      I’m paraphrasing, but an NPC you take with you on the beta says something like “But how can these abominations walk in the light? Light is figuratively and literally the enemy of darkness!”

      Rock on, Blizzard!

      • Fincher says:

        My eyes started bleeding as I finished reading that.

        There’s no way that’s really in the game, surely?

        • bhagan says:

          I’ll liked beta, but that line made me wince more than JONDAAAAAAAAAAAR!

          • GHudston says:

            Bad dialogue bars our path… but the will of a templar is stronger!

        • Memphis-Ahn says:

          It gets worse, a couple of cutscenes have been leaked and they’re just awful. The dialogue sounds like it was taken from a bad fanfic and the music from Disney.
          Not to mention all the other TWEESTS that I won’t spoil.

        • killias2 says:

          When did Blizzard lose their way? I genuinely enjoy the story and presentation from Starcraft, as barebones as it is. They squeezed every little drop of narrative they could out of their highly constrained options. Diablo just oozes with atmosphere, even moreso than Diablo 2.

          Also, the Diablo 1 manual is just ace. Seriously. Everyone who hasn’t read it in 15 years should stop what they’re doing and go read it. The writing isn’t “good” in the classic sense, but it’s fucking ballsy. The entire manual has this feeling of “fuck pop media, screw game ratings, this is a proper game about fighting Satan.” I mean, the background for the Overlords is, itself, about a page long.. and totally messed up.

          An excerpt: “The Lord of Hatred took the proud archangel and his followers captive. He bound Inarius with tremendous chains and slowly tore the wings from the back of the angel. Great barbed hooks were then used to stretch out the once glowing skin and his features were distorted by vile powers…. To this day, Inarius is said to be trapped in Hell within a chamber of mirrors, his eyelids torn from his face as he is forced to gaze upon his misshapen form for all eternity. His misguided followers now serve as Hell’s taskmasters, taking the anguish of their lost glory out upon the bodies of others.” That’s about one-third of the whole description. For a monster, not a boss or a major character. For a monster.

          By comparison, in Diablo 2, I’m sure the equivalent would be: “Red demon who lives in the desert. Serves Mephisto. Hates lightning.”

          In Diablo 3, I’m sure it’d be something like: “Strong but not ranged. Weak to lightning.”

          • GHudston says:

            Actually, most of the enemies in the beta had a lore entry when you bump into them for the first time. I’ll bet that trend continues through the game.

            How well the lore entires are written, I don’t know, but at least there’s something!

          • Brun says:

            They’re written relatively well – I listened to some of them, they’re written very much from the “storybook” perspective of either Deckard Cain or some other scholar. It’s definitely not as simple as “Strong in melee. Hates lightning.”

          • dreadguacamole says:

            They moved from D&D-influenced writing to blockbuster-influenced writing. They were never particularly good at it (or narrative), but they obviously think they are.
            Besides those wonderful cutscenes, you could strip most of the storytelling from their games and not miss much. Oh well, it’s relatively easy to ignore, and when it’s as bad as that line I quoted, it’s hilarious.

      • Premium User Badge

        Oozo says:

        “Light is figuratively and literally the enemy of darkness.”
        That sounds literally like something Chris Traeger would say. Now I imagine a Chris Traeger barbarian-character. That might finally be a reason to buy Diablo 3, come to think of it.

        • Premium User Badge

          ffordesoon says:

          PARKS FANS REPRESENT

          Also, I now want nothing more than Chris Traeger the vegan barbarian.

    • Premium User Badge

      AlwaysRight says:

      Im going to read a book, something with a better story.
      Im going to watch a play, something with better acting.
      Im going to listen to an album, something with better music.
      Im going to x, something with y…
      Im going to kill myself.

  6. Fincher says:

    That character creation screen looks IDENTICAL to the WoW creation screen.

    • Premium User Badge

      Seniath says:

      And this is relevant how?

      • Fincher says:

        You know, the one in the video in the article. Chill your beans.

      • Squirrelfanatic says:

        It’s an observation, it doesn’t have to be ‘relevant’.

      • derbefrier says:

        I think he was trying to imply that diablo 3 is just like WoW. Redicoulous I know but there seems to be people that won’t let it go

        • Fincher says:

          Haha, hold on, there’ll be plenty of time to get defensive post-release when there’s ACTUAL criticism. I was merely pointing something out, I wasn’t implying anything.

          • derbefrier says:

            If you say so….

          • Squirrelfanatic says:

            He obviously does.

          • Premium User Badge

            Hanban says:

            No worries. I’ll point it out for you.

            The character selection screen looks like the terribly dull one from WoW. As opposed to the wonderful one we had in DII. I know we’d have to fit a lot of people in there, but still. It’s pretty dull.

    • Mr Labbes says:

      It’s true, very similar. I was reminded of it as well and I don’t even play WoW.

    • Moraven says:

      They are updating the WoW Character screen to be more like D3. Which D3 is based off WoW but has more. Its in the WoW beta.

  7. downgrade says:

    Wizard or Demonhunter.
    Probably Wizard.
    Wizard. Wizziwizzwizz.

    Damn. 6 hours to go.

  8. Premium User Badge

    Seniath says:

    Past experience (3 WoW expansions and SC2) suggests that the servers will actually go live around 12am Paris time, so 11pm-ish here (possibly a bit before).

    • DiamondDog says:

      And subsequently crumble into dust about a picosecond afterwards.

      • Brun says:

        The last couple of WoW expansion launches have been remarkably smooth. Blizzard has definitely gotten better at doing launches since the days of Vanilla WoW. I wouldn’t be that surprised to be able to play almost as soon as the servers go up.

    • Necroscope says:

      I tried to sneak in but Blizz security caught me claiming their servers are offline for maintenance. I’ll be attempting to login around 11am as that’s my understanding the servers go live..

    • Mr Labbes says:

      Website says 00:01am CEST. Meaning in 5 hours.

      Edit: Oh wait, did we mean the same thing? The am/pm system always confuses me.

      • Necroscope says:

        Sorry, I meant 11pm UK time. Where is my mind?

        • Mr Labbes says:

          Seeing British people get confused with am/pm reassures me a little bit.

  9. rocketman71 says:

    I’ll be playing a NotGonnaBuy. Level 100.

    • alundra says:

      Ditto, I’ll be getting that one plus all it’s DLCs, best game ever, you retain your ethics and principles and don’t contribute to the decay of gaming.

  10. Snakejuice says:

    And my damn pre-order didn’t appear in the mailbox today, even though it was sent May 10th. :(

  11. Fiwer says:

    Europeans are getting the game earlier than Americans. Shouldn’t RPS be having a big freak out about this, like you always do when something releases earlier in America?

    • Premium User Badge

      Crimsoneer says:

      By like…6 hours?

      WOE! MY LIFE IS FORFEIT! WHAT PURPOSE WILL I SERVER IN THIS DIABLOLESS WORLD!

      RPS complains when release dates are DIFFERENT. This is a global release, that happens to follow timezones so that Gamestop in New York doesn’t have to stay open all night. It’s stupid, but it’s not at all the same thing.

      • Phantoon says:

        Why do people frame reference of time for America as East Coast? Both Silicon Valley and Bellvue are on the West Coast, which means the rest of America is completely irrelevant.

        • bowl of snakes says:

          I think it’s generally got its roots in live TV and Business (and probably fed Gov’t as well), and now online a lot of us in the US seem default to the Eastern timezone when talking about things with a mixed crowd, just to simplify things. It’s always been second nature to me and I’ve lived in 2 non-EST timezones.

        • Premium User Badge

          lasikbear says:

          And in this case I am pretty sure the game is unlocked at 12am Pacific, so 3am Eastern.

        • MrWolf says:

          As has already been pointed out, this has a great deal to do with national broadcasts, many (most?) of which originate from the east coast. Also, the location of the nation’s capital.

        • Jad says:

          Also half of the population of the United States lives in the eastern time zone.

  12. Steven Hutton says:

    I cannot decide on a class at all. My shit is completely ruined today. It’s all I can think about.

    • JackShandy says:

      -39 points for not making the “Runed” pun.

      • Premium User Badge

        ffordesoon says:

        Shitting out a rune sounds painful.

        • Nevard says:

          There’s probably a rune that makes it fire faster and reduces damage, but increases the mana cost and turns it blue

    • Necroscope says:

      I’m starting with the Wizard and will probably continue with the Wizard until my eyes are bleeding….7am the next morning.

  13. Freud says:

    I’m too old to be giddy, but I’ll lie if I told you I’m not suppressing the urge to bounce around and randomly say the word “diablo”.

    • Joshua Northey says:

      Everyone does realize that the game will still be available for sale a few months from now, and with patches and improved gameplay?

      • Freud says:

        By then I’ll be sitting on my porch in Monaco, smoking a cigar and sipping cognac. All bought with money I got from selling Diablo 3 loot.

      • Nevard says:

        But it will also be available tomorrow

    • Necroscope says:

      Ha! I’m probably too old to fist pump the air at how happy I am but I just have to satisfy the urge!

  14. Demiath says:

    Eurogamer’s retrospective for Diablo 1 was subtitled “Sympathy for the Devil”, but I wonder if there’s enough of that left (beyond the usual pre-release hype) to make D3 another distinctly conservative success story for BlizzCorp. The “let’s bring back that thing that we did years ago and do a really polished remake” approach just barely worked for Starcraft 2, but that was on the strength of an online-oriented (crazy) fan base with very specific (crazy) interests and a lot of (crazy) dedication. Its co-op features, Auction House silliness and future PvP elements notwithstanding, Diablo 3 doesn’t have the whole eSports (Social) Darwinism to lean on at all. It’s truly going to be interesting to see how the game is received…

    • Psychopomp says:

      D3 isn’t exactly hyperconservative, considering it’s the first major hack’n’slash since Diablo 2 that isn’t just trying to emulate Diablo 2.

      • FunkyBadger3 says:

        Errr… oh yeah, they added an auction house.

        • Froibo says:

          …and a completely revamped skill system and character attributes. Couldn’t we be making the same claim for Torchlight and that game got nothing but praise (rightly so).

          Also it BARELY worked for SC2 huh? Selling 3 million copies in the first month is just a moderate success now?

    • Fiwer says:

      But Starcraft 2 was very similar to Starcraft 1, whereas Diablo 3 has less in common with Diablo 2 than literally any other game in the genre from the last 12 years.

    • Premium User Badge

      Arathain says:

      Yeah, I don’t think D3 is that conservative at all. It’s still clicking on monsters and loot, but these games are largely defined by the way they interpret the mechanics around the basic interface, and D3 is being quite bold in a number of ways.

    • frosty2oo2 says:

      this game doesnt need esports to lean on, its grounded on the blood spattered obsidian obilisk that is diablo2

      my breakfast didnt involve any pvp, it was still quite satisfying

    • Shooop says:

      It’s already the #1 pre-order for every website that offers it. Next question.

  15. iucounu says:

    If I buy this, will I have to click through the boring beta section again, or can I pick up my beta character? Assuming I’ll have to do it all over again, right?

  16. derbefrier says:

    Still can’t decide if I want to roll with a monk or witchdoctor first. And being angry I won’t get to play until after work tomorrow.

    • Sic says:

      Definitively Witch Doctor for me.

      Massively underrated class, I think.

  17. Premium User Badge

    Carra says:

    Yey, they’ve dispatched my €32.50 pre-order from 2009.

    Probably gonna be a barbarian, lately I’ve been preferring melee classes. Then again, the witch doctor seems like fun… Mmm, I think I’ll just spend half an hour with all classes before deciding.

  18. ahmedaak88 says:

    witchdoctor of course . the closest thing to a necromancer in the game

  19. Gnoupi says:

    Going to be an embermage. Or a berserker.

  20. Premium User Badge

    Arathain says:

    I’ll try everything and see what sticks. I predict Demon Hunter right now.

  21. wodin says:

    Whats the betting there will be a crack out by the end of the week that means you can play offline…or is this the holy grail online DRM that can’t be cracked

    • wuwul says:

      There is no downloadable server, and hence it cannot be cracked, of course.

      Eventually (probably a year at least) a decent emulator might be available.

  22. Premium User Badge

    Revisor says:

    This slot machine simulator doesn’t deserve any hype whatsoever.

    Discuss.

    • Joshua Northey says:

      Well in some sense it is a slot machine simulator, but an extremely good one. In particular you have a lot more meaningful decision you make than on a slot machine, and there is a lot more narrative.

      In some ways life is a slot machine simulator, discuss. :)

      • Brun says:

        I think the analogy is apt at a high level – you’re saying that anything based on random chance could be boiled down to a slot machine simulator. That said, slot machines aren’t truly random – they’re programmed to pay out a jackpot after approximately X number of plays. Although actually, that’s probably closer to what Blizzard’s loot system will do, rather than be truly random.

        I like it. Good analogy.

        • Premium User Badge

          jimbobjunior says:

          Interestingly, slot machines are programmed with stricter statistical parameters than just average payout; the variance of the payout has to be strictly controlled too. This is how people can make money off them, they know the distribution the machine must payout at, and if they observe the machine long enough they can tell when the machine will be forced to payout to keep it within its statistical modelling.

          Edit: re-read your post. I think this is already the point you were making.

          • Snakejuice says:

            Are you sure slot machines work this way? Is it impossible to draw 9000 times without getting a win that has a 1/1000 chance of happening? If so I would be really intrested in where you got this information, is it just the usual hearsay?

          • Premium User Badge

            jimbobjunior says:

            In the UK, yes. I thought all machines were the same, but when I looked for a reference I realised there are two classes. One purely random and one that uses a compensated probability model as I describe above. I believe most machines in the UK adhere to the compensated model. http://www.gamblingcommission.gov.uk/gf-faqs/gaming_machines/how_much_should_a_gaming_machi.aspx See note 1 for details.

    • Premium User Badge

      ffordesoon says:

      No, I think it will reserve quite a lot of hype. It will reserve so much hype that nobody will be able to reserve a parking space in Hype, Oklahoma for at least a week.

    • frosty2oo2 says:

      you can’t reserve hype

      you might deserve it tho

      & if you like the look of something & its been massively hyped, i’d reserve a copy, to be sure

    • Freud says:

      When life gives you lemons, make bitter internet comments.

    • Shooop says:

      Neither did Battlefield 3, Medal of Honor, Call of Duty 6 through 20, etc.

      Hype isn’t earned, it’s created.

    • wu wei says:

      This.

      The auction house combined with having the loot-drop randomiser server-side makes me question the whole ethics of what Blizzard are doing.

      They profit directly from auction house sales. They also control the drop rate.

      Do you honestly believe they won’t be constantly modifying the latter to benefit from the former?

  23. Meat Circus says:

    I think I’m going to play as either a ferret-wrangler or the postal ombudsman classes.

    • iucounu says:

      Ferrets were nerfed in the recent update. I may roll Lounge Lizard for my first playthrough, maybe switch up into Cruciverbalist.

  24. pkt-zer0 says:

    The installer has pretty sweet music. Always liked the Tristram theme.

  25. trjp says:

    Must as I’d love to join the hype machine at 11pm UK Time, I’m not spending £45 for the priviledge – and going to shops at midnight is a worrisome activity so I’ll just pick-up a copy tomorrow like normal folks do 8)

  26. hench says:

    >But What *Is* A Diablo III, Anyway?

    A skinner box

    • Phantoon says:

      Yes. As opposed to the feel of the original Diablo, where you could end up getting no loot for pretty much all of the game, or receiving massive random windfalls of dosh.

    • MD says:

      Indeed, but so are MANY other games. I’m happy that people are calling out Diablo III on this, as long as this awareness carries over to everything else it applies to.

  27. killmachine says:

    i buy diablo from the grabbeltisch. meanwhile i play torchlight 2. don’t get me wrong though, both games are great. i think 50-60€ is just a bit too much. i don’t support this cash cow raping. i will eventually buy it when the price drops.

    • eks says:

      Surely if a cash cow existed, you would milk it, not rape it. A cash sheep, now that’s a different story….

      -A Kiwi

  28. Lobotomist says:

    Barbarian … i guess mandatory first class.

    But I am starting to warm towards Demon hunter and Monk

  29. DestructibleEnvironments says:

    Diablo 3? Looks like a Hellgate: London sequel. Obviously no biggie.

  30. fish99 says:

    I usually play an archer in these games, but found the DH surprisingly dull in the beta. The melee classes seemed the most fun, especially the monk. Decisions, decisions……

    I wonder if anyone will get caught out by the ‘magic damage based on your melee weapon’ thing with the wizard. It’s a little non-intuitive.

  31. Gassalasca says:

    I feel as if the game’s missing a class as it is. I want to play something paladiny, but I can’t. So it’s either Barbarian or Demon Hunter for me.

    • Brun says:

      I thought this too (feels like the game is missing a class), but it has the same number of classes that Diablo 2 had at launch (before Lord of Destruction).

    • Premium User Badge

      lasikbear says:

      Isn’t the monk just a paladin thats been flirting with western Buddhism for too long?

    • Premium User Badge

      Carra says:

      *Invents the expansion pack.* Voila!

  32. Paul says:

    Words cannot express how much I loathe Diablo 3’s art style and how much I like Path of Exile’s in comparison.
    Even the god damn font looks repulsive (the modern one).

    • Monkeh says:

      I’m kind of sorry to say I agree. The art-style just doesn’t fit the mood of the game, at all.

      This makes it bare-able for me though: http://www.darkd3.com

      Also, anyone else who thought it came across rather childish when you heard that Wizard say “too easy” at 2:41?

    • wu wei says:

      PoE’s look reminds me a lot of Demons Souls, which is a very good thing indeed :)

  33. Calabi says:

    Can you play this with a 360 controller?

  34. frenz0rz says:

    Any other Witch Doctors in the house?

    No? Just me?

    • frosty2oo2 says:

      then go do
      that voodoo
      that you do
      soo well

      Heddey Lamarr (Blazing Saddles)

    • Jimbo says:

      Give us the magic words!

    • Premium User Badge

      Lamb Chop says:

      The Witch Doctor has every one of the best abilities in the game. A giant toad that eats things? A totem pole of zombies that tips over onto your enemies? Zombies bears? Even fetishes, the most ridiculous enemy from D2, are now your minions.

      It’s really going to be a struggle to stop playing it for laughs and actually min/max once i get past nightmare.

  35. pipman3000 says:

    a miserable little pile of secrets

  36. Shooop says:

    Didn’t even finish Diablo 2 when I had it.

    Rapid-fire mouse clicking got old way too fast. Throw in the same DRM all you guys whine about whenever UbiSoft uses it and they’ve made this decision too easy.

  37. therighttoarmbears says:

    Sorry for a technicality question. Woke up this morning, decided that yes, dammit, that electrical sensation I’m feeling all over is excitement for this game, and it’s time to admit it and I’m going to purchase D3 and I’m going to do it now. So, I did. Bought it off battle.net, downloading and pre-installing, feeling pretty good about it. But there was some screen I saw there that said something about a CD key, and looking over all the info I have, there is no CD key. Also, my computer crashed (as it is wont to do – time for an OS reinstall when I upgrade hardware soon), and now I can’t seem to find the page requesting a CD key any more. Anybody know what the protocol is on this? Googling this invariably returns millions of sites offering to sell me shady CD keys.

    • Freud says:

      When you buy from battle.net, you don’t get a cd key. It automagically ties the game to your battle.net account, as if you had typed in a cd key and bound the game to your account.

      When you log in to your battle.net account it should say “Diablo III. Standard Edition” under Your Game Accounts.

      • therighttoarmbears says:

        Ah. Thanks. It appears you are correct! Thanks for your help.

  38. Busty says:

    Blizzard = Activision = No.

  39. Belsameth says:

    Barbarian at first, tho I’ll play them all.
    Also eying the Witch Doctor but lets start wtih something my brain can actually comprehend…

    *Toast smish!*

  40. dmastri says:

    this game looks boring

  41. MythArcana says:

    Spriggan for me!

    Oh, wait…well, back to Stone Soup then.

  42. Greggh says:

    And my new computer hasn’t arrived yet… :(

  43. FunkyBadger3 says:

    This is probably massively luddite of me, but is there a way to not share gold between your characters?

    • Belsameth says:

      You can throw it away before switching…

      Also, yes it is!

      • FunkyBadger3 says:

        Boo, down with this sort of thing. Why can’t the accounts be seperate, like in the old days…

  44. Suits says:

    None of the classes

  45. Premium User Badge

    piratmonkey says:

    Melee-wizard all the way ;D

  46. jussipe says:

    But what is the brain?

  47. Premium User Badge

    Drayk says:

    Gonna start as a wizard. But not until the 16th… Thanks Amazon…

  48. f1x says:

    Hate is back.

  49. dahools says:

    Anyone know where the cheapest DD of this game is for sale at? cant justify 45quid on battle.net when its about 33 boxed. However I would like to play it this evening and not go out and have to buy a box tomorrow morning.

    not interested in any singapore (photo of the box) codes either. Genuine sites pls