The Impossible Bicycle: GTA 5 Screenshotified

By Alec Meer on August 20th, 2012 at 3:00 pm.

haha, made you look at a man's bottom

For every Rockstar game since Vice City, the promotional screenshots have been rendered on a PC that only God herself could own, post-processed by a version of Photoshop from the 24th century and employed camera angles that you could only play the game from for 2.7 seconds before driving into a wall. It’s oddly reassuring to see that rich tradition continues with the latest round of screenshots from the little-shown Grand Theft Auto 5. Click for embiggenation of all of these.

Behold! A snazzy-looking bicycle as ridden by a man wearing the most heavily anti-aliased lycra trousers you’ve ever seen!

Behold! The arse-end of a sports car, albeit with rather less anti-aliasing!

Behold! A military plane carrying lots and lots of bombs that will prove mysteriously incapable of damaging brickwork!

There there’s these two others from last month, which I’m not totally sure we posted:


What have we learned? The next iteration of vehicle-centric action series Grand Theft Auto will have vehicles in it. Also swimming pools.

I am sure GTA 5 will be jolly good and its definitions will be very high. Great. But please put Red Dead Redemption out on PC. Please. Don’t you understand what the community will do with it, how beloved and long-living it will be? DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND.

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138 Comments »

  1. Pathetic Phallacy says:

    Will this game be a horribly optimized piece of shit for the PC as well?! I can’t wait!

    • Patches the Hyena says:

      I’d be happy if it ran like Max Payne 3, which I’ve heard runs very well on PC.

      • woodsey says:

        It’s an extremely good PC version, although I don’t know how much of that is to do with it being a third-person shooter. Not to say that you can’t fuck up a TPS port, but I’d imagine there’s a lot less to take into account.

        • xXBaconXx says:

          I think the reason GTA IV was such a shitty PC port was that the RAGE engine was so fresh. Judgning by how good the PC version of Max Payne 3 is, odds are that GTA V will be at least decent on PC.

          • DrGonzo says:

            GTA 4 runs smooth as silk for me now. Actually end up with a lot of tearing if I don’t crank it up to max.

          • linknin1655 says:

            There is nothing I would want more then to go through GTA V as a female protagonist and be called a slut, whore, and bitch for 20 hours and then perhaps be treated to a potential rape scene.

            http://www.mtbs3d.com/

          • roryok says:

            good lord they’re getting clever aren’t they? I think the singularity is coming.

          • LionsPhil says:

            They repost other people’s comments. The 600 series were easier to spot…had rubber skin.

          • DiiGiiTAL says:

            LionsPhil – Fuck I lolled.

    • BreadBitten says:

      I REALLY hope that Rockstar gets it right this time around, I had to uninstall GTAIV from my PC out of sheer frustration! At least we can take comfort with the fact that Max Payne 3 performed much better with PCs and that maybe the devs have optimized the engine to perform just as well for GTAV.

      • fish99 says:

        Maybe it’s time to try it again. A mid range PC (modest quad + 460) runs it really well these days – higher resolution, much higher detail and better framerates than the console version, plus the combat is much nicer on m/k than having to deal with the ‘next/previous target’ crap. And you can turn off the horrible distance blur thing on PC.

    • GetUpKidAK says:

      The engine has been massively improved since GTA IV. LA Noire ran perfectly fine on my last, quite dated machine and MP3 never dropped below 40fps on my new machine (which still barely handles GTA IV).

      MP3 looks absolutely stunning, too, so it’s clearly been heavily optimised.

      • AlphaCentauri says:

        It’s hard to believe and I barely believed it myself, but it appears LA Noire is not on the same engine

      • UncleLou says:

        But please put Red Dead Redemption out on PC. Please. Don’t you understand what the community will do with it, how beloved and long-living it will be? DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND.

        Yeah. It hurts just to think about it. The console exclusivity of RDR is the biggest loss for PC gaming*/modding of the last 10 years, in my opinion.

        *or, to be more precise, for gaming in general

        edit:

        Sorry, was not meant to be a reply to this post, but to the article.

        • Iskariot says:

          Perhaps it will happen for Red Dead Redemption 2.
          I am pretty sure RDR will never see a release on PC.

          I do not know about the loss for PC gaming in general, but I certainly consider it a loss for me personally.
          Because of RDR I contemplated buying a console for the first time in my gaming existence. I just can not do it. I hate the awkward sluggish controls.

        • Torgen says:

          I read somewhere that the code for RDR was such a Frankensteinian mess that there was no way to port it to PC- it would have to be recoded from scratch. Perhaps that played into the decision to axe the studio that made RDR?

          In any case, I’m in the same boat as many (most?) others in this thread. I’ve seriously considered buying an Xbox 360 solely to play RDR.

          • UncleLou says:

            It is a great game, but like the article says, it is the lost mod potential that makes me weep. :)

            But the studio wasn’t axed, was it? RDR was made by Rockstar San Diego.

        • Henke says:

          Modding? How much modding has been done with previous R* games on PC? Besides graphical enchancements I mean. Even if RDR got ported I don’t see it having a big modding community.

      • Llewyn says:

        Really? LA Noire runs like my ageing and arthritic collie on my PC. Having played GTAIV on the 360 instead, I haven’t ever encountered anything which performs as poorly as this.

        • Wreckdum says:

          They patched GTAIV post launch. It runs at over 100 FPS with everything maxed on my PC.

          LA Noire is a piece of shit console port however. Running at a capped 30 FPS. (Who does that?)

          Sometimes I regret putting so much money into my PC when only a handful of developers actually care that I run SLI and higher end parts.

          • Magnusm1 says:

            Well, the face-motion-recording was probably recorded at 30 FPS, so maybe it would look weird at 60 FPS.

          • Uronriop says:

            You’re either a lying sack of alaskan salmon, playing at a really low resolution or are playing it on a super-computer, my GeForce GTX 680, i7-2600K (Overclocked a fair share) and 16GB of RAM still don’t manage to get a solid 60 FPS out of GTA IV when I have all settings maxed and vsync on and to hell with playing these kinda games without proper vsync.

          • stupid_mcgee says:

            Magnusm’s right. The voice-acting for L.A. Noire was recorded at 30fps and it wouldn’t be able to properly sync if it was running at a higher frame-rate. So, there is actually a very good reason why the frame-rate is capped.

          • Aether says:

            Sorry this bit is incorrect, It run’s absolutely fine at 60 fps. I know because I have with a bit of hackier changed the fps cap to 60 and the face animations ran just fine.

        • virtualmatrix258 says:

          Apparently L.A. Noire is not the same engine as GTA IV. They labeled it as a “custom engine” but Rockstar confirmed it’s not RAGE/Euphoria. If GTA V runs anything like Max Payne 3 I’ll be extremely happy. I don’t think I ever dipped below 60fps with everything cranked up.

      • Magnusm1 says:

        L.A. Noire runs terribly and is unoptimised. I can play BF3 at medium with a respectable 30-40 FPS, but Noire barely reaches 20 at minimal settings.

      • fish99 says:

        Why do people still think LA Noire was by R*, they just published it, and it wasn’t the GTA4 engine.

        • grundus says:

          I think people think it’s Rockstar because it’s rare (in fact it may have never happened before, I’m not sure) for them to publish someone else’s game. It’s also quite similar to Rockstar’s usual open world style thing.

    • Smashbox says:

      RPS: I come for the articles, but I stay for the immediate shotgun-snark.

      • Pathetic Phallacy says:

        Anyone who dropped fifty bucks on this terrible port when it was released would understand.

        • UncleLou says:

          I’ve said it before: even unpatched, you had to have a very old PC to not have a better experience than on the consoles, where resolution, draw distance, traffic density and framerate were seriously piss-poor. Well, at least on the PS3.

          These days, on a modern quadcore (and after a few patches), you can put all sliders to the right, and even unmodded, it’s still an extremely impressive game, and the animations are almost scarily good with a high framerate.

          • SkittleDiddler says:

            You make it sound like everyone with a modern-ish rig gets the same experience as you. Trust me, that’s not the case.

          • Pathetic Phallacy says:

            Hi, you must be new to PC gaming.

            The thing you have to realize about PC gaming is that it requires a lot of time and effort to ensure that, as a developer, your game runs on a variety of computers. Upon the time of release of GTA 4 my system was a god damn beast of a machine and yet it still suffered from strange stuttering problems and texture glitches. Let’s not even get into the fact that Rockstar hadn’t even bothered to ensure any sort of cheating protection. Everyone remember endless rocket spam cars in multilpayer?

            GTA 4 was very VERY poorly optimized. Many consumers and reviewers will agree.

            Anyway, welcome to PC gaming. I hope you find some games you like.

          • Smashbox says:

            Mmmm that sweet, sweet snark.

          • Werthead says:

            GTA4 was optimised for quadcore machine. If you had a quadcore, you were okay. If you didn’t, you had Satan’s own time getting it to work fine. Remember that GTA4 is surprisingly old now (it came out in 2008) and at that time quadcores for gaming were much rarer than they are now, resulting in overwhelming frustration.

            I first played GTA4 last year on a brand new quadcore with the latest patches and drivers and it runs absolutely beautifully. However, this was not the case for a lot of gamers when it was first released. After very fine PC ports of VICE CITY and SAN ANDREAS (and a nearly-serviceable one of GTA3), Rockstar did indeed drop the ball on GTA4.

          • UncleLou says:

            @Pathetic Phallacy

            Oh dear. Apt username.

            Amsuingly, you accuse me of what you did in your first post to which I replied though. “Anyone”? Games run differently on different PCs, in case you’re new to this.

          • DrGonzo says:

            Hi, you must be new to the English language!

            He said, and was entirely correct. You had to have an utterly crap pc to not be able to run it better than consoles. In comparison the pc version was better, ran faster, looked better and even crashed less.

            Before you cry, ‘but I could barely maintain 30fps and there was loads of pop in!’. The console version had an unbearably bad framerate, pop in and crashed frequently.

            It wasn’t a poor port, it was a technically poor game in general.

            Still loved it, and now as has been said previously I’m mostly running the game at 100fps maxed. Another thing, it’s not a CPU intensive game, any modest quad core can handle it, it requires a pretty hefty GPU to play, preferably with 2 gigs of memory.

          • Kadayi says:

            You know what would be great is if all the people who say ‘that game runs like crap’ bothered checking to see whether that’s in fact still the case, or whether the games actually been patched and their are better drivers for it now.

            It get’s a bit tiresome when people keep referring to the past as if that information is still somehow an absolute.

    • Shralla says:

      I think a better question is will it come out on PC at all? Max Payne 3 was on PC because that’s where its roots are, and LA Noire came out on PC eventually because of disappointing sales on the consoles. GTA4 took some two years to come out and then sucked, and after that came Red Dead, which I think it’s safe to say is never going to receive a port at this point.

  2. Monchberter says:

    So San Andreas 2 it is then?

    • Papageno says:

      Wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world if this game had the “fun factor” and mission variety of GTA San Andreas.

      • Gorf says:

        Agreed.
        I just couldnt get into gta4, ive tried 3 or 4 times but can never play for more then 4 hours before boredom sets in and I quit.
        SA on the other hand was immenseley entertaining.

      • LionsPhil says:

        I think I’d rather smash GTA3 and GTA:VC headfirst into each-other, though; SA already had the rot setting in of simulating boring or better in reality parts of life like having to work out, or eat, or make token efforts at maintaining romantic relationships.

      • DrGonzo says:

        San Andreas was the worst GTA by a long way I thought. Vice City was the most fun, and GTA4 a close second. But San Andreas was mundane and boring. A list of features, not a game.

        • Narzhul says:

          Huh. San Andreas was the best GTA by far to me. The fact that GTAIV abandoned so much of what made SA fun caused me to enjoy it so much less than I should have.

          I’m hoping V fixes that.

        • Papageno says:

          Wow, I loved San Andreas. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I loved Vice City as well (as a man of a certain age I was in my 20s in the 80s, so the nostalgia factor was strong).

    • The Random One says:

      Hear hear!

      I’m kind of encouraged by the fact that a great deal of what’s been released of g’tav carries the connotation of “Remember San Andreas? We do!” Sure, it’s only the smallest of details (California! Commercial airplanes! A mountain! A bicycle!) but it shows they know where to focus. Or they’re just cynically targeting people who didn’t like the previous game and are unlikely to buy this one, even though it does the same things and won’t like it either. Marketing!

      • Henke says:

        Man I am overjoyed by the appearance of bicycles and jetplanes. Loved those in SA! :D

    • Werthead says:

      By all accounts it’s Los Santos plus a large chunk of surrounding countryside, with Los Santos by itself equalling Liberty City from GTA4 in size. The countryside includes some elements from SAN ANDREAS, such as the mountain you could paraglide off, but there’s been no sign so far of the other cities.

      Depending on how mental Rockstar are, it’s not impossible that the other two cities could be added in as DLCs of Unusual Size later on.

      • Zelius says:

        “By all accounts it’s Los Santos plus a large chunk of surrounding countryside, with Los Santos by itself equalling Liberty City from GTA4 in size.”

        Didn’t they also say that this would be the biggest GTA yet? I don’t know if they were actually referring to map size, or the amount of content in the game, but if it’s the former it’s gonna be pretty damn huge. I wouldn’t even mind that it only contains Los Santos.

      • Kadayi says:

        Personally I’d be happy with that if Los Santos is more filled out that Liberty City was in GTA IV. For all the grandeur of the game, it was surprisingly barren when it came to locations.

      • Papageno says:

        I absolutely loved the countryside areas in GTA: San Andreas, so I’m really hoping that those are included in V. Do we have a release date yet?

        • Tuskin38 says:

          I believe the official stance from Rockstar regarding the area is ‘Los Santos and the surrounding country die’

          So expect country side.

    • Dances to Podcasts says:

      I’m hoping the return to a familiar location means that they’re not out of ideas but rather trying to soften the impact of some new, unfamiliar, innovative gameplay ideas. One can hope, right?

      • Zelius says:

        If the return to a familiar location is a sign of “running out of ideas”, they’ve been running out since GTA2. Every GTA (with the exception of GTA: London, of course) takes place in one of three locations: Liberty City, Vice City, or San Andreas. Or all three, in case of the first game.

      • DrGonzo says:

        GTA 4 was rather innovative, and full of new things, especially for the franchise. New and innovation isn’t liked round there ‘ere parts. If it’s remotely clever, good or new we must hate it – GTA4. If it’s awful, unfunny and completely unoriginal then it’s great – Saints Row 3.

        • Jesus H. Christ says:

          pretty much agree with drGonzo. If they make gta5 more like sr3, I guess I wont be playing it. Part of what made GTA4 special was the fact that it wasnt wacky, wasnt aimed at the 13 year old Family Guy watcher mentality, and required some practise to master.

          But hey they will want to sell it to 10 million people which means that it will be more like SR3 than GTA4.

    • Phasma Felis says:

      …Huh. See, I saw palm trees and sunny beaches and immediately thought “So, a return to Vice City, eh?”

      I guess San Andreas had those too, though…

  3. Harlander says:

    Do we need a “staring arse” tag?

  4. Nim says:

    Hoping for a female protagonist for once is a futile endeavor, I suppose?

    • Pathetic Phallacy says:

      There is nothing I would want more then to go through GTA V as a female protagonist and be called a slut, whore, and bitch for 20 hours and then perhaps be treated to a potential rape scene.

      • The Random One says:

        MACHOORITEE

        Slightly more seriously, though, there will never be a female GTA protagonist, because the style of their narratives is very much about a male perspective. It’s like wanting a Tarantino movie that’s not incredibly violent, or a Joyce novel that can be read.

        • Dances to Podcasts says:

          You mentioned Tarantino. Doesn’t he show that female leads can work well in these kinds of scenarios?

    • Tuskin38 says:

      Well, the person flying the plane confirms that he is the Protagonist, who flies a jet in a suit other then the player?

    • Henke says:

      I think the first trailer for the game pretty much confirmed that it’ll be a male protagonist, but I don’t see why it’d be unlikely for R* to have a woman in the lead role. The GTA’s have no shortage of unconventional protagonists: Slavic dude, Jewish biker, black bodyguard working for a gay dude. In GTA:SA you played a black guy and you could even make him really fat if you wanted to. All of them quite far from the spikey haired buff white dude you play in most games.

    • Nim says:

      It’s a shame really. The first GTA featured female portraits you could use for your character even if the effect in game was negligible. I believe Rockstar with their track-record of protagonists could make a decent female lead for once if they were given the chance. I think the writers would love the challenge but the final decision rests with management who will forbid it.

    • Rupert484 says:

      I don’t understand why Rockstar will never have a female protagonist. Saints Row proved you could have both if you wanted, so why not GTA?

  5. Ginga121 says:

    First thought – What the hell is he doing with a road bike on the sand?

    • JellyD says:

      Well it is GTA, so it has more of those “What’s that tank doing upside down in my swimming pool” kinda things.

    • Carr0t says:

      Tyres look too thick for a racer. Maybe it’s a touring bike?

    • MonkeyMonster says:

      I’m going with hipster fixie tbh and then that fits perfectly with trying to look on the sand… The rear cassette area (due to being very hazy) doesn’t look correct for it to have gears.

      That and lack of rear brakes or perhaps they are disks… even more hipster or a cx perhaps?

      SO MUCH SPECULATION!

      • Chap O says:

        Definitely a fixie/single-speed.

        • identiti_crisis says:

          It’s definitely a road frame; it’s definitely got a cassette; it’s definitely got no rear brakes and those tyres are definitely “hybrids” of some sort. So I guess, like most things in GTA, it’s a severe bastardisation / mish-mash of different influences.

          Anyway, going by the fun I’ve had trying to do mototrials on the off-road bikes since they were introduced in GTA VC, I look forward to trying stuff like this! :P

  6. LennyLeonardo says:

    You didn’t make me look.

  7. Didden says:

    Fighter jet with a pilot in a snazzy suit and no helmet. It’s going to be realistic then.

    • Carr0t says:

      Because realism is what everyone looks for in a GTA game :P ‘Sides, you *could* fly a jet without the suit/helmet if you didn’t go too high or fast, or care about receiving incoming transmissions etc…

    • lordfrikk says:

      If anything, less realism will be better for GTA.

  8. Mr. Mister says:

    Yeah, top-secret anti-aliasing technology is great, but… is it greater than Panau?

    • andromedius says:

      Yeah, it’s called playing on a PC.
      Just joking here…
      When it comes to GTA V, I can only hope every gaming-plateform will be equally treated by RockStar.

  9. magnus says:

    Thsi time I hope the helicopters are going to be a lot easier to control this time round. The controls took a lot of the fun out for me in the previous games.

    • Surlywombat says:

      I always found the helicopters really easy to control in GTA, compared to say Battlefield (much of the time upside down) or Arma (mow the grass for a while then hit a tree).

  10. The_Great_Skratsby says:

    Grand Theft Auto: Rise of the Top Gun-Bicycle Thief

    Honestly, if it goes all po-faced like GTA IV I suspect my suspension of disbelief will be severely rattled. Crime drama and Carmageddon locking horns all over again.

    • LennyLeonardo says:

      I will never understand why some people describe GTA IV as “po-faced” etc. It was one of the funniest games I’ve ever played. I mean, Brucie!

      • Surlywombat says:

        It’s been going down hill since they took “GOURANGA!” out.

    • roryok says:

      since we’re name checking Top Gun can I just say RIP Tony Scott. What a legend. Not always the deepest films, but plenty entertaining.

      • MasterDex says:

        Hear, hear.

      • Gorf says:

        Holy shit Tony Scott died :( Man thats sad his films where great fun.

      • LennyLeonardo says:

        Blimey, I had missed that news. Very sad. Tony directed one of my favorite action films of all time (The Last Boy Scout), and he produced some excellent films besides.

        Good show, Tony, rest in peace.

  11. Askeladd says:

    I hope this version comes without annoying relatives.

    • BobbyDylan says:

      Only if you preorder from Gamestop. The amazon version has the OHK sniiper rifel thouhg….

    • Magnusm1 says:

      I can’t find the article, but there was a great write-up that explained Roman’s role in the game, and how he actually improved the game.

      • Bork Titflopsen says:

        “Cousin! Do you want to g- Are those sirens in the background? ANYWAY, want to go do this arbitrary and ultimately useless thing you’ve done 15 times already? No? What do you mean ‘more important things to do’? A firefight? I don’t underst- YOU KNOW WHAT? Fuck you Nico, fuck you! You’re the worst!”

        Juggling the happiness of three bimbo’s and five friends through the same mechanics each and every time does not fun gameplay make.

        As a character in and of itself Roman’s fine, though.

  12. Totally heterosexual says:

    Now that is an arse to talk about.

  13. Jon Tetrino says:

    As long as it runs better than GTAIV I will give this a serious look in.

    GTAIV is the only game I bought in the entire six year run of my current PC that I couldn’t run above 20fps on low. I bought it on release, so my 2 year old (at the time) box should have reached at least 30.

    It’s a shame really. I can stomach the FPS long enough to enjoy the world, but any missions are unplayable. Brilliant game really – as long as you remember they were trying something different this generation.

    • Smashbox says:

      If you try it again now, I bet it’ll work propor-like.

      • SkittleDiddler says:

        I wouldn’t bet on it. I bought IV long after all the final fixes and patches were implemented, and despite the fact that I’ve gone through three different system configs it’s still one of the most finicky PC games I’ve ever played. It’s just not a very well-designed game.

      • jroger says:

        I have a fairly decent rig by today’s standards. GTA IV still runs like molasses. (And so does LA Noire, which is totally based on the same engine, even if Rockstar claims different.)

  14. skinlo says:

    I know lots of people don’t like it, but I really enjoyed GTA 4. The environment and atmosphere was amazing, the city did feel pretty alive.

  15. golem09 says:

    Those screens look NICE. Everytime I see pictures of GTA I want to play it.
    But then I remember that the game forces me to play an asshole that steals and kills for money.
    Bring it on, GTA V, make me an undercover cop, and I might buy.

    • Cold Steel says:

      I’m not impressed by the looks, the textures could be straight from 2002, also blur everywhere.
      Suppose that’s the most the ancient console hardware can stomach.

      But looks come only 3rd to fun and actual playability.

  16. Bishop149 says:

    I’m not sure I’ll ever quite forgive the GTA series for the PC control bug that prevented completion of the final plot mission in GTA IV.

    • Hotseflots says:

      Weird objection, but whatever. Try Sleeping Dogs.

      • skinlo says:

        I finished it?? Not sure what you are referring to.

        • Milky1985 says:

          I know of the bug, mate of mine had it, apparently some aspets of the game are linked to FPS, specifcally how often you have to hit buttons during the button mash QTE (like the one at the end)

          if you have a high fps there is no way to hit the button quick enough to finish that mission, so you fail and have to go back tot he start of the mission (ironically mean ing that the people who are complaining of fps issues will have a better chance here)

          Of course theres also the fact that the ramp you have to drive over with the bike on the last machine is positioned in an aweful place that you cna easily miss, then you have to start the whole farking mission again if you miss the jump, resulting in what i like to call the “game can go screw itself” reaction.

  17. StAUG says:

    Well my PC ran MP3 maxed out and never skipped a beat so I’m not worried. Thank christ I bought GTA4 on PS3 though. When’s the PS4 coming out anyway?

  18. SkittleDiddler says:

    They pulled this same pre-rendered “true screenshots” bullshit back with GTA IV. I aint falling for it with this one.

  19. Hydrogene says:

    The white guy on the far right sitting by the pool looks very carboard-ish… Is it a photoshopping effect, or proof that some of the characters in GTA V will be paper-thick?

  20. nasKo says:

    Rockstar apparently gets the new version of ENBSeries before everyone else.

  21. Wedge says:

    Man this looks so lifeless. Still no idea whey they aren’t doing a 70′s GTA in Vegas or something.

  22. Lekker Pain says:

    “For every Rockstar game since Vice City, the promotional screenshots have been rendered on a PC that only God herself could own, post-processed by a version of Photoshop from the 24th century and employed camera angles that you could only play the game from for 2.7 seconds before driving into a wall.”

    Except these are 720p console screenshots.

    • Milky1985 says:

      Pics or it didn’t happen (i say this because some of the PS3 videos at E3 were running on a PS3, well actually muitple working in paraell to get the FPS up)

      Or it may be a console screenshot on a verison fo the engine that runs at 2 FPS :P

      Unless they specifically say console and the version then assume PC, since they can wack up the res , run it at awesome fps and get a ncie screeny from it.

  23. Meldreth says:

    I just hope that GTA V will have more colors than the previous one.

  24. The Random One says:

    I don’t think there will ever be an RPS newspost I’ll respond to only with the words DAT ASS, but if there was this would be it.

  25. Greggh says:

    Can I suggest a “Bicycle” tag?? After all the fun in a “Heroes and Generals” post from a while back, I firmly believe that bicycles are a stalwart quintessence of our tiniest community.

  26. DickSocrates says:

    The only thing that can make this interesting to me is if the city is ridiculously massive and diverse. The one thing I like about GTA:SA was how you felt like there was this insane world to explore, not just a city. GTAIV was a massive step backwards, it was basically GTAIII again. Yeah it was detailed and looked nice, but it was just New York again, and to be honest if you look at any footage of the real New York (or perhaps you’ve been there), it didn’t ‘feel’ as alive.

    V has to blow my mind this time around, simply moving it all to another city again won’t cut it. Are Rockstar even capable of radically updating the formula, increasing the scope and detail of what you can actually do? So far, they haven’t made a single GTA that wasn’t just GTAIII again but with the expected minor improvements. Would also be nice if this was the first GTA that wasn’t broken in every single area. GTAIV’s driving was broken, the melee combat was broken, the gunplay was broken, the cop system was very broken (insanely easy to shake them on long straight roads, basically IMPOSSIBLE to ever get 6 stars). And the scripting for each mission felt broken.

  27. Calabi says:

    But will the cars handle like dog turds. Thats what I hated about GTAIV the cars were not enjoyable to drive at all.

    • uncannychuckles says:

      Compared to what?
      I often hear this complaint about GTAIV, but the car handling is richer and more nuanced, and more realistic than any other GTA-a-like that I’ve played (Mafia, Saints Row, LA Noire).
      I have the feeling people who say this either wanted the simple ‘pivot-stick’ handling of the earlier games and didn’t give themselves enough time to get good, or they are are HC racing sim fans who aren’t used to playing a different genre.
      Personally, using a keyboard/mouse, I could dominate races/chases and really enjoyed the challenge and the way the cars all felt different from each other.

      • Nick says:

        compared to every other gta game including the top down ones..

    • UncleLou says:

      Car handling in GTA IV was pretty much the biggest improvement for me. I always found it boring in the GTA IIIs, just a means to an end (to get somewhere). In IV, it became more challenging, more fun to drive, spectacular with the physics engine, and finally a game mechanic that could stand on its own two feet.

      Just goes to show that they will never be able to please everyone of us, no matter what they do. :)

  28. Navagon says:

    Oh bugger. Not more flying missions. That’s almost more off-putting than the bloody DRM.

    • Tuskin38 says:

      What DRM did MP3 use Retail? It wasn’t Steam, only the Digital Edition was Steam, the retail wasn’t tied to it.
      GTAV will most likely use what MP3 used.

    • Tuskin38 says:

      Oh I found it, they were using ‘GameShield’ for MP3 and LA Noire

  29. Kleppy says:

    I’m playing GTA4 on my 360 right now, and it’s hilarious how awful the framerate is. It’s pretty much as bad as when GTA4 came out on PC, only even uglier.

    So, there is absolutely no chance those aren’t PC screens. The current console generation can’t possibly pump out these graphics.

  30. Tusque D'Ivoire says:

    The Cheetah. god, how I loved that car. and how it’s not even real…

  31. JamTheFab says:

    Red Dead Redemption will never be on PC because Rockstar hates PC. They’re to chicken shit of “Pirates”. But since PC gaming is evolving and a decent rig is cheaper now these days. They’re newer games will be on PC because they realize that some of their fan base migrated to PC gaming. So it’s lose sales or make the port.

    You can go down to Wal-Mart and get a PC minus the monitor for about 400 bucks that will out render both the PS3 and Xbox. With the right cable, a bluetooth dongle, a wireless xbox controller. You can hook the PC up to TV and use it like a actual console with better graphics than current gen consoles.

  32. uncannychuckles says:

    I’m pretty sure RDR is the best game I’ve never played.
    It’s the only game I’ve ever really wanted play that I haven’t been able to, being the PC elitist that I am.
    There are times I’ve even considered buying an exbox just to play it, before remembering who I am.

    I have to think it’s just pure stupidity on the part of Rockstar that they haven’t brought the game to PC, or that some fuckhead bean-counter thinks that it won’t sell because the 1st one wasn’t on PC. Either that or Microsoft/Sony secretly payed a couple million to keep it off of the PC.

    Even if it only sold 50,000 copies (a pretty conservative estimate, it could top 1 million), at $50 for a ‘complete collection’, that’s still a cool $2.5 million. There is no way porting it would cost that much. So what’s the deal?

    Someone needs to make some calls– get this stuff straightened out.

    • derbefrier says:

      ehh RDR was okay. its pretty much GTA in a western setting with the same problem of getting boring and repetitive after a few hours in but then again it seems most open world games are like that so maybe its just me.

      • UncleLou says:

        I loved it to bits, more than any GTA. Mission design was a bit samey, but it was the sidequests stuff like the treasure hunt (which was just brilliant, without any and-holding) and hunting in the wilderness that I really loved. And the setting is so dramatically different that I really never thought of GTA when playing it

    • Jesus H. Christ says:

      Maybe. Or they could port it, get the same or more hate like the Dark Souls Developers, have shit sales and lose money, reputation, and good will.

  33. SgtSilock says:

    Looks to me like they are bringing San Andreas back : )

  34. Nick says:

    Hope they remember to make it fun this time.

    /subjective