Crysis 3 Spotlights The Gunnest Gun Of Them All

By Nathan Grayson on January 17th, 2013 at 2:00 pm.

I do so miss the days when the majority of videogame weapons were completely outrageous. Sure, today’s crop of Battlehomes and Medalfronts adore their reality-balking setpieces, but look up at their skies, and you’ll see that even the sun has donned its most serious warface. Comparatively extinct, then, is the cartoony carnage of Doom’s BFG – or, more recently, Painkiller’s, er, painkiller. Heck, even Far Cry 3 kept its open-world madness grounded with a fairly tame arsenal. It’s nice, then, to at least see its equally tear-prone cousin Crysis 3 go completely bonkers. The Typhoon apparently fires “500 bullets per second.” Its alt-fire, meanwhile, looks to be some kind of flame catapult. Watch as it wreaks havoc on an icky, sticky squid swamp after the break.

That was just silly. It reminds me of the time I created a shotgun machine-gun (yes) of near-apocalyptic caliber in Garry’s Mod, which is a favorable comparison so long as you don’t mind wielding a tiny god and treating fear as an entirely foreign concept.

As per always, Crytek’s crafted quite an attractive-looking environment, too. The swamp looks suitably sludge-ridden and hostile – spider-webbed by weeping roots that almost seem primed to reach out and choke you – and all the optional verticality’s a nice touch. That said, any semblance of spooky atmosphere Scooby-Doo-sprinted out of the room as soon as the Typhoon did its thing.

But still, if these Seven Wonders videos have proven anything, it’s that Crytek’s claims of environmental variety haven’t just been hot air. And while I enjoyed Crysis 2 decently enough, I did feel the big city’s concrete confines breathing down my neck a bit too often. So this is good news. No, it still really doesn’t feel like Crysis 1 by any stretch, but oh well. Different doesn’t mean bad. It just means different.

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100 Comments »

  1. f1x says:

    Its hard to watch a game trailer when there is a big EA logo observing you

    • GetUpKidAK says:

      Is it? Are you sure?

    • Chalky says:

      What the hell is going on with that watermark anyway? Is someone at EA worried I’m going to re-upload this video and say “hey everyone look at this awesome game I made all by myself”?

      • Ultra Superior says:

        No, you’re supposed to click it and increase their miserable site rank.

    • Ultra Superior says:

      it’s the purest form of observation, and now – they’ve got a lot to see…

    • ResonanceCascade says:

      When you stare into the EA logo, the EA logo stares back.

    • darkChozo says:

      The hide annotations button is your friend. Though he’s a bit worried, you haven’t called him in a bit.

    • f1x says:

      For real, the A of EA winked provocatively
      nasty logo.. I’m already married

    • aDemandingPersona says:

      I actually didn’t notice it with all the bullets and everything.

  2. Totally heterosexual says:

    That sure is gun.

  3. Bhazor says:

    It’s like how much more gun could this be? And the answer is like none. None more gun.

    Edit: It is becoming clear that our education system has failed us in that people no longer know about Spinal Tap.

    • RedViv says:

      Well, maybe 0.13 gun, but that’s about it.

      • Ginga121 says:

        Who cares how much more gun it could be? The simple fact is… I’ll take 2 :D

    • The Lord of Leisure says:

      Surely for Crysis, it’s “Maximum gun”

    • Shooop says:

      But it doesn’t go up to 11 for that extra “Oomph”.

    • F3ck says:

      This pretentious ponderous collection of stupefying trailers is enough to prompt the question, ‘What day did the Lord create Crysis 3, and couldn’t he have rested on that day too?

    • Bart Stewart says:

      To put Spinal Tap back in the public’s face, what’s needed is Spinal Tap: The Game.

      Suggested features:

      * Do the Stonehenge Dance!
      * Perform for a packed house of literally dozens of people!
      * Go up to 11!
      * Choke to death on someone else’s vomit!
      * Die! (optional “Be The Drummer” DLC required)

  4. sinister agent says:

    Seriously. There should be a blanket ban for five years on any new game that includes an AK47 or MP5. So boring.

    • Rao Dao Zao says:

      Amen to that. I knew the end was nigh when they removed the Ripper from UT.

    • SanguineAngel says:

      you get my vote for prime minister

    • elmo.dudd says:

      Fun fact, Black Ops 2 contains neither of those guns in the multiplayer (there might be some in the Past levels of the single player). Nonetheless, Typhoon!

    • maninahat says:

      I agree. They’re on my list of least interesting arsenals in games, along with Desert Eagles, Glocks, SPASs, and M16s.

    • pakoito says:

      Remenber when we wanted WW2 FPSs to stop 5 years ago?

    • Joshua says:

      Half Life 2 has the MP7, the USP and the SPAS-12 – does that one count?

      • sinister agent says:

        As it happens, I found Half Life 2 very boring, and the weapons highly dissatisfying to use.

        However, they did include some more interesting weapons, including of course the gravity gun, so they regain some points there. But some boring is still worse than no boring.

        Unless you’re a miner, I guess.

    • sharkh20 says:

      I was a big fan of some of the weapons in the Turok series.

  5. vapsyvox says:

    So it’s a portable Metalstorm. How about that.

    • kwyjibo says:

      In the alternate Crysis universe, Metal Storm never went bankrupt.

  6. Putrid says:

    So they made a more advanced hand-held version of metal storm? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8hlj4EbdsE#t=0m20s

    • Bhazor says:

      My first thought too.

      1 million bullets a second, essential for home defense.

      • Jhoosier says:

        Actually, 1 million rounds per minute. I mean, let’s not get crazy here.

        • kwyjibo says:

          Kind of a meaningless number when you just stack barrels on top of another. Rate of fire for a double barrelled shotgun would be similar if you just measured the first two rounds.

        • SuicideKing says:

          LOLFACE

      • Monkey says:

        THEY’LL TAKE MY METALSTORM FROM MY COLD DEAD HANDS!

  7. Baresark says:

    I have to say, they have been pushing this bow thing a log, which seems utterly stupid when they were going have a genuinely fun and awesome gun in the game the whole time. Don’t get me wrong, I love shooting a bow in real life. It’s really freakin’ awesome, but I don’t want to play a video game that lets me shoot something I can shoot in real life. I want weapon exploration. After watching some of these videos I have to seriously reconsider my position on this game.

    • reggiep says:

      I’m pretty psyched for the bow. It’s stealthy, and will be able to work with a lot of different ammo types — like explosive arrows. The bow will probably be available the entire game while the Typhoon will probably only make an appearance towards the end. Plus, the rate at which it consumes ammo will likely make it a limited use weapon.

      Either way, I’m glad they are having some actually interesting weapons this time around.

    • Lord Custard Smingleigh says:

      It’s clear that what today’s discerning gamer wants is a bow that fires 500 arrows per second.

  8. Daedalus29 says:

    This gun exist, kind of:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AEu9LLQpOF8

    Ah, and in the video, the gun doesnt have a alt fire, he just ripped the head of the alien cockroach, and use it as a flamethrower.

  9. Gnoupi says:

    “I am Heavy Weapons Guy. And this… is my weapon. She weighs 150 kilograms and fires $200 custom-tooled cartridges at 10,000 rounds per minute.

    It cost $400,000 to fire this weapon…for 12 seconds.”

    • x3m157 says:

      Some people think they can outsmart me. Maybe… *sniff* maybe.

      I have yet to see one who can outsmart bullet.

  10. Mr. Mister says:

    I believe there was a mod for Fallout 3 called “Minigun that Shoots Chainsaws that Explode”.

  11. Utgaardsloke says:

    Two things Nathan:
    1. It seems like some form of a Metal Storm-like design, weapons that does exists today (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metal_Storm)
    2. The “alt fire” is another, alien weapon the protagonist picks up.

  12. Lambchops says:

    My favourite gunniest gun is probably the Redeemer from UT. Although the minigun in that game was awesome as well. And the flak cannon. And the ripper. And the bio gun. And the shock rifle. And the impact hammer (ok it’s not a gun).

    Basically UT’s weapons were great. Apart from the enforcers of course.

    • elmo.dudd says:

      Buzzwha? The Enforcers were great, such a good feel, and fun with headshots. I was so sad when UT2k3 came out and they replaced it with the machine gun.

      • LionsPhil says:

        Yeah, and if you got a pair of them akimbo and could reliably land headshots, they were more lethal than the dang minigun.

        • Lord Custard Smingleigh says:

          Oh the many hours I played on Morpheus laughing as people spray minigun fire at me at long range, wasting dozens of bullets, while I place 5-6 shots carefully into their right eyeball with the Enforcer.

      • Lambchops says:

        Yeah they were better than the machine gun that’s for sure.

    • KDR_11k says:

      I never liked the Redeemer much. Sure, it’s a big boom but you need a bunch of enemies clustered up to get more than one kill with the thing. The Quake 3 BFG felt much more super since you could fight several battles with the ammo.

      • elmo.dudd says:

        Quake2 BFG in CTF. Fire that into the enemy base and watch them scatter – and then watch as the BFG ball fires tracking lasers at them, signaling where defenders were hiding as you ride in behind it. It isn’t so much a gun as it is an armed convoy leading you in. That then explodes killing anyone near it.

        Also, BFG Jump.

  13. buzzmong says:

    Hah, reminds me of the Imperial Repeater from the Dark Forces/Jedi Knight games.

  14. SuperNashwanPower says:

    I wish it had the metalstorm BRAAP sound. That’s cool.

    Also weapons like this always have next to no ammo. You’ll be out after a few squids

  15. fallingmagpie says:

    This is exactly the kind of high capacity magazine assault weapon that Congress needs to ban. Write to your representative today!

  16. Sc0r says:

    Even with uber-strength armor, I wish it’d have a little recoil.
    You can be as strong as you want, without a sturdy stance, you’d topple like an idiot.

    • DK says:

      What that video showed wasn’t game footage by the way. The camera moves independantly of the weapons aim. It was completely fake footage made to look like game footage.

  17. woodsey says:

    And yet, I feel as if I’ve just watched a three minute video demoing a machine gun like any other.

    • Bhazor says:

      It pretty much does look your stand issue machine gun.

      Why can’t we have the Resistance arsenal be in every game? Every gun in that game has some tweak to it like bouncing razor blades, or bullets that become faster as they pass through walls and so on. This is just a machine gun that fires slightly faster to the point its basically a shot gun.

      • Squishpoke says:

        I was really impressed with Resistance’s gun design as well.

  18. RaptorEchelon says:

    It goes to eleven

  19. RC-1290'Dreadnought' says:

    I wonder if Crytek is planning to make a sequel to Crysis at any point.

    • mseifullah says:

      Well they said that they’re already thinking about part fou — Oooooh, I see what you did there.

    • ResonanceCascade says:

      They did, it was called WARFA — er, head.

  20. jryan says:

    That weapon isn’t really far fetched. It’s just designed off of the existing weapon “Metal Storm”:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFjGbOyd2ek

    The flame thrower, on the other hand, has a Moe Szyslak feal to it.

    http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lg9hllKgp11qc63sno1_400.jpg

  21. Chris D says:

    That does look quite impressive but unless it can also fly after enemies while shooting them before exploding while I also shoot them with a cloned version of itself then I’m just going to have to stick with my shotgun from Borderlands 2.

  22. marsilainen says:

    The always-efficient flamethrower. Mah favorite.

  23. Moni says:

    “The culmination of 2000 years of warfare.”

    Prophet is a creationist?

  24. FurryLippedSquid says:

    Anyone else want to post about Metal Storm?

    • jryan says:

      Metal Storm is important information that can’t wait for a proper thread readin’

  25. DickSocrates says:

    “This gun is so full of bullets, it will make you ejaculate and high-five your frat brah at the same time.”

    This trailer has had its tongue surgically removed and buried on a distant world. Not to mention, it’s hard to get excited about an in-game gun that sounds like spitting seeds out of your mouth and does it so quickly you can’t see or feel any of the supposed ‘awesome’. The Doom shotgun makes you feel powerful, this just makes enemies look weak.

    • elmo.dudd says:

      The Doom shotgun feels awesome until you meet a pinky when it can take up to 3 shots (if your aim isn’t spot on) to kill, and if it didn’t happen with that, it would feel weak when you meet your first Baron. Hopefully Crytek has this gun come in later, when you’ve gotten a sense for how strong the enemies are and thus can appreciate its output.

      The chaingun in Quake2 made the Gunners and Gladiators feel weak – but until you get it, they take some punishment.

  26. Monkeh says:

    Is it possible to die in this game?

    • Chris D says:

      No, but you can lose if you haven’t completed the mission when the crippling back pain finally overcomes you.

    • D3xter says:

      I believe you just get increasing amounts of bloody screen.

      • Lord Custard Smingleigh says:

        If you’re sufficiently manly, the only effect being shot has on your body is blood seeping from your eyeballs.

  27. Hunchback says:

    I approve of this kinda weapon in a shooter, as with the posts general theme. Gief back absurd guns that wreck havoc. Redneck Rampage, Serious Sam, Doom… GIEF BACK~!!!1

  28. x1501 says:

    Can I have one for hunting and home defense?

  29. Ergates_Antius says:

    It reminds me of the time I created a shotgun machine-gun

    A machinegun that fires shotguns? Win! Winnier if the shotguns fire pistols that fire sharks, with laser beams for eyes.

  30. Crazy Hippo says:

    but its firing airgun pellets!!

    also the machine gun shotgun was in syndicate remake in co-op http://torvenius.deviantart.com/art/Syndicate-Concept-MJOLNIR-H-O-G-Beltfed-A-ShotG-280480589

  31. Smoky_the_Bear says:

    There is no way from the sound of it that this gun is firing 500 rounds a second though, not saying it doesnt look cool but they needed to pick a smaller number, lol.

    • Droopy The Dog says:

      You might be able to explain away the sound being so low frequency by just saying all 10(?) barrels are firing simultaineously. But even for 3000rpm it doesn’t really sound droney enough.

  32. Pray For Death says:

    Yeah yea the game looks pretty and all, but I just can’t shake the feeling that this is Crysis 2.5, rather than 3.

  33. MadTinkerer says:

    Oh please. That is not “as gun” as the weapon I made in the Worms 2 Weapon Editor: The Gatling Homing Atomic Bomb Launcher.

    We had thought the Cluster Holy Hand Grenade was too much until we thought of the GHABL. We were wrong.

  34. rockman29 says:

    It looks like how they would describe flechettes from a science fiction novel.

    Which is to say pretty awesome. Althought usually the flechettes are sharp, though just as numerous!

    • SuperNashwanPower says:

      Weren’t the Flesh-ettes the girls who used to dance behind Kenny Everett?

      Oh no that was Hot Gossip.

  35. F3ck says:

    I’m actually a bit nauseous watching this…does EA really think we take our alien gibs this seriously?

    …like watching a recruitment film…these trailers are intended to mop up the potential marines left behind by CoD and BF3…I thought these were supposed to be fun Mr. Seriousvoice?

    I’m calling it now…I hate this game.

    The more they want me to care…the more I appreciate my Borderlands…

    edit: also, the nuclear chain-gun mod from FNV makes this look like a super-soaker…

    • SuperNashwanPower says:

      Seriously, this turned you off that much? To me it seems very different to the OORAH type games, way too hammy and over the top to be taking it self actually seriously. I dunno, I just love the crysis tech-porn style!

      I also have an irrational hope that it will scratch the open world shooter itch that Far Cry 3 didnt scratch. I know, irrational ….

    • Shooop says:

      A little early and harsh to say you hate the game already isn’t it?

      Other than that I do agree it is taking itself way too seriously. Especially when weapons like that need a much less “SO DARK AND GRITTY TM” so we can really enjoy them.

      I’m not liking what I’m seeing so far either but I’m not ready to slap a “Hated it!” label on it and call it day yet.

  36. Fallward says:

    EA Project Manager: “Hey, let’s create a really fun gun”
    EA Designers: “How about a machine gun with a high rate of fire?”
    EA Project Manager: “OMG that’s PERFECT, so UNIQUE”

    Meanwhile UT and Quake developers facepalm.

  37. Rawrian says:

    Bah! Once I’ve edited Doom 2′s double barrelled shotgun by tinkering with frame speeds and such in some program which name I forgot. Now THAT was a gun. This one’s just a glorified machinegun.