By Nathan Grayson on January 18th, 2013 at 5:00 pm.
Here at RPS, we like to have a little fun every once in a while, but it’s time for real talk: Warface is no laughing matter. It afflicts several billion people per day, and chronic Warface has stumped even the techno-magic of modern medicine for years. Recently, it took Alec from us. Now he just sits in a corner all day, banging his head against the wall and mumbling about how he “must forever live in the shadow of his own Sistine Chapel.” And well, you’ve seen what it does to RPS comment threads. Really, it’s a misnomer: Warface is actually a disease of the mind. An apparition of the soul. Friends don’t let friends face Warface face war war war face far wace wa rface w arfac e.
W… who am I? I’ve suddenly forgotten everything about myself. Oh, but I do have this note saying Warface is now in closed beta. Seems innocent enough.
So servers are now live, and you can take a shot at joining by signing up over at Warface’s official website. Be warned, however: it features a military man contemplatively staring at a dust-and-ash-coated skull in a distinctly Shakespearean fashion. Try not to get distracted by that, though. Otherwise, you’ll never be able to sign up, play, and find out what whiplash-inducing twists of dramatic circumstance brought him to that sobering point.
From the sound of things, the beta includes both standard manshoot-y PvP and a “frequently updated” co-op PvE universe. “Why do we war?” I hope its characters query of their unthinking skull sidekicks. “And indeed, why do we face?”
At any rate, Crytek’s giant leap into its much-vaunted free-to-play future begins here, so I imagine it’ll be pouring quite a lot of time and money into this one’s success. For its part, the closed beta is running until some nebulous day in “spring 2013,” at which point it’ll officially launch for everyone. And on that day– WAIT. I remember! I’m Nathan Grayson. I used to be someone. I used to be an actual human being – not a puppet for this insidious w… wuh… wuh… wuh.
Warface? Warface. Warface!
18/01/2013 at 17:03 jonfitt says:
Oh no, here it comes.
18/01/2013 at 17:06 Fontan says:
We have no option but to face this.
18/01/2013 at 17:14 JFS says:
I do not dare envisage the horror that is upon us.
18/01/2013 at 17:15 darkChozo says:
It’s a bit of a crysis but we don’t want to just be russian in all willy-nilly.
18/01/2013 at 17:29 tobecooper says:
I fully expect this to blow up in our faces soon.
18/01/2013 at 17:54 Makariel says:
Ich WAR über diese FACEtte nicht informiert.
19/01/2013 at 00:45 Zorn says:
Wonderful!
19/01/2013 at 01:05 Dances to Podcasts says:
Wunderwar.
18/01/2013 at 17:19 Lambchops says:
KELFACE
“Aww, here it goes!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_BqoQ7LoZ0
18/01/2013 at 19:45 Drake Sigar says:
Young man, are these apples reeeeeeeeed? Are they delicious? Where are they grown?
18/01/2013 at 17:21 diamondmx says:
[Snake] Warface has changed. [/Snake]
18/01/2013 at 17:49 Tams80 says:
Warface? Warface never changes.
19/01/2013 at 03:01 particlese says:
Oh, really? I beg to differ. *octocamo mask*
*faces war*
WARFACE
OH COME ON
ಠ_ಠ
18/01/2013 at 22:59 Geen says:
Warface? Warface?! WAAAAAARFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!
19/01/2013 at 02:47 ye0912 says:
After reading everything again, apparently the guy is happy with the witcher games but is sort of angry because of the international press asking him about the games constantly or something, he is definitely kind of weird
http://www.hobbyconsolas.com/reportajes/entrevista-al-productor-de-the-witcher-2-9081
18/01/2013 at 17:29 NailBombed says:
‘This is the way the world ends. Not with a WAR…… but with a FACE’.
18/01/2013 at 17:34 Skabooga says:
WarCry: Facesis
18/01/2013 at 17:41 Zunt says:
I was in the restaurant choosing the wine. Since I was alone I decided not to have a full bottle. After some minutes perusing the excellent, extensive and alphabetically labelled wine list I finally made my choice.
“I’ll have the 23rd on the list please, not a full bottle.”
The waiter shuddered and twitched. A low moan escaped his lips. Then he shrieked:
“You mean… the W CARAFE?”
Fin.
18/01/2013 at 19:32 Skabooga says:
This is gold.
18/01/2013 at 21:57 corinoco says:
This is war.
Face it.
18/01/2013 at 17:45 McDan says:
I think we should just enjoy it, take it at face value.
18/01/2013 at 21:12 mineshaft says:
Is the beta feature-complete? Or is it disfigured by gaping content holes?
23/01/2013 at 09:50 scatterbrainless says:
War is Face, carried out by other means… Face means.
18/01/2013 at 17:05 Deathmaster says:
Must. resist. urge.. to.. make… bad… joke….
….
JOKERESISTINGFACE
18/01/2013 at 17:10 Deathmaster says:
Oh come on, the platform you register on is even called GFace.
http://beta.gface.com/ BETAGFACE
18/01/2013 at 17:06 Mr. Mister says:
…is that freelancer wearing 3D googles?
18/01/2013 at 17:40 Pony Canyon says:
You say that as if you aren’t wearing 3D goggles yourself.
You are wearing your military-issue 3D goggles, aren’t you?
18/01/2013 at 17:54 Tams80 says:
It does indeed look like he has old style 3D glasses on is face.
Has a he got a warface on though? We shall never know as I doubt he takes them off, as he can’t face the war he’d have to face. He is thus at war with his face.
18/01/2013 at 23:02 SuicideKing says:
3DFACE
18/01/2013 at 17:08 Squishpoke says:
WARFACE.
18/01/2013 at 17:37 Lambchops says:
Swarf? Ace!
18/01/2013 at 17:59 Meat Circus says:
When the gib hits your eye like a big pizza a pie, that’s a warface.
18/01/2013 at 18:03 JFS says:
(that’s a waaarfaaace)
18/01/2013 at 20:20 FluidLogic says:
“When the floor starts to shine, slick with blood, just like wine. That’s a’ Warface.”
On another note, the dude who composed that song is named Harry Warren-face
Somebody stop me……please.
18/01/2013 at 22:00 corinoco says:
Guns wills sing, Banga-Banga-bing, and we’ll all put on camoooo…
18/01/2013 at 18:31 Hunchback says:
WARFACE? THIS IS SPARTAAAAA!!11one!eleven
18/01/2013 at 21:19 Ian says:
WARFACE
18/01/2013 at 17:10 Dominic White says:
From what I played of the Russian version a while back, the co-op is both brutally hard, and surprisingly fun. It’s basically Crysis minus the nanosuits, and a focus on chewing through tons of soldiers and the occasional boss in power-armor or a full sized mech.
18/01/2013 at 17:32 FakeAssName says:
I found it something like Quake wars with a more convoluted class system … but I barely made it through the training course and stoped there … there was just too much about the class functions I didn’t understand.
18/01/2013 at 18:58 Gorf says:
sounds good
18/01/2013 at 17:17 LXM says:
I only managed about 10 minutes before quitting. It seemed like an incredibly generic F2P shooter (and I enjoy a good shooter) with little/nothing to offer…even the graphics were sub-par.
Anyone with slightly more patience than me have any insight as to why this might be worth a second chance?
*edit – I was also extremely disappointed that the “Choose your Soldier” screen wasn’t called “Choose your Face”
18/01/2013 at 17:19 NailBombed says:
Think you meant to say…. AW, FARCE.
18/01/2013 at 17:27 Dominic White says:
Were you playing the same game? Because sub-par graphics? It’s fractionally less pretty than Crysis 2. There’s a good screenshot gallery here http://www.polygon.com/2012/10/19/3528132/warface-screenshots#!/3884541 – for some reason, they seem to have anti-aliasing and some of the heavier post-processing effects off, too.
18/01/2013 at 17:50 LXM says:
Fractionally less pretty than Crysis 2? Sorry but I experienced exactly what’s in those screenshots and I think it looks dated and clunky and not even close to the visuals of Crysis 2.
Considering all the talk of AAA production values I didn’t expect them to mean AAA circa 2006 (and yes I understand this is still in beta)
18/01/2013 at 17:23 devil_92 says:
I think partily why i am so intressted in this game is because i have not been able to actually play it :P
18/01/2013 at 17:23 FakeAssName says:
I signed up for the beta well before that Gface thing was a twinkle in cryteck’s eye, do I still have to sing up for Gface to get in the beta?
18/01/2013 at 17:27 Shooop says:
I played the Russian release.
The co-op is really well-done, but there’s only 2-3 maps for it! The PvP is hampered by the smallest maps I’ve ever seen and there’s very few of those too.
It’s free-to-play for good reason folks. Not a terrible way to kill an hour or so, but it doesn’t have any staying power.
18/01/2013 at 18:46 Kasab says:
I downloaded the Russian client many moons ago and had a lot of fun with it. I see all these announcements for a beta release and get horribly confused, because I realise that I’m not Russian and I’m just far too previous. Sometimes, though? I hear those voices at the back of my mind- maybe I’m actually a Soviet spy, and maybe the rest of the this world isn’t keeping pace. Maybe I have a killswitch or there’s a score of sleeper agents I must contact. Maybe the Soviet Union is a dead entity.
Oh, and maybe Warface is more than just an average shooter. Maybe not.
18/01/2013 at 23:31 Shooop says:
It mostly is with a few nice features, especially the well-made co-op mode. But its biggest problem is the lack of content – there’s only so many times you can play two maps in your favorite game mode before it gets tedious.
Unless they plan some serious post-release support it’s not long for this world.
18/01/2013 at 17:32 MOKKA says:
Now I wonder how a ‘CLOSEDBETAFACE’ would look like…
18/01/2013 at 17:39 cpt_freakout says:
LIKE A WAR OF FACES FULL OF BUGS
18/01/2013 at 20:17 gwathdring says:
Well and exuberantly stated, Soldier. That’s one hell of a Warface you’ve got there. Keep up the good work.
18/01/2013 at 17:36 x1501 says:
I don’t see any women on the screenshot.
MISOGYNYFACE?
18/01/2013 at 17:36 Tei says:
Is this soldier using 3D glasses?
18/01/2013 at 17:45 lijenstina says:
Someone makes a pun
someone else takes a binary gun
shoot the other in the binary face
bullets drop on the skull like a mace
Warface, warface
Fun with a virtual guns
not like the Hitman’s S&M Nuns
Here you do stuff
like killing others
with no story fluff
obeying orders
crossing borders
invading others
Warface, warface
why the sad face
they’ll vanish without trace
then you can wear a nighty and black lace
on a night out in the bar near the base
Have a lot of fun
while thinking about a different kind of gun
Next time you’ll dress like the Hitman’s Nun
18/01/2013 at 22:10 jikavak says:
WARFACE
18/01/2013 at 17:47 Fazer says:
I have a theory why F2P games seem to be so popular. In normal “pay to play” games, the only players counted are the ones who bought it while pirates are ignored. However, we know that they can consist of even 80-90% of the fanbase, so when F2P games include them in the calculations (because there’s little point in pirating them), suddenly they seem to have much larger audiences.
18/01/2013 at 17:51 x1501 says:
I’m not sure I’m convinced. Why would hardcore pirates waste their time on some crappy F2P game when they have a full library of high-quality AAA titles to choose from? It’s probably people on very limited budgets and casual gamers on antique machines who are chiefly interested in games like this.
18/01/2013 at 18:16 Kitsuninc says:
As a once-pirate (From when I was a kid with a computer and loads of time but ~$100 a year credit card budget) I can say that pirates still play F2P games. Usually for a multiplayer fix since you can’t really play pirated online games. Also because why not? There are a lot of F2Ps like League of Legends, Tribes: Ascend, and Hawken, that are easily on par with AAA releases.
18/01/2013 at 18:34 darkChozo says:
Most (all?) F2P games are multiplayer, so piracy doesn’t really factor into a lot of their P2P equivalents in a particularly meaningful way. Also, it’s pretty obvious that a F2P game is going to have a larger audience than if it was P2P; that’s basically why the format exists, it allows you to maintain a healthy playerbase by having a very low barrier to entry. The important thing from a business standpoint (ie. the standpoint that explains why companies are going F2P) is whether it makes money or not, which it clearly does (re: any of the major F2P games).
18/01/2013 at 17:56 ArtyFishal says:
Played a little yesterday. Co-op was surprisingly fun. the medic’s shotgun is very satisfying to use. it’s a beastly thing that makes you feel like a bad ass.
18/01/2013 at 22:05 corinoco says:
What, it makes you refuse to pull the cart? Spit out all your carrots? You’re a bad, bad ass.
18/01/2013 at 18:18 diamondmx says:
Anyone else think they should make this a deathmatch headbutt game?
18/01/2013 at 18:28 Gap Gen says:
Awesome writeup.
18/01/2013 at 18:28 Hunchback says:
I started snickering immediately after reading the tittle of this post, then couldn’t stop while reading the rest, then i knew what the comments would be like, then i read the first one and i couldn’t help it but laugh… Then it all went to my face :D
18/01/2013 at 18:30 TCM says:
Poor Alec must really have egg on his WARFACE.
18/01/2013 at 18:58 jryan says:
War…. war never faces.
18/01/2013 at 21:32 quietone says:
FACEBOOK
*shudders*
18/01/2013 at 22:03 corinoco says:
The Russian release?
Pfft. I’ve been playing the Kiribati version since last Tuesday.
It’s not so much war face as ‘oh fuck my island is sinking knee’
18/01/2013 at 22:06 corinoco says:
Warface?
ARROWKNEE!
19/01/2013 at 07:12 1Life0Continues says:
YAWNFACE
19/01/2013 at 21:54 Universal Quitter says:
“Warface is actually a disease of the mind. An apparition of the soul. Friends don’t let friends face Warface face war war war …”
I hope I wasn’t the only person that thought, “Are you my mummy?”