Triads Will Rise Again At The End Of July

By Nathan Grayson on July 2nd, 2013 at 9:00 am.

What is he aiming at?

Meanwhile, in The Future:

[A couple, walking down a glistening chrome sidewalk, marveling at the chrome butterflies and chrome sunset via their Google Chrome Reality Browser Interfaces]

Man A: “What a world we live in! So much opportunity and technology and beauty. Magical pocket rectangles that tell us everything we could possibly need to know, rapid transport across the globe, boundless entertainment, and jetpacks for everyone.”

Woman A: “Yeah! And we don’t even have to deal with pesky names anymore. Just extremely limited designations based on physical characteristics and letters. This is the best!”

[The couple suddenly hears a cry nearby and rushes to find its source: a man shuddering and pointing at the sky, practically soaked bone-deep with sweat]

Man B: “Uh… uh… up there! It’s… it’s…!”

Woman A: “Oh lord. Triads.”

Man A: “But we morphed into dogs and crotch-bit them to death back in the ’90s, and then society flourished. Look at my jetpack! LOOK. This can’t be happening!”

Woman A: “Well, based on the fact that they’re up there, just kind of floating and occasionally gyrating, I’m gonna say that they’ve risenAgain.”

Yes, Interceptor’s Rise of the Triad revival is coming out later this month – specifically, on July 31st. You’ll be able to grab it on Steam, Green Man Gaming, Apogee’s website, or GOG for $14.99. The latter two shops will offer the game entirely bereft of any sort of DRM.

There’s also an Apogee Throwback Knick Knack Paddy Wack Back To Back Snack Pack (I may have added some of those words) in it for you if you pre-order, but probably don’t do that because you have no idea if the game is actually going to be any good yet. Nothing against Rise of the Triad, but preorders ask you to fire blind and hope your wallet doesn’t take the bullet in vain. Then again, this one’s only $14.99. It’s your call.

At any rate, Rise of the Triad is about light speed shooting and occult imagery and fire-vomiting eyeball bats – a distinctly “retro” brand of wackiness still sneezing powder from its modern makeover. Most writers probably would’ve put that sentence at the beginning of their article, but I didn’t because subversion or rebellion or I’m a repressed author of terrible fiction or something. But yeah, July 31st. How are you feeling about ROTT?

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20 Comments »

Top comments

  1. Dowr says:

    This looks fucking stupid.

    And I want it.

  1. Kobest says:

    Can’t wait for some old-school FPS brought back to life. Seriously, with this and the Shadow Warrior reboot, I’m feeling quite spoiled these days!

    (Although, I might play this after I finish the first No One Lives Forever…that will be quite the change of pace.)

    Oh, and “Knick Knack Paddy Wack Back To Back Snack Pack” sounded like the introduction of the black soldier in Hot Shots: Part Deux! :)

  2. bstard says:

    ‘Rated PO. This article contains pre-order material. Alcoholic comforting is advised’.

  3. MarcP says:

    I thought the first ROTT was a poor game. Now I’m thinking this one might be good. Thanks to the sad state of the modern FPS more than anything else, as this looks similar to the original. Yay for lowered expectations.

  4. analydilatedcorporatestyle says:

    Ocular detritus apart, looks fun!

  5. Dowr says:

    This looks fucking stupid.

    And I want it.

  6. mrmalodor says:

    Am I the only one who’s a little worried that the game is so cheap? I know it’s not funded by major powers, but 13 euros? I guess there might not be a full-fledged single player mode.

    • Kobest says:

      No need to worry, my friend. There is a full-fledged single-player campaign (4 episodes with a total of 20 levels), along with standard multiplayer. From the developer:

      “The original ROTT had a lot of “Filler” levels, that werent quite up to the standard of the Shareware episode.
      In the reboot we decided to focus on good levels. The game has 20 singleplayer levels, spread over 4 episodes.
      For the regular player the Singleplayer Campaign will most likely last between 10-12 hours, while speedrunners might be able to finish it in around 6 hours or less. It’s a game with a lot of exploration, secrets, and puzzles as well. So the leght of the game is often determined by which type of gamer you are. “

      • analydilatedcorporatestyle says:

        Ah those happy days of running round walls pressing the space bar!

      • mrmalodor says:

        Will there be some sort of story, characters, cutscenes? Of course I’m not expecting BF3-style grand cinematic stuff, but is there at least…something? Or just levels with dumb AI?

        • Premium User Badge particlese says:

          I really hope they didn’t try to stuff it with story, and given what they’ve showed so far and the price of the game (grand cinematics often need custom animation, voice work, music, etc., increasing production costs), I’m guessing they haven’t. :D That said, the original did have some fun bits of story (with multiple endings!) told through a couple of subtitled drawings with sparse sound effects. I’d be totally fine if that was the extent of its storytelling.

  7. Premium User Badge DrScuttles says:

    But surely the key signifier of the future would be Google Desert Chrome Reality Browser?

  8. LordMidas says:

    Does this new version still have the moments where you wound an enemy, and they are on their knees begging for their life?

    I always used to put away any meaty weapon I was using and whipped out the pistol for a mercy headshot. Ahh, thems were the retro days.

    • Premium User Badge Jackablade says:

      “No Please, don’t shoot… Bleh”
      *appears to die*
      “Suprise! Gimme that!”
      *Jumps back up again and steals your heavy weapon then shoots you with it at point blank range*

  9. Noodlemonk says:

    Nathan, remember to use that tag when hands oning Arkham Origins.

    • The Random One says:

      I hadn’t noticed the tag, so I thought about what the two games had in common and imagined it was “everyone is a skeleton”.

  10. Kobest says:

    “Ugh, oomph…where is it?”

    Edit: Oops, meant as a reply to the spacebar-spamming secrets.

    I do hope they will have some funnier secrets instead of the “open this wall to find more health” kind.

    • Frisky Dingo says:

      I bet Ellen DeGeneres is hiding behind one of those walls. Use spacebar with caution.

  11. Junon says:

    So excited to see the return of both God and Dog mode.

  12. buzzmong says:

    Saw this at Rezzed, apart from what seemed to be a really silly low FOV set up on those computers, it did look quite good.

    • cdx00 says:

      I noticed this too — hopefully there’s a slider! I love sliders!