RPS Plays… The Scariest Games Of All Time

By Nathan Grayson on November 1st, 2013 at 12:00 am.

Halloween weekend is upon is, and that can only mean one thing: it is time for unrelenting spookiness. No matter where you go, you can’t escape it. Bats will shriek, pumpkins will leer, and the sky will basically be made of lightning. Also, everyone you know will try to kill you. By giving you too much candy, which will ultimately result in diabetes if you give in to peer pressure and partake of hedonistic holiday sugar consumption. So naturally, as a public service (of sorts), RPS must do its part. Thus, I have elected to play three of the scariest games of all time in rapid succession, testing the limits of my psyche and intestinal fortitude for your amusement. What lies ahead? Push on the implausibly creaky door and go below for a video of gaming’s darkest, dankest, murderer-iest basements.

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36 Comments »

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Top comments

  1. Grygus says:

    You need to stop horsing around.
  1. Drake Sigar says:

    AAAAAAGH, AAAAAAAAAAAH, ARRRRAAGGHGH!!1!

  2. Grygus says:

    You need to stop horsing around.

    • Marar Patrunjica says:

      Indeed, it would behoove them to do so.

      • SominiTheCommenter says:

        Clop’s this? Puns, on RPS’ Mane Page?

        • maxi0 says:

          I don’t mean to nag, but I must show you the filly of your ways. Perhaps you chaps need to watch the clip again.

          • BLACKOUT-MK2 says:

            What sort of i’neigh’n nonsense doth you speak?

          • stupid_mcgee says:

            “i’neigh’n”? Not to be an ass, but when you try to cobble a pun too much, it kind of rides out its welcome, nay?

            -edit- all joking and punning aside, I’m not trying to pick on you or be a jerk or anything, but this pun run was just too tempting of carrot to resist. ;P

          • Trillby says:

            Mounds of shit.

          • grrrz says:

            ok, we’be been beating the same dead horse for too long now.

    • zain3000 says:

      And buck the trend of Halloween silliness? Neighver!

    • Muzman says:

      Oh shoe.

  3. RagingLion says:

    Woah. RPS is branching out into Let’s Play.

  4. Gwilym says:

    scaring eyes tag

  5. AtomicTroop says:

    I kinda hoped they’d have played Harvester. Now that’s a “wacky” horror title.

  6. Premium User Badge

    golem09 says:

    Silent Horse series is still the best.

    • YogSo says:

      Maybe, but it wouldn’t even exist if it weren’t for the Alone in the Bark games.

      • Premium User Badge

        melnificent says:

        Is that the one that led to the creation of Amnesia: A machine for Care Bears

        • grrrz says:

          I’d enjoy a petting game with the creatures of amnesia. can we do that?

  7. DestructibleEnvironments says:

    Can anyone beat my record of playing this for 4.4 hours? I think I’m worthy of being thrown in the guinness records book.

    • Premium User Badge

      Gap Gen says:

      Guards! Throw him in the deepest, darkest Guinness Book of Records!

  8. PopeRatzo says:

    “Holy fuck! What the shit just happened?”

    And that is why we leave the blogging to the professionals.

  9. Swanny says:

    Was that a fucking unicorn on the title screen?

    Nooooooooooooooooooo……

  10. Stardreamer says:

    “That was not my voice…”

    Brilliant. Genius idea, chaps. MOAR PLS!

  11. FurryLippedSquid says:

    Diabolical pony sparkles.

  12. Guvornator says:

    What I gathered from this is, buried beneath the layers of snark, Nathan is actually too much of a wussy-legged, yellow bellied Capt’n Pissy Pants to play scary games, and has therefore decided to mask his fear by being sarcastic about kid’s games. Better that than spend a minute facing off with facehuggers in Aliens Versus Predator Classic (as we apparently have to call it now) and let the internet hear you scream like an 8 year old girl…

  13. Premium User Badge

    quietone says:

    WE’RE GONNA DIE!!! WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!

    Eventually.

  14. KafFiend says:

    So… does King like or dislike rats? Or people wearing hats?

    Inquiring minds want to know. Or maybe not, if they know what’s good for them.

  15. Premium User Badge

    Matchstick says:

    To maximize the terror potential read this first to fully understand the horror the first game is dealing with.
    http://www.tor.com/stories/2013/09/equoid

    • HybridHalo says:

      Hah! Yes! This is the first thing that came to mind as I watched the video! Stross’s Laundry series is brilliant.

  16. uh20 says:

    3:30
    the only other thing i have to say is that dog has jerky animation

  17. Crankwerk says:

    I have to agree, this is the scariest game ever – well Democracy 3 was high on my list too…

  18. soopytwist says:

    Yeah, thank you for wasting a portion of my existence. I hate you.

  19. cptgone says:

    and the winner is….
    Fate of the World
    http://www.fateoftheworld.net/