Your Whole Keyboard Controls One Sad Spider In Spidren

By Nathan Grayson on March 26th, 2014 at 12:00 pm.

Parenting!

Spidren is the spindly, web-spinning Train Jam spawn of Octodad programmer Devon Scott-Tunkin, and that kinda makes perfect sense when you think about it. It’s about an oft-misunderstood owner of too many legs and one lonely heart just trying to scrape by as its brood of children wreak havoc on its life. Difference is, while Octodad plucked out a gentle, family-friendly melody on heartstrings, Spidren does anything but. If you fail to protect your multi-segmented legs by flailing about using almost your entire keyboard, your bizarrely adorable younglings will STAB YOU TO DEATH WITH YOUR OWN FEET. Let this serve as a lesson, folks: it’s not easy being a spider, and it’s even harder when you’re a single spider mother whose children are unrepentant murderers.

The controls are simple. Haha just kidding they will be your nemesis. Your increasingly disheartened spidermom (watch that pooooor face) has eight legs, each with three individual segments. As a result, you must keep your swarm of skittering hatchlings at bay with 24 different keys, and a single press doesn’t even necessarily result in an action that’ll accomplish that.

The key (huh/ugh) is combining presses on various segments that result in the care and feeding stabbing and eating of your awful spiderkids. Holding femur and tibia segments of one leg and then tapping the same leg’s metatarsus portion (ex: hold W + A, then tap Z) will result in a stabbing motion, while holding tibia and metatarsus causes you to devour an impaled ne’er-do-well. If you were ever grounded or spanked for being naughty, just remember: it could’ve been much, much worse.

Early waves are manageable enough, but eventually your sea of offspring becomes too much, and they start tying up your oh-so-brittle appendages like Hoth snowspeeders bringing down an AT-AT. Spidren is a jam game, so there’s not much more to it than that, but it’s certainly, um… different while it lasts. Play it for free here.

Thanks, Indie Games.

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15 Comments »

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    Anthile says:

    Played it for fifteen seconds. This is the most terrifying thing in existence.

  2. cafeoh says:

    You better fucking have a n-key rollover keyboard for this. Also mech ’cause then articulating your spideys goes *clickclickclickclick*

  3. DrMcCoy says:

    WERT YUIO
    ASDF JKL;
    ZXCV NM,.

    I’m on an QWERTZ keyboard, you insensitive clod!

    • DatonKallandor says:

      The Indie obesssion with using the Z and X keys is really fucking dumb. Especially because a lot of indie devs think they don’t need key rebinding capability.
      “It’s just two buttons! X and Z!” Yeah you fucking idiot. Those buttons aren’t next to each other on every keyboard.

      • Malarious says:

        Okay. Look at it this way: these games are overwhelmingly English (or Japanese, who also use Qwerty), designed for people who use English keyboards. Every modern OS lets you emulate other types of keyboard through software (in Windows, you can assign multiple keyboards and switch between them with alt+shift). I don’t see any reason for them to waste time developing for people who will most likely never even play their game, especially when it can be so easily fixed on the user’s end if they care to do so.

      • Phasma Felis says:

        “Indie obsession”? Right hand on arrows, left hand on lower-left-corner has been a thing since at least the late ’80s. It used to be Ctrl/Alt/Space until Microsoft fucked it up by putting a “crash game” hotkey between Ctrl and Alt; now it’s Z/X/C.

        So, serious question, has no one in all this time written a simple hotkey script to swap between QWERTY and QWERTZ/AZERTY at the touch of a function key? Because I could do that in about 15 minutes. Seriously, say the word and I’ll post it somewhere. (Assuming I remember to come back and check, since RPS’ Godawful comment system doesn’t have reply alerts.)

  4. LionsPhil says:

    Argh. I could not murder even a single spiderling.

    A MS Natural keyboard is not the easiest thing in the world for this game.

  5. Zekiel says:

    Yeah, uh, I don’t think so. The spider in Limbo was the most unsettling thing I’ve ever played. The idea of a whole game based around this concept… shudder.

    I’m not even arachnaphobic for goodness sake!

  6. Nevard says:

    It’s nice to see “control all of your limbs” games returning to Triachnid

  7. jonfitt says:

    I played through three levels. On the third level all I did was let them eat all but 2 limbs and then used one limb to stab the spiderlings while holding the other aloft. I’m not sure if I even needed that second limb.
    Much easier with only one limb. Hold top and middle and stabby-stab-stab with the bottom row.

  8. Lemming says:

    All I managed to accomplish was a giant crying spider with missing legs. Horrifying.

  9. Psymon says:

    I can cheat.
    I’ve got the microsoft X4 keyboard.
    I can hold all 8 keys on the top row, and more, holding all legs off the ground, so none of the baby spiders can climb up and start eating.
    Then its just a case of stabbing and eating one at a time until the next round.
    Takes most of the fun out of it :C

  10. Max Planck says:

    Eeew.

  11. CookPassBabtridge says:

    You forgot to put that picture in the article. You know the one. Here, let me fix it for you
    http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2013/140/3/a/_cute__spider_by_amylovespenguins-d65x46t.jpg