Rock, Paper, Shotgun

I’ve been playing Knights of the Old Republic making all the most evil choices possible. Like you do. Written up in three parts, the final chapter of Simon Evil’s wrongdoings has now appeared on Eurogamer. You can read parts one and two by clicking on these cleverly placed links. Here’s an excerpt:

“It’s interesting how picking the evil choice that destroys a woman’s life, or kills an innocent, or sees families slaughter each other, has a very different emotional effect than aiding the enslavement of an innocent tribal race. All are obviously deeply evil, but I think I’m able to compartmentalise the more individual actions more easily, mentally filing them under “terrible thing I did in a game”. Even though polluting the Kolto would have devastating effects across the entire galaxy, I think it’s still pretend enough to laugh off. Oppression struck deeper. I was still delighting in making the evil choices, but here on Kashyyyk I was feeling those familiar pangs from the first third of the game again.”

Carries on here.

Talking of Knights of the Old Republic, part two of my adventures as Simon Evil, the galaxies most evil Jedi, is up on Eurogamer today. After the squirm-inducing antics of Part One, Simon Evil’s continuing douchebagging his way around the planets seemed to become slightly easier. Perhaps too easy…

“Get over it,” I told Mission, the 14-year-old Twi’lek who had joined my party. She was confiding in me about the horror of her home planet being utterly destroyed. The Sith had completely obliterated the population of Taris, countless millions had been slaughtered, and everything she had ever known or loved, beyond one Wookiee, was gone. Move on, whiny child.

It continues here.