Rock, Paper, Shotgun

As I fell, drunk, out of a carriage in Baker Street, I reflected upon my relationship with that great man Sherlock Holmes. He was a bit of a pain in the arse, cocky, and a junkie. I was a doctor, a learned man of great responsibility. We were strange bedfellows indeed, but we had never shared a bed. That rumour, spread by London villains to discredit Holmes, had destroyed my marriage. Holmes and I had only ever shared a kiss – we had become a little bit giddy in a bubble bath after a night at the opera.

I knocked on the door and was received by Holmes’ landlady, Betty Rawcook. “Dr Watson!” she exclaimed. “Where are your trousers?” I pushed past her, fell, and my face smashed against an oak sideboard. When I came to, I was in Holmes’ room, and the great man was standing over me with a grin on his face.
Read the rest of this entry »

Hello youse.

Yesterday I was doing an interview about a gaming strand I’m presenting for Glasgow Film Festival. The interviewer and I got to talking about board games, and why there seems to be a little bit of a “boom” happening right now. Why are so many people starting to play board games again? Why are so many games websites covering boardgames too? I suggested that it might be because computer and video games are becoming less and less physical. As downloadable games become the norm, we lose the ability to hold our treasured things in our hands. Gone are the big thick manuals and the books of lore, gone are the cloth maps and the otherworldly coins. Game collections seem increasingly like nothing more than temporary personal access to some strange ghostly lending library.

We like something we can hold. We like something we can lay out and look at. That’s my theory anyway.
Read the rest of this entry »

Hello youse.

Today I want to tell you about a new game called ESCAPE: The Curse Of The Temple. It’s a game that plays in 10 Minutes. It’s frantic. And I felt that the best way to explain it would be to try to somehow capture the character of the game in text form.

And that’s why this week’s column is one I will write in TEN MINUTES. I am going to start a timer, start writing, and when the timer stops I will take my hands off the keyboard. There’s a lot I want to say, so please forgive any typos or mistakes. I have nothing pre-planned. And I am in a rush.

You ready? Let’s go.
Read the rest of this entry »

Hello youse.

I know this might horrify you, but it’s almost Christmas. I’m getting ready for it right now. My tree is up in my living room, and my house is so garishly lit it looks like a modern console game. Santa Claus is coming, my friends, and we must get prepared.
Read the rest of this entry »

AN EXCERPT FROM THE WRITINGS
OF LAURENCE LUKE-BAZA

And in Venice, the game ended.
Read the rest of this entry »

Hello youse.

I haven’t seen Spartacus, but from what I hear there is a lot of blood in it and plenty of exposed breasts. I don’t know why I haven’t watched the show, because I enjoy both of these things. Don’t you think there are too many TV shows to watch these days? It seems like people are recommending new TV shows every week, and expecting you to buy a box set and watch about seven episodes before it starts to get good. Seriously! “You need to watch about the first five episodes to get properly into it.” Five hours?! You mad?! I barely have one spare hour these days, never mind five.

But let me say this. Whenever I do have some spare time, I want to play some board games with my lovely friends. And now I can play Spartacus: The Board Game. And it’s bloody brilliant.
Read the rest of this entry »

Hello youse.

There are a lot of zombie themed board games. Let’s be honest – everything has a zombie theme these days. Films, TV shows, lipstick – zombies are everywhere. But the greatest zombie board game of all time was Mall of Horror. I’ve told you about it before. I made a little video about it. I love it. But it’s long out of print, and very difficult to find.

Now, City of Horror comes along. Where Mall of Horror was the low budget, cool, indie zombie masterpiece, City of Horror is the big budget remake. Everything is bigger, everything is slicker, and remarkably EVERYTHING IS BETTER. This game is my darling Mall of Horror with the niggles fixed and the action ramped up to the maximum. If you buy any board game this year, it must be this. Let’s chat a little bit about it.

Read the rest of this entry »

Hello youse,

Having played exactly NO board games this week, because of work and Dishonored, I come to you empty-handed. I have no new board games to recommend. Your money is safe for one week. OR IS IT? I’ve spoken before about my mistrust of Kickstarter. I just feel icky and weird about it. I veer between “Fucking Parasites!” and “Oh coooool!” But my mistrust is making me feel like a party-pooper, so I’ve decided to join the rest of those idiots and back something. Join me as I take a look at some of the board games we could back right now on Kickstarter. And join me in making the leap. Let’s back a potential turkey!
Read the rest of this entry »

Hello youse.

This week’s column will be straight to the point. It will barely be a review. It will be a body of text designed to make you hurry into action. There will be no photos. I want you to google and find the photos yourself, on your way to buying the game. The X-Wing Miniatures Game is going to sell fast, guaranteed. I’m hearing talk that it might not reprint until January, and that would be a disaster for you, because you really should have this to play on Christmas Day.
Read the rest of this entry »