Posts Tagged ‘fable II’

Dear Mr Microsoft and Mr Molyneux

By Alec Meer on December 30th, 2008.

I’ve been having a lovely time playing your Fable II videogame on the Xbox Three Hundred and Sixty entertainment machine over Festivus, but sadly all the while I couldn’t help but think “gosh! If only this was also available on the IBM Compatible electronic typing machine.” Because then I’d be able to write many thoughtful words about it on this delightful weblog, and any of our lovely readers who feel RPGs are a bit too grim’n’guts’n’gunplay these days could relax into something entirely light-hearted and so delightfully determined to reward rather than penalise its players.

Please heed our calls, good sirs. You were gentlemanly enough to give us a PC edition of Fable The First a short time after its Xbox The First release, so we fully anticipate this bright-eyed ruffian arriving on our doorstep any day now. If it was available on dear Madame PC, you’d also be able to use her many buttons to fix the horrific spell selection system. That would be nice, wouldn’t it?
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Sloppy Seconds

By Alec Meer on August 15th, 2008.

Like a PC game, but not

A lot of people – both outside and inside the games industry – seem to forget that we’re a PC blog. Which is understandable, as so do we on occasion, and Walker still finds any opportunity to post about Phoenix bloody Wright games.

So there’s certain console stuff we occasionally feel a yen to mention here, but we can’t really get away with it, unless we couch it in excuses and straw man arguments. Similarly, we’ll get a tip-off about something neat or a press release about a promising game, and it’s of no use to us. Doubly confusing are those games that logic would suggest will inevitably make their way to PC, but publisher paranoia (and Xbox-is-all mentality) precludes them from confirming it. GTA 4‘s an obvious example – clearly we were all playing it when it was released, and clearly too it’d turn up on PC before too long, but writing about it here seemed too much of a stretch. Plus, hey, the entire rest of the internet wouldn’t shut up about it, perhaps making RPS something of a respite from Bellicmania.

There are others, most specifically – to our minds, anyway – Fable 2.
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Chicken-Chaser

By Alec Meer on November 15th, 2007.

As an alternative to their usual marketing strategy of making design promises they can’t possibly keep, Lionhead have come up with a new way of exciting fans – asking them to hurl abuse. Specifically, to think up a new insult to be proferred by NPCs who’ve taken a dislike to your character in Fable 2, replacing the outgoing ‘Arseface’.

The rules? Simple:

“Puerile, but not too puerile, sound at least somewhat original, and not cross a certain line (as an example, “gobshite” has been rejected because, while it might sound funny and wacky to American ears, it’s still a bit too strong for Fable and British ears).The thing to remember is that it’s a way for Fable villagers to call the Hero an arsehole because they hate him/her and obviously needs to work for both genders.”

Of course, the real reason to read Lionhead’s post is not to submit your own hiiiiiilarious put-down, but to stare in horror at what absolute, moronic filth the wretched internet cretins who probably think such a challenge is the reason they were put on this Earth have come up with so far. Elegant examples to date include “Skankmuncher”, “Wank stain”, “Poodildo”, “Spacktard” and “King of rim”. Dear Christ. This probably wasn’t a good idea, was it? For mercy’s sake, RPS community, get over there and give poor Lionhead an invective they can actually use.

For my money, the original’s tamer insult, as seen in this post’s headline, remains The Win.

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