Rock, Paper, Shotgun

The apparently ongoing attempts to educate mystified RPS editors in the ways of foot-to-ball continue today with the release of the “Pro Evolution Soccer 2009 Demonstration”. It seems that this particular sporting demonstration is one of the most sophisticated we’re likely to see this year, with improved artificial intelligence routines, splendid animation, and “tweaked” physics. All this to make the new and exciting outdoor activity of foot-to-ball seem even more appealling when played on a computer screen instead of a well-manicured sport-lawn. Foot-to-ball fans are able to play as the Manchester Uniteds, the Liverpools, the Real Madrids, and the Barcelonas, or the Italian or French national foot-to-ball representatives. The necessary files can be procured as a 1gb bundle from here. Fascinating stuff, you’ll agree.

Though we may hide our various lights under an electronic bushel, in the real world an exciting new hobby has proven itself exceedingly popular: foot-to-ball. It’s so beloved of British gentlemen that they will literally kill one other to demonstrate their enthusiasm for it. It’s simply spiffing that modern men are so unafraid to display their passions in public.

Astoundingly, foot-to-ball is not an actively solely engaged in with a physical foot and ball. It has lately also made its way to the personal electronic home computer system, in a form where one’s feet remain entirely uninvolved. I profess I do not entirely understand the logic – why not simply venture outdoors and apply one’s foot to a ball oneself? – but nonetheless I have just now had the curious privelege of playing the demonstration version of the new Fee-Fi-Fo-Fum 90 foot-to-ball simulation program. Read on to discover my experiences of this bad-tempered gentlemen’s preferred pastime.
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The activity known as Foot-to-ball has once again received an updated videogame incarnation in the form of he mysteriously abbreviated UEFA Euro 2008. We’ve discovered vital footage of this weirdly ritualised activity, and we’ve posted it after the jump in an attempt to understand it.

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It’s seems that the popular provincial sport of foot-to-ball is to made into a videogame in 2008. The game, which is mysteriously entitled “UEFA EURO 2008″, is set to be released to coincide with a highly significant foot-to-ball championship later this year:

GameTrailers, you are never “off side”.

While no one here at RPS fully understands the meaning of ‘football’ we do realise that the beautiful game does hold many of you in its boisterous thrall. We are therefore pleased to announce that the better football game, Pro Evolution Soccer, has a 1.1gb downloadable demonstration of its most recent incarnation, “2008″, available for your perusal. This new game reportedly features all the most important elements of a football sessions: kicking, heading, goaling, and advertising.

Does RPS need a football expert? Probably. Now, back to my sniper rifle fantasies…

We understand that some of our readers are fond of a sport called Foot-to-Ball, played by young men with fashionable haircuts and uncomplicated wives. Part of its underground popularity has been fueled by the long-running rendition of the sport in videogamingvision by a small, independent company know as Electronic Arts.

Rumour has it that there is to be a new iteration of the game this year, which with forward thinking is titled “Fifa 08″. It will once more recreate the simple rules of this Sunday afternoon activity, even going so far as to find out the names of those who have signed up as members of the various teams, and including them as a kind nod to the dedicated.

If this is all too much of a muddle, perhaps you might like to have a brief sample of it all in the form of a Demonstration Download, available from Electronic Arts’ website here.