Dear Diary…. wait, is that too formal? Yo, Diary? Wotcha, Mr. D? Never mind. Busy week, this week. I said goodbye to my parents, a demon made me write him a love letter, and I learned how to set people on fire with the power of my mind! Then… then things got weird.
P.S. Donald, if you’re reading this, you now have cooties. And give back my bra.