[Earth-shaking slapping sounds can be heard in the distance, like fresh lard being cannon-fired at an ancient war drum]
Do you hear that?
[A glass of water ripples ominously; a largely decorative Jello mold does the same, but fails to be particularly frightening]
Something’s coming. Something big.
[Dogs whine, horses stomp frantically, one or two people glance up from Western-shootout-caliber staredowns with Facebook on their phones]
It’s… it’s… SEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL.