Posts Tagged ‘if you hear yourself saying tldr this is not the game for you’

Wot I Think: Heroes Rise: The Prodigy / The Hero Project

By Richard Cobbett on June 26th, 2014.

They say a picture's worth a thousand words, and in my line of work, I should know. For the dame who entered my office just now though, I only need the one. And it's not like it's going to be 'no.'
‘You are the detective, are you not?'
I nod. That's what it says on the door. ‘Course, the side of it she came in from's not seen much footfall these past days. Not had much reason to go out myself, since getting that special on gin.
‘What can I do for you, Miss-‘
The dame holds up a gloved finger. ‘Mrs,' she corrects. ‘Mrs. Pembrose-Amberley.'
‘Pembrose-‘ I know that name. ‘As in Pembrose-Amberley, the Screenshot King?'
‘My husband went missing three days ago,' she says, lighting up a long white cigarette. ‘I don't think I have to tell you what that means.'
She does not. If the Screenshot King is gone, that means the Textual Revolution may finally have made its move against the graphical bourgeoisie.
‘I'll take the case,' I tell her. We both know it's a formality.

Heroes Rise proudly declares itself the first text adventure on Steam. Pffft. Reading words? On a screen? That someone wrote? Who’s got time for that nonsense, eh? What’s that, Graham? I do what for a living? Ah. I have just been informed that I was just kidding. Who needs graphics anyway? But! Do its first two parts have the power to overclock and fully exploit the most powerful gaming processor in the world, the Intel i7 47YOUR MOIST HUMAN BRAIN? Here’s Wot I Think…

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