Rock, Paper, Shotgun

There’s a panic inside the Homeless Shelter headquarters of that international terrorist cell, The Liberal Crime Squad. The forces of oppression are at the gates; Blue-clad fascists ready to stomp down on our freedom to watch Comedy Central, deal soft drugs and kidnap, beat up and occasionally kill mostly innocent people. The spirit of the Paris Commune is in the air. Our hour of destiny is at hand. We have no idea what happens now. Sure, some instructions spit pop up on the screen, but we’re hardly going to read them.

This is the final Rebel without a Pause Key. And this is the Liberal Crime Squad.

And we’re going to off the pigs. Or run away. Or both.
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We left the people’s revolution in somewhat dire straits last time. Alec Furious, heroic leader, ended up in hospital. His second, Alecina Furious, gets talked into being a housewise or something by a phallocratic oppressor or something. We’re left with a bunch of hippies and teenagers Alec managed to recruit to before being beaten up by the lackeys of the state who turned counter-revolutionary due to being shot at. That said, it’s not all bad. When browsing opinion polls, the following nugget brings us hope.

Some know our names. And some of them even like us. In fact (hits calculator) that means there’s a 4.5 million (COUNT ‘EM!) people who approve of our activities in America. This is enough to show that Alec and Alecina’s sacrifices weren’t in vain. The revolution cannot be contained!

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Last time we left our revolutionary, Alec Furious, alone in his homeless shelter, making plans and hanging up his neat Che Guevara poster. Let’s have a look at our wide-eyed Trotskyite.

That noise you hear? It’s Capitalism’s knees quaking, for it has seen its nemesis’ face. He’s got a level 1 assault rifle skill, and he’s not afraid to use it.
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News reaches me that Ultro-ASCII game Dwarf Fortress is having its latest release tonight, so while we wait for that, I thought I’d try something else. One of Bay 12’s older games. Namely, this:

Watch out forces of conservative oppression: I’m all hopped up on Lentils, I’ve been listening to Rage Against The Machine for the last four hours and I haven’t tidied my bedroom.

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