Posts Tagged ‘Reality Twist’

Coast Guard – Is It The Greatest Coast Guard Game Of All Time?!

After its extraordinary trailer, I’m glad to report/sad to say that Coast Guard is everything we could have hoped for. I struggled through the first hour of this wave-protecting simulation, videoed it all, and edited that horror down to the twenty minutes that’s safe for you to watch.

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Cheese It, It’s The Five-Ocean! Coast Guard Released


Let’s go back to a few weeks ago and hide behind a bin to see John giggle like a schoolgirl on glue as he watches a trailer for Coast Guard [Steam page, ‘cos it has no site]. Now let’s come back to a time he would then have considered the future to discover – great Scott! – that the quirky sim is now out. Seacops!

It’s all about the lives and duties of seacops, roaming around around on their fancy boats, rescuing people, putting out fires, and (!) solving seacrimes. Developers Reality Twist have a string of shonky sims to their name but the idea is splendid. Seacops!

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Trailer Breakdown: EVERYTHING Is Brilliant About The Coast Guard Trailer

Sometimes you can read a game description and think, “Hmmm, I’m not sure which way this one might go.” And then sometimes you watch the trailer and you’re like, “OH MY GOODNESS I AM IN LOVE”. Sadly, there’s no way Coast Guard [Steam page] could ever be as good as the trailer for Coast Guard, because it is literally the best thing that’s ever happened on planet Earth.

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Bang Boom Pow Pop: Fireworks Simulator Released


“Developed by certified pyrotechnicians” declares the launch trailer for Fireworks Simulator, and I am excited. While some people dream of driving trucks or ploughing fields, I’ve always wanted dominion over colourful explosions. But it’s too expensive to get into as a hobby, and surely too niche a profession for a chancer to slip into, so here I’ve been waiting for Fireworks Simulator. Picking my own music, selecting my favourite fireworks, and timing them all together for one building celebration of combustion sounds wonderful.

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The Flare Path: Inspired By True Emergencies

Today in The Flare Path…

  • I gloss over the fact that I’ve spent most of the past week sprawled on a dusty kilim waiting for the likes of DaPerforator, \\\Your_Wurst_Nightmare///, and BeatrixPotshotter to poke their heads above pockmarked parapets.
  • I win the Battle of Gettysburg in under eight minutes.
  • I attempt to recreate Operation Chariot using a state-of-the-art Deutsche Gesellschaft zur Rettung Schiffbrüchiger maritime rescue cruiser.

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