Posts Tagged ‘The Flare Path’

The Flare Path: Tales Of The Unexpected

By Tim Stone on June 13th, 2014.

Blimey! What a week! Not only did Harris, the Flare Path quartermaster, pick up twenty thousand exclamation marks dirt cheap at a local fire sale, the world of flight simulation was rocked by a trio of 2000lb news Paveways!!! We literally can’t move for !s in the office at present! I’m actually thinking of taking a saw to some of them! Extra full stops and ‘i’ dots are always useful, and the uprights could be resold as war clubs! For ants!! Or other tiny invertebrates!!! With a fondness for melee!!!!

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The Flare Path’s D-Day D-Tour

By Tim Stone on June 6th, 2014.

I say, you cut that a bit fine. A minute later and 43-15211 would have slipped the surly bonds of earth/RAF Chivenor. Flare Path’s 70th Anniversary D-Day day trip would have left without you!

As you’ll know having read the glossy brochure from cover to cover, this year we’re doing something a little different. Instead of crossing the Channel and buzzing the invasion beaches and DZs, we’re staying in Blighty. Today we’ll be visiting places in southern England with interesting links to D-Day and remembering those unlucky liberators that perished closer to friendly shores than hostile ones.

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The Flare Path: Slitherincoming

By Tim Stone on May 30th, 2014.

On May 14th this year, Castello di Pavone, one of Northern Italy’s swankiest strongholds, was invaded by an army of conflict-obsessed game developers. Were the devs in question…

a) Laser-scanning the fortress for a level in the soon-to-be-announced Hidden & Dangerous 3?
b) Laser-scanning the fortress for a level in the soon-to-be-announced Commandos 5?
c) Laser-scanning the fortress for a level in the soon-to-be-announced Bella Cantarella*?
d) Attending Home of Wargamers 2014, a Slitherine Group press conference?

*Flare Path Soft’s debut project – a poison-sprinkled serving-wench sim set during the War of the Holy League.

If you crossed your fingers and answered a, b, or c, this week’s column may prove disappointing. Read the rest of this entry »

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The Flare Path: Victory Over The Ants

By Tim Stone on May 16th, 2014.

Greetings from the Word Sahara, the place where RPS writers find themselves when they run out of interesting ways to introduce game news. I’ve been trudging across the dunes for the past hour-and-a-half and apart from stumbling upon a wrecked P-40 Kittyhawk with the words “BEWARE OF THE ANTS!” daubed on its canopy, and glimpsing a shimmering Battle of the Nile in the far distance, there’s been nothing to break the monotony. Naval Action, Open General, sorry, I’ve failed you. Read the rest of this entry »

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The Flare Path: Wingsuitable For All

By Tim Stone on May 9th, 2014.

Turn up at The Flare Path Medical Centre suffering from depression and it’s highly likely Dr. Merriweather MD, MBChB, ICBM, B&Q, QWOP will suggest you go hurl yourself off the top of a mountain. The good Doctor’s advice isn’t quite as callous or irresponsible as it first appears. He simply understands the restorative power of whizzo wingsuit games like Volo Airsport and Wingsuitflyer.

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The Flare Path’s May Day Parade

By Tim Stone on May 2nd, 2014.

…was a bit of a fiasco this year. The Maus replica managed to wedge itself between Specsavers and Cash Converters forcing everyone behind it (85% of the parade) to detour through the Quaker Burial Ground. The counter-IED systems on the Humvees shut down several life support machines in the local hospital. And perhaps most regrettable of all, due to a schedule mix-up, the flypast by the Red Harrows ended-up coinciding with the release of 1000 peace doves. If it hadn’t been for the impressive post-parade firing demonstration put on by SAM Simulator’s SA-8B Geckos, and the thrilling mock battle staged by Graviteam Tactics: Mius Front’s T-34s and StuGs, the event would have been a total disaster.

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The Flare Path: Wharf Fortress

By Tim Stone on April 25th, 2014.

An MH-6 tells me you’ve got seven minutes to spare and are willing to spend those seven minutes reading about irradiated Soviet submariners and irresistible race sim eclecticism. As the MH-6 in question lives inside my subwoofer, is made entirely from rose petals, and every year recommends I bet on Durham in The Boat Race, I generally ignore him. On this occasion however, I’m rather hoping he’s right. Read the rest of this entry »

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The Flare Path: And The Long Good Friday

By Tim Stone on April 18th, 2014.

Traditionally, Christian Flareopaths spend Good Friday deep in prayer, while heathen ones spend it deep in brass, brine, or cumulonimbus. A bad case of housemaid’s knee and a dead PSU means I can’t play or pray today. I’m desperately hoping the ten activities detailed below will prove engaging enough to keep boredom at bay until bedtime.

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The Flare Path: For Horsemen Of The Apocalypse

By Tim Stone on April 11th, 2014.

Here at Flare Path we take flight simulation extremely seriously. When a company like Eagle Dynamics goes to the trouble of releasing a free aerodyne as lifelike and lively as the ‘new’ DCS World Mustang, we believe it’s important that machine is flown responsibly and realistically. If you know yourself to be a hellraiser, a tearaway, a speed merchant, a rowdy, a clown, a daisy botherer or a beret shredder, be sure to read the following Enjoyment Guide before clambering into the cockpit of the weaponless TF-51D.

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The Flare Path: A Rumble Of Thunder (Part Two)

By Tim Stone on April 4th, 2014.

The samovars have gone cold. The cigarette-smoke butterflies have dispersed. The commissar is starting to scribble names in his little red notebook… it’s time my intrepid but incompetently led Combat Mission: Red Thunder Soviets roused themselves and got on with the second part of the Battle of Baronovichi. Read the rest of this entry »

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The Flare Path: A Rumble Of Thunder

By Tim Stone on March 28th, 2014.

Anyone eager to spend a modest portion of their Friday shaking their head and tutting while a tactical halfwit sends virtual Soviet soldiers to their deaths, is in luck. A lend-lease version of the close-to-release Combat Mission: Red Thunder‎ has just been craned onto my bustling quay by my bustling stevedore, Steve Dore. Give me a second to finish my molotov cocktail, quietflowsthedon my ushanka, and retrieve my Bumper Book of Annoying Russian Clichés, and we can get started. Read the rest of this entry »

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The Flare Path: Close Combats Mundanity

By Tim Stone on March 21st, 2014.

It’s been another horribly humdrum week here in Simulatia. Since we last shared a screen, early access IL-2 Sturmovik: Battle of Stalingrad owners have acquired a handsome new cloud cleaver, a blistering Top Gear track legend has been added to Cornetto Hoarser, yet another ursine sim pitch has shambled onto Kickstarter, and the FBI has inspected an FSX install in the hope of finding clues to the disappearance of 239 people. What’s a man supposed to write about in drab times like these? Read the rest of this entry »

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The Flare Path: Rome, Commentary & The Lash

By Tim Stone on March 14th, 2014.

“In a couple of thousand years’ time bent-backed archaeologists are going to find the phrase ‘The Greased Pigs Rule!’ scratched into hypercaust tiles, carved on marble horse troughs, and written in tessera on villa floors. Being clever sorts they may guess who we were, but they’ll never fully understand how famous we were and how much that fame cost us in blood, sweat, and tears.” Read the rest of this entry »

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