Posts Tagged ‘Total War: Rome II’

Lovekill – CoH 2 and Total War: Rome 2 Weekend Trials

The stream represents the rift between us caused by my fear that I inevitably hurt people.

“This Valentine’s Day,” reads a sign in my bank’s window, “give the gift of buildings and contents insurance.” The cornershop plan to only serve couples maintaining physical contact. I’m facing eviction as, in lieu of rent money, my landlord demands a sworn statement that I think I’m capable of love. In this wacky world, I’m not at all surprised that Sega are marking Valentine’s Day with war.

Total War: Rome II and Company of Heroes 2 are both free for all to play this romantic weekend as part of some competition over free DLC. NBA 2K15 has a free Steam weekend trial too but it’s unrelated to both love and murder so let’s skip over it.

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It’s A-Parta The Plan! Total War: Rome II – Wrath of Sparta

This. Is. A screenshot.

It’s a shame that the promotional machinery of video games moves so rapidly these days, because it would have been Just Plain Charming had Sega been able to announce this Total War: Rome II campaign expansion two hundred and eighty-nine days ago.

Then again, it would have wildly inaccurate to do so because Wrath of Sparta is set about sixty years after some well-oiled Greeks with CGI torsos fought off thirty million Persians [citation needed], and as we all know video games rarely play fast and loose with historical facts.

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Premium Patching: Total War Rome 2 Emperor’s Edition

Still waiting for Dota 2: Lord Edition.

I lead a high-end life and have high-end tastes: penthouse suites, the finest champagne, custom cars, and Cuban cigars the size of your forearm. I demand the same from my video games. The Premium Edition, that’s the one I’ll buy with my many dollars. Gold Edition. Titanium Edition. Blood Red Edition. Deluxe Edition. Ultimate Sith Edition. Collector’s Edition, oh yes; I collect the finest.

Total War: Rome II is now up to my standards, as it’s getting an Emperor Edition. Technically it’s only a renaming of the base game to mark the launch of a big patch and a free new story campaign, but just look at that name: Emperor Edition. That belongs in my Steam display cabinet.

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Rome II Daughters Of Mars DLC Adds Warrior Women

A how to session on creating fine gonad paste.

While some battle tactics are outstripped by technology, it’s actually gotten quite a lot easier to perform the above strategy thanks to the removal of platemail in modern times. Still equally as effective at causing extreme pain and temporary, floor-based groan-paralysis too. It’s part of the latest Total War: Rome II DLC ‘Daughters of Mars’, which adds a number of women-only formations to The Creative Assembly’s grand strategy. They’ve also released a free update providing some female units to a couple of factions and updating the roster of the Suebi.

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Fish, Hitler, And Naughty Language: DLC Is Bloody Weird

Shooting Hitler is weird

What do Hitler, Snoop Dogg, George Washington, and Shakespeare have in common? If you said they all appear in Rik Mayall’s autobiography Bigger Than Hitler, Better Than Christ*, you’re wrong. Washington and Snoop aren’t mentioned in that. The correct answer is that each has been digitised and reformed–Weird Science style–into your games as DLC.

There’s a lot of DLC out there, ranging from the mundane to the insane, and I think I know why. Games are increasingly serious business, with huge budgets and a cast amount of public scrutiny. DLC–well some of it–feels like the passion projects that don’t fit into the canon. An outlet for the stuff that gets cleared from the whiteboard for being too off message, or too niche. DLC is cathartic. I’ve been on a strange journey, readers. I’ve been looking through games catalogues and hunting down the sort of DLC that could be described as ’boutique’. I’ve been on a boutique call, ahahahahahahaha!

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Carry On Carthage: Rome 2 Hannibal At The Gates DLC

Total War: Rome II has probably had the most troubled existence of any Total War game, trampling on expectations like a giant war elephant crushing the skull of an infantry man. At least that’s the impression I had from comment threads and old ladies who stopped me in the street: my brain is not wired for grand strategy games, so I only played it for a short time and then abandoned it to the Recycle Bin. However, that won’t stop me pointing that out there’s a new DLC pack coming out: Hannibal At The Gates. The trailer below shows a whole lot of big talk for people facing a man with angry elephants at his disposal.
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Rebuild It In A Day: Total War: Rome II Mod Tools Arrive

I am a conscientious objector in the Total War war. I fight for neither side, and I shall declare no opinions about the controversies surrounding the release state of Total War: Rome II. All I shall do is report the facts, ma’am. Today’s fact is that devs the Creative Assembly have just released a beta version of the game’s Assembly Kit mod tools, which have been long expected/demanded by the TW community. That is a fact.
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Blood Money: Rome II Gets Paid Blood And Gore DLC

You cannot cut that which already has a NECK MADE OF BLOOD.

Blood! You and I – and all people, really – are full of it! If you cut us, we will dribble out red stuff until we are naught but pale, crumbling husks. That, more often than not, is how blood works. Total War: Rome II, however, begs to differ. First it implicitly argued that blood doesn’t exist at all, but now it’s had a change of heart and pumped its soldiers full of so much plasma that the slightest pin prick will make them pop like balloons full of cherry pie. It’s a, er, fun option, but there’s just one problem. The aptly titled “Blood and Gore” DLC? It costs money. Not a lot, but this is kind of an inconsequential feature – not so many clippity clopping steps removed from horse armor. And in light of Rome II’s list of rather glaring issues, this seems like kind of an odd time to charge for a glorified blood slider option.

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The Nomad Sorry: Rome II’s Temporarily Free DLC

No Mads here, please

Look, I don’t know what happened with Total War: Rome II: Total War II Rome. People are upset cos it was apparently a bit all over the place? It’s the first CA game that won’t be showing up on many GOTY lists? I didn’t even play it, I’m rubbish at TW games, so don’t look at me. It does seem like the Creative Assembly are trying to make amends at least – there’s been a steady stream of big fat patches, and now they’re giving out what was apparently (and later will be again) paid DLC for free.
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Et Tu, CA? – Rome II Devs Apologize For Issues

Total War: Rome II is in for some pretty big changes. Read all aboat it.

Total War: Rome II hardly signals the splintering, screaming fall of Creative Assembly’s strategic empire, but history has shown that over-extension is all too often the beginning of the end. But then, one might argue that pride came before the aforementioned falls, and Creative Assembly – to its credit – seems anything but. In the wake of an angry Internet beeswarm (of which Jim and Adam were a part, to varying degrees), the developer has issued an apology, promising to address complaints ranging from bugs and technical issues to entire swaths of gameplay.

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The RPS Verdict: Total War: Rome II


Jim and Adam sat down over a pint of internet to discuss the recently released imperial epic, Rome II. They had things on their mind.

Jim: So then. I am usually in the Total War apologist camp, but not this time. I am not sure if it’s because I had a better experience with Shogun 2, or whether there’s some kind of allergy due to over-exposure going on, but Rome II rubbed me up the wrong druid.
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Let’s Talk (And Play) Rome II Multiplayer

The Youtube generation has a lot to answer for. We used to call these “Gameplay Trailers” but now those hip young kids have their “Let’s Plays” and their “unboxing vids” and the ancient golems of PR, marketing and development are racing to catch up. Creative Assembley’s latest Rome II effort has two rad fellows spitting rhymes (disclaimer: may not contain rhymes) and throwing info about new features in the strategy sequel. Then they realise what we’re all here for and get down to proxy-beating on one another via the medium of tiny digital men. Onward, to glory!

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Try And Trireme Again: Total War – Rome II

Professor Veronica Marbles, chair of the Serious Person’s Classical History Forum, would almost certainly be outraged by the contents of the video below. It’s almost four minutes of naval combat in Total War: Rome II, you see, and it’s so preposterously crunchy and wonderfully dramatic that it can’t possibly reflect the reality of wooden ships at war. At one point a pack of smaller ships surround a larger vessel, punching holes out of its hull, like particularly angry jackals swarming across an elephant. Boarding operations resemble terrifying alien invasions, furious creatures pouring from deck to deck with no regard for life or limb. One ship simply chooses to disintegrate on impact. Surely, Professor Marbles, this was not the way of it? “THE RIGGING IS IMPERFECTLY PORTRAYED”

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