Cleopatra does what ‘any mother would do’ in the latest trailer for Total Rome: Two War – builds the impossible, sleeps with the enemy, brings ruin on her people, suckles a wolf (metaphorically), feeds the beast (metaphor again), and kills her sister (not a metaphor). There’s no mention of a dalliance with an asp but presumably that particular part of the tale is still to be told. I’d feel rotten if my mum reckoned she’d brought about the end of a dynasty, the fall of a people and the murder of a family member on my behalf, but maybe it’s a bit like the time she dropped a birthday cake and reckoned it was my fault because I was being ‘giddy and distracting’. Unlikely. I was a solemn and dignified six-year old, and preferred Camus to cake.