Valve Gets Musical

Valve have just announced that The Orange Box is to have one more disc inside. A single, written by the excellent geek-turned-geek-singer, Jonathan Coulton, and members of the Valve writing staff, is to accompany the five games already bulging its cardboardy edges. (Presumably those ordering through Steam will be given a download).

Maddeningly (for both you and me), I know what the song is, and I will be murdered if I say. And I also know that I thought only yesterday, “Valve really ought to release that song as a single.” So clearly my thoughts control Valve’s actions. Know this: it’s incredibly good.

I’m just off to think about Valve giving me a well-paid job on their writing staff now.


  1. Dan says:

    Do you reckon we can make it number one?

  2. John Walker says:

    With single sales in both the UK and America, I think it should pretty much qualify on pre-orders alone.

    Someone should point that out to Valve.

  3. Marco M. says:

    Better than the Team Fortress 2 theme that I’m obsessively listening over and over and using to wake up in the morning since around a week?

  4. Kast says:

    I’ve been listening to the HL2 soundtrack a lot lately. And even more than that, Absconditus by Zhaytee for MINERVA. And I’ve just noticed he’s released five more tunes for the latest release – I’ll have to download them when I’m next on my desktop. Anyway, check ’em out here:

    link to

  5. Pentadact says:

    Way better. I’m a fan of Coulton’s zombie memo Re: Your Brains, but this song tops it. Had it stuck in my head for a week after. John, did you notice the… other version of it? Early on?

  6. John Walker says:

    Shhhhhhhhhh Tom! Shhhhhhhhhhhh!

  7. Miles says:

    I wasn’t going to buy the orange box UNTIL NOW

  8. James Lyon says:

    It better not be a cover of REM’s Orange Crush, with the ‘Crush’ replaced with ‘Box’

    “Team Fortress 2, Team Fortress 2. / I’ve got my Steam, I’ve got my Orange Box.
    Portal too, Portal too. / I’ve got my Steam, I’ve got my Orange Box.”

  9. Freelancepolice says:

    I want the TF2 theme :(

  10. solios says:

    Follow me, don’t follow me… I’ve got a Mac, I want the Orange Box….

  11. James Lyon says:

    I think I’ve confused Jonathan Coulton with Weird Al Yankovic.

  12. Marco M. says:

    Freelancepolice: you can find the TF2 theme in mp3 format in the following folder:

    \Steam\steamapps\[yourSteamIdHere]\team fortress 2\tf\sound\ui

  13. Gulag says:

    It’s the song the engineer was strumming in his vid, isn’t it?

  14. Mike says:

    Wow! Having heard the song, I am so excited that we’re getting this on a nice shiny CD.

    I’m going to be listening to it all the way through launch day on my headphones and cackling because my officemates won’t have… ahem… experienced it.

  15. MaW says:

    Do we still get it if we’ve bought the Orange Box on Steam?

  16. Masked Dave says:


    However, does the song not count as a spoiler for Episode 2? Should I not listen to it until after playing? (I really hate spoilers.)

  17. John Walker says:

    You should definitely not listen to it before playing the Orange Box.

  18. Liz says:

    Oh. Such an excellent song! I like to listen to it on repeat.

    Beat the games first. Then listen to it.

  19. Smurfy says:

    Bump because I live in a bin!