Bethesda, Portal, Tree, K.i.s.s.i.n.g.


Bethesda are big fans of Portal. I mean, obv. It’s getting the point where we could dub Room 5’s Make Luv with “Portal” replacing “Party” and no-one would blink. But level designer Daryl Brigner loves it so much that when he got home from working out where to put Mutants and walls and mutant walls in Fallout 3, he went and made his own level. You can downoad it over here, weighing in at 1.29MB (Or the size of – oooh – about 0.08 Peggles). You install it by following the instructions in the readme. Like, double obv. It’s hard. By which we mean, we couldn’t do it by looking at it and the first two things we thought of.

Whether this means that Oblivion’s Gates were strangely precognitive fanfic has yet to be ascertained.


  1. Theory says:

    Definitely the best custom Portal map.

  2. Matt says:

    Still pretty buggy tho. I keep falling through the floor and getting stuck. Interesting puzzels however.

  3. Seniath says:

    Aye, there’s an issue with the energy pellet passing through walls. But that’ll only happen if you’re doing it /wrong/ anyhow, so it’s all good :D

  4. Ging says:

    I enjoyed it – didn’t have any issues with falling through the floor mind you.

    It took a while to get the energy ball into the right place – but that was because I wasn’t thinking with portals!

  5. KindredPhantom says:

    I like the photoshop at the beginning of the article.

  6. Pod says:

    I’m really dissapointed to find out that the title image is just a photoshop, and not he actual level :(

  7. Jay says:

    Interesting map, the first custom map I played so far, 0,5h spent on fun and completed it of course. I lost a couple of companion balls because they fell through the floor and the energy ball got noclipped a lot when turning the room, if you know what I mean :>

  8. John Walker says:

    Those Oblivion gates really look like vaginas, don’t they?

  9. Alan Dexter says:

    No they don’t. Unless something is very wrong.

  10. Kieron Gillen says:

    John may not have seen a Vagina for a while.


  11. Piratepete says:

    John you really need to get a better class of women, preferably not by hanging round the nearest VD clinic to pick them up, and if the women you go out with all have ‘bits’ like that may I suggest some shares in Canestan.

  12. Jon says:

    I push butan and nothing happens….

  13. Man Raised By Puffins says:

    If you do play it, know that the first switch you press unlocks that door you can see. It took me a long time to figure that out, because in Portal there’s not normally a concept of ‘locked’ and ‘unlocked’, only closed and open – and the switch doesn’t open the door.

    From Tom Francis’ blog, which is what, I presume, Jon is referring to.

    Those Oblivion gates really look like vaginas, don’t they?

    Nah, although that strategically placed flame makes them seem a little goatse-esque.

  14. roBurky says:

    I’ve got four locked doors, a big orange room full of water and no idea what to do. Do I just need to look harder or has some scripting gone wrong and one of these doors should be open?

  15. roBurky says:

    Oops, that’s a different map. Downloaded too many at once…

  16. Jon says:

    But I’ve pushed the button and it’s still locked when I walk up to it… Goes off to play it again.

  17. Jon says:

    ok, so I’ve just got the ball walked through the door, climbed down the ladder and pressed the button on my left. Should the door below the 1 dot symbol be unlocked now?

  18. Cradok says:

    It took me longer to realise that the switch controlled the angled platform than I did doing everything else. I also found getting the energy ball in more frustrating than puzzling. Still, a very good effort, and I did love the rotating room.