Presenting The RPS Talk-O-Tron 3000

Good gentlefolk,
I bring glad tidings. We have made a unexpected breakthrough! Thanks to science and witchcraft, Rock, Paper, Shotgun now offers for your pleasure a ‘forum’ upon which men from the ‘internet’ may ‘talk’ to one another. We call it the Talk-o-Tron 3000, in tribute to the 2,999 unicorns that perished during its torturous creation. And to the one that yet lives, though I fear it shall never dance again.

Please, go forth and word-procreate upon it. But first, a few brief, essential statements you should know.

– It is very much what internet colloquialism refers to as a ‘beater.’ The design needs a fair bit of tweaking, much may explode and much may change. Make your realistic and constructive suggestions for such changes in the appropriate place. Please do not, however, deposit your griping about how forums are a waste of time here. For that would truly be a waste of time.

– You do not have to register to read, but registering does grant you posting rights, and means the system can keep track of what you have and haven’t read. Also your comments Gravatars should carry over, so long as you use the same email address.

– Standard rules of gentlemanly behaviour apply: no prejudice, no abuse, no grammar fascism, no sharing of pirated (im)materials, no picking of fights. We shall truck no savagery here.

– We intend to keep it relatively separate from the main site: please discuss stories posted here here, rather than there.

– We will in time be seeking moderators. Do not come to us – we shall come to you. In the night. Wearing hosiery.

Now, away with ye!

And for a convenient place to start, let’s start with some introductions in the introduction thread.


  1. Ian says:

    Hosiery? I’m in.

  2. Ketch says:

    This pleases me!

  3. Malagate says:

    You had me at ‘beater’.

    hur hur hur, ‘beater.

  4. Fashigady says:

    RPS is getting pretty impressive what with the steam group, the TF2 server, the podcast, and now a forum. What’s next?

  5. Heliocentric says:

    Rps just sold out to the angry internet man.

    For real though.

    Most gaming forums are either too console focused or to focused on a specific game. This might be interesting. I still feel the steam group is the true “rps community”.

  6. ChaosSmurf says:

    [i]We shall truck no savagery here.[/i]

  7. Dante says:


    Why is your post beige? I thought that was a reserved only for the for gods of RPS themselves?

  8. Jim Rossignol says:

    Looks like forum registration ties you into our contributor theme. Will fix.

  9. Feet says:

    Awesome stuff.

  10. Bobsy says:

    Disappointing! Oh my sirs, for this injustice to be thrust upon our unhappy busoms in this twilight hour! Thy forum software is based upon the vile UBB format we have grown to abhor! Why do ye, cultured gentlemen of wit and poise, refuse to acknowledge the superiority and sophistication of Beehive?

    For shame! SHAAAAAME!

  11. James says:

    Be fixed, you bast.

  12. Ben Abraham says:


    Grats! Temporary and fading glory, but what magnificent glory it be!

  13. Tom says:

    I would have thought some kind of threaded comments section would have been better to be honest, rather than a fill blown forum. Much like Shacknews’ for example. Comments that spur debate tend to get more attention that way. Although, as ever, it does greatly depend upon the debaters. Forums are just too all-encompassing for sites so focused.

  14. James G says:

    This is good news, I think. I was just about to suggest adding a link at the top, only to find that you have already done so you clever people. I shall be registering for forum postage shortly.

  15. AbyssUK says:

    The forum goes a bit odd with my fox lingo firefox extension, its highlight word pop-up box actually embeds into the post which is funny

  16. ImperialCreed says:

    Nice one RPS. Looking forward to the inevitable flame wars and troll plagues :)

  17. Mr Pink says:

    This is very bad news for my PhD…

  18. Muzman says:

    Not dancing is a sure symptom of excess guilt of the feet/hooves.

  19. MonkeyMonster says:

    Average wait time on the ye olde p/w email ? Been over 30 mins I feel or that could all be due to a watched inbox never updates syndrome…

  20. Alec Meer says:

    Should be more or less instant. Checketh yon spam folder’s maw.

  21. The Hammer says:


  22. MonkeyMonster says:

    Twas not instant in the arrivals lounge alas – shakes fist at angry internet man for slowing it! But hot diggity am alive n kicking! (sent 3.12 arrived 3.50 – go figure)

  23. sana says:

    I would be pleased if you could concentrate on proper forum titles instead of using the usual… “wacky” phrases for that.

  24. Klaus says:

    It has occurred to me that if I register soon, later on I can be elitist and grumpy.

    “RPS is getting pretty impressive what with the steam group, the TF2 server, the podcast, and now a forum. What’s next?”
    An RPS RPG, or FPS obviously. Or a dating sim, which would be kawaii. ^_~

  25. Nero says:

    Excellent. I’ve had experience with the Talk-o-Tron 1500 but not this new version so I’m eager to check it out. Lovely.

  26. Trousers says:

    Most excellent, I’m surprised the podcast came before this, but either way this is great.

  27. Scandalon says:

    Fashigady – wait, what, we have a TF2 server? WHY WAS I NOT INFORMED?!? (Seriously…where?)

  28. teo says:

    yay, great
    only downside is the ads taking up so much room

  29. TentSalesman says:

    The TF2 server lives here:

  30. Down Rodeo says:

    Hoo boy, I feel stupid as the first poster who has not been able to register. It tells me my password is wrong but I am fairly certain that it isn’t (I might be mistaken but I have tried several times). If I am wrong, well, I’m sorry for inconveniencing you guys; as it stands it no worky for me. The username and e-mail are the same as here – it has occurred to me that the space in my name could be an issue as it often is. Yes I have seen the “lost password” button but I figure if it hasn’t worked the first time then for the sake of beaters I might as well inform you. Also I guess since I haven’t logged in once yet your server probably wouldn’t give me a second chance.

  31. Kadayi says:

    “I still feel the steam group is the true “rps community”.”

    Nice to see the elitism is creeping in already.

  32. StalinsGhost says:


    That is all.

  33. RichPowers says:

    Wait, RPS has a TF2 server?! Is it hosted in the UK?

  34. Pace says:

    Well, seems quite popular. Something like 750 posts in, what, 7 hours?

  35. Andrew Doull says:

    Will be interesting to see how this helps the RPS-money-o-meter as I hear forums are where the traffic is at. Good luck!

  36. Mil says:

    @Down Rodeo:
    You have to use the password you get in the registration e-mail.

  37. yxxxx says:

    Mil says:

    @Down Rodeo:
    You have to use the password you get in the registration e-mail.

    yeah and if you copy and paste make sure that you dont have any spaces copied or else you will get the wrong password thing up.

    oh and if doing it manual like take care of caps and things like o 0

  38. Satsuz says:

    I like forums. I like RPS. Time to see if these tastes go well with one another, methinks.

  39. Dorian Cornelius Jasper says:

    On Hosiery:

    For a second there, I was wondering whether you gentlemen had the legs to pull it off. Then I realized that whether you did or not, you’d find some way to make it work.

  40. Down Rodeo says:

    I did try all those. I mean, what other password would I put in the box? I shall try again, I suppose.