Oh Christ: First Watchmen Footage

My photoshop skills are weak. BUT MY CONCEPTUALISM IS STRONG.
No good can come of this. The first Watchmen video’s beneath the cut.

Honestly, nice try guys, but you may as well turn Anna Karenina into a Railroad Tycoon clone.


  1. McCool says:

    I want to die.

  2. Max says:

    Was that Batman?

  3. iLIKETRAINS says:

    I want them to die.

  4. Antsy says:

    Watchmen: The End Is Meh

  5. LewieP says:

    but who watches them

  6. Arathain says:

    Oh, hello worst fears.

  7. A Button says:

    You say the video game industry completely missed the point? That they made an awful-looking brawler instead of an interesting game?

    What a delightful jest.

  8. Nameykins says:

    Oh man, that would have looked awful even without the Watchmen connection,

  9. Grandstone says:

    hooraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay fascism

  10. Scallat says:

    This is the worst thing.

  11. Dain says:

    Weird, was just reading the Watchman movie thread on the forum..

  12. GG.Garcia says:

    I’m still of the opinion that making a Watchmen game to tie in with the Watchman movie that is being made by the guy who made 300, is like doing that, but for Moby Dick. The whole meaning behind the story and the characters will be lost in an attempt to make an action movie.

    This, will, SUCK.

  13. Man Raised By Puffins says:

    Ooh, electric men and moodily lit hands-in-pockets action. I’m sold.

  14. Sp4rkR4t says:

    Welcome to the worst film cash-in game of 2009.

  15. roBurky says:

    I’m not sure what’s surprising here. This is what they said it would be in the first announcement.

  16. Funky Badger says:

    It’s not meant to be Game-of-the-Film-of-the-Story – as I understand it – but some, err, backlstory/filler about when Rorsarsch and Nite Owl were doing their vigilante thing before the wotsit act put paid to those shennanigans.

  17. Pags says:

    Sometimes all you can do is laugh.

  18. Radiant says:

    Super Smash Brothers Watchmen.

    I swear to god if Dr Manhattan disassembles my molecules one more time I’m throwing this joypad into the TV.

  19. jonfitt says:

    I have not read the comics, so to me this just looked like Batman and The Mysterious Stranger in a 3d Streets of Rage.

  20. Dizet Sma says:

    No, you see it’s a multiple layered game, you get to delve into the complexity and the meta story…

    Nah, it’s just gonna be crap, isn’t it?

  21. unwise says:

    I would play any Anna Karenina game, no matter how loosely associated, but I suspect that such a characteristic does not place me within a particularly significant demographic.

  22. Fenric says:

    No, no no…

  23. Cat Vincent says:

    ” turn Anna Karenina into a Railroad Tycoon clone.”
    Not Tycoon.
    A Call of Cthulhu game would do nicely.
    Followed by;
    Sense and Sensibility:Castlevania (the Golddiggers of 1820 meet the Alucard family while seeking marriage prospects…)

  24. Leeks! says:

    Along with Dante, this will be the year of the hilariously inappropriate game adaptations.

  25. A-Scale says:

    Nice Anna Karenina reference!

  26. manintheshack says:

    Ah, gaming, you never fail to deeply upset. Moving from the year of the sequels into the year of the adaptations. I can’t tell which is more depressing…

  27. Pags says:

    What other inappropriate game adaptions would you like to see RPS? I’d quite like to see an FPSRPG based on I’m Sorry I Haven’t A Clue; BBC radio is a vast, untapped source of inspiration.

  28. Saflo says:

    Brideshead Revisited: Game of the Year Edition

  29. Mark says:

    shouldn’t the Watchmen game be like.. an adventure game or something, not a beat-em up?

  30. houseinrlyeh says:

    Hamlet: The Return of the Prince.
    Featuring Hamlet and his exploding throwing skulls of course.

  31. Tei says:

    If you buy a game, based on a novel, and is nothing like the novel. Can you get your money back?.
    What is lost in traslation here? the ambient,.. and.. is really lost? what more is lost in translation? the point of the novel? the points is like a historic pesimist (read the Ozymandias poem). So.. what? …

  32. Colthor says:

    A turn-based strategy game based on any Dick Francis novel.

  33. manintheshack says:

    ‘shouldn’t the Watchmen game be like.. an adventure game or something, not a beat-em up?’

    Everybody knows adventure games aren’t down with the kids.

    What other inappropriate game adaptions would you like to see RPS?

    I’d like to see Once Upon a Time in the West as a slapstick rail shooter on the Wii. Instead of the Bronson/Fonda duel at the end, you compete to see who can play keepy uppy with a coke can longest…

  34. Matt says:

    ‘Waking from nightmare, I found myself upon a dismal beach-head, amongst dead men and the pieces of dead men. Bosun Ridley lay nearby. Birds were eating his thoughts and memories. Reader take comfort from this: In Hell, at least the gulls are contented.’

    Above from the pirate comic in the Watchmen. I suppose that we should take comfort from the fact that people who like games like this will be contented.

  35. John Walker says:

    I want to see All Quiet On The Western Front as an FPS.

  36. Aftershock says:

    I swear to fucking god.
    The chick who says “World Premiere” is the same person that does the voice for the GDA alerts etc. in C&C3

  37. an ape says:

    The state of the gaming industry sometimes make me sad. This is one of those times.

  38. IdleHands says:

    Inappropriate game adaptions, eh?

    To Kill a Mocking Bird – Pheonix Wright style game
    Moby Dick – Fishing simulation
    Oedipus The King – a GTA game, climb your way to the throne (and into your mom’s panties)
    Picture of Dorian Gray – RPG quest to retrieve the painting
    Crime and Punishment – 3rd person beat ’em up. “You’ve been framed for a murder you didn’t commit escape prison and find who set you up”
    The Count Of Monte Cristo – FPS, find and get revenge on those who betrayed you
    Three Men in a Boat – Humorous point and click game

  39. Pags says:

    @Idle Hands: you mean we don’t play Raskolnikov in the Crime & Punishment game? Here was me visualising a GoW-style shoulder-shooter, with axe-murdering instead of chainsaw-guns.

  40. Psychopomp says:


    So, wait. A guy famous for doing EXTREMELY faithful movie adaptations of comics, going so far as to use the comic panels as storyboards, is the last guy you want doing the Watchmen movie?

    There are FAR worse choices, my friend.

  41. IdleHands says:

    Oh I like that idea better. I was trying to get into the mindset of a game developer that misses the point of the original source, i.e. changing the Raskolnikov character into a more likeable anti-hero character that delivers violent justice for the players to connect with.

    Like Uwe Boll

  42. Bhazor says:

    In all honesty I have to say they seem to have captured the difference in fighting styles. Nite Owl simulating all the wrestling and comic book moves whilst Rorschach just twats you with a crowbar and stamps on your head.

  43. Resin says:

    Metamorphosis as a platform side scroller
    The Yellow Wallpaper – a horror based RPG
    Raise High the Roof Beam Carpenters / Seymour an Introduction – a Glass family Simms
    Gravity’s Rainbow – WWII FPS with an RPG twist
    The Road – survival FPSRPG

  44. Jackus says:

    How can someone look at Watchmen and The Divine Comedy and think ‘Ah HAH! I spy a action videogame just BURSTING out of the pages’

    I’m guessing next we’ll get ‘A Brief History of Time’ on the Wii – where Stephen Hawking (in his younger years) fights his way to the centre of the universe.

    The final boss will be God.

  45. The Poisoned Sponge says:

    I dread to think what’ll happen if anyone does 1984 as a film… again. Or Brave New World. Everyone’s starting to love Dystopias, so it’s only a matter of time.

  46. Lord_Mordja says:

    You shut the hell up that would be amazing.

  47. Pidesco says:

    Of Mice and Men: The Fighting Game.

  48. john t says:

    To Kill a Mocking Bird – Pheonix Wright style game
    Inappropriate? That sounds awesome.

    My Contributions:
    Schindler’s List: The RTS
    Thomas Covenant: the MMORPG..

  49. john t says:

    Gravity’s Rainbow: The FPS
    Infinite Jest: The Graphic Adventure
    House of Leaves: Survival Horror

  50. Gap Gen says:

    To be honest, a Rorschach murder-em-up was probably the best thing they could have done with the license. But like the article says, there’s no reason to do a game of the film of the comic. Hell, there’s no reason to do a film of the comic other than to wring money from people.