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New Wave: Bioshock 2 Teaser Site

Aw. Cute.

Well, either that, or Little Big Planet is taking a really grim direction for a sequel. I wake up to a mass of mails from this – FinalSin was first, but cheers to you all – which shows how much even a sliver of information on Bioshock 2 excites people. I suspect we’re reaching the point when a lot more is going to be forthcoming soon. But while we wait, we’ve got some clues on this teaser site to pick over. It’s a map, with a series of faux-press clippings pinned to it and a mark on the West of Ireland. Presumably, we’re going to get more marks and more evidence as the month goes by. But what to make of it all?

The west of Ireland position suggests to me that we’re going to get more of these in a vague circle around wherever they’re going to be having their new city – a quasi Atlantis in the middle of the Atlantic would be my bet. The doll is clearly inspired by a Big Daddy. The newspaper clipping tells of a little girl being kidnapped at night by someone able to run at unnatural speed even though carrying a seven year old. He was “thin above average height and wore some kind of ‘Red light'” which appeared to be coming from his head. While police think he was wearing a miner’s helmet, I suspect there’s another explanation. The note from the beach-comber is linking the first two pieces of evidence together – that the toy was found on the beach previously, and it seems to resemble the kidnapper a little. After all, it appears to be a helmet and they could be boots and… well, J.Lynch is dismissed as a nut in red ink by whomever received the mail. Two other minor things there – it starts with “Intrigued by your speculation re: connection betw: footprints + kidnapping”. In other words, whoever received the letter has been doing some speculation of their own. I suspect it’s whoever’s maintaining the actual map itself, and we’ll get their commentary again. Secondly, we have a date. March 18th 1967.


Oh God. We’re going down the rabbit hole now. They’ve got that poor little girl and…

Oh, in Ireland it was actually this:

Though Release Me went into Number 1 the week after – meaning what people were buying after the psychic fallout was actually old Humperdinck. Which could prove something, but probably doesn’t.

Anyway – what can we tell about it? Well, the immediate thought is a new Big Daddy… but the high-speed thing is already within the Big Daddy’s abilities. The only new feature is the fact he was described as “thin”. In terms of speculation, I think we’re heading into a “Big Daddy’s Without Kids, Go Forth To Get Them” sort of thing. But why? And where? And whom? And how? All will be revealed, unless they decide to end Bioshock 2 on a cliffhanger like bastards.

I also like the tiny elegant icon which is the sound on/off button.

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Kieron Gillen


Kieron Gillen is robo-crazy.

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