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Demolition Sim Demo Demolished

A typical Sunday morning in the Stone household: get up, shake fist at sky, consume breakfast of tea, toast and marmalade, go out and destroy a church. Thanks to the
Spreng- Und Abriss- Sim demo, I can now undertake that last activity without leaving the house!

Astragon, German purveyors of all things simmy and mundane, have followed thrill-shunning oddities like Dustcart Simulator 2008 and Forklift Simulator 2009 with a demolition sim featuring explosives and five types of masonry-mutilating plant. The bash-a-church trial only lets you fiddle with a couple of bulldozers and a JCB fitted with a pneumatic brick pummeller. To get your mitts on the dynamite and the wrecking ball dangler, you must pay.

Which I can’t see myself doing, unless there’s a MegaRealism patch in the offing. Like Digger Simulator,  Spreng- Und Abriss- Simulator appears to be an appealing idea undermined by flaky physics and crudely-modelled machines. I don’t know much about engineering or architecture but I do know that a churchtower missing several entire courses of bricks at its base is more likely to topple than hover. Fred Dibnah would be spinning in his grave.

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Tim Stone

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