New TF2 Update: That’s It, It’s WAR!

It's clearly about kissing.

And now the latest TF2 update has begun. This time it’s Demoman and Soldier, with the usual routine in place – we’ll see three weapons for each of them, new maps, new oddities, achievements, and probably some bloody hats, revealed over the coming week. We’ll be determined to wait a few days and put all the updates in one post, and Valve will do something ludicrous each day that forces us to report it anyway, and we’ll curse them and their cleverness. Their first trick: there’s a secret seventh weapon, and only one of the two classes is going to get it. If more Demomen kill Soldiers over the coming week, then Demoman gets the weapon, and vice versa, monitored via the WAR hub page.

This means each side in the fight is getting their own update page. You can follow the Soldier here, and the Demoman here.

So there’s still much speculation. The comic book build up to this moment raises questions. Was that simply a premise to justify a conflict between the two classes? Pretend they’d become friends in order to have a narrative reason to divide them over a desire for a seventh unknown weapon? That seems too weak. I suspect there might be more to this friendship business, especially with all the new Announcer lines that have been recorded, but not deployed.

Surely this is a new game mode? Something involving alliances that either side can violate first, to some interesting cost. Or the option to make a one-to-one friendship mid-game to gain some manner of advantage.

And there’s plenty more guessing to be done. What new weapons do you want/expect for either class. And what seventh weapon do you think might exist that’s useful (or not, of course) to both Soldier and Demoman?


  1. Vinraith says:

    Just to have this out there, right or wrong: I expect we’ll see an engineer “hijack” of this little conflict, so that Valve can knock out all three remaining class updates in one fell swoop. I mean, demo and solider are the two sentry-killer classes, how can the engineer NOT enter into this?

  2. Spectre-7 says:

    I’ve already heard some of those during gameplay. The “Friendship ends in 10 seconds,” clip played during warm-up, over the usual 10 second warning. I suspect some of the others have played, but I don’t recall them specifically.

    Oh, and… Go Demomen!

  3. sbs says:

    SAY IT! IT’S WAR link to

    • Garg says:

      A large cack of heavy cloud.

    • BooleanBob says:

      <3 Chris Morris.

    • Joseph says:

      That was hilarious, cheers :D

      This is very much a country.. that’s gonna blow up… in it’s face.

      THAT is Suzannah Geckaloise. “I’ll be reporting from *inside* the fight!” … Like some crazy trojan.

      Now.. if we rotate the throat circle… *cuts out*…. rofl.

  4. Vae Victus says:

    I was just playing TF2 and every server has been transformed into a hellish war zone. It is a little unbalanced at the moment but I, for one, welcome the change. I much prefer a team with 10 soldiers to a team with 10 snipers and spies standing around doing nothing. The quantity of explosives flying around is unreal.

  5. greenB says:

    1. I bet the friendship stuff is just some feature connected to Steam Friends – probably good for achievements, but no real impact on gameplay.
    2. The secret weapon better be melee, because if it’s something that actually matters, we’ll never hear the end of it. “OMG DEMO/SOLIDER IS OVARPOWRED NOW JUS BECOS MORE PPL PLAYD IT IN THAT WEEK” TF2 is a well-made and well-maintained game, but the community can be annoying.

  6. CMaster says:

    Thing is.
    I’m pretty sure that if I play demo, I’m helping the soldiers win. And vice versa. My stats bare out that I am not a good explosives character (and an even worse spy, but never mind that).

    • Plinglebob says:

      This is what will make it really interesting. Everyone not used to playing Soldier/Demoman will try playing as one to boost kill numbers, but will end up being slaughtered by those experienced at it. Should be an interesting week *grabs popcorn*

    • wyrmsine says:

      CMaster – I’m in a similar boat; I’d prefer the Demo to win, but I make a much better Solider to the point I’d just provide another victim by going Demo. Help everyone – be a Medic!

  7. kvertiber says:

    Seventh weapon? I´m thinking landmines.

    • Hmm-Hmm. says:

      Wouldn’t that be more of an engineer thing?

    • kvertiber says:

      Well, they are explosive. The engie could be made able to detect and defuse them. This would bring him closer to the main action, no longer a purely defensive player.

  8. Richeh says:

    I’ll throw my predicty hat in the ring and say we’ll be swamped with slaughterhouse servers killing demomen and soldiers on a factory line, or some variation thereof.

    • Christian says:

      Hmm…not achievement_idle but demomankill_idle and soldierkill_idle? Sounds fun, in a twisted sort of way..

  9. Premium User Badge

    phuzz says:

    I think a lot of opposing soldiers and demomen are going to get sniped if I have anything to do with it…

  10. Deerhoof says:

    I agree!

    The engineer can’t NOT be involved in this party.

  11. DJ Phantoon says:

    I wonder if people have already begun singling out Demomen or Soldiers in a crowd to run away from them since the enemies will be focused on em.

  12. Dante says:

    I think the friendship stuff will either play to confirm a soldier/demo kill, or for you killing your steam friends. I believe they said it wouldn’t be a new game mode.

  13. Rosti says:

    In the Grim Darkness of the Pit Full of Gravel, THERE IS ONLY CAKE. And war. Often war.

  14. Schaulustiger says:

    What makes me excited is the prospect of more cross-server action like this. Valve is on a good way to make TF2 more than just a clustered multiplayer shooter and I think I like it.

  15. alice says:

    I want the soldier to win so I spent most of the night play as demoman. In the end I had 11 soldier kills and 50 some demo deaths, mission accomplished!

  16. Jezebeau says:

    I’ve played for a couple hours since that went live, and I’ve decided to retire from the game for a week. It’s just monstrous amounts of sticky-grenade spam.

  17. patch says:

    Am I the only one who didn’t think that the Announcer in the comic looked anything like I imagined her to be?

  18. Deerhoof says:

    That’s pretty much exactly how I imagined her.

    A bit cruella deville

  19. subedii says:

    Valve are truly amazing when it comes to hype building on a two year old game.

    How many other devs could or would keep the interest going this long?

  20. Jacques says:

    Meh, I want my Engineer update, also, no bloody dog.

  21. Genki says:

    I found a server that was only demomen vs soldiers and it was a lot of fun. I wish more would do this, so the servers that don’t want this can stay out of this very messy affair.

    • Deerhoof says:

      There’s something to be said for the ability to limit classes

  22. Deerhoof says:

    The Engineer will be updated too. Mark my words. This isn’t the end of these patch announcements

  23. Brulleks says:

    But…will we be able to kill demomen* on our own team? That would get really divisive : )

    Oooh, the temptation. The griefing. The hiding outside your own spawn with rocket launcher at the ready…

    Alas not though, I imagine.

    *There may be an element of bias in my posts for the duration of the next week. Maggots.

  24. RyePunk says:

    The allegiance thing is hopefully a method to address team stacking on servers. Because being stomped into the dirt with no hope of winning isn’t a whole lot of fun, well I suppose that depends on your perspective, eventually all that winning must get tiring though.

  25. Garu says:

    Every one of you soldier supporting bastards needs a good blowing up. All glory to the demomen!

  26. Jacques says:

    My spade, your face. Filthy Demoman.

  27. Saul says:

    Interesting that they picked the two classes that can explode themselves. Suicide servers, anyone?

    • Neut says:

      “The more Demomen you kill as the Soldier class will help ensure the Soldier gets the weapon at the end of the week. The more Soldiers you kill as the Demo will help the Demo class get the exclusive seventh weapon.”

      Looks like suicides won’t count, only kills by enemy demos/solly depending on whether you’re playing solly or demo.

  28. monchberter says:

    I won’t be dropping my dedicated Pyro stance anytime soon. A reflect rocket / grenade / sticky, or even arrow and flare kill is the highlight of my game. Not to mention reflect Jarate!!!!!

  29. JuJuCam says:

    I honestly think the friendship business is a simple framing story for the patch delivery. Saxton Hale has to invent new and interesting ways for the two classes to kill each other to break them up. Because if they discuss what their shared knowledge (ie. the identity of the announcer) it could spell the end of the vicious game the announcer and co. produces.

    Of course this does not preclude some sort of L4D style episodic team co-op game vs announcer corp. down the line some time…

  30. Skinlo says:

    I hope soldier win, I hate playing against demomen soo much!

  31. Gnarl says:

    The clever will play medic, and heal the one you want to win.

  32. gulag says:

    Suffer not the Demoman to live!! Abide not his bombs to rest upon your stoop!! Take up your shovels, gird on your Bazookas! Rack your trusty shotguns, and make WAR upon the Scottish Cyclops!!!!

  33. david gentle says:

    Better, headline:
    WAR! Never been so much fun!

    • Pod says:

      Never been so much fun?
      GO to your brother
      KILL him with your gun
      Leave him lying in his uniform
      Dying in the sun


      KI KI KILL ‘IM
      KILL him with your gun
      KILL him with your gun
      KILL him with your gun

      KILL him with your gun
      KILL him with your gun
      KILL him with your gun

    • ThePinkNinja says:


  34. tim7168 says:

    And why the hell are they releasing updates for TF2 and not L4D2? Hmmm? THE FUCKING LIARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  35. TheSombreroKid says:

    these are my 2 favorite classes so it’s a tough call, right now i’m leaning towards the demoman, i play him most, but i kinda don’t want him spoiled with a lack of focus.

  36. mcnubbins says:

    That’s pretty smart. Think I’ll do that. Although my initial plan upon hearing this was to play Soldier and get killed by Demos on purpose (’cause Demodude is my favourite class). But your suggestion sounds more fair.

  37. Kieron Gillen says:

    This totally made me want to boot up TF2 immediately. So Job done. DOWN WITH DEMOMEN.


    • BooleanBob says:

      Not just down, but backwards, upwards, outwards with the demo scum! Like Wonker’s Great Glass Elevator, we must have demomen moving in all possible directions simultaneously! An exciting fountain of gibs!

  38. TheSombreroKid says:

    it’s interesting that the soldier say, he doesn’t even know if he wants it, could it be something negative or completely useless, that’d be pretty funny.

  39. TheSombreroKid says:

    @Gnarl, you’re going to seem like a bit of a dick not healing soldiers or demomen on your team.

  40. Christian says:

    Backing of some of the other statements here:

    It really is amazing how Valve manage to make me excited over each update they do, it’s a bit like waiting for christmas as a kid. I hope they keep this up, it’s nice to have something to look forward to and be excited about.

    Also, each new update delivers new players, so for some time after the update, the servers are full of new and unexperienced players. That’s always fun.

    • ouch. says:

      Oh my god. You’ve just made me realise that I’m vastly more excited about this update than I am about Christmas.

      What.. what happened to my innocence?

  41. Malagate says:

    Demoman all the way, I’d go for black scottish cyclops any day over General Patton.
    I just really want the 7th weapon to be an eye-laser that’s hidden under his eyepatch, frankly there’s nothing I can imagine for the Solider that would be anywhere near as cool as that. I had my deadly laser-eye on you the whole time!

  42. negativedge says:

    god, Valve are a bunch of geniuses. meta games! this is like when people created the zombie mode in Halo 2, only instead of people it was Valve, who are not people but instead game designing robots. it’s a new mode without a mode, a way to get players to test something they want to be tested, something to spice up a 3 year old game from the outside rather than from within, and a way to get people outside of their comfort zone. plus it has real consequences and plays on the human penchant for tribalization. I am quite impressed. and aroused.

  43. RLacey says:

    It’s times like this make me want to cry. My mouse died this week, and getting the manufacturers to replace it is taking longer than I’d like. I want to help the Soldiers lose!

  44. CMaster says:

    So, meet the Medic with this update or not do we think?
    Either way, I’m not sure how it could be as funny as soldier/sniper or as awesome as spy. Though it could at least aspire to being better than Meet the Demoman.

  45. jamsarnie says:

    Oh dear; sorry every other game I own and should play (recently bought in Steam sale L4D, I’m looking at you), but I’ll be occupied for the foreseeable future playing TF2…again…

    I do hope the Engie sneaks in to this update too though. He needs some variation. Maybe a short range Flame Turret with automatic compression blast technology to keep the pesky sticky bombs and rockets away. In tandem with an Engie building a normal rocket turret, should be quite effective. Some sort of mine detection, if one of the new weapons is a mine layer would work too…

    • CMaster says:

      Me thinks that engies don’t need ways to make forts more impenetrable. Remember that unlocks are meant to encourage new styles of play, not make them stronger at what they do.
      Something that makes engies better used more offensivley sounds more useful.

  46. sfury says:

    Rocket-Launching FOR THE WIN !!!

    See you lads tonight.

  47. Gut says:

    I’d like to see a sort of riff on survival mode, with both teams fighting together and trying to sabotage the other team at the same time. Say four point started out with 2 under each teams control, all capturable with a team controlling no points losing. A 3rd bot team locks the points if it captures them and gets more powerful over time and each time a point flips colour. How long can you last, do you help the bots taking enemy points or do you help the filthy BLUs so you can grab the point for the glory of RED. Just spitballing, but that sounds pretty fun to me.

    Also, GUTS AND GLORY!!!

  48. TheSombreroKid says:

    i think the enginear will get a decloak tower instead of a sentry in his update.

  49. IIshin says:

    It’s very interesting to see how the gamer population works. Within 10 minutes of me hearing about the tf2 update, I immediately put a [Soldier] tag next to my name, and I was surprised at how many people had already taken a side. Even if you aren’t on a side, you pretty much have picked a side by rolling and killing anything else. You would enter any server, and they’d be soldiers and demos. Once the current round ended, all I had to do was to make a humble suggestion “How ’bout sollys go on RED and demos go on BLU”, and voila, no snide remarks or anything, and it was Team Soldier vs Team Demo. Of course, once I had all the soldiers on one side, I switched to medic with a kritzkreig. :)

    But I can imagine clans breaking up temporarily because they can’t decide which class deserves a weapon more and stuff. Meta-game FTW indeed. :)

  50. Bhazor says:

    But will Soldiers really stand a chance here? I mean any decent demo tends to hide and fire around corners or just use minefields. A soldier needs a clear target and a demo just don’t work like that.

    I’d say scout versus soldier would be closer or soldier versus engie/turrets.