Make Room For Doom! (Clever, I Know.)

I know I’m always banging on about some obscure piece of Russian software, but mark my words: the next big thing in PC gaming will come out of the United States. Sounds like I am saying lies? Well screw you. I mean it.

Some of you might have seen the precursor to the revolution already. It’s a game called “Wolfenstein” in which, unusually for a videogame, you fight Nazis. Rather like Dungeon Master, Wolfenstein was set in a first-person perspective, but it’s actually fully 3D engine in which you can shoot your enemies in real-time. We anticipate that the sequel, Doom, will inspire an entire generation of these “real-time shooters”.

Doom is being made by a little-known studio of amateurish enthusiasts in Dallas, Texas, called Id Software. The plan this gang of angry poindexters are touting is to distribute a limited version of the game freely over the world wide web to generate interest. Obviously we can’t see that idea working for them, because clearly it will require magazine coverdiscs to actually reach its intended audience. Real-time shooters will also demand a very high spec PC to run correctly, due to the use of clever pixel-painting tech called “textures”. They’ll have to work hard to prove that you need to step up from your trusty 386! And I think they’re going to find themselves rapidly outclassed by another technology of the future: the voxel.

Anyway, we’ve been lucky enough to get our hands on a version of the game, and we can attest that it looks exactly like real life. Characters in the game world are so detailed that they almost behave almost exactly like real people. You’ll be looking at the screen and saying, “Good day, fine sir,” because you’ll think you’ve met a man in the street, but NO: HE IS A ZOMBIE.

There’s no hi-score table.

But anyway: those graphics! You can actually see the blood fly off the enemy zombies like painful red water as you shoot them! With flashing lights and groaning “doors”, you’ll almost think you are there. It’s so realistic, in fact, that we’re concerned about the effects it might have on younger players. Could it potentially “mind-bomb” them? Mind-bombing is something that experts are worried about, because it’s the psychologically real process of having your mind replaced with that of a murderer. If games can do that, then we are all going to have to go to prison.

However, assuming we are not “mind-bombed” by the technology from Texas, I think it’s clear that we’re entering a new age of excellence and innovation. What’s most exciting about Doom is that it points the way to a whole new mode of experiencing games: real-time shooters will just be the first step on a ladder to a new moon of simulation. This giant leap to 3D environments and first-person perspective opens up possibilities for games being more than about simply shooting things. Thanks to real-time personal graphics you’ll be able to explore, interact with artificial intelligences, and perhaps even live a virtual existence in a high sophisticated simulated laser universe! One day, in a game like Doom, we will be able to talk to the monsters.

Now won’t that be something?


  1. robrob says:

    Ban this sick filth.

    • Bhazor says:

      Down with this sort of thing!
      (Careful now)

    • Arathain says:

      Mind how you go.

    • Brulleks says:


      Lol. I was going to type exactly that in the Sam and Max comments thread.

      Just watched that episode the other day in fact.

  2. Vadermath says:

    Got one word for this:


    • Zaphid says:

      While the point is sound, the style really doesn’t gel with the period. If you actually wrote that, there would be crowd with pitchforks hunting you down. I guess everyone who was gaming remembers that period as the time when everything was awesome, leaps in graphics occurred almost annually and ID were on the top of the world. Suggesting that their game is all about graphics while the gameplay is mediocre would be foolish.

    • PoulWrist says:

      Especially since Doom has the best fps gameplay of all time <3 still boot it up regularly.

  3. HermitUK says:

    Wow, this new fangled 3D tech is most certainly the future!

    I can’t wait to see how platform games and point and click adventures make use of this technology.

    • NateN says:

      There is something funny about this 3D. I noticed that I can’t run off a ledge if there is a monster directly in front of me, but 30 feet down. It’s really hard to tell if the monster is far down below you, since you can’t seem to look anywhere but straight ahead at directly 90 degrees to the ground.

      I’ve only played the shareware episode, maybe they fixed it in the full version?

  4. Shodan says:

    I think I might have been mind bombed after killing hitler in his robo-suit in Wolfenstein.

  5. Kieron Gillen says:

    I wish I could talk to the monsters :(


    • Okami says:

      What would you say to them?

    • Spoon says:

      No, Kieron. You ARE the monsters!

    • stahlwerk says:

      Maybe “google”* can help?

      *) note: i don’t actually know what a google is.

    • Chaz says:

      Everybody sing along now….

      If we could talk to the monsters, learn all their languages,
      Maybe take a monster degree,
      I’d study imp and cacodemon, revenant and cyberdemon,
      Mancubus, spectre, and zombie!

    • Lewis says:

      Dammit Kieron, I was just about to do that one.

    • Wulf says:

      *sings along!*

      Besides, you never know, perhaps previous incursions into their reality pissed them off! Humans are destructive, maybe they just want recompense, but we don’t bother to talk to them so we’ll never know!

      I want a game where we talk to these monsters, but that’ll never happen. Sadly, the world thinks monsters are for killing.

      It’s a shame, I’d love a game where I could play as a werewolf in a wide, open, 3D world, with sparkly graphics as nice as Doom’s, or even nicer! But that’s never going to happen…

    • Metonymy says:

      What’s most troubling about this piece is that we still haven’t improved on this game. Quake added half self-damage and slow movement, half-life replaced exploration with “narrative corridors,” various console abominations added chasecam, bad controls, and horribly lowered expectations, and finally calladuty removed the health bar, enemy variety, and most weapons.

      This was not the flower of life that blossomed into an eden of gaming, it was the momentary spark of light that has entropically decayed into a nondescript dust cloud.

  6. DrazharLn says:

    This reminds me of the tech-quotes from Galactic Civilizations 2.

  7. Britpunk says:

    My mate made a copy and gave me a floppy with this on. He says its aint illegal cause its shareware (whatever the hell that means…). I dunno tho. doesn’t seem right to me.

  8. AbyssUK says:

    I’ve just started playing Blake Stone, this can’t be as good as that!

  9. Mary_Dayhouse says:

    OH YES. Let us teach our children how to MURDER and KILL with these realistic simulations of being an ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT (as it is set on Mars’ moon).

    If someone goes out on a murdering spree, after playing one of these games, it is clear that the game itself caused that killing spree to happen. there can be NO OTHER EXPLANATION.

  10. Crusoe says:

    This has been one of my fave RPS days, ever :D

    • sephiroth says:

      Best RPS day ever
      so good it made me register allthough that might actually make it less good for some of you when you get to know me I dunno

  11. Amqz says:

    3D, eh? I’tll never catch on.

  12. JoeDuck says:

    Hmmm… It reminds me of a mix between Battlezone and Gauntlet.
    However, this game is too violent, the kids will be too scared to play it.

  13. battles_atlas says:

    I know you RPS guys do this website in your spare time between pickpocketing gentlemen on the Strand, and sweeping chimeneys, but your delay in covering games is unacceptable. I had Bad Company for 2 weeks before you reviewed it, and I got Doom 16 years ago.

  14. G Manning says:

    An excess of satanic imagery. I wouldn’t be surprised if these Id fellows are actually Satan worshipers. Should we really allow this hyper-realistic satanic violence simulator to get into the hands of our children? Our CHILDREN?!?!

  15. Taillefer says:

    Doom, but on the PC?

  16. Colthor says:

    I dunno, it sounds like a bit of a step backwards from Ultima Underworld to me.

  17. Blandford says:

    Doom is for casuals.

  18. Wolfman says:

    If we are not careful I could imagine this game will spawn a satanic cult encouraging suicide pacts!

  19. Alaric says:

    It has pentagrams in it! You hear me? PENTAGRAMS!

    This game is made by an evil Satanic cult, and its purpose is to turn children into Devil-worshipers!

    How dare you, advertise it, heathens? Rossignol, you shall burn in hell for this!

    Will somebody, please, PLEASE, think of the children!!!

  20. Pod says:

    >One day, in a game like Doom, we will be able to talk to the monsters.

    That’s two AP references in one day!

  21. TheSombreroKid says:

    i’m only going to play the shareware version.

  22. Grubblik says:

    Does this mean I’ll have to upgrade my hercules graphics card?

  23. Dave says:

    This will never be as big as Wolfenstein 3D.

  24. Michael says:

    So it’s basically just a shoot-em-up? I think I’ll stick with the many RPGs, adventure games, strategy games and multi-genre games that are so popular and widely available.

  25. Craymen Edge says:

    Isn’t April 1st hilarious?

  26. Mr Chug says:

    This ought to cause a Quake when it’s released. Looks Unreal. I’d happily spend Half my Life playing it but I’ve heard that could cause Golden Eye syndrome. It might mean saying Halo to a bit of a Battlefield of developers, but it’s a Far Cry to say it won’t take off.

    • Psychopomp says:

      I have never hated anyone more than I hate you right now. You ought to be ashamed of those puns!

    • august says:


    • Spiffy new comment system says:

      This isn’t worth causing Strife over but I will admit that this is quite the Shock to the System. All this is making me hungry for my favorite cereal, Chex, prehaps I will Quest for some.


    • Jad says:


      Man, just take a Painkiller and relax. No One Lives Forever, so there’s no use making this out to be a big Crysis.

      (man this is fun!)

    • Jad says:

      Also, there are some Dark Forces around in the gaming industry today trying to make the PC appear to be Left 4 Dead. We PC gamers need to band together as Brothers in Arms and stop this Descent into lies and F.E.A.R.

      (alright, I’ll stop now)

    • august says:

      Damn this is exhausting. Feels like I just ran a Marathon.

  27. Premium User Badge

    Hodge says:

    This game looks good, but what kind of system will you need to run the thing? It’s almost getting to the point where PCs will need dedicated expansion cards, just to render the graphics.

  28. Muzman says:

    Innovative perhaps, but it will rapidly be surpassed by the forthcoming Rise of the Triad. Id make their games too quickly; from Commander Keen to Spear of Destiny they are in a rush to throw out the latest graphics gimmicks over quality. Apogee, on the other hand, are taking the time to get the details right. A strategy that will serve them well going forward, long after Id have burned themselves out.

  29. drewski says:

    I hate to be a killjoy, but I’m pretty sure this “Doom” software only fakes 3D through judicious use of perspective, and is in face merely 2D.

    I think this is a good thing, I can’t see computers ever having enough power to really create a full 3D environment.

  30. golden_worm says:

    Man, that level of punning is truly beyond the call of duty. You deserve a medal of honour!

  31. mbp says:


    I predict that games will never be the same again. I really thought it was faked when I first saw those screen shots. The graphics are so realistic. I need to play this game NOW!

    Unfortunately my dad won’t let me dial long distance to the states to download the shareware version. Anyone know of a local bulletin board that is hosting this?

  32. Fedarkyn says:

    Há, this “3D” games will have no appeal for the grand audience. Everyone likes to play board games and this will never changes…

    3D, hmpf!!!

  33. HumanTon says:

    Bah, Ultima Underworld is better–it has a tiny little superball you can throw around that has actual physics.

    I bet in a decade when everyone has a supercomputer, games will have superballs you can throw that are as big as your head!

  34. Cinnamon says:

    This sort of mindless arcade game will set back computer games by ten years if it catches on with the plebeians. Utlima Underworld was already a terrible dumbing down of a once great franchise but this “Doom” game makes it look like a game for thinking people. Imagine that!

  35. Axman says:

    You sir, are imprecise with your predictions.

  36. karthik says:

    I heard there’s this game called System Shock that’s better than Doom. Should be out soon.

  37. geldonyetich says:

    My God, I hear this game actually takes place in Hell. And Mars. I don’t know which is worse. The blasphemy of the first or the infeasibility of the second. I’m going to stick to the Ultima games, where they’re safely 2D without having to worry about any of this Underworld business.

  38. Bret says:

    Man, you PC users (PC is short for Pretty Crappy LOLOLO) are DUMB!

    Ever heard of “Pathways into Darkness” dumbass? It’s what the REAL gamers on Mac play. It had zombies first!

    And it does let you talk to the ghost nazis! You doom-MORONS are totally behind the times.

    Mac will be the platform for all TRUE gamers by December, just watch!

    • BeamSplashX says:

      apples r 4 eating, not gaming! the only ppl that r dummer r amiga fanboys cuz amigas r the only “girl friend” they get! LOL.*

      *It hurts me so to type such awful grammar. We all give up a little bit of ourselves on April 1st, I guess.

    • Bret says:


  39. Toyoch says:

    Eh, its probably another lousy NES port..

  40. Snickersnack says:

    I F.E.A.R the Dark Forces of your SiN. I will not forgive your trespasses, oh Trespasser!

  41. Eli Bingham says:

    There wouldn’t be this incessant “DOOM” mania if id Software had given their game an unwieldy name like Smashing Pumpkins Into Small Piles Of Putrid Debris…

  42. Axman says:

    Here is my complete counter-point: link to

  43. dogsolitude_uk says:

    Yeah, right. The PC will never take off as a gaming platform.

    Firstly, who can afford a 100Mhz 486? Or a Pentium for that matter? There’s no dedicated graphics capability on the machine, and you have to spend hours configuring the RAM to get anything to work.

    You don’t even have proper sound on the PC either, just this stupid little buzzer unless you spend £50 on a weird add-on made by someone else.

    Seriously, the Amiga and ST are the way forward, if only because you can plug them into the TV. Plus they’ve got decent WIMP environments like Workbench and GEM. Windows is crap and a complete rip off, and can’t run more than one thing at a time.

    The PC is a complete mess and can’t hope to compete. You see that pile of junk in the loft in 17 years time? That’s your PC that is.

  44. Davie says:

    Well, it seems interesting enough, but has anyone heard about that strategic tactical army battling game called, what was it, Concern and Compensate? That looks like fun. I think I got the name wrong, though. I’ll have to check that webernet page again, but my phone cables appear to be overheating. Hopefully immersing them in ice will help…

  45. Ian says:

    Those lifelike graphics made be think there was an actual monster and now my screen has a crack down the middle where I smacked it with a cricket bat.

    You could have warned us. Fuck you, Rossignol.

  46. Hippo says:

    This is no match for the games I have on my Amiga.

  47. DeepSleeper says:

    Hey guys! Guys! Come over and play Marathon! It’s like this but it’s got reading and…

    Guys, really! It’s all aliens and space stations and guns! It’s 3D just like this!


    No, it’s on my Mac!

    Aw geez, guys, stop laughing!

    • Bret says:

      Marathon? What are you talking about?

      I’m sure I would have heard of such a game!

      (Pal, it ain’t out until next year. I know, I know. Saw the W’rkncacnter, popped back a ways. Happens to the best of us. But if you’re going to try to do something with a second chance, best not to tip our hands early, right?)

    • DeepSleeper says:

      (I could’ve sworn there was a DEMO at this point! Alas. Sit and wait, sit and wait…)

  48. GameOverMan says:

    This is doomed (no pun intended), a game about shooting people and/or monsters, in the face, will never be a success on the PC, the land of point & click adventure games and flight simulators. And don’t get me started with the absurd idea of some guys shooting at each other (in the face) on a networked game.

  49. Drakkheim says:

    My brother snuck into the office and downloaded the floppies from the local Apogee BBS. They’ve got something called ISDN which is like a super modem or something. It only took an hour to download all THREE floppies!

    We’ve just spent the last two hours playing it and it’s AMAZING! But be CAREFUL the environment things liek barrels actually do stuff! They blowed us up the first time we hit one with the CHAINSAW! YEAH! CHAINSAW!
    I’m gonna have nightmares tonight