Happy Burning Things Night, Burners

Ooh aah eee

Guy Fawkes: the last man to enter Parliament with honest intentions. (As someone said on Twitter earlier, but I’ve already lost who it was. Sorry, that person). Let us celebrate/flagellate the man who tried to take down British government, either by setting fire to things and making sky-flowers, or by creating virtual sky-flowers.

Embedded below is a fireworks simulator for you to dick about with. I found it via typing “fireworks games” into Google, so cannot vouch for its origin, age or truthiness. It’s also more a tech-experiment than a game, as such. I can vouch for it being a surprisingly scientific recreation of creating explosions in the night sky, however.

I don’t care if you tell me off for posting this. Fireworks! Yaaaaays!

Your screenshots. Show them to us.


  1. Rich says:

    “Guy Fawkes: the last man to enter Parliament with honest intentions.”
    Consider this plagiarised.

  2. Bascule42 says:

    ooohhhh…aaahhhhh…it’s Missile Command

  3. Unaco says:

    Honest intentions he may have had… but let’s not forget what those intentions where: Install a Catholic Theocracy and put an end to Protestant rule.

  4. SquareWheel says:

    That quotes been around for years, the person on Twitter ripped it off someone else.

  5. mandrill says:

    In other words he was just as guilty of religious bigotry as those he sought to explode, How the world changes… oh wair.

    • Haplo says:

      Indeed, how the world changes.


      It is like a yardstick of CHANGE.

  6. OJ287 says:

    Mel Gibson was born to make a film about Guy Fawkes.

  7. _Nocturnal says:

    On the topic of fireworks: In a better world, a world with proper Nintendo DS coverage, more people would have heard of Big Bang Mini.

  8. Malawi Frontier Guard says:

    Posting a fireworks simulator as a news item on a PC gaming website is highly unprofessional. It’s offensive to me. My parents were killed in a freak accident involving both fireworks and a simulator.

    And I thought this was decent website.

    • Starky says:

      My parents were killed because of someone complaining that something was offensive to them – I am there for offended at what you said.

      And I’ve now offended myself…

  9. clive dunn says:

    I was at a party a few years ago which culminated in a fireworks display. Throughout the whole thing i felt the need to shout, “woooo, there goes £50 up in smoke, woooo, another £20, wowwww, £100”.
    I was told later that the organiser of the party was standing right behind me.
    Idiot must of pissed away a few grand that night and i was glad to spoil the whole thing for him.

    I know people love fireworks but…

    they scare animals
    they scare my kids (they are young)
    they cost a fortune

    I am all for fireworks simulators like this if it keeps these explosives(!) off the streets.

    Grumpy old man

    (for captcha fans, i got ‘wanX’

    • Beerio says:

      Wow, you really are a miserable sod aren’t you? If you hate fireworks that much, how about not going to Fireworks parties just to moan about the fireworks.

      It’s like me going to Baseball games and spending the whole time moaning about how boring a game it is (note: I do this quite often).

    • Alaric says:

      Have you, sir, nothing better to do than counting other people’s money? If your little children are afraid of fireworks, perhaps you should entertain the idea of actually doing some parenting and possibly even not taking them to events that feature fireworks.

      As to the “keep[ing] these explosives off the streets” part, I cannot help but to feel for you. I certainly wouldn’t want to be in your shoes, living in the deadly streets ripe with grave dangers such as fast food, video games, gay people, and, worst of all, fireworks.

    • Theblazeuk says:

      There is certainly an idiot in that story.

    • D says:

      I agree with clive dunn. Fireworks are just another thing we pointlessly waste our lives enjoying. I don’t even look up at them anymore, cause I heard cool guys don’t do that.

    • Starky says:

      Yeah. enjoying things is so stupid and uncool.

      You’re very right that it is totally uncool to look at explosions.

    • Napalm Sushi says:

      “…it is totally uncool to look at explosions.”

      If the heroes and villains of action movies have had one unified message for civilisation, this would be it.

    • Bob Bobson says:

      While I’m all for both explosions and fire the “keep explosives off the street” line has some validity. I’ve been to places where 10-15 year olds throw lit fireworks at each other for kicks and it’s not awesome. Especially when it happens in daylight so you don;’t get to enjoy the pretty. But fireworks simulators are no replacement for fireworks parties.

  10. OctaneHugo says:

    I turned everything up to 100 (the simulator equivalent of 11) and it crashed my browser. What’s wrong, Fireworks Simulator 2000, too extreme for you?

    • Corrupt_Tiki says:

      hehe, me too, charge, thrust, explosive force and fuel all the way up, and a big flash and flame effect selected..

      And it just shot out of the screen and into orbit [presumably] ICBM anyone?

  11. dethgar says:

    I’m a guilty american that only knows of Fawkes due to V for Vendetta. I much like the idea of V over Fawkes though. Perhaps November 5th can be V-Day across the world, we all join hands, sing songs, and blow shit the fuck up!