The Longest Day: 24 Hours In White Gold

White Gold: War In Paradise, aka Xenus 2, aka Boiling Point 2 is the free-roaming FPS-RPG we’ve been meaning to take a closer look at for ages. A sequel to the famously mad, broken and ambitious Boiling Point (of which even the patch notes are comedy gold) from original Kiev-based developers Deep Shadows! What could be more exciting? What, indeed. An account of my first in-game day follows. It is a tale of daring-do, heavy drinking, a snake, a beautiful car and an enema.

The pre-rendered cutscene that White Gold opens with does a good job of setting the tone for the whole game. It opens on a packed club, where we see a fat, white hip-hop star sat in a private booth. Flanked by two girls who look like they’ve had collagen injections in not just their lips but their entire faces, said hip-hop star leans down to do a line of coke that’s on the table and dies immediately.

Cut to a ratty apartment where a man dressed in camo opens a door to a man in a suit. In an exchange that is entirely inpenetrable despite being in English (putting me in mind of this video) the man in camo is implied to be “the best”, photos are exchanged, and the man agrees to head to a place to take on some kind of mission. At this point I’ve already contracted a powerful case of “Boiling Point Face”, which is where your real-life mouth hangs open and your lower jaw is slightly retracted in a sort of gross awe.

It’s only by having a look online that I discover the message this scene is meant to import- your mission is to trace the source of the dangerous new cocaine being imported into Western countries the world over and put a stop to it.

Next up, the player gets control and we get the game’s introductory action sequence. I’ll just let this speak for itself. Notice the lead character’s voice. Slight error in casting there.

“Granvpa! Where a u going?” indeed.

So you’re left washed up on the shores of an island, but it’s not even the right island. A look at the map tells me that the game world is a sprawling archipelago, and my objective is several islands away. The map also tells me that I am in the South American nation of “Covumbia”. Thanks, map. I decide to ask the men on the dock a few questions and see what’s what.

The men on the dock are also the worst men. The above fisherman talks to me about fish for about a dozen text boxes with no purpose or message at the end. Next to him is a young man who the game tells me is “Footballer”, who is cheery despite there being no football or football paraphenalia in sight. Through various questions I learn that there are all sorts of nonspecific factions on the island, from the Army, to Bandits, to Paramilitaries and other groups that fall out of my head immediately because I find the perk screen.

Yeah! One of the new features in White Gold are all these perks you can buy using experience earned from missions. The images are a touch vague and the improvements are mostly uninteresting, but it’s still a nice idea. Look at this guy!

I’ll be getting that first, obviously. Nevermind what it does.

From here I mosey on into town and am fairly impressed by the range of people and things I can buy. I talk to a guy about the state of the government and buy a cookie. I talk to someone else about the argument he’s having with his friend and buy a dried fish. I talk to a woman about how the town is being pressured by the bandits and as I am walking away and figuring out the controls of the game my revolver goes off. I am a bad tourist. I buy a passion fruit.

The weird thing is, ever since I got to the village the voice acting of everybody I talk to cuts out a tiny way into their text, as if they were going to tell me about how their day went or whatever and then immediately think better of it. Is there something on my face? I quit the game and discover that this is an issue with the English version of the game. Half an hour and one gigabyte’s worth of Russian voices pulled off the internet later, I’m back in action.

A fat man who may or may not be my contact back at HQ starts yelling in my earpiece. There’s some contact or other I am to meet in a house at the top of a nearby hill. I get there and come under fire from men in suits. What?! Jerks!

Having committed four seperate and righteous acts of self defence I immediately set about raiding the pockets of the dead men, and also the cupboards of the house, where my contact is to be found after all, protesting his innocence. It’s been a long time since I’ve played a game and had quite this loose of a grip on the plot, but I sure did take excellent notes about what I had in my pockets following all this item collection. Deep Shadows did not skimp on the incidental collectibles.

I head back to town, killing a snake on the way and putting it in my pocket. On hearing that some threatening banditos have been hanging out on the beach, I go down, kill them and take their stuff too.

By this point I am carrying a shotgun, an AK47, a knife, two grenades, two uzis, THREE revolvers, an orange, a passion fruit, a pawpaw, a banana, a grapefruit, a pineapple, some coca leaves, some cocaine, absinthe, tequila, beer, rum, vodka, a syringe, an indian relic, two eggs, playing cards, cigarettes, a casette tape, an enema, an energy drink, some beads, a dead snake, some cookies, some flowers, a coconut and a parachute, a tin of spam, some loose prawns, a lighter and two packets of condoms.

Be Prepared! That’s the boy scout motto, isn’t it? I guess the boy scouts wouldn’t let me in, what with the booze, drugs, guns and the enema and all. I should probably get rid of some of this stuff.

By sunset I’ve been advised that I should find myself a ride, and on cue I hear that some paramilitaries about a hundred metres from where I shot and killed the bandits are holed up with some guy’s car. Score! I go hopping down to the beach, open fire and am immediately shot and killed.

That didn’t go so well. I try again, stealthily picking my way through the darkness and undergrowth, killing man after man after man via White Gold’s dreary yet brutal FPS mechanics. Having gotten shot several times, I end up squatting in a bush and eating great handfuls of prawns to recover my health. Finally, I reach her! My prize!

She’s so beautiful! A rebel colonel intercepts me on my way out of town. The rebels want to work with me. Well, who wouldn’t? I eat a banana. Alright, I say. What do you need me to do?

What the rebels want me to do is drive out to an army camp and steal a generator. Nooo problem. I eat a pawpaw and head off, drinking the absinthe in the car. On the way the car takes Massive Damage as I drive straight through a firefight between bandits and the army, who both seem to dislike me. Those waterheads! Don’t they know how beautiful this car is? It’s one of a kind! It genuinely is! There are no other cars anywhere!

I approach the generator at dawn, which as every thief knows is the perfect time for thievery. Dawn, or night. One or the other. A helicopter flies high overhead, but I am a sneaky thief. Stupid helicopter.

White Sands’ aggro mechanics are such that everyone requires about a second of staring straight at you before they’ll attack, allowing me to perform the awesomely believable feat of trundling into their small camp, attaching the generator (mounted on a trailer) to my car and driving back out as if I worked there, with the first shots only being fired when I’m driving away at about 30mph. Later, suckers!

The army colonel is nonplussed at my incredible feat of daylight burglary. I consider shooting him and taking his stuff. He probably has something really awesome, like a bit of rope or a papaya or something. I resist. He tells me to go driving off to an even more heavily armed army base and blow up their power transformers. I say OK. Myself and the beautiful car drive off. I drink two beers and crash the car into a ditch. I reload my save. Myself and the beautiful car drive off. I drink two beers, plus the whiskey, narrowly skidding my way around the ditch. Ha! Who’s laughing now, ditch? I drink the rum.

BOOM! It takes a tedious 15 minutes but I kill everybody in the camp and set to work blowing up the transformers. They are not, disappointingly, robots in disguise. I am bored again and out of anything to drink. Looking around for more explosives, I find a surviving government man.

Boiling Point had this problem. This is the Army guy who hands out missions if you decide to join the Army faction, but they sit him down so you’ll always know where to find him and so that he doesn’t end a plot arc by accidentally getting killed. He is so incredibly docile that he hasn’t even moved when that bit of debry from my demolitions came flying in through the window and landed on his hands. Do I kill him? Of course not. He is noble in the face of death. I eat a pineapple.

The rebels reward me for my work by giving me a jeep, armed with a mounted gun that I can control remotely with my mind. I celebrate my new jeep by accidentally driving it into the sea. Well, you win some, you lose some. I eat some more prawns and take an enema.

I should probably sleep. Do you need to sleep in White Sand? I wander down the beach and encountered “Frightened Diver”. It’s ok, Frightened Diver. What’s got you so scared?

Frightened Diver informs me that him and his friends were out diving when an enormous undersea monster appeared, sending him swimming for the shore and his friend down into a network of underwater caves. Somebody has to save his friend! But first, I’ll need to find an oxygen tank. Frightened Diver informs me of an old man who might have one. I check my map. It’s on the other side of the island. In a torturously long journey I manage to drive my jeep out of the sea, get to the tank, nearly kill the old man just on principle, eat a grapefruit and drive all the way back. This takes more than 15 minutes.

RIGHT. Here we go.

This is where I find out that the oxygen tank is a story item, not an equippable item, and can only be given to the lost diver. I am expected to just hold my breath. Several of the game’s perks improve your ability to hold your breath. I have none of them, but there can be no turning back now. I eat a cookie and chase it with an energy drink. Let’s do this!

It takes some 3 or 4 minutes of me swimming in a straight line to get to the point on my radar where the caves should be. I swim down. I find a cave! I don’t find the diver. I drown.

And that was the end of my first 24 hours in White Gold. It’s a less inspiring game than Boiling Point with an awful lot more downtime, but it certainly does have its moments. I might just do 48 Hours In White Gold. We’ll see.

[Jim’s note:White Gold is on Gamersgate.]


  1. Megadyptes says:

    I demand the next 24 hours! I recall playing a bit of Boiling Point 1, it ran pretty crappy on my old PC but I still had some fun with it. One time I drove from the starting town to the other side of the map in the crappy starting car you get.

    Half an hour or so later I arrived in town and headed straight for the bar, had a few drinks, got drunk, managed to crash my car and get it lodged somehow in an inescapable bit of terrain. After ten minutes of trying to get it out I returned to the bar in a drunken rage and started a fight.

    The next day I woke up in hospital in the starting town, half my items were gone and my car was still on the other side of the map. It was beautiful.

    • Martha Stuart says:

      in the Change log it says: “characters move when hooting”

      LOL, i have to play this game just for that one line!!!!!!

  2. CMaster says:

    Interesting to see such horribly bad voice acting, considering that Boiling Points was well, OK.
    It’s also worth pointing out that after 4 huge patches, Boiling Point is actually quite playable and interesting. Not to say it isn’t buggy, but it’s no longer ridiculously broken.

  3. a.nye.123 says:

    Best fruit-eating simulator ever.

    • Mr_Hands says:

      I’m holding out for Fruit Eating Simulator Extremes.

    • 12kill4 says:

      Im waiting to see if they release the Colonics DLC pack before I buy.

  4. Jamison Dance says:

    This is brilliant. More please.
    **I eat the army guy.**

  5. Navagon says:

    Wait until you get a gunship of your own. Oh, and a jetski. And an island with a mansion built by two people. One who repeatedly beats the other on the head with a hammer while he’s talking. The tanks are nice too. Apparently they can shoot people too. Never bothered trying personally. What’s the use when you can run them over?

  6. Chris D says:

    I absolutely want to read about another 24 hours of fruit-based mayhem. Admittedly I’m not sure I could stand 24 minutes of actually playing this game, but it’s nice to have people to do that sort of thing for me.

    It’s also nice to see a developer who is not afraid to avoid overwrought, macho voice acting and go with a “handy phrases for use in an island based terrorist uprising” feel.

  7. mitkoa says:

    Please don’t.

  8. WJonathan says:

    Looks a bit rough, but I’m sure Deep Shadows will release a patch improving IA and character movement when hooting.

    • Navagon says:

      Characters do owl impressions? Okay, now I’ll admit I must have missed this bit.

    • Web Cole says:

      I admit – I lol’d. Maybe even rofl’d a bit. Who knows.

    • Martha Stuart says:

      This has to be the first and only game that has an enema as an in game item. what does it do? does it restore health? mabie stamina? i just dont know……

  9. multiname says:

    That video is amazing! I’d love a game that explored the relationship between a Dutch mercenary who pathologically adopts a bad imitation of a posh UK accent and his grandfather who only refers to him as “gringo.”

  10. DeepSleeper says:

    This is like the Adventures of Hunter S. Thompson In The Land of Gratuitous Fruit.

    I mean that in the best possible way. I too crave more.

  11. Fitzmogwai says:

    Is debry related to Dobly, out of interest?

  12. Andy_Panthro says:

    Unbelievably bizarre, and I humbly request that you keep going until there is no more fruit to be eaten!

  13. sonofsanta says:

    There is nothing on television, in cinemas or on paper as funny as Quinns just playing a game.

    I mean, eating fruit should not be this funny.

  14. Flint says:

    I read the article and then I eat a biscuit.

  15. HermitUK says:

    I’m pretty sure those “voice actors” are a text to speech program. Possibly they hired the NPC from Portal: Prelude to be their action hero. Either or.

    • Grape Flavor says:

      my thoughts exactly. something very robotic about those voices rather than genuine terrible acting.

    • roryok says:

      yeah I definitely got that feeling too. but then, there were parts that seemed to have emphasis, which is something speech engines can’t do as far as I know.

  16. patricij says:

    I wonder if you can attack them with the fruit…and get shot in the face. And I also laughed all the way through the list of items he carried…well done!

    • zergrush says:

      Makes me wonder if the gentlemen on the island are well-versed in the fine arts of combat against fruit-wielding maniacs.

    • noom says:

      That was an excellent inventory. The inventory of a man who knows how to party.

    • LionsPhil says:

      They were only shooting him so they could disarm him of his banana.

      More of this sort of thing.

  17. TonyB says:

    I’m currently struggling with the idea (and associated mental image) of carrying an enema around, what with it being a procedure rather than an object. Apart from that this game sounds incredibly believable and realistic.

  18. suibhne says:


    (Unless you’re on a crusade to “correct” the tortured etymology of that word – in which case carry on, by all means. :) )

  19. nuh uh no way says:

    I post a comment and then eat a cheesesteak.

  20. Hensler says:

    Any sort of mod/fan patch underway for this? I’ve been pretty impressed by the improvements I’ve already found for Precursors.

  21. moyogo says:

    Made me laugh in the law library. I must be serious now!

    “A rebel colonel intercepts me on my way out of town. The rebels want to work with me. Well, who wouldn’t? I eat a banana.”

    • Firkragg says:

      “A rebel colonel intercepts me on my way out of town. The rebels want to work with me. Well, who wouldn’t? I put on my robe and wizard hat”

      Hillarious read, please do a 48 hours one too!

  22. ix says:

    I feel I should point out that botox injections are actually done in the face and not in the lips (that’s sillicone you’re thinking of). In fact, many people who get botox injections can’t really show emotion properly anymore, since a lot of their facial muscles are actually paralysed.

    Thus endeth your cosmetic pharmaceuticals lesson.

  23. noobnob says:

    I wait for the next 24 hours of White Gold then I eat a banana.

  24. Davie says:

    So it’s Just Cause: The RPG.

    Except Rico forgot all his interesting equipment and he’s managed to find a small tropical archipelago inhabited by the very dregs of the voice-acting business. Awesome.

  25. MikoSquiz says:

    So what you’re saying is, it’s Elder Scrolls: South America?

  26. Pani says:

    This is like a chuckle brothers version of Farcry 2. I love it.

  27. kyrieee says:

    Debry? Debris?

  28. Lambchops says:

    I eat a cond . . . wait a bloody minute, I was sure I’d selected the pineapple. Well that’s put a dampener on my plans for tonight I can tell you, I hate it when I get stuck with only a pineapple for protection.

    • RegisteredUser says:

      ..and that’s how the pineapple got to be next to the bed in the morning.

  29. Voidy says:

    Pure gold. I hope Quintin will have something more to say about factions, because they made Boiling Point kinda engrossing. Every mission you completed for any of the six (or was it five?) factions affected your standing with several other factions. Trying to stay on best terms with all parties (or at least not to piss off everyone) was a crazy balancing act. It required figuring out what missions and in what order to do and finding the most beneficial way to accomplish each one. And sometimes it led to some hilarious situations.

    Once I was asked by the guerilla commander to blow up two anti-aircraft units at the nearby military base. I was reluctant because it wasn’t exactly going to improve my relationships with the army guys. Nevertheless I arrived at the base and stood watching the AA guns and pondering what to do next. While I was at it, a helicopter belonging to the drug mafia tried to fly over the base, was promptly shot by said guns, fell on top of them and exploded, destroying both. Presto, I completed the mission without moving a finger.

  30. MrSelfDestruct says:

    A little off topic, but…how was Precursors?
    It looked interesting.

    • Navagon says:

      RPS have done a very good, balanced Wot I Think on the game already. It sums up my impressions of the game. Essentially it’s a game for people who have a thing for rough diamonds. Games with imagination and insane levels of ambition that cannot quite be matched by their budget.

      It’s a very playable game with no significant bugs that I’ve noticed. It does seem to suffer memory leaks after a while though. The worst thing is the translation, but that’s being worked on by the same guy who did the Bloodlines patch. So that should be improved no end over time.

    • MrSelfDestruct says:

      Yeah, i just remembered reading a part of that review.
      So, I guess if I loved the first stalker not fully patched, I will love it aswell.
      Thanks for the reply. That game (and maybe White Gold too) is going right to my to-buy list.

    • Archonsod says:

      Precursors is brilliant. And also contains copious amount of suspicious fruit eating (but space fruit!) and alcohol drinking (space alcohol!).

    • MrSelfDestruct says:

      Isn´t there any space sex? :)
      It seems really interesting with that fps/rpg with space sim elements, and the design is great. So much colour.
      I cannot spend 20 bucks right now, but I´ll get it this summer for sure. I¨ve got it located at gamersgate

    • Chopper says:

      Precursors WAS great. This does look extremely similar though, pretty much a re-skin.

    • JB says:

      Space alcohol? Illegal space beer is illegal…

      (I miss Sleep Is Death)

  31. Wilson says:

    Oh hell!

  32. RagingLion says:

    This kind of article is pretty much what I associate with RPS most. Good read and hope to see some more.

  33. EBass says:

    Wait this got released? I hadn’t heard anything about it for so long I assumed it got cancelled, did like boiling point a lot actually and I never found it horrendously buggy. Might go for this sometime.

  34. gwathdring says:

    I rather like those patch notes. :)

    “Police station cannot be destroyed by crossbow anymore.”

  35. captain fitz says:

    “I eat a pineapple” is the new “I’m on a horse”

  36. El Mariachi says:

    I’m nonplussed. You went to the army colonel after stealing his generator for the rebel colonel? No wonder he was nonplussed as well.

    (it doesn’t mean “unimpressed”)

  37. Xiyng says:

    So brilliant. This game sounds so bad I might love it.

    I suddenly got the urge to try Boiling Point again…

  38. CdrJameson says:

    Can’t wait to hear the sea shanties that perk unlocks.

  39. SMiD says:

    “From here I mosey on into town and am fairly impressed by the range of people and things I can buy.”

    Ingame slavery? Sold.

  40. brulleks says:

    Must admit, I used the user-made English translation mod when I played it, so it was in the original language with the subtitles explaining everything (reasonably) well. I feel as if I’ve missed out on much of the experience.

    Still enjoyed the game – up until it opened out into one long, uneventful ocean trek after another.

  41. Kelron says:

    Good read but it sounds like less fun than Boiling Point was.

  42. McDan says:

    Fixes: Car disappearance. Who would want to fix that? Sounds like part of the game to me.

    Edit: Also this article is pure brilliiance, definetely should do 48 hours if you can stand it that long.

  43. Colej_uk says:

    Can you still (I’ll use the word ‘apply’) fruit and food to different parts of your body to heal them?

    I loved the fact I could heal my wounded legs by rubbing oranges and coconuts into them in Boiling Point.

  44. lethu says:

    “Myself and the beautiful car drive off. I drink two beers and crash the car into a ditch. I reload my save. Myself and the beautiful car drive off. I drink two beers, plus the whiskey, narrowly skidding my way around the ditch. Ha! Who’s laughing now, ditch? I drink the rum.”

    Priceless, more please.

  45. ZIGS says:

    When was this officially released in Europe?

  46. Archonsod says:

    Just how hilarious is the voice acting? One of the things that had me in hoots in Precursors is the same guy does all the voices. Including the female characters …

  47. BobbleHat says:

    But does it have a theme song during installation?

  48. Inigo says:

    I was expecting to see “AND IN THE GAME” at the bottom of all that.

  49. Freud says:

    I wish my grandpa had called me “gringo”.

  50. Adekan says:

    RPS – Torturing themselves for Games Journalism. Let’s turn this into an endurance run!.