Write Graffiti For Serious Sam 3: BFE

I'm going to be the winner.

A rather silly email appears alerting us to the shock news that Croteam’s Lead In-Game Wall Graffiti Artist, Davor Kovač, has quit the company midway through the development of Serious Sam 3: BFE, “to pursue his dream of being quoted in a rushed press release”. So now the team are asking players to come up with the nonsense that will appear on the game’s walls.

Davor Kovač told someone,

“Writing lines for wall graffiti in first-person shooters is a lost art. There is literally no way anyone else other than me could write these lines. Definitely not Serious Sam fans.”

Why, that pretend cad! So the call is on for people to make their own suggestions for what should be scrawled around the game. Publishers Devolve are suggesting people tweet their ideas with the #SeriousSam hashtag, and then follow @SeriousSamIAm to see which lines are proving popular. Or if you’re so inclined, you can use something called “Facebook” to do the same, on this page.

Devolver’s CFO, Fork Parker (who you absolutely should follow on Twitter, although it’s rarely SFW), adds,

“All unused lines will be collected and released as a $50 Graffiti DLC Pack. That’s motherfucking capitalism right there.”


  1. Magnetude says:

    I think Devolver is the only PR company I can actually say I love. Or have any feelings for at all.

    Edit: Ah, I see they’re a full-blown publisher, not just PR. Love them even more.

  2. Jambe says:

    What silly, great promo work.

  3. Sarkhan Lol says:

    Thanks for pre-empting Poo Willy, jerk. >:(

  4. TsunamiWombat says:

    Genius. Pure and simple.

  5. Bfox says:

    Waiting for all suggestions to be meme based…
    Although I would love seeing “I never asked for this” appear on a wall…

  6. wisnoskij says:

    “All unused lines will be collected and released”
    What? So anyone can write anything no matter how racist, rude, or otherwise offensive and as long as they submit it ti is guaranteed to be published (if only in a separate DLC pack.).

  7. ZIGS says:

    I’m gonna name my firstborn Fork Parker

  8. Mr_Initials says:

    “That’s motherfucking capitalism right there” should be graffiti in the game. Also “Quinns was here”

  9. gallardo1 says:

    tit job!

  10. Wozzle says:

    I want to purchase this.

  11. ZIGS says:


  12. Meusli says:

    I always liked the Leisure Suit Larry ones “Scott me up, Beamie!” & “It takes leather balls to play rugby!”

  13. Linfosoma says:

    “Bam. Tit job.”

  14. Corrupt_Tiki says:

    Have to have ‘Kilroy was here’, also maybe, ‘That’s a nice everything you have there’.

    Ahh could have some fun with that haha, I am looking forward to getting serious!

  15. Burning Man says:

    Best PR/Marketing job ever.

  16. Shadowcat says:

    Well obviously: “Aaaaaarrrgggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!”