Yo Ho Oh Shut Up: Pirate Offers Appear

I'll accept it if everyone's talking like Murray.

So, it’s bloody Talk Like An Idiot Day. Oh, internet, you’re good at some things, but you’re not at others.

And worse, Talk Like A Pirate Day has now become so horribly commercialised. Remember when it was all just that annoying friend thinking they were being amusingly wacky? Perhaps wearing a novelty eye-patch and shouting “ARRRRRRHHH” until someone punched them? Those original values are lost amongst a bunch of publishers and developers thinking it canny to release pirate-themed news today. So it is that Tales Of Monkey Island is on sale, and Pirates Of New Horizons promotes itself with a video. And there will probably be others too. More details below. (NO NOT “BELOW” LIKE ON A PIRATE SHIP.)

Oh, it's a bit smug, isn't it?

So Telltale in a zany press release, in which they’ve attempted to write a pirate’s accent in text, have made it known that the full series of Tales Of Monkey Island is on sale for a week, starting today. At an impressive 70% off. “That be some fine booty!” they say, apparently without shame. Although it seems they’ve shot their cannon load a little early, since the offer doesn’t appear to have started. Expect this to be available on their site once lazy America is properly awake.

Can it be talk TO a pirate day?

Then there’s Pirates Of New Horizons, a platformer by Exit Strategy that’s currently in prototype for anyone to try. Using Unity it looks like an interesting project (and I promise to give it a proper look soon). But then they went and did this:

I’ll add others if they appear.

Me hearties.


  1. Anthile says:

    I liked Tales. It wasn’t spectacular, suffers from most Telltale flaws (“This place sure looks familiar!”) but overall I had a good time and I even laughed at some point (which, as a proper PC gamer, I usually don’t do). Still better than the 4th game.

  2. JFS says:

    Yesterday, the German Piratenpartei scored 9 percent of votes in Berlin’s state elections, which is a huge success for them (yes, Berlin is its own state). It’s the first time they enter a state parliament – how unfortunate that Pirate Talkey Day is only today.

    • DrazharLn says:

      You should lobby them to change it to be a whole week or month.

  3. sinister agent says:

    Give us all your cargo and a pile of ransom money or we’ll shoot you with this AK47. Right in the stomach. It’ll be awful.

    • Mattressi says:

      Hey dude, I’ll give you this totally legit copy of a game for $5.

  4. Tusque D'Ivoire says:

    The funniest thing about this talk like a pirate day is that just yesterday, the german pirate party got voted into the Berlin City Parliament with nearly 9% in their first run for election (in Berlin). an overwhelming success!

    Edit: heh, didn’t really expect to be the first one to write about this.

  5. LarsBR says:

    I shall obtain illegal copies of these games to celebrate the day.

  6. Mario Figueiredo says:

    Or you could avoid spending money and celebrate the day playing Puzzle Pirates java MMO. A game that strangely made the whole pirate speech work. Maybe because you don’t hear it, but read it.

  7. Donncha O Caoimh says:

    I’m surprised you didn’t install the Pirate Talk plugin on your blog in celebration of the day!

  8. fenriz says:

    find on page – ghost pirates of vooju island

    no results.

    Heigh, me hearts.

  9. ninjapirate says:

    In other news, the German Pirate Party received 9% of…
    … ah, yes, it’s already been mentioned.


  10. Zaboomafoozarg says:

    I’d rather talk like the world’s most powerful demonic talking skull. Who wants to start an annual “Talk like Murray” day?

  11. IcyBee says:

    It has nothing to do with PC games, but the new Aardman Pirate movie looks brilliant!

    • westyfield says:

      How was I not aware of this before now? This is an outrage! I am outraged!

      Yes, that does look brilliant.

    • Wulf says:

      That does look incredible.

  12. JackShandy says:

    You know what I’d prefer? Talk like you’re from the 1920’s day.

    “You know what they say, sugartits, when the stakes are down and the jam is rolling you’ve got to dive a long way to easy street before everything turns out Jake.”

  13. Tim James says:

    I’m amused that anyone at RPS is shameless enough to chide others for running bad jokes into the ground.

    • DaFishes says:

      Seriously. Do we really have to get so jaded? “HURF DURF PIRATE IS SO FIVE MINUTES AGO”

      Just roll with it for a day. Better yet, enjoy the absurdity. Tomorrow we can return to our emo hipster routine.

    • Droopy The Dog says:

      I think pretentious humour is kinda like the plot to highlander, you have to decapitate other people’s fun to get stronger. When no other jokes remain you get “the prize”, that being finally living upto the pretense that you’re the wittiest person alive, by default.

  14. FCA says:

    My Somali isn’t nearly good enough to participate in this day.

  15. Baboonanza says:

    YO HO HO who’s been a good boy then?

    Wait, I’m not doing it right am I?

  16. shoptroll says:

    Doesn’t Telltale do this every year?

    • TNG says:

      So it’s time to start a “Talk Like a Dino” day so we can get a sweet discount on their Jurassic Park game.

  17. Kaira- says:

    I say, what fine booty. Arr. Was supposed to be much more pirate-y. Yar.

  18. Capt. Eduardo del Mango says:

    Heh. “Talk Like A Pirate Day” is, of course, pretty annoying. But coming from England’s extreme South West there’s some satisfaction to be derived that, thanks to Mr. Newton’s 1950 performance in Treasure Island, large numbers of people are engaging in what should actually be titled “Talk (roughly) Like A Cornishman Day”.

  19. Hoaxfish says:

    Fortunately, “Yarrr” repeated over and over sounds a lot like “Jar Jar”. So, just in time for the Star Wars re-release.

  20. Kandon Arc says:

    “Yarrrr Yarr Yarr Yaarrr Yaarrr Yarrrr Yarr Yarr Yaarrr Yaarrr Yarrrr Yarr Yarr Yaarrr Yaarrr Yarrrr Yarr Yarr Yaarrr Yaarrr”

    Dear God, it’s like Hot Fuzz all over again.

  21. Bobsy says:

    How The John Walker-Grinch Stole Talk Like Pirate Day

  22. LostSoviet says:

    Direct2Drive is having a Pirates Week promo. 60 to 75% off LEGO Pirates of the Caribbean, regular Pirates of the Caribbean, Space Pirates and Zombies, and Sid Meier’s Pirates!

    (I have a website where I track digital distribution deals as they happen.)

  23. Hyperion says:

    when has there been a holiday that wasnt overly commercialized? I like this one though. need more light-hearted holidays.

  24. Renfield says:

    Consider this, John: it’s actually my birthday today.

    So *every* time I have my birthday, people talk like pirates.

    • Wulf says:

      Yarr… I’m thinkin’ it must be bein’ quite the burden for ye.

  25. Gzack says:

    Hey, it’s my birthday too
    Happy Birthday Matey!