Hard Graphed: Fifa Manager 12 Demo

Oh God, oh God, make it stop.

Rock Paper Shotgun has recently received a number of complaints about our foot-to-ball coverage. Upset readers have claimed that we do not take Britain’s most popular sport at all seriously, instead reporting on any of the extremely popular games related to the pursuit with tired running gags, false ignorance and undeserved disdain. It has been pointed out to us that a great many of RPS’s readers are likely not only foot-to-ball fans, but fans of foot-to-ball gaming, and in our incessant use of stupid jokes and degrading remarks, we are alienating these readers from the site, and failing in our duty to provide accurate, engaging coverage of a large element of PC gaming.

But then they’re foot-to-ball fans, aren’t they? That’s just the sort of thing they would say. The idiots. Meanwhile, there’s a demo out for EA’s FIFA Manager 12.

Fifa Manager 12 is, cleverly, the seventh in the series, unless you count when the games were called Total Club Manager, in which case it’s the 10th. It, like Foot-to-ball Manager and Championship Manager, is about not actually playing the Hooligan’s Game, of course. It’s about graphs, and firing people. And the most inappropriately bombastic music ever to have scored a screen of budgets.

Which is what the game immediately greets me with, after I’ve selected my 101 year old female manager of Swansea FC, Simon Managerface, who speaks only African dialects and hates England. And good grief, that’s the thing. I know I’m not exactly renowned for my patience with any game requiring managing any resource of any kind, but at least let it be magic or space diamonds. Actual money? I have to do that with my real-life taxes. I’m late filling in the forms, because there’s nothing on Earth I hate more than sorting out my taxes. I’m getting letters from my accountant telling me off, informing me that it’ll cost an extra £50 if it’s not done by the end of October, and I’m not going to do it because I’d rather pay £50 for the right to put off doing it for another month or two. So why – why in eighty thousand billion years – would I ever want to be worrying about similar things in a fictional setting. It’s like playing a game about getting the flu, or having done a poo that’s splashed up onto the rim of the toilet in someone else’s house and there’s no toilet brush. So yes – perhaps my dislike of managing accounts (or indeed cleaning toilets) is personal to me, and perhaps you like doing that. But that leaves me with only one question: what’s wrong with you?

The demo allows you to play the Club Manager role, with teams from Austria, England, France, Spain, Switzerland, or Germany. The rest of the world is greyed out. I picked England, because it recommended it, and Swansea, because I’m amused by its relocation to England. And the first thing I’m faced with:

“The Board will keep 18% of the overall budget in the reserve budget for the season.

You can distribute up to 30% of each budget towards other budgets.”

REALLY? That’s a game to you? My goodness, you can pay me £30 to do my accounts for me, if you like. I’ll even put on some ludicrously pompous orchestral music as you do it, and let you pick which accent you want to use.

I really can’t even play it. Just looking at the screen, the calendar, the pages and pages and pages of graphs, charts, budget reports, statistics, training rosters, profiles, emails to answer… oh good grief, LET ME OUT!

So yes, I don’t like foot-to-ball, I don’t like management games, and I don’t like real life responsibilities. I’m not exactly the target audience for the game. But I think the point I’m trying to make is, anyone who is the target audience is plain weird. I think you are weird. You can get the demo from here, if you’re weird. The full game is out tomorrow.


  1. Ba5 says:

    Here’s William Shatner covering Queen:

    This has nothing to do with the game. But you obviously need something else to write about.

  2. RevStu says:

    Fucking HELL! What is WRONG with you? You can’t just announce a FIFA demo like that! Where were the posts trailing the announcement of the announcement of its imminent announcement? Now I’ve had a heart attack and died. You cunts.

    • AndrewC says:

      Good god the shock of RevStu’s death by heart attack caused by this article has given my brain an aneurysm and I am dead. Nice fucking one RPS.

    • sneetch says:

      Good gravy! John just killed two readers and Alec is willfully lying about Manbat! Could this be RPS’s darkest hour?


    • Ian says:

      I would’ve had a heart attack and died at the surprise too, but fortunately I was playing Spreadsheet Manager 2011 at the time.

    • JackShandy says:

      Thank god you answered that question and stopped that horrible tension in time, Sneetch. RPS could of had a triple fatality on it’s hands.

  3. Ondrej says:

    She’s thirteen, John, THIRTEEN! You charmer you…

  4. Drake Sigar says:

    I need this game.

  5. CaLe says:

    Many people who play this type of ‘game’ don’t actually play other games I think. I don’t know if it was this manager sim in particular but there was an outrage that one these games was going to require Steam, where some of the more astute enragees came to the conclusion that Steam was nothing but spyware! Poppycock!

    • mickygor says:

      Yup that’d be FM09, my brother’s copy is tied to my steam account D:

    • Snesso says:

      A friend of mine, which plays LOTS of RPGS, MMOs, racing games, RTS and even a bit of FPS, LOVES Football Manager. Hes crazy for it, and even gifted me a copy to play with him. Needless to say, after an hour of headache trying to manage my first team, I set it on window mode and skipped every turn while browsing stuff.

    • Arvind says:

      To be honest, if all you want to do is play FM then Steam and it’s additional features (most of which require being online all the time) are pretty much useless.

  6. machinaexdeus says:

    I like graphs, but I do not care for foot-to-ball, will I like this game?

    Also why cant we have a (new) rugby manager? Graphs about men hitting other men would be more interesting than graphs about men falling over pretending they are hurt.

  7. Teddy Leach says:

    I dislike BallFoot or whatever it’s called.

  8. aircool says:

    Everyone likes football, it’s just most people haven’t realised it yet.

    • CaLe says:

      and I quote, “But then they’re foot-to-ball fans, aren’t they? That’s just the sort of thing they would say. The idiots.”

    • RaveTurned says:

      I used to think I liked football, but then I realised what I actually liked was being in confined spaces with sweaty men, shouting at things.

  9. Taidan says:

    I wish to make a complaint about the undue weight of coverage given to this Ball-o-Foot craze, when it is clearly nothing more than a passing fad that will be forgotten in a flash.

    This is a serious website for serious gamers, not some kind of playground for people to have fun in.

    • syndrome says:

      I don’t see any ties around here. Where’s the tie on my avatar?

  10. McCool says:

    I’m not 100% sure what the point of this article was. Confirming prejudices and insulting people’s tastes? This is RPS, there is definitely something more going on here but, erm…is the point of this article just that John was the wrong person to write the article? Because that shit is meta.

    • Dozer says:

      This article is brilliant – it really made me laugh. I’d hazard a guess that none of the RPS staff have much love for games that simulate the joys of Microsoft Excel, and the best thing that RPS could do with this game is to make fun of it, and the people who play games like it.

      Now while I don’t care about ballfoot (although I work for an orthopaedic clinic that could probably cure that condition), I love building stuff in Microsoft Excel, and making elaborate charts showing the exact fuel economy of my car over the years. I’m probably one of those people who would enjoy Spreadsheet Manager 12. But I might as well just go to sqlzoo and play with databases – it’s free and I get to learn a bit of SQL while I’m at it! (Plus I can ‘play’ at work.)

    • leeder krenon says:

      weird, i thought it was jokes? people on the internet do not seem to deal well with jokes that criticise their favourite things. it is sad. (this is a reply to mccool, not the post above mine that miraculously appeared during the construction process)

    • Dozer says:

      Yay! I can do miracles!

    • McCool says:

      On my first read through I must have missed the jokes. It just came off as a little mean-spirited. I was drawn in, waiting for the punch line, but the punch seemed to be a literal “fuck you” to the people who like this sort of game. In an article that pretty much is expressly for foot-to-ball management fans.

      I’m of the opinion that some of these games are really quite wonderful and offer some of the best game design and game stories to be found anywhere. But yeah, it does look a little like excel. Not the easiest UI to get into. But can you imagine such a mean-spirited RPS article about Dwarf Fortress? No, because that game has dragons in it and, I imagine, because foot-to-ball management games have too strong connotations with the real-life sport writers like John so dislike. I don’t know about you but I’m not that big a mining fan, and yet… actually to tell the truth I used to out-right despise foot-to-ball, until PES’s Master League and then later Championship/Football Manager drew me in. Honestly, I like the real sport because it’s a bit like the games.

      I say all this, but enough people found the article funny, so it served it’s purpose. I must have missed the point. I haven’t had any breakfast yet, and my humour-nodes probably need a recalibrating anyway. Still, I think us downtrodden foot-to-ball gaming fans still reserve the right to have a bit of a moan when the us out of us is taken. And hold onto the hope that somehow, one day, they’ll be a RPS regular to “gets” it.

    • Meat Circus says:

      John doesn’t joke about things like this. Oh my no.

      Simon Managerface is 101.

    • ix says:

      Some of the RPS staff seem to like Eve well enough, so it’s not a thing against excel simulators in general, just when they mention football. :->

      Now I wouldn’t touch these games with a ten foot pole, but I think this article is far from funny and more than a little offensive. Do the same thing around casual games and there’ll be 5 links in the next sunday papers about how casual gamers are gamers too. As it stands, this article is petty, stupid and yes, more than a little elitist.

    • Ian says:

      It strikes me that this was probably meant to be very much in keeping with the previous “foot-to-ball” posts on RPS but this one does seem to have slightly missed the mark, and comes across as dragging a genre onto the front page so it can be whipped.

    • dsch says:

      Agree. Starting to cross the line between a joke and deliberate ignorance.

    • bluebomberman says:

      You guys seem to be blind to what message you’re conveying to readers. Writing posts that belittle many of your readership as “idiots” and baiting them with long, unfunny, mocking articles might win you a few brownie points with the anti-football crowd, but it ultimately makes you all look petty and small.

      If you don’t give a hoot about a game, don’t write about it. Stop wasting our time.

    • Alec Meer says:

      But it’s only you, and you personally, that we’re trying to belittle, mock and waste the time of.

    • El_Emmental says:

      Personally, I found it funny :D

      It portrays the average non-Foot-To-Ball(s) Manager gamer, who only see it as a non-sense spreadsheet simulator, in exaggerated ways. John Walker perfectly knew that when he published that : repeated “you’re weird”, quick conclusion, not much incredibly [insert-an-adjective-here] puns. That was all done on purpose :P

      I guess he doesn’t get the whole excitement regarding football management thingy (neither do I to be honest – it’s one of my “gaming oddity” entry – once tried playing a Football Manager for several hours, same with Pro Cycling Manager, didn’t get it), and try to make fun of his own prejudices regarding that type of games by exposing what his brain tells him first when he think of the news “Fifa Manager 12 demo’s out” – and that’s funny because… arh I can’t do it, explaining the joke is not a job for me – that’s funny, by decree

      John Walker should make similar articles on some popular man-shoot games, with even more incomprehension (with culture gap on top of it ! :D)

      edit: also, football=>popular+hooligans+chav=>hardly compatible with the fine art of image-title humour

    • bluebomberman says:

      @ Alec:

      What kind of a response is that? I’m not the first person to say that these posts are insulting, as John acknowledges in the very first paragraph of his latest mocku-post.

      (For the record, I don’t even care much about football, mostly because I lie in a country where football means guys with helmets ramming each other until someone gets a brain injury. Your response, which assumes I’m just another easily riled up football crazy, further illustrates the malicious pettiness of this whole mocku-coverage.)

      Look, I can troll every post you guys write about MMOs and FPS and stupid little Flash games with “God, I hate these games, and anybody who likes these games are idiots.” But I don’t. Why? Because it’s freaking annoying! It’s much worse when you guys do it because it denigrates your entire body of work, which is otherwise really excellent and the best coverage of a market that is underserved by the gaming media.

    • DiamondDog says:

      I think the point is, once they realised a few readers got bent out of shape over their little jibes they knew they deserved to be wound up again.

      RPS are not above a good bit of trolling.

    • bluebomberman says:

      @ DiamondDog:

      They should be above “a good bit of trolling”, especially when they turn around and tell us to stop trolling.

    • El_Emmental says:

      @ bluebomberman
      “They should be above “a good bit of trolling”, especially when they turn around and tell us to stop trolling.”

      wouldn’t that be the ultimate trolling move ? :D

      Sure, they got the upper hand with the admin superpowers, but they’re playing home so it’s up to us to man up and show some real skills, no ? I see it as a challenge (imo)

  11. The Sombrero Kid says:

    That was amazing, thanks, it made me laugh.

  12. The Sombrero Kid says:

    The only reason real life football doesn’t have dragons in it is because dragons don’t exist.

  13. McDan says:

    Despite all these articles about games about it, the only thing I know about foot-to-ball is that you kick a ball with your feet or something? How vulgar, you probably don’t even have a HUD, madness.

  14. sarbu says:

    Really funny John, I LOLled a lot..but.. Y U NO leave someone else write a post on this s%&tting game? I think I get the point of the “weird” people.

    • Dzamir says:

      Because IT’S ROCK PAPER SHOTGUN and they do whatever they want, and they all hate football :D

  15. Capt. Eduardo del Mango says:

    “…at least let it be magic or space diamonds. Actual money? I have to do that with my real-life taxes.”

    “REALLY? That’s a game to you?”

    Not that this isn’t a perfectly valid reaction to have to this sort of game, but couldn’t the bulk of this article be applied to Sim City 2000 which, as I recall, everyone loves?

    • The Sombrero Kid says:

      Sim City 2000 has Giant Robots.

    • Capt. Eduardo del Mango says:

      Well yes, but only fairly irregularly, and as something of a gimmick. They’re hardly a core mechanic and it’s not like you can do much with them.

      Besides, so what? FIFA Manager 12 has Scott Parker.

    • McDan says:

      Everyone liked that game because it wasn’t just about money, and if you got bored you could

    • Capt. Eduardo del Mango says:

      Equally FIFA Manager 12 isn’t just about money, it’s also – rather significantly – about football. Money management clearly plays just as significant a role in Sim City as it does here.

      And if you get bored in FIFA Manager 12 you can

    • Wisq says:

      It’s true that SimCity is “spend money to lay stuff down on the map, watch people move in, make money, which lets you lay down more stuff”. And Football / FIFA Manager is “spend money to improve your team, play some games, make money, which lets you improve your team more”. That’s pretty much the core of any game with any sort of economics.

      IMO, the biggest difference is that you need a lot more unstated knowledge to know whether you’re even improving your team in one of the Manager games, and because there’s a strong random element (including the element of The Other Team which is different each time), it’s hard to know whether you’ve improved your team, whether your in-game strategies helped or you just got lucky, etc etc., unless you really know your football stuff.

      By comparison, SimCity tended to be a lot more clear about what you’d done wrong and what you’d done right. You could see right away whether people were moving in, and they would lay their complaints bare in front of you if something was wrong.

      In other words, SimCity was a game that taught you about city planning and maintenance. Football Manager is a game that sorta assumes you already know a bunch, or else there’s a much steeper learning curve.

      Then there’s the fact that improving stuff in SimCity gives you the feeling of building something, whereas improving stuff in Football Manager means watching numbers go up. Which is enough for MMO players, admittedly, but at least they also get direct control and battle tactics and the social aspect and stuff.

      Plus, you know, giant robots and stuff.

    • Capt. Eduardo del Mango says:

      I haven’t played a dedicated football management game since 1998 so I can’t comment about the difficulty curve thing directly – I’d be very surprised if it didn’t offer you some help on the tactics, though. But regardless, yes, Sim City and this are clearly totally different games but as you say there’s an identifiable “core [to] any game with any sort of economics”, and it’s that common core that John seemed to be solely criticising here as if it was unique to football management games.

    • Lacessit says:

      Capt del Mango Sir,

      You have made me a happy football-enthousiast/gamer today. Keep up the funny!

    • Wisq says:

      From memory (I think I played Football Manager ’09 or ’10) you had advisers who would suggest stuff at the team management / strategy level, but just meekly following their advice every time didn’t feel like much of a game. Plus then there’s the times when their advice is mutually exclusive (either directly contradictory, or too much for your budget), and so the higher-level decision still came down to you, qualified or no. Not to mention all the stuff they just assume you’ll know to (and how to) do, like investing in training (or not? I dunno).

      Honestly, it would have helped a lot if I were a major football fan, the sort that knows all the names and numbers of their team and what they did right for the past several years and what they did wrong and could extrapolate at least some of that onto whatever team I chose (perhaps my own). The sort of people who play “Fantasy [Insert Sport Here]” games where they try to make teams of all-stars and the like.

      Me, I do like the sport, but outside of watching the World Cup, I’ve never had much of a chance to follow it, seeing as how I’m on the wrong continent and all that. The one that thinks “football” is like rugby, except you stop the game a lot and wear tons of padding (the wusses).

    • Ian says:

      Now now, I knew about (and played) rugby well before I knew the tiniest thing about gridiron and even I know that the “the padding is for wussies” stuff is a bit silly. ;D

      It’s more akin to boxing. Much of it protects the person doing the hitting, not the one getting hit.

    • Capt. Eduardo del Mango says:

      Aye. Type ‘NFL greatest hits’ into YouTube and see if the ‘they only have pads ‘cos they’re soft’ thing still holds water.

    • Wisq says:

      Yeah, it protects the person doing the hitting, meaning they just hit harder. Which makes it all the more hazardous if anything fails or happens to hit in a way the equipment doesn’t protect.

      Besides, they’re wusses because they’re constantly stopping and getting substituted. Which is why they can afford to be walking padded tanks rather than the flexible high-stamina players of limited-substitution everyone-on-the-field games.

      Honestly, I can’t decide which is more boring — American football, or baseball. (Sorry, Yanks. You just have boring sports.)

    • Ian says:

      Those sports have plenty of standing around too, just the clock doesn’t stop while it happens as often.

      It’s really very different kinds of exertion and physical toll being taken, I wouldn’t say one (of rugby and gridiron, say) is tougher than the other. Just different.

  16. RaveTurned says:

    These management and tactics games are just not contemporary. When, oh when, oh when will some enterprising development studio get hold of the FIFA licence and give us the first-person manball-shooting experience we’ve all been secretly craving?

    • sneetch says:

      So long as the developers are fans of the original and are producing an FPS that’s authentic and faithful to the setting and essence of the foot-to-ball games then I for one eagerly look forward to playing the part of FURLONG MILLIGRAM in his quest to rid the pitch of the opposing team.

      I hope that the game tells the story of how foot-to-ball came to be from its roots as foot-to-severed-head.

    • Dozer says:

      Or, FIFA Manager Manager 12. You manage a games development studio developing the FIFA management game series.

    • VelvetFistIronGlove says:

      Furlong Milligram is an excellent name for the protagonist in a game about virtual killing. The game could be called, oh, something like “The Milligram Experiment”.

  17. mike2R says:

    This article makes me wonder if I still have my copy of Capitalism 2 around anywhere…

    Nothing quite like the excitement of making a fortune by supplying citric acid to the ice cream industry.

    • Erithtotl says:

      Capitalism 2 reference! Oh what a great game. Why didn’t they ever make a sequel. WHY!!!!

    • adonf says:

      For one second I thought that Capitalism 2 was a sequel to Das Kapital. You know, like the Karl Marx estate hired a cheap novelist to make a new book and renew the trademark on the characters.

  18. oceanclub says:

    I would honestly prefer to play around with the macro features of Microsoft Excel than play an actual football manager game.


  19. phenom_x8 says:

    “…we do not take Britain’s most popular sport at all seriously, instead reporting on any of the extremely popular games related to the pursuit with tired running gags, false ignorance and undeserved disdain”

    Exactly, that’s what I think! I’m not british anyway, but foot to ball is still my favorite TV shows than those pesky soap opera running everyday!

    And, I’m also thinking that RPS commentator were always making fun towards whoever who bought PES or FIFA series annualy! Honestly, sometimes it hurt me as PES player (its a fun game to play with someone you knew side by side, folks!) Most of you acting like a higher class PC gamer by saying that PES or FIFA fans as a dumb who bought the same game every year (just like COD fans)!

    I love Fallout, STALKER, Deus EX or the Witcher and able to finish them all! But I’m also loves foot to ball games as my time killer with my local friend . Is it wrong to buy foot to ball games, guys??

  20. Teronfel says:

    Faqing Arsenal,i could have won 135 euros buy no,you had to score in the last minute,why..why?

  21. idiotapocs says:


  22. Firkragg says:

    My brother managed to smash 3 keyboards during the 90’s in my youth due to playing Championship Manager (identical to Fifa if I remember correctly). He sure did like his Manchester United.

  23. constantino says:

    Oddly enough I’m a fan of Eskisehirspor (my girlfriend is from Eskisehir), the favourite team of the girl-man Simon Managerface. Seeing them beat Fenerbahce a couple years ago in their first season in the Turkish Superleague was like watching the Rebel Alliance take on the Death Star. But with footballs. Anyway it was great and entirely besides the point.

    My brother likes football manager games, but he also plays games that I also play, with much more in the way of shooting or magic or tanks or space nazis or shooting magic space nazis in tanks or etc. I never got into football management games but I never really tried, bar one occasion.

    In an effort to encourage some (probably unwanted) discussion, while charts and graphs are fundamentally less exciting than dragon-riding undead space marines, its still the basis of what makes up most strategy games, just in a raw-er format. Its not that weird if you find the subject matter interesting. Not more boring at least than charting the price of salt across the various towns of Calradia for someone who’s never played Mount & Blade. The point is how it interacts with your imagination, which as text-based game designers have known for 8,000 years, is all important. I played a much much earlier football manager game, probably in my late teens in the mid-90s and it was fun, or as fun as any magazine cover demo was, except for Speedball 2 and that turn based precursor to Advance Wars that I dont remember the name of. I don’t remember there being any music or an excess of charts, but I do remember leading Farnborough Town to mediocrity, failure and then further failure…its a bad example, but I remember the gripping anxiety as I watched the minutes of each game tick by with forlorn hope that this time, just this time the big flashing banner would report a goal for Farnborough.

    I’ve glanced at later games and I can see they are definitely not for me, but assuming that say D&D and Football are two distinct but equal interest groups, surely it cant be that surprising to see games in either group that strips the world down to its raw statistics.

    Anyway, that’s my treatise on why the article above is largely (but not entirely) wrong.

  24. Arvind says:

    Ouch. Okay John, we get it. You don’t like football games at all.

    I’m amazed not many people see the parallels between these games and games like Dwarf Fortress. This is a bit like rejecting dwarf fortress as a game for weird people by looking at the first 2 screens.

    Come on RPS, give football management sims a chance.

    • Kilrathi says:

      I’m personally hoping someone gets around making a Blood Bowl manager game. I would play the colon out of that. “The Orc board are satisfied with your k/d ratio this season.”

    • Hillbert says:

      I’m just glad we’re out of the days of 80s racism in Blood Bowl. Fans throwing pieces of cheese at Skaven teams? No one wants to see that in the modern game.

    • Chris D says:


      You probably meant someone should make a Blood Bowl Manager game on PC but, just in case you like games of a more cardboardy nature, have you seen this?

      link to fantasyflightgames.com Bowl: Team Manager

  25. eldunce says:

    Thanks. It seems like it’s been a while.

  26. Plivesey says:

    Mr. Walker, your article made my day. Thank-you.

  27. Lord Custard Smingleigh says:

    Foot to ball you say? It will never catch on. Give it 73% and be done with it, I say!

  28. Matt7895 says:

    Britain’s most popular sport? Try the world.

  29. Moth Bones says:

    If I were to do a ‘Gaming Made Me’ it would without doubt be on the Champo/Football Manager series. It is frightening how much time I have sunk into these games. So from that point of view I would like to say to RPS – please don’t ever change your amused, piss-taking attitude towards foot-to-ball. Even that phrase still makes me smile. I can’t see what ‘serious RPS coverage’ of these games would bring to the party – us adherents can get the facts about changes in the latest iterations elsewhere – so let the chuckling continue.

  30. Juggernaut says:

    I think folks are missing the point. Football Manager 2011 == Jagged Alliance 2.

    * It has the pseudo-RPG element of managing a group of individuals, with personalities and skills which you can train.
    * In both you can hire individuals on contracts. There is a money managing aspect.
    * There are injuries that occur that you need to adjust your team to account for.
    * Playing a match is like invading a sector. You don’t always win, and losses are part of the game..
    * Match resolution depends on tactics, not reflexes.
    * There is a global campaign progress.. either up the league ladder or toward Dederianna.
    * And more..

    OK so you don’t shoot people in the head in FM 2011, but every strategy game doesn’t have to be manshoots. My favorite games are FM 2012, JA2, X-Com (waiting on xenonauts really), and king of dragon pass. The themes are different, but the game play is actually quite similar.

    • Inglourious Badger says:

      Yes, this. I think RPS know it too, deep down, they just like writing funny things

  31. promenad says:

    I for one love football but will not play another video game until someone turns the FIFA/PES games into turn-based strategy.

  32. Myros says:

    Ok on something actualy related to the game (I know, spoil the fun):

    I wonder if they have actualy put a new match engine in there this time. Each year, for the past 6 or so, they have claimed a ‘new engine’ – which when actualy translated they meant updated graphics for the 3d match view and keeping the same old tired match engine with all the old bugs carried over.

    Especialy compared to the 3d match engine by the ‘other guys’ Fifa Manager just fails badly. A 45 minute half is played out in 6 actual minutes, which means in order to keep game scores somewhat realistic they had to almost remove all defense skills and strategies. Many of us played with modding the configs etc each year to try and stretch the game time to real time but all that ended happening was scores of 20:14.

    Id guess nothing has changed this year.

  33. Inglourious Badger says:

    Ok, there’s something I need to get off my chest here, and this is aimed at nobody in particular, and concerns only 10% of the current population, but what the HELL has happened to RPS commenters lately? What’s with all the “This joke is not funny”, “Your journalism is poor”, “you other commenter are a moron/idiot/poohead” comments!? It never used to be like this! I know I’m being a complete hypocrite as I’m now moaning about other commenters but seriously guys, chill out! If you want the latest release news about foot-to-ball management games that NOBODY is going to buy there are a million other websites out there that will do that. The reason this article is funny is that it is even here! On RPS! Where the writers can write about whatever they like! Articles are either going to be serious, inciteful or humourous, this is clearly the latter!

    These Victorian gentlemen are my idols, STOP MOANING AT THEM

    Rant over

    • DzX says:

      “If you want the latest release news about foot-to-ball management games that NOBODY is going to buy ”

      Not sure if serious…

      The Football Manager series currently cover 2 of Steams top 10 currently being played list.

    • Inglourious Badger says:

      Football Manager is, which is why FIFA Manager never will. I expect it only trades on people mistaking it for Football Manager. Can’t imagine anyone knowingly choosing it over Football Manager or needing both in their lives. Never played it though, so I really shouldn’t comment (FIFA manager that is, Football Manager I’ve played far too much for one lifetime), it’s just the impression you get from reviews

    • Ecte says:

      Inglourious Badger: Hear hear.

    • Ian says:

      “but what the HELL has happened to RPS commenters lately”

      The site got increasingly popular, that’s what.

      Also: I’ll say again that I genuinely think this was intended to be humourous as with any of their other foot-to-ball posts, and as a fan of football I’ve always found them highly amusing (particularly Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum 09.) This one just seemed to end on a bit of a sour note and was less about poking fun at both football and their lack of knowledge of it and more about John basically saying “christ I fucking hate this.”

      But at the end of the day it’s their site, and they do a find job of it. And it seems plenty of people have enjoyed this, so fair play.

    • penryn says:

      So we’re not allowed to say when we don’t find something they write funny (when it was supposed to be)? The best writers miss sometimes and this is these guys’ job. Honestly, we’re doing them a favor when we give feedback (good or bad), as long as we’re not assholes.

      So yeah: I didn’t find this funny. I didn’t find it offensive, like a couple of commenters, just not funny.

      Edit: Just realized I commented on a month-old post, so maybe this edit isn’t necessary, but: I’m not saying they owe us anything, just… there’s a relationship here, between writer and reader, and we’re allowed to give feedback.

  34. jaytea says:

    I can understand your dislike of managing finances but what I found particularly fun about Fifa manager is that if you just set it to easy and give yourself a wealthy owner money is literally irrelevant and you just get shit loads and it is all about making your favourite team and ploughing thru the seasons. Fifa manager has always been the best out of the management games because it doenst take itself too seriously unlike Football manager does and this is why i like it :)

  35. Chimpyang says:

    This article was just too malicious rather than funny…..normally the foot-to-ball posts stay on the right side of the line RPS walks, but this one went further and singled out a group of people (yes I’m one of them – 4 days on my Shef Utd save game in FM11) for everyone else to point and laugh down at…

  36. terry says:

    What do you have against Cliddesden City, John? :(

  37. Megadyptes says:

    I find these ‘foot-to-ball’ articles quite meh.