And: Serious Sam 3 Is Out Later Today

The third Serious Sam game is released on Steam at 6pm today. TODAY! That’s so soon it’s almost right now. I guess we are working on a review of it. Are we? I am imagining that the other members of RPS are sort of shrugging non-committally in response to this question, but actually I have no idea, because I am sat in an annex of my kitchen typing this gibberish into the internet, and they are off being heroes in various corners of post-industrial England. Perhaps they actually are shrugging, but have no idea why, such is their psychic connection to the PC gaming blog… So spooky. Anyway, there’s a launch trailer below, and a hands-on from John over here. Read, watch, think, judge, decide.


  1. PoulWrist says:

    Activated key :) Just waiting for release :D

  2. MadTinkerer says:

    No, wait! I’m only halfway through SS2HD! If I read too much about SS3, there will be spoilers!

    Is Mental still alive at the end? Will Sam ever realize Netrisca has a crush on him? Will Minor Biomechanoid #45 give up his life of violence and become a pastry chef? All of these questions might be answered later in Second Encounter! Must finish it quickly!

    • Vandelay says:

      I bought the HD pack months ago, meaning to play through them both, having only ever played the first before. I only managed to get about half way through the First Encounter. I actually only just loaded up the Second Encounter today. Only played the opening few minutes, but, fuck me, is it awesome! I hope this one can include some of the same insanity.

  3. Squishpoke says:

    My body is ready.

  4. caddyB says:

    This sounds serious.

  5. jetRink says:

    The first game featured a giant, rolling boulder as an homage to Raiders of the Lost Ark. So is this game’s giant boulder a reference to the first Serious Sam, or another homage to Raiders of the Lost Ark?

  6. Carr0t says:

    Most Important Question:

    Does it have co-op multiplayer?

    Absolutely the best fun i’ve ever had in a computer game was when myself and 3 friends had a LAN party at my place, loaded up on alcohol and junk foods, and played both Serious Sam games back to back on the hardest difficulty through the night. It was awesome. If SS3 also includes the ability to play the single player campaign co-op with friends it’ll be in my Steam account in minutes. Otherwise, i’m not nearly as bothered.

    • PoulWrist says:

      It has 16 player co-op multiplayer over LAN/Internet and up to 4 player split-screen on a single PC. Enough for you? :D

    • Carr0t says:

      Oh Dear God YES!

  7. Juan Carlo says:

    This looks awesome. Too bad they are releasing it in the middle of one of the biggest video game clusterfucks in years: Batman, Skyrim, MW3, BF3, Saint’s Row 3, etc, etc. I imagine it would have sold much better if they had released it last august, or something.

    • MadTinkerer says:

      That might have been a problem if I was interested in any of those other than SR3. (Well, okay Skyrim, but I’m waiting until it’s patched into a decent state.) Generic Soldier Simulator EA 3 and Generic Soldier Simulator Activision 3 in particular hold zero interest for me. I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels this way.

      Minecraft on the other hand, if I hadn’t already been playing it for a year, would have eclipsed all of them.

      EDIT: Oh wait: Super Mario 3D Land. Okay, it’s a Nintendo game and not on our Glorious Personal Computers. But it’s still far more interesting than either of the GSSs.

      So there you go: Super Mario and Serious Sam. The two games that matter the most this month.

    • Shooop says:

      But of those only Batman and Saints Row 3 are worth actually buying.

    • _PixelNinja says:

      For people who are on the fence, my advice would be to not buy Batman right now; the game is broken in DX11 (stuttering, flashing textures, sound issues etc.)

      Here is a screen shot from a member over on HardForum (i7 960 + GTX 480) of the game benchmark:

      link to

      Yes — minimum FPS: 0.

      Hopefully Rocksteady will release a patch to fix the game.

    • maktacular says:

      as mad tinkerer said, this is the only one that i think we’ll be really very fun. as for the rest, i mean, i’m still playing amnesia, due to the old “buy components when they’re cheaper, be 3-4 years behind in games” thing.

  8. DickSocrates says:

    I suppose they felt they had to put in some sort of story, the days of ‘you are a man in a map, kill everything find the exit’ are over, but even from the brief bit they showed in this trailer, it looks pretty terrible and at odds with the tone of the gameplay. They should have tried something a bit more meta, if meta isn’t too out of date.

    But that isn’t the point, the game part of this game looks exactly how it should. Even if that is practically identical to the first Serious Sam.

    • ankh says:

      Those days will never be over. Not with ignorant people like me still playing games anyway. :)

    • MadTinkerer says:

      Despite my joking about spoilers earlier in the thread, the Serious Sam series does have a storyline. It’s a bonkers storyline about “Sam, the next gizmo we need was hidden by the Egyptians over this way!”, and it was so un-intrusive you could miss it if you didn’t check the Netrisca menu every so often, but it was a storyline.

      Half Life 2 didn’t suffer from having an actual story, you know.

  9. Shooop says:

    Finally. The first multiplayer shooter of this year worth a damn.

  10. PatrickSwayze says:

    That music was fucking horrendous.

    I hate how ‘real’ pc gaming is the domain of entitled neck beards.

    • ankh says:

      Really strange comment. Why would you even care what ‘real’ pc gaming is? Are you being sarcastic? We really need a sarcasm font.

    • Rane2k says:

      Yeah, bizarre comment, you didn´t like the music, okay. But why you´d rage about entitlement and “real” pc gaming here?

      On topic: Amazon informed me yesterday that the physical release date changed to December 2nd, damn.
      (Ordering a physical copy, because despite the double discount on steam it´s still cheaper on amazon, and I like to have a box.)

    • Shooop says:

      Yes, how dare PC gamers be disgruntled at how 99% of games are half-baked half-assed console ports! They should shut up, shave and like it!

    • magnus says:

      As ever people like you don’t say what they like in a post , I’d guess from your tone it’s probably Coldplay, Smooth Jazz or that Hippety-Hop stuff the kids listen to nowadays, hmmm?

    • max pain says:

      Have no worries Patrick, Serious Sam 3 being a true PC game, you’ll have no difficulty modding in your favourite Bieber soundtrack, I’m sure.

    • lijenstina says:

      I am a table!

      Most likely.

    • MadMatty says:

      Just the crappy nu-school metal…they ruined that style with the crappy neck beard emo sections- they shouldve just done straight up growling if they cant sing for shit, but unfortunately it somehow caught on.

  11. Danny252 says:

    I don’t want to want it, but I do.

    Oh well, coursework can wait…

  12. Jimmy Jazz says:

    Huh… this seems like… what duke nuke’m should’ve been.

    I want to play this. and i probably would if I didn’t have the rest of Skyrim to play through, I’ll buy it later. probably.

  13. Hoaxfish says:

    All those sunglasses

  14. EBass says:

    Wait what really? I thought it was still months off, definate purchase though.

  15. Kollega says:

    The energy-grapple-glove-thingy Sam uses at a couple of points in this trailer seriously reminds me of the similar energy-grapple-glove from Bulletstorm. I get that both games are Eastern-European and of similar genre, but it’s obvious that some “creative borrowing” is in action here.

    Anyone knows of glove-mounted energy grapples that appeared BEFORE Bulletstorm?

    • GTRichey says:

      The kind of “creative borrowing” going on here looks just fine to me. While the general concept is the same it looks like practical application is very different.

    • Vandelay says:

      There was an earlier weapons trailer that featured two players combining the glove thing to rip some huge monsters head off. Definitely looks slightly different to the Bulletstorm one.

    • Chorltonwheelie says:

      Singularity gave good glove action.

  16. Baka says:

    “Only a few more hours before I go onto Metacritic and give Serious Sam 3: BFE a series of perfect user scores. What could go wrong?”

    link to

  17. JackDandy says:


  18. magnus says:

    I gave up Saints Row The Third for this, It’ll be Gooood!

  19. Berzee says:

    so spooky

  20. Kaira- says:

    Umm… is this too a Steamworks DRM-game? Tell me it ain’t so. :(

  21. elmuerte says:

    I probably missed that new item, but there’s no retail release of Serious Sam 3?

    Then I’ll wait for the steam sale.

    • Shooop says:

      It’s on sale right now. $5 off what’s originally only $40.

  22. Shooop says:

    link to

    Hippie blood is back.

  23. Urthman says:

    Wait, I thought at the beginning of the trailer that those shades and the Serious Plot Business tone and the terrible woman’s voice in your ear were a parody of games like Deus Ex or something.

    But then at the end it looks like Sam really is wearing those stupid glasses and listening to that terrible woman in the game for reals.


    • Ernesto says:

      Serious Sam isn’t getting serious for real, is he?? I too hope, that everything realworldserious will be followed by some serious mockery.

      Also: I want games where different render modes can be set; as in Far Cry. You could play in a tropical environment like on postcards, in a dark tropical environment, and cell shading was also possible to create a cartoon-like tropical environment.
      That’s because I like my Serious Sam more colorful and a little cartoon-like, not in realistic shades of brown/grey. Leave that for CoD and the likes.

  24. Shortwave says:

    I bought this game simply because it doesn’t take itself too seriously.
    I really just want to shoot headless kamikazes with bombs in their hands and not care about life.

  25. Tei says:

    Like other people, I would buy this game instantly.

    But I have my hands busy with …well.. 5 excellent games already. BF3, SR3, Skyrim, Anno 2070…. I can’t hardly find a way to excuse myself to buy this.

  26. Brise Bonbons says:

    Gonna wait for the RPS consensus on this one. While Fork Parker has been consistently brilliant, this trailer and others like it have really turned me off the game – or more accurately, they leave me worried.

    If CroTeam thinks what Serious Sam needs is a sexy lady talking in your ear and an AR with a red dot sight, well… That pretty much zeroes out my confidence in their vision for the game. I’ve been burned too much recently by indie devs trying to go mainstream, and in the process abandoning what made them great in the first place (most recently by RO2, which is a great – if buggy – game, but WTF: Who was asking for leveling and unlocks in RO?).

    I don’t have time to play another single player title now anyway, so I’ll wait on this one. Finally got around to buying Bastion and the Binding of Isaac, and I still have all the Stalker games (from the Steam summer sale) giving me sad puppy eyes…

    • Shooop says:

      Dunno about the dialogue, but here’s the scoop on the AR:

      “The Sniper Rifle from Serious Sam: The Second Encounter has been replaced with an Assault Rifle with red-dot sight. The assault rifle will still be usable and pin-point accurate when fired from the hip, making its sight only useful as a player aid for long-distance aiming. Most other weapons like the Rocket Launcher and Cannon will not have iron-sights or zoom modes.”

      link to

      And at the very least give Call of Pripyat a spin with the Complete mod.

    • Premium User Badge

      Joshua says:

      But you had an lady talking in your ear in Serious Sam 2 too. Increased game budget.

    • magnus says:

      Worry – The Bread and Butter of cautious gamers.

    • PoulWrist says:

      The same sniperrifle is still in there O.o it’s the Tommy Gun that’s been replaced by the AR.

      The saddest thing about SS3 so far is that you have to reload shotgun and assault rifle all the time. If they had infinite clips like they did in Serious Sam 1, it would’ve been way more fun. As is, their use is greatly limited. Atm I’m using the coach gun rather a lot more than I really wanted to use the shotgun, because that one is just so slow! They should’ve copied id more :( they know how to make good shotguns. And the one in SS1 was good! The one in this one :( meh :(
      Rocket launcher is great. Game is fun and very challenging so far. Your speed is just a little too low to outrun anything when going backwards and you can’t shoot while sprinting (or reload ;( wtf, you can do that in BF3!).

  27. dahools says:

    Noticed Sam in “bullet time” towards the end of that video please tell me that’s IN and not just a video effect for the trailer. That would be absolutely amazing in areas with hundreds enemies coming at you!

  28. Mut says:

    I’ll admit, I had my doubts that this would live up to expectations, but judging by the first couple hours of play, it absolutely does. Feels very much like a classic FPS (hey, I can actually move faster than 2 mph!), the shooting is solid, and the melee kills are really fun. I’m not a big fan of the iron sights, but they’re entirely optional, so whatever.

    Bravo, Croteam. Bravo.

    • PoulWrist says:

      Actually the iron sights make the pistol go extremely accurate while firing without them gives a spread. There is a reason for it, but you can ignore it mostly.

  29. Vandelay says:

    Well, been playing it for a little while now and finished the first 4 levels. It has moments of being a little too close to a fairly mediocre, but enjoyable, corridor shooter. The museum level, as well as the opening few moments (I believe RPS discussed this before,) are the worst offenders.

    Then, it shifts into being like a normal Serious Sam game, with a wide corridor filled to the brim with screaming headless guys chasing you, flanked by a dozen or so rocketters and skeleton creatures jumping in over the wall. Although not as over the top as the originals (yet,) it definitely points in the right direction during these moments. I hope that these moments become more frequent. They also seem to have made some of the enemies a fair amount bigger in size, so they all look pretty intimidating.

    Level design, on the whole, seems to be a little more interesting than most, although I’m growing a little tired of Cairo already. It can get a little confusing too, with most of the corridors looking much like another. A map overlay you could bring up could come in hand. There also seem to be a lot of secrets hidden around the place, which I’ve barely found any of yet.

    As for fears about some of the “modern elements” some people have been complaining about:

    – There is reloading on the shotgun, assault rifle and pistol (not on the laser gun or rocket launcher, don’t know about other weapons at the moment.)
    – You can look down the sights of some weapons, but I don’t believe it has an affect on your aim.
    – There is a plot, but it is all pretty secondary. It is told through a few cutscenes, as well as the odd voice in the ear moment, mostly from the woman in the above trailer. Cutscenes are skipable, so story can be pretty much ignored if you want.
    – There has been no moment where Sam is fighting alongside any of these other characters though and it doesn’t appear that it will go in that direction at any point.

    • Jackablade says:

      Is it funny? One of the best things about the previous games has been the bizarre Croatian sense of humour. The trailer doesn’t give much indication of much silliness, although in keeping with Serious Sam 2, I could imagine them continually taking the piss out of Call of Duty and its ilk.

    • PoulWrist says:

      Ironsights do have an effect on aim. I tried it with the pistol in the museum level because I was curious, and standing at the same distance, firing at the wall first with out iron sights and then with, there was a very clear difference between the two. Iron sights would, even when firing as fast as possible, result in an almost 0 spread, while no sighting would result in a wider spread. Nothing too wide, but enough that it matters at longer distances.

      And yes, the game IS fun. I found myself laughing out loud several times at some of the jokes and comments. There’s not a lot of “lol at this” stuff, like they had in say Duke Nukem 4ever or Bulletstorm, it’s more fluid and “subtle” than that. There’s a few bad ones here and there, but meh, more fun than not really. Also, Sam is portrayed in this extremely selfconfident way, like Duke Nukem before he became a clown.

      Things I disliked:
      Reloading. It makes the pumpaction shotgun and the assault rifle almost useless in anything but the small scraps of the first levels. I’m not too far in yet, but combined with the low speed you move at if you want to both move backwards and fire, the need to reload makes it really hard to manage any larger crowds of enemies. Swapping to the rocketlauncher becomes absolutely necessary when you get it, because the crowds of kleer skeletons and gnaar that are going to be storming you are far too many and you’re far too slow to take them on with coachgun and assaultrifle.

      Things I liked:
      Speed. Apart from the sad state of the assault rifle and pumpshotgun reload rates (and sg firerate) the whole thing moves at blazing speed. Stuff dies, spawns, moves around at crazy speeds, and you need to think about the environment too, as running for that healthpack in the middle of this fight might spawn even more enemies. Though it’s not as clear as in previous Sam games, seems more triggered by crossing certain lines than the direct pickup of items.

      Challenge. It’s really hard! I play on Serious difficulty and goddamn some of it is just crazy. The first bossfight with the Biomechanoid probably took me 20 tries before I’d “figured” it out. Later hordes of things become harder yet.

    • Vandelay says:

      Concur with the funny. I’ve laughed a few times, just in the first few levels. It doesn’t have zany-ness of The Second Encounter so far, but some of Sam’s quips are pretty good.

      The backwards run is a bit too slow for the pump action shotgun. I’ve had a few moments against the suicide guys where I have had to turn around and sprint. I wouldn’t say it makes it useless, but it isn’t great.

      On the difficulty, I’ve actually found it a little easy so far. Only playing on normal, but that often felt hard enough in the earlier Sam games and seems to have been scaled back (maybe not a bad thing.) Good to hear the harder difficulties are challenging.

  30. HeavyStorm says:

    Awful, god awful choice of music.

    And man, Iron Sights! The only thing SS shouldn’t have.

    Still, probably the best shooter to be out this year. And the previous. And the one before that too.

    • magnus says:

      And another one! (face palm) So what would you suggest?

    • Shooop says:

      Sights are only when you’re targeting things from a distance. Your guns are just as accurate without using them like they should be.

    • PoulWrist says:

      I tested the iron sights, they make the guns far more accurate. But it’s not really needed most the time anyway. It’s more like a nod towards the modern shooters, like you’re suddenly playing Call of Duty or BF3 but you’re shooting at all kinds of weird shit. Gives a really fun effect.
      Oh and the game is fun. I have laughed out loud a couple times at things said/done, and Sam is portrayed as this infinitely confident character, kind of like Duke Nukem of old, before he became a clown. So, all round, fun stuff.

  31. wu wei says:

    Just in case anyone else hits this…

    I couldn’t get SS3 to run on my dual 5850 GPU setup at a frame rate higher than 18…until I disabled Crossfire. Now it runs at 50-70fps.

  32. Pelerin says:


    Seriously though, I’m so excited – SS has always been awesome and I’m sure BFE won’t disappoint.

  33. Kato says:

    Please tell me Sam’s voice isn’t different. That’s all I care about.

  34. Shadowcat says:

    Looking pretty impressive on the whole, except:

    1. The singing at the end of that song: Really, really horrible. Why?!

    2. “It’s not over ’til I tea-bag every last one of you alien mother fuckers”: Ew. No. Sam Stone has always been a cartoon-violent sort. That was just Duke Nukem crass (and frankly, why would they want to associate with Duke after the train-wreck that was DNF?)

  35. Scandalon says:

    That looks ace. I love the (apparent) piss-take of all the characters having the fancy sunglasses (probably saves on having to model human eyes, which are tricky, too) and that Sam just wears jeans and a t-shirt. Always.