Guild Wars 2 Has A Beta & You’re Not On It

This is Derek, the Beta Dragon. Say hello, Derek. 'BEeeeeeeeetaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh.' Thanks, Derek.

Neither are we, DAMMIT. But news of Guild Wars stealthily entering closed beta for a lucky, handpicked few is news because this game has hiding over the edge of the horizon for so long by this point. A move towards any kind of beta, then, suggests it’s finally preparing to show itself off to the world in the not-too-distant.

Devs Arenanet whispered on their forums that a GW2 closed beta begins as of today, but you won’t know you’re on it until you know you’re on it. So if you don’t know you’re on it, you’re not on it. Do you know you’re on it? Then you’re on it.

Like the Dark Brotherhood, Arenanet will approach you in secrecy and invite you to join their ranks unbeknownst to the friends and family in your everyday life. For that life will become but a sham, a mere charade to mask your true purpose on this Earth: to help identity bugs and stresstest severs in a massively multiplayer online roleplaying game.

Details, such as they are here, but the long and short of it: if you find a website offering access, it’s a scam. We’ll let you know as soon as that changes, of course. OR WILL WE?

51 Comments

  1. Njordsk says:

    “You have no new mail”.

    Oh well…

    • zaphod42 says:

      Wow, you just made me imagine the “you’ve got mail!” voice for the first time in like a decade.
      Oh AOL, nobody misses you.
      Wait, do you UK folk even know about AOL?! Dodged a bullet there.

    • Yank12 says:

      I work shipping stuff, and it pains me every time someone has an email acct. @AOL.com. It’s alive. All those CD’s were worth it.

  2. johnpeat says:

    I hardly ever read email anymore – I guess this might make me do it :)

    *checks*

    Nothing from Blizzard or Arenanet, deletes everything else…

  3. Kits says:

    Shame. No invite for me either…
    On the plus side, I did get one for the next phase of The Secret World closed beta yesterday.

    • Melchor says:

      I hate you so much!

    • Christian says:

      Pshh!
      Remember what they told us: The first rule of Secret World Beta is: [..]

      (..or they might come and get us..)

    • sneetch says:

      Is it “only food or drink purchased in the Secret World Beta may be consumed in the Secret World Beta”?

    • Lord Custard Smingleigh says:

      No peeing in the beta.

    • Kits says:

      Really? I thought it was tease people with the fact you’re in and create conspiracies about why you got one and they didn’t.

  4. Lord Custard Smingleigh says:

    Being in the closed beta is just like being in love. No one needs to email you a code tell you you are in love, you just know it, through and through.

  5. sneetch says:

    Pick me! Pick me! Awww…

    They didn’t pick me. :(

  6. Dana says:

    The joke is on you, im in !

    …no Im not :(

  7. Flukie says:

    Its strict NDA so I guess even if someone was in, they probably wouldn’t be able to say they are in.

  8. Horza says:

    But how can they send me my invite when they haven’t asked for my email address?

  9. McDan says:

    Aww I didn’t get anything for this or the secret world, upset.

  10. Lobotomist says:

    There is simply no way to be acepted in this beta by any regular channel.

    People are either picked from well known guilds,players of GW1 , or being well known game testers.

    This is not for average joe

  11. Freud says:

    Theoretically a MMO has infinite dragons. That makes this game a favorite for GOTY 2012.

  12. nootron says:

    I GOT IT!!!

    Oh wait, false alarm. This is for “Gilled Wars”, an upcoming underwater/fish-themed MMO.

    • Abundant_Suede says:

      Suck it, losers! Got mine!

      …er, wait, no. Apparently this is for GouldWears, an apparel line dedicated to lovable potato headed character actor, Elliot Gould.

    • Premium User Badge

      Mungrul says:

      Yay! I’m In!
      Oh, actually, that’s my re-subscription notification for “specialist” site “Filled Boars”.

    • Coccyx says:

      HA, I know for a fact that I got in.

      Oh wait, actually this is from ‘guild wears’, the cosplay site. My mistake.

  13. Eynonz says:

    Just checked my emails and all I got is an Beta Invite for Starhawk on the PS3 sitting there…….oh well I gues i’ll go play that.

  14. Suits says:

    What’s this game? Oh who am I kidding.. :(

  15. Unaco says:

    No, that is not a dragon. Dragons are amazing. Skyrim has dragons. That looks like a slightly humanoid Lizard they’ve thrown wings on. Hell, it kind of looks like a leathery flying squirrel.

    • Dominic White says:

      It’s an undead aquatic dragon. And it’s bloody impressive – about five times the size of any you see in, say, Skyrim.
      link to youtube.com

      It’s also apparently one of the smaller dragons in the game.

    • Chris D says:

      I think you’ll find Unaco is referring to a remark made by another commenter some time ago in reference to Skyrim’s dragons.

    • Wulf says:

      No. Skyrim has oversized chickens. Bats or flying squirrels if I’m being more generous than that. And wyverns if I’m feeling kind. Bethesda can’t tell the difference, clearly. I suppose that this is true of most people. Skyrim, however, is not any standard for dragons. It MAY, however, be a standard for wyverns if you like what they’ve done with them. Personally, I think they’re all grey and kind of dull, and they all needed a colour pick-me-up with mods.

      So, for the purposes of education:

      Wyvern
      Dragon

      I’ll grant you that this particular example isn’t a great one by ArenaNet, though. I’m really not fond of it myself, or the entire battle. (It has a MEGA LAZOR in it, which seems to be jumping the shark a bit.) However, there are better examples. Such as the Shatterer, which has all of the standard dragon prerequisites.

      However, the dragon game I’m looking forward to most is probably the best modern gaming example of a dragon. Really, these are dragons.

      /dragon_nerd

    • Nick says:

      haha. guys, remember? like in that other thread? look at me I’m funny!

    • Dominic White says:

      I’m sure I’d be laughing at this witty joke if I’d read the thread in question… which I didn’t, so forgive me.

    • Hidden_7 says:

      To be fair, it was every Skyrim thread/comments section ever until the game came out.

    • FKD says:

      *shrug* I thought it was pretty funny myself…

  16. Vinraith says:

    Has Anet said anything about account security or account restoration procedures for GW2? Speaking as someone who had his GW1 account hacked through no failure on his own part (there was basically a back door through NCSoft’s password change system) and lost everything from years of playing only to be told there were no account rollbacks/restorations, this is kind of a deal-breaker for me.

    • GrandmaFunk says:

      I’m in the same boat, and while I had pretty much stopped playing GW by then and didn’t take it personally…it is something I’m curious/anxious about for GW2.

    • sleepysalt says:

      They actually recently added the ability to do account restorations in Guild Wars. Too late to help anyone who was hacked earlier, but hopefully it means they’ll do the same for Guild Wars 2 from launch.

    • felix6 says:

      Yeah same here bro. I had also pretty much stopped playing, but if they had left any characters other than the 55hp monk with any gear then I might have resumed playing from time to time… I did actually restore my account and get it unbanned. But to much of a hassle to get all my beloved gear back togeather with the fact that nobody I knew play’s anymore.

  17. NauravaNakki says:

    *Checks e-mail*

    One new message ! As I open the mailbox I immediately see the word Beta in the title of the new mail ! “Team Assault Beta – You have been invited!” -.-‘

  18. Buemba says:

    Fine! I didn’t want to be in that stupid beta anyway! I mean, who needs that when I can have plenty of fun poking the tip of my index finger with this awesome paperclip that I found under my mouse mat.

    Oh paperclip, you’ll never let me down.

  19. Potunka says:

    They beta make this open to the public soon!

    Yes.

  20. Dawngreeter says:

    This sounds almost like this beta test is going to be used for testing the beta. I didn’t know people still did that.

  21. CoffeeMug says:

    Everybody who is NOT in the beta should get together and talk about how not in the beta they are. We can then extrapolate who IS in the beta.

    • Buzko says:

      I can’t help but notice Wulf hasn’t posted in this thread.

      He must be either playing or in mourning.

  22. Tams80 says:

    Well Alec is in the beta because he’s a companion.

  23. Urfin says:

    I think that we who are not on it should get together and kill them who are. I’m installing bloody SWTOR instead, ffs :( Incomparable.

  24. derbefrier says:

    I hope this game can live up to its hype. Looks pretty cool though but I will not join the hype train untill some beta testers confirm the game is as badass as it sounds .

  25. Milos says:

    Checked inbox. Discovered an e-mail from “The Guild Wars 2 Team”. Peed myself crying tears of joy. Opened it to discover it’s just informing me the last class has been revealed. Wrote a pointless comment on rps.

  26. Kaiji says:

    I’m in!

    Tears!